Jump to content

(much needed) HUMOUR THREAD


Recommended Posts

  • Replies 1.4k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

My Next life - George Carlin

 

In my next life I want to live my life backwards.
You start out dead and get that out of the way.
Then you wake up in an old people’s home
feeling better every day.
You get kicked out for being too healthy,
go collect your pension,
and then when you start work,
you get a gold watch and a party on your first day.
You work 40 years
until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement.
You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous,
then you are ready for high school.
You then go to primary school,
you become a kid,
you play.
You have no responsibilities,
you become a baby until you are born.
And then you spend your last 9 months
floating in luxurious spa-like conditions
with central heating and room service on tap,
larger quarters every day and then Voila!
You finish off as an orgasm.
I rest my case.

George Carlin, 1937-2008

  • Haha 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
10 minutes ago, Basket Case said:

Looks like it was originally Sean Morey. 

I'm sure George did a better version but can't find it yet.. 

maybe in his younger days, i don't think he would use someone else's material.....

maybe in a interview 

Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, Basket Case said:

Looks like it was originally Sean Morey. 

I'm sure George did a better version but can't find it yet.. 

 

Quote

Variations of this piece have also been misattributed to Andy Rooney and Woody Allen. The original source is a variation on a piece by Sean Morey. ( "snopes.com: Andy Rooney on Everything", Snopes.com, 2012-09-09 http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/rooney3.asp, )


https://quotepark.com/quotes/1771548-george-carlin-i-want-to-live-my-next-life-backwards-you-start-o/

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...