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Old 09-04-2011, 06:31 AM   #1
verndewd
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Default habitually perpetuating the human

I got a bit of inspiration this evening
I have been thinking obscurely about all of the drama surrounding my life currently and in an epiphany i saw all this human interaction as a subconscious reiterration of all idioms past.
The emotional reality show we call life manifesting via subconscious means as the basic will to endure the human drama for the sole sake of experiencing the human drama to know that were alive at some level , that we respond at some level that we endure at some level even though most of what we endure we actually create consciously or subconsciously.
for one of the few times since childhood i refused to partake in the drama, it was blamed on me though it wasnt my fault entirely, the other participants fearing emotional retribution , sought me as the sole scape goat and even tried to indoctrinate me by emotional blackmail to endure the drama willingly as I simply refused and literally shut it out.
Because it really doesnt exist. The need for nourishment and safe harboring does in fact exist relatively, but the drama doesnt ; I fed it no energy and denied its fraudulent claim to reality, hence it ceased to exist for me. the strangled cries of why is he so mad to the self imposed tears of self sub standardization fell on pointedly deaf ears today as I watched in curiosity the pointless lament of self victimizers playing out the human conditions as if in a haze or deep sleep.
later on as I rummaged through the pathetic leavings of a family who i quote as saying we have a good family to get my daily sustenance long after the crowd had abandoned what wouldnt make a childs meal of chinese food where the others had obviously had their fill, and had to add other things to the meal they enjoyed in order to have my daily fill i sat and ate in peace 2without conflict and reflected on people with no internal light for the psychological map that is their lives; mind you , without nary a complaint but the thought of contradictions at their most basic form in what coukld be the most dire of circumstances if the wolrd was to fall apart as predicted by conspiratists.
There was a sort of elevation that came from the years of family servitude I have given and the selflessness it demanded to end up blamed on all accounts and denied a portion of the so called family meal .
You see my friends its truly action that judges us , so are you acting as an observer or participant? as a participant its highly unlikely that you are where you presume you are but as an observer its more likely that youre in the wrong place as you see the human drama for what it is; malignant.
You know that my year began with incredible difficulty, and it seems to persist though the more I detatch from the emotional aspects and relegate myself to the role of non participating observer the clearer the idea becomes that we are all observers though most of us chose to become embroiled in the human condition for the sheer fact that we feel it. there is no other reason.
I alone have helped my brother and sister both into higher forms of thought , and through great pain to my own emotional welfare where i sought to expend the effort but where id sought to not take part , all hell broke loose and I was at fault. the fake tears the scramble for a sense of ascribing to what was assumed I had asserted, pure insanity and blame.
yet for me a terse get the fuck out of my face and closing my door as I allowed their insanity to poison the air without affect to myself. strange as it is when you deny the drama around you it increases, as if desperately trying to warrant your attention.
And I think thats where the epiphany hit. do you want to partake in the human drama? and then the split of the human drama from the spiritual infinite peace i felt manifested. this human drama is senseless, it accomplishes nothing but the narcissistic persuit of feeling like youre alive rather than being alive. another psychological drug for the masses.
I will leave it at that for now

Last edited by verndewd; 09-04-2011 at 06:33 AM.
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Old 09-04-2011, 06:48 AM   #2
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I mean bump

