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Old 25-09-2011, 08:09 PM   #1
healingisfreedom
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Default Talking with others who don't share your views

I want to start a discussion about constructive ways to relate and talk to people who do not share your beliefs.
I have seen people in the truth movement and other movements - myself included - who interact in ways that contradict what they supposedly stand for, without meaning to.

Here are some examples:

- from a place of fear (fear of "losing an argument" or looking a fool or being labelled or insulted)
- with the same desparate need to "convert" others to our way of thinking, that is shared by most of the population
- with a sense of superiority over the other person (e.g. "they are just a stupid sheeple")
- taking the comments of people personally, as a blow to the ego, when they are just a reflection of the person's state at the time
- feeling the need to stamp out "opposing" beliefs through ridicule, ad-hominem attacks etc.
- measuring success by the number of other people you can convert or "win arguments" with
- not being able to express ourselves without the ulterior motive of wanting to convince others and convert them
- being pre-occupied with what another person (e.g. stranger or friend or loved one) thinks or believes, when it is really not our business

Sound familiar? I think these kinds of mindsets and interactions are widespread in society, and as long as we continue to use them we are just opposames, fighting fire with fire.
It takes mental, emotional and spiritual maturity to get past all of that - and I'm not talking from a pedastal, I'm also still doing these things without meaning to. Maybe we all need to try to understand and relate to where the other person is coming from.
In a lot of cases, when faced with you and your beliefs they feel threatened, because on a deep level you are tapping into their fear of change, and undermining their security in their own beliefs, and showing them what they don't want to hear, i.e. that their belief is an indoctrinated one and not their own.
The more vigorously a person defends their belief and the less willing they are to question it, the more likely it is that the belief was indoctrinated and not arrived at freely.
I think that is the basic cause behind the sometimes vigorous name-calling, put downs etc, whether it's family and friends, or organised "skeptic" groups, or think tanks etc.

Things could be different when we come from a place of security and let go of the preoccupation with other people's opinions and with "winning arguments".

Maybe it would be helpful to keep in the back of your mind, the idea that what people say to you is a reflection of their mental and emotional state at the time. Maybe when someone argues with you, they are really saying "The fact that you think XXX makes me suddenly feel uncomfortable with myself, and I want to know if you are comfortable with yourself."

When you talk about issues, maybe it's good to personalise what you say, such as "I came to believe..." or "this is my way to do things..." or "after experiencing XXX I started to question YYY..."
Suppose someone says "Oh, you believe in those nutty conspiracy theories" or "that's stupid, because XXX", a constructive verbal response could be something that turns the focus back on the other person, like:
"You are free to think that if you want", or "You don't have to justify your beliefs to me", or "You seem upset about what I think, would you like to talk about it?"
Something that basically sends them the message that "Yes, I am comfortable with myself. You and I both have a right to think whatever we want. If you have a problem with my beliefs that is your problem not mine. I can help talk through your problem if you need to, but I am not going to force anything on you, and I'm not going to respond to any of your attempts to manipulate me."

I like the idea of "being the change" instead of feeling the need to "do or force the change" that you want to see in the world! This is all just my opinion and I would love to hear other ideas of things to say and ways to relate to other people, that come from a place of love rather than fear, and are constructive in the long run.
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Old 25-09-2011, 09:39 PM   #2
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Originally Posted by healingisfreedom View Post
I like the idea of "being the change" instead of feeling the need to "do or force the change" that you want to see in the world! This is all just my opinion and I would love to hear other ideas of things to say and ways to relate to other people, that come from a place of love rather than fear, and are constructive in the long run.
Damn!!! i deal with that all the time...

I don't like the idea of forcing as well. I always feel bad in the end.
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Old 25-09-2011, 10:19 PM   #3
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Originally Posted by healingisfreedom View Post
I want to start a discussion about constructive ways to relate and talk to people who do not share your beliefs.
I have seen people in the truth movement and other movements - myself included - who interact in ways that contradict what they supposedly stand for, without meaning to.

