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A HUMOUR THREAD


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My Next life - George Carlin

 

In my next life I want to live my life backwards.
You start out dead and get that out of the way.
Then you wake up in an old people’s home
feeling better every day.
You get kicked out for being too healthy,
go collect your pension,
and then when you start work,
you get a gold watch and a party on your first day.
You work 40 years
until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement.
You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous,
then you are ready for high school.
You then go to primary school,
you become a kid,
you play.
You have no responsibilities,
you become a baby until you are born.
And then you spend your last 9 months
floating in luxurious spa-like conditions
with central heating and room service on tap,
larger quarters every day and then Voila!
You finish off as an orgasm.
I rest my case.

George Carlin, 1937-2008

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Guest Gone Fishing...
11 minutes ago, Mr H said:

In my next life I want to live my life backwards

 

Have you watched the 2008 film, 

"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" ? 

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2 minutes ago, screamingeagle said:

i'm not sure that is Georgys joke,bit it's brilliant never the less 

I'm fairly sure I've seen him saying that. 

I'll try to find it.. 😉 

 

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25 minutes ago, screamingeagle said:

how did i missed that...i'm waiting ☺

 

Looks like it was originally Sean Morey. 

I'm sure George did a better version but can't find it yet.. 

 

 

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3 hours ago, Basket Case said:

Looks like it was originally Sean Morey. 

I'm sure George did a better version but can't find it yet.. 

 

Quote

Variations of this piece have also been misattributed to Andy Rooney and Woody Allen. The original source is a variation on a piece by Sean Morey. ( "snopes.com: Andy Rooney on Everything", Snopes.com, 2012-09-09 http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/rooney3.asp, )


https://quotepark.com/quotes/1771548-george-carlin-i-want-to-live-my-next-life-backwards-you-start-o/

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