I meant to post this in the awakening section.
people in general wont get this

Last edited by verndewd; 09-04-2011 at 06:50 AM.
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Old 09-04-2011, 06:55 AM   #3
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so will it be moved or do I double post?
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Old 09-04-2011, 08:03 AM   #4
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I do see it and I do get it. I have flipped my lid so to speak. I became "aware" of illuminati stuff etc since aprox 2003. Before that well my life as is was still is different to most. Yet familiar to some. Expat most of life etc. and all that entails. Anyway that and before that I have already left my body, etc so already knew some things but holy shit... I mean really the thousands of years, the technology that exists already etc its life changing to say the least to any. (annunaki stuff etc, ufo etc) I mean it will take and has all of us for a fooking loop at the very least. I get what Icke had. I get the head explosion shit. I will give away my age if I delve into much of that... Just saying that yes this should be in another section but also of late I am going "more" mad in particular and I have seen that expressed on this forum and all over really. Saturating even mainstream media. I am having conversations of only the deepest level and/or none at all. I have one friend as in one for real, can see etc lol not on inet. And this one friend I only kept in the beginning cuz of knowing since forever so... family like, you just love as they are and more important they you! I am either going mad because as the new age people say a shift and/or midlife crisis? I can't tell the difference. Anyway you are well mad my friend as am I and thats the preferred state as far as I am concerned so ..I mean, I walk my dog. Most do. But for me its spiritual, (for lack of better word). The trees I see, my dog's enjoyment, etc just flowers all of it. LOL maybe spring fever enhanced. I know I sound like a crack pot and I am lonely but at the same time I couldnt be with another at this time. Changing too much and too fast.
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Old 09-04-2011, 08:28 AM   #5
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NP verndewd.
I haven't got time to read just now, will do later
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Man everywhere seem to be caught in the denial of reality. They fear the awful truth and are turning a blind eye… .Therefore, they avoid it and cast it from their minds and consciousness.
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Old 09-04-2011, 04:45 PM   #6
verndewd
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Quote:
Originally Posted by janedoe View Post
I do see it and I do get it. I have flipped my lid so to speak. I became "aware" of illuminati stuff etc since aprox 2003. Before that well my life as is was still is different to most. Yet familiar to some. Expat most of life etc. and all that entails. Anyway that and before that I have already left my body, etc so already knew some things but holy shit... I mean really the thousands of years, the technology that exists already etc its life changing to say the least to any. (annunaki stuff etc, ufo etc) I mean it will take and has all of us for a fooking loop at the very least. I get what Icke had. I get the head explosion shit. I will give away my age if I delve into much of that... Just saying that yes this should be in another section but also of late I am going "more" mad in particular and I have seen that expressed on this forum and all over really. Saturating even mainstream media. I am having conversations of only the deepest level and/or none at all. I have one friend as in one for real, can see etc lol not on inet. And this one friend I only kept in the beginning cuz of knowing since forever so... family like, you just love as they are and more important they you! I am either going mad because as the new age people say a shift and/or midlife crisis? I can't tell the difference. Anyway you are well mad my friend as am I and thats the preferred state as far as I am concerned so ..I mean, I walk my dog. Most do. But for me its spiritual, (for lack of better word). The trees I see, my dog's enjoyment, etc just flowers all of it. LOL maybe spring fever enhanced. I know I sound like a crack pot and I am lonely but at the same time I couldnt be with another at this time. Changing too much and too fast.
pretty much

you can look at the human as a bipolar energy generator, one subconsciusly always perpetuating infinite energy yet funneled through the thought processes which subconsciously perpetuate the madness of the human drama for the single minded goal of feeling the totality of the lower vibrational experience.

Last edited by verndewd; 09-04-2011 at 04:48 PM.
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Old 09-04-2011, 04:50 PM   #7
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NP verndewd.
I haven't got time to read just now, will do later
Thank you
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Old 09-04-2011, 05:04 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by verndewd View Post
I got a bit of inspiration this evening
I have been thinking obscurely about all of the drama surrounding my life currently and in an epiphany i saw all this human interaction as a subconscious reiterration of all idioms past.
The emotional reality show we call life manifesting via subconscious means as the basic will to endure the human drama for the sole sake of experiencing the human drama to know that were alive at some level , that we respond at some level that we endure at some level even though most of what we endure we actually create consciously or subconsciously.
for one of the few times since childhood i refused to partake in the drama, it was blamed on me though it wasnt my fault entirely, the other participants fearing emotional retribution , sought me as the sole scape goat and even tried to indoctrinate me by emotional blackmail to endure the drama willingly as I simply refused and literally shut it out.
Because it really doesnt exist. The need for nourishment and safe harboring does in fact exist relatively, but the drama doesnt ; I fed it no energy and denied its fraudulent claim to reality, hence it ceased to exist for me. the strangled cries of why is he so mad to the self imposed tears of self sub standardization fell on pointedly deaf ears today as I watched in curiosity the pointless lament of self victimizers playing out the human conditions as if in a haze or deep sleep.
later on as I rummaged through the pathetic leavings of a family who i quote as saying we have a good family to get my daily sustenance long after the crowd had abandoned what wouldnt make a childs meal of chinese food where the others had obviously had their fill, and had to add other things to the meal they enjoyed in order to have my daily fill i sat and ate in peace 2without conflict and reflected on people with no internal light for the psychological map that is their lives; mind you , without nary a complaint but the thought of contradictions at their most basic form in what coukld be the most dire of circumstances if the wolrd was to fall apart as predicted by conspiratists.
There was a sort of elevation that came from the years of family servitude I have given and the selflessness it demanded to end up blamed on all accounts and denied a portion of the so called family meal .
You see my friends its truly action that judges us , so are you acting as an observer or participant? as a participant its highly unlikely that you are where you presume you are but as an observer its more likely that youre in the wrong place as you see the human drama for what it is; malignant.
You know that my year began with incredible difficulty, and it seems to persist though the more I detatch from the emotional aspects and relegate myself to the role of non participating observer the clearer the idea becomes that we are all observers though most of us chose to become embroiled in the human condition for the sheer fact that we feel it. there is no other reason.
I alone have helped my brother and sister both into higher forms of thought , and through great pain to my own emotional welfare where i sought to expend the effort but where id sought to not take part , all hell broke loose and I was at fault. the fake tears the scramble for a sense of ascribing to what was assumed I had asserted, pure insanity and blame.
yet for me a terse get the fuck out of my face and closing my door as I allowed their insanity to poison the air without affect to myself. strange as it is when you deny the drama around you it increases, as if desperately trying to warrant your attention.
And I think thats where the epiphany hit. do you want to partake in the human drama? and then the split of the human drama from the spiritual infinite peace i felt manifested. this human drama is senseless, it accomplishes nothing but the narcissistic persuit of feeling like youre alive rather than being alive. another psychological drug for the masses.
I will leave it at that for now
Excellent post...I agree with your perspective of how things don't 'have' to be a drama...i am trying to work out lots of things in my mind but then i think why??? I just should BE.
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Old 09-04-2011, 05:34 PM   #9
verndewd
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Originally Posted by codie View Post
Excellent post...I agree with your perspective of how things don't 'have' to be a drama...i am trying to work out lots of things in my mind but then i think why??? I just should BE.
I was reminded of a point in time where nothing really affected me as a child. I had to work hard to get to the emo stage thinking it was novel. i didnt realize at 11 you could get stuck there. lol