Here are some examples:

- from a place of fear (fear of "losing an argument" or looking a fool or being labelled or insulted)
- with the same desparate need to "convert" others to our way of thinking, that is shared by most of the population
- with a sense of superiority over the other person (e.g. "they are just a stupid sheeple")
- taking the comments of people personally, as a blow to the ego, when they are just a reflection of the person's state at the time
- feeling the need to stamp out "opposing" beliefs through ridicule, ad-hominem attacks etc.
- measuring success by the number of other people you can convert or "win arguments" with
- not being able to express ourselves without the ulterior motive of wanting to convince others and convert them
- being pre-occupied with what another person (e.g. stranger or friend or loved one) thinks or believes, when it is really not our business

Sound familiar? I think these kinds of mindsets and interactions are widespread in society, and as long as we continue to use them we are just opposames, fighting fire with fire.
It takes mental, emotional and spiritual maturity to get past all of that - and I'm not talking from a pedastal, I'm also still doing these things without meaning to. Maybe we all need to try to understand and relate to where the other person is coming from.
In a lot of cases, when faced with you and your beliefs they feel threatened, because on a deep level you are tapping into their fear of change, and undermining their security in their own beliefs, and showing them what they don't want to hear, i.e. that their belief is an indoctrinated one and not their own.
The more vigorously a person defends their belief and the less willing they are to question it, the more likely it is that the belief was indoctrinated and not arrived at freely.
I think that is the basic cause behind the sometimes vigorous name-calling, put downs etc, whether it's family and friends, or organised "skeptic" groups, or think tanks etc.

Things could be different when we come from a place of security and let go of the preoccupation with other people's opinions and with "winning arguments".

Maybe it would be helpful to keep in the back of your mind, the idea that what people say to you is a reflection of their mental and emotional state at the time. Maybe when someone argues with you, they are really saying "The fact that you think XXX makes me suddenly feel uncomfortable with myself, and I want to know if you are comfortable with yourself."

When you talk about issues, maybe it's good to personalise what you say, such as "I came to believe..." or "this is my way to do things..." or "after experiencing XXX I started to question YYY..."
Suppose someone says "Oh, you believe in those nutty conspiracy theories" or "that's stupid, because XXX", a constructive verbal response could be something that turns the focus back on the other person, like:
"You are free to think that if you want", or "You don't have to justify your beliefs to me", or "You seem upset about what I think, would you like to talk about it?"
Something that basically sends them the message that "Yes, I am comfortable with myself. You and I both have a right to think whatever we want. If you have a problem with my beliefs that is your problem not mine. I can help talk through your problem if you need to, but I am not going to force anything on you, and I'm not going to respond to any of your attempts to manipulate me."

I like the idea of "being the change" instead of feeling the need to "do or force the change" that you want to see in the world! This is all just my opinion and I would love to hear other ideas of things to say and ways to relate to other people, that come from a place of love rather than fear, and are constructive in the long run.

Me and a fellow icke forum member did a bit of activity in a certain town centre a few years ago. It was all going well we were talking and giving out leaflets regarding building 7 in the 9-11 attack .And had some positive responses till this stupid guy started to then tell members of the public did they know the queen was a lizard and even tony blair is not human but a reptilian.
They just thought we were nutters and sadly days of action stopped.
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Old 26-09-2011, 12:14 PM   #4
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Damn!!! i deal with that all the time...

I don't like the idea of forcing as well. I always feel bad in the end.
Yup, I end up feeling bad too. Sometimes I don't respond in the best way to people's quips, and for a short moment I am desparate to "force" the situation and convert them to my opinion. Maybe it just takes practice to master the situation properly - and if after any encounter with someone you feel bad, remember that you haven't made any "mistakes", just learned lessons!


Quote:
Originally Posted by nirvana View Post
Me and a fellow icke forum member did a bit of activity in a certain town centre a few years ago. It was all going well we were talking and giving out leaflets regarding building 7 in the 9-11 attack .And had some positive responses till this stupid guy started to then tell members of the public did they know the queen was a lizard and even tony blair is not human but a reptilian.
They just thought we were nutters and sadly days of action stopped.
That sounds very frustrating; well done for the demonstration anyway. Was that stupid guy a member of the public trying to discredit you, or someone on your team being very unintelligent?
The public is conditioned to see the reptilian idea as "loony", especially when it is presented without any of the background information or perspectives (which Icke provides beautifully in his talks). Unfortunately that makes it a drawcard that establishment-defending people and institutions like to use against us truth-seekers, to make us look like nutters.
It's hard, how you have to "hide" some of your beliefs for fear of damaging your credibility on topics that you are trying to talk to people about (just like in your case, 911) when by rights you really have nothing to be ashamed about!
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Old 26-09-2011, 01:01 PM   #5
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Find common ground ALWAYS. If someone has an interest in something talk about their interest then mention you have been looking into "fill in the blank" and find it very interesting.

Leave clues. Never give people the info, give them clues that make them very curious. Let them do their own looking.

Lastly live and behave in a way that makes other people respect you and want to have your way of life, then they will want to know what created your choices etc.
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Old 26-09-2011, 01:05 PM   #6
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Dont use tinfoil jargon.
Do research your subject properly (use sources that your audience will respect) and show how what you are saying applies to their real life.
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Old 26-09-2011, 01:07 PM   #7
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Lastly live and behave in a way that makes other people respect you and want to have your way of life, then they will want to know what created your choices etc.
This is very important. If you do not live your life in a way that inspires trust, people will ignore what you say even if you are saying how blue the sky is on a sunny day. Be honest, get a reputation for being honest, and people will be less likely to dismiss what you say. Not just for telling the truth, but being trustworthy and reliable.

Last edited by knightofthegrail; 26-09-2011 at 01:08 PM.
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Old 26-09-2011, 05:02 PM   #8
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it drives me freakin nuts see people polarize. im trying to learn how to ignore it but i keep having set backs...

"being the change" instead of feeling the need to "do or force the change"

thank you for starting this thread.
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Old 26-09-2011, 08:43 PM   #9
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Awesome thread. This is an important issue. And I've been going through it on WALLSTREET. I keep telling people, we need to argue more. We need confrontation. Without the confronting, there no issues being discussed just opinions being spewed. For example I might tell people what I believe in, the response might be.."well, ehhh .... This is how I feel........... YOU DIDNT CONFRONT ME ALL YOUR DOING IS BACKFIRING WITH YOUR OWN OPINIONS. Ask me why I feel the way I do, how did I come across this, I don't agree, hmm I can agree, I see, well yeah you have a point... WERE GETTING SOMEWHERE,..

You see, society nowadays is..." Run away from your problems....I'm depressed take these pills, drink this beer, listen to OTHER people's choices, don't talk to self. TALK TO YOURSELF.... WE CAN ALL AGREE TO DISAGREE. WE CAN TALK ABOUT IT. DISCUSS IT. RESEARCH IT. FIND SOLUTIONS INSTEAD OF 1 PERSON HAVING MAKING DEMANDS AND SHEEPLE USING A PEOPLES MIC LOL

. This is a big issue on earth. We'd rather turn to violence, fear, we want to hide , sneak, steal.... Throw in jail, leave it up to a corrupt judge,.... See a corrupt doctor or therapist. Agh... So many points.... I mean c'mon we eat food that evil corporationms feed us... THEY gave us cancer and we dont seem to care, they gave us drugs and we dont seem to care

.. We allow ourselves and children especially to be vaccinated because they say it's safer, then they admit experimenting with and creating diseases...