When you cant stop the madness and its all around you in lethal doses, all you can do is go up, and question the reasons or lack of reason that creates such petty dialogues of energy. Moreover why is it that one chooses to acknowledge them with participation at all. In theory one could just deny them any standing, but its not that easy is it? Not unless you have an army around you willing to put down the jerry springer resistence movement at your beckoned call.

truly the magnitude of the drama doesnt exist but the requirement for a dialogue does, unfortunately those persuing the required dialogue are doingt so from a non existant platform, a reality totally contrived out of thin air from nothing but imagination.
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Old 09-04-2011, 08:19 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by verndewd View Post
it accomplishes nothing but the narcissistic persuit of feeling like youre alive rather than being alive.

Quote:

The Meaning of Life -- Part One: Meaninglessness

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lhn8QKyu00I


Code:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lhn8QKyu00I
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Old 09-04-2011, 08:43 PM   #11
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Originally Posted by lizzyking View Post
.
he gets it
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Old 09-04-2011, 08:56 PM   #12
verndewd
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I suppose I am leaning negative in a sense that I havent really offered an insight into what types of things a person can do to release the weight of fabricated paradigms. But at the same time thats what all of the awakening movement promises to do.

But does it? Most of what I read feeds the limbic centers of the brain by evoking emotion which is again subconsciously perpetuating the human psyche over the infinite mind. And I think thats where you draw the line in observing so called wayshowers; because either consciously or subconsciously your emotiveintellect is largely being manipulated to the degree that it serves anothers sense of false grandeur. And is the primary reason I speak in quantum spiritual psuedo science terminology.

Because I leave it to the person to create or not create anything from that and suggest no emotive motivators , actually quite pointedly deny them as much as I can. Because the matters of spirit arent the same as low vibrational rationalizations on measuring out emotional responses or motivating people via the same mechanism.
That, by its very nature is deceptive and the tactics if used by any reveal a person insecure enough to try and seek a following rather than create a base of equal thinkers all putting energy and ideas into moving forward to greater infinite ideas.

Last edited by verndewd; 09-04-2011 at 08:56 PM.
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Old 09-04-2011, 09:23 PM   #13
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Originally Posted by verndewd View Post
Most of what I read feeds the limbic centers of the brain by evoking emotion which is again subconsciously perpetuating the human psyche over the infinite mind.


Quote:
I still want to to be human again
What am I?
What am I?
I'm a murderer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ExLqMBLyWd8
Code:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ExLqMBLyWd8
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Old 10-04-2011, 01:49 AM   #14
verndewd
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Originally Posted by lizzyking View Post
I was referring to more subtle nuances
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