This system was built ground up. To crumble down. It's happening right now. Our leaders need to be ALL TRIED. ALL OF THEM. BECAUSE EVERY POLITICIAN THAT KNOWS WHAT'S GOING ON, ON THE INSIDE, THE SECRET CORE OF WORLD GOVERNMENT ON THIS PLANET IS COMMITTING HANEOUS CRIMES. THE PUBLIC SUFFERS. AND WE ARE LIED TO

THEY LIE CHEAT STEAL KILL HURT LOCK UP EXECUTE

WE SIT BACK AND TAKE IT

IF NOT US THEN WHO?
IF NOT NOW THEN WHEN?

WEARETHESOLUTION
THEQUESTIONANDTHEANSWER


WE NEED TO EXPOSE THE INNER GOVERNMENT ASAP!!! NOMORE PROTESTING AFAINST COPS AGAINST BANKERS. ASKING WTUPID DEMANDS AND SPREADING DISINFO IS AN EVIL DOING

IM GONNA STOP NOW.....

Last edited by da1reppinqnz; 26-09-2011 at 08:49 PM.
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Old 26-09-2011, 09:37 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by healingisfreedom View Post
Yup, I end up feeling bad too. Sometimes I don't respond in the best way to people's quips, and for a short moment I am desparate to "force" the situation and convert them to my opinion. Maybe it just takes practice to master the situation properly - and if after any encounter with someone you feel bad, remember that you haven't made any "mistakes", just learned lessons!




That sounds very frustrating; well done for the demonstration anyway. Was that stupid guy a member of the public trying to discredit you, or someone on your team being very unintelligent?
The public is conditioned to see the reptilian idea as "loony", especially when it is presented without any of the background information or perspectives (which Icke provides beautifully in his talks). Unfortunately that makes it a drawcard that establishment-defending people and institutions like to use against us truth-seekers, to make us look like nutters.
It's hard, how you have to "hide" some of your beliefs for fear of damaging your credibility on topics that you are trying to talk to people about (just like in your case, 911) when by rights you really have nothing to be ashamed about!
No the guy really believes the queen and tony blair are not human but reptilians
Hes been to most of Ickes talks and even shows people bits in David Ickes books to proove that they are not human but reptilian.
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Old 26-09-2011, 09:44 PM   #11
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Originally Posted by healingisfreedom View Post
Yup, I end up feeling bad too. Sometimes I don't respond in the best way to people's quips, and for a short moment I am desparate to "force" the situation and convert them to my opinion. Maybe it just takes practice to master the situation properly - and if after any encounter with someone you feel bad, remember that you haven't made any "mistakes", just learned lessons!




That sounds very frustrating; well done for the demonstration anyway. Was that stupid guy a member of the public trying to discredit you, or someone on your team being very unintelligent?
The public is conditioned to see the reptilian idea as "loony", especially when it is presented without any of the background information or perspectives (which Icke provides beautifully in his talks). Unfortunately that makes it a drawcard that establishment-defending people and institutions like to use against us truth-seekers, to make us look like nutters.
It's hard, how you have to "hide" some of your beliefs for fear of damaging your credibility on topics that you are trying to talk to people about (just like in your case, 911) when by rights you really have nothing to be ashamed about!
The whole reptilian thing is mostly speculation how ever we dress it up theres no evidence and its become the biggest defence the nwo have to tarnish the truth of banks,nwo etc.
The sooner we abandon the reptilian and moon is a spaceship thingy and concentrate on the political corruption and the corruption in the banks the sooner we are taken serious.
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Old 26-09-2011, 10:04 PM   #12
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yeah i cant wrap my head around how we just keep accepting this fucked up system. my generation x has got to be the dumbest fucking generation ever produced.. the younger generations like y just dont fucking care...but its the baby boomers who are now beginning to ritire who not only dont want to hear the TRUTH but they get angry at you for even bringing it up!!!


damn now im polarizing! lol
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Old 27-09-2011, 05:46 AM   #13
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Originally Posted by ufochick View Post
Find common ground ALWAYS. If someone has an interest in something talk about their interest then mention you have been looking into "fill in the blank" and find it very interesting.

Leave clues. Never give people the info, give them clues that make them very curious. Let them do their own looking.

Lastly live and behave in a way that makes other people respect you and want to have your way of life, then they will want to know what created your choices etc.
Thank you so much - excellent advice! I'm going to try the leaving clues approach. I guess that once you become detached from what you believe and stop investing your ego and personal identity in it, then you feel freer to use interactions with other people as an opportunity to leave clues and "give of yourself" rather than a fight to pursuade.
A friend recently suddenly started mentioning chemtrails, out of the blue (pun intended) - and said that in her home country people talk about them freely without the "conspiracy theory stigma"! And that really gave me an opportunity to leave a lot of clues about related topics.

Quote:
Originally Posted by knightofthegrail View Post
Dont use tinfoil jargon.
Do research your subject properly (use sources that your audience will respect) and show how what you are saying applies to their real life.

This is very important. If you do not live your life in a way that inspires trust, people will ignore what you say even if you are saying how blue the sky is on a sunny day. Be honest, get a reputation for being honest, and people will be less likely to dismiss what you say. Not just for telling the truth, but being trustworthy and reliable.
Excellent advice too. Sometimes the trouble is that I can't be 100% sure that my research is watertight on a topic, or that I can answer any and all questions posed to me (hey, do we ever get to that stage?)
Generally I try to get around this by never presenting info as fact or even as my belief, but just as something I have read and heard - e.g. "This guy XXX is saying YY because of ZZ" or "After seeing XX I have been wondering about YY"
And yes, having a lifestyle that inspires trust etc is a crucial foundation for "being the change" - if you don't then it's a case of the cobbler's children having no shoes!

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Originally Posted by lonestar View Post
it drives me freakin nuts see people polarize. im trying to learn how to ignore it but i keep having set backs...

"being the change" instead of feeling the need to "do or force the change"

thank you for starting this thread.
You're welcome. Well you're not alone - learning these lessons through more and more interactions with people is sometimes frustrating but ultimately one of the most worthwhile things!
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Old 27-09-2011, 11:16 AM   #14
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If you're really interested and you really want an answer:

'How To Win Friends And Influence People'



You might find audio versions of this kicking around etc..
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Old 28-09-2011, 11:03 PM   #15
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Originally Posted by lonestar View Post
yeah i cant wrap my head around how we just keep accepting this fucked up system. my generation x has got to be the dumbest fucking generation ever produced.. the younger generations like y just dont fucking care...but its the baby boomers who are now beginning to ritire who not only dont want to hear the TRUTH but they get angry at you for even bringing it up!!!

damn now im polarizing! lol
No worries, it's very tempting to polarise and I probably do it often without meaning to I guess it's a question of trying to empathise with where the people are at in their journey - if they aren't ready to wake up they won't, but in the meantime we can just show them other perspectives.
Yeah, I get sick of all this programming, when people think that the phrase "conspiracy theory" is enough to dismiss and devalue your perspective. Sometimes I try to remind myself that it's the system and not the person talking.

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No the guy really believes the queen and tony blair are not human but reptilians
Hes been to most of Ickes talks and even shows people bits in David Ickes books to proove that they are not human but reptilian. The whole reptilian thing is mostly speculation how ever we dress it up theres no evidence and its become the biggest defence the nwo have to tarnish the truth of banks,nwo etc.
The sooner we abandon the reptilian and moon is a spaceship thingy and concentrate on the political corruption and the corruption in the banks the sooner we are taken serious.
Oh, I totally agree. I think that all the "truther" concepts are like stepping stones, some are suitable "entry points" for the general public, some are definitely not, and it is these that the nwo likes to use to discredit us.
To do David credit I think he does do an excellent job making intuitive connections that are a kind of "circumstantial evidence" for the reptilian thing, but yes like you I am not sold on it - I'm open on that one.


da1reppinqnz, I hear you 100% and it is a truly crazy situation we are in right now - but I do have an optimistic view, I think that the Illuminati/NWO/negativity is just a passing phase whose role it is to be the catalyst for teaching humans to wake up and stop being so naive and lazy!
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Old 29-09-2011, 02:18 AM   #16
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healingisfreedom - So very well said, thank you. That was truly inspirational. It's been something that I've been battling with for such a long time now, and it's always been so frustrating to have people talk down to me simply because they bought every spoon-fed dollop of poop the mass media gave them, simply because "it was on TV," and presumably they aren't allowed to lie on TV or something. But what you have said here is awesome, in the truest sense of the word, and resonates exactly with what others have told me recently as well.

My problem has always been that I have a built-in need to try and educate people into thinking outside the box by giving them a snippet of info here and there, but I always seem to find myself confronted with choice media phrases used to discredit anything slightly paranormal, like "little green men" or "spaceship", which from then onwards completely discredits anything that I might tell them, regardless of how verifiable the point I'm making is.

So yes, I'm at a point where I've made people aware of my opinions, and now I need to convert my mindset from wanting to.... I dunno, "save" everybody?.... to just kicking back and keep reading and researching for my own benefit, and if anyone wants to come and ask me for my advice or opinion, they are free to do so at any time. It's just so damned hard, watching people meandering through their lives, doing exactly what they're told to, not stopping for a second to question anything because, "I don't read." That phrase has been the bane of my existence.... "I don't read." You almost want to respond with, "ye Gods, how do you even dress yourself in the morning without an instructional video from the government each day?"



Quote:
Originally Posted by ufochick View Post
Find common ground ALWAYS. If someone has an interest in something talk about their interest then mention you have been looking into "fill in the blank" and find it very interesting.

Leave clues. Never give people the info, give them clues that make them very curious. Let them do their own looking.

Lastly live and behave in a way that makes other people respect you and want to have your way of life, then they will want to know what created your choices etc.
Also a very good point. The only trouble I have with this is that I get impatient waiting for someone to see that I'm doing what I believe is the best that I can in terms of diet, spiritual development, political views, etc, and ask me about it. I just have this overwhelming sense that there is a deadline somewhere in the future (not necessarily the whole 21/12/2012 thing) for humanity to prove its worth and a need for it to continue. A bit like the opening scenes of "The Hitch-Hiker's Guide To The Galaxy" - submit your application for the case of survival, pass the test, be permitted to continue as a species.

And yet all I see around me on a daily basis is people getting progressively more and more stupid, thoughtless and sheep-like. The overall national IQ in the UK seems to be dropping like a lead balloon, as people chug down Aspartame-laden poisonous drinks, filling their faces with carcinogenic, fibreless beige foods and watching the British Brainwashing Corporation's latest collection of mind-control and inane and inconsequential reality shows. It doesn't really fill me with confidence, I have to say, and I worry that if First Contact (if it hasn't already happened) occurred in somewhere like Birmingham or some rough end of London, the ETs' first encounter of humanity would be along the lines of, "OK, so their accommodation has improved, as have their means of communication, but essentially they're still squawking and grunting, and they're still throwing rocks at us." I, for one, don't want to be tarred with that same brush.

I think a lot of this stems from a concept that, if humanity was to have a shift in consciousness that led to a loss of greed, the world would be a completely different place. Gone are the days where the strongest needed to accumulate the most food to survive the winter - survival of the fittest, I guess, or survival of the biggest, really - so why are we not all working together to fix places with constant internal conflicts, food shortages and disease? Christ, Bill Gates' fortune alone would probably go a good way to sorting it all out. How much money does one fucker need, really? OK, yes, so he's successful and he's probably worked quite hard at times to get himself where he is now (even though I suspect quite a lot of it was through back-stabbing and manipulation of one kind or another), isn't there a point that you pass where you look at your bank statement or portfolio and say, "Fuck, that's a lot of money! That's more than the GDP of several small countries put together. I should probably stop and let someone else have a go." Or at least start giving a helping hand up to those who haven't managed to achieve what you have? And what about the bankers who, despite having totally fucked the global economy (which in my mind, at least, constitutes a failing at their jobs), still managed to pick up a fat bonus cheque for sums between 5 and 7 figures? Don't any of them have conscience enough to say, "actually, no - we fucked up, we don't deserve these bonuses. Plough that money back into the economy and get things back on track."

I know it's easy for the "have-nots" to criticise the "haves", and I imagine there's at least one person reading this who wants to say, "come on - if you were offered a cheque from your employer for a 7-figure sum, you wouldn't turn it down!" Honestly, I can't actually say that I would, because I know what kind of a difference that money would make in the lives of my family and friends, but if I was on a disgustingly huge annual salary anyway and my family and friends were live quite comfortably as a result of that, then yes, I'm certain that I would turn it down. 100%, and I'd be sure to have an official, documented meeting with my "superiors" and the Head of HR to explain why.

Anyway.... Rant over, it's after 2am, and I need sleep. Thanks for listening, folks. And thanks again to healingisfreedom and ufochick for those great posts. Keep them coming!

Namaste.
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Old 03-10-2011, 02:55 PM   #17
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Default Here is a good recap

Here is a good watch : if they thirsty
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Old 05-10-2011, 08:27 PM   #18
neilbe
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I can tell you what works for me. First things first, I listen to what is being said, I mean really listen. Most of the time we roughly want the same thing anyway, its just a matter of how to get there. So, bearing this in mind, the first thing I do after listening is to find any point that I can agree with. Take most of the arguments on these forums. I would say that 95% of forum members want a more free and just world, the arguments are about how we create this place. Everybody wants to be happy, thats the common ground.

So, after listening and then agreeing where possible I would gently point out where in my opionion certain issues might arise. This takes a little practice and imo, the more humility and compassion you have the better. Sobriety helps.

Of course this doesnt always work for various reasons, but, it would help save alot of time, effort, distress, aggravation etc for all of us if we put our egos to one side and the search for truth up front and centre.
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Old 30-10-2011, 04:47 AM   #19
felakuti
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Quote:
Originally Posted by neilbe View Post
I can tell you what works for me. First things first, I listen to what is being said, I mean really listen. Most of the time we roughly want the same thing anyway, its just a matter of how to get there. So, bearing this in mind, the first thing I do after listening is to find any point that I can agree with. Take most of the arguments on these forums. I would say that 95% of forum members want a more free and just world, the arguments are about how we create this place. Everybody wants to be happy, thats the common ground.

So, after listening and then agreeing where possible I would gently point out where in my opionion certain issues might arise. This takes a little practice and imo, the more humility and compassion you have the better. Sobriety helps.

Of course this doesnt always work for various reasons, but, it would help save alot of time, effort, distress, aggravation etc for all of us if we put our egos to one side and the search for truth up front and centre.
From my experience the more 'humble' and 'compassionate' you come across, the more avidly your 'opponents' clamp down on you, shout you down, and/or resent you.

I think the best way to get through this is to be yourself. If you feel strongly enough about what you're saying, let it show. THAT is more likely to get people to consider/recall your line of thinking at some point in their lives when it matters to them.

Last edited by felakuti; 30-10-2011 at 04:50 AM.
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Old 30-10-2011, 05:22 AM   #20
ponzi nemesis
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maxinatlanta View Post
Here is a good watch : give them half a cup of water if they thirsty
Great video, thanks, and thanks to the OP and all the rest of you for this wonderful thread
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