Mr Crabtree Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 3 minutes ago, Mr H said: Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was closed for the night. They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien addressed it saying, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader." The gas pump, of course, didn't respond. The younger alien became angry at the lack of response. The older alien said, "I'd calm down if I were you." The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again, there was no response. Pissed at the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said gruffly, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader or I will fire!" The older alien again warned his comrade saying, "You probably don't want to do that! I really think that will make him mad." ”Rubbish,” replied the young alien. He aimed his weapon and opened fire. There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball roared towards him and blew the younger alien off his feet and threw him in a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away into a cactus patch. Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna and looked dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big, green head. "What a ferocious creature!" exclaimed the young, fried alien. "He damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?" The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy friend and replied, "If there's one thing I've learned during my intergalactic travels, you never mess with a guy who can loop his penis over his shoulder twice and t hen stick it in his ear." Those two had already landed on Brighton Beach several weeks before, that dumb young one marched up to a homeless lad sleeping under the Pier and said 'TAKE ME TO YOUR DEALER'! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 Can anyone hand on heart, say they've ever seen these 'two' in the same room? I think they are one and the same person! 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 19 minutes ago, Mr Crabtree said: Those two had already landed on Brighton Beach several weeks before, that dumb young one marched up to a homeless lad sleeping under the Pier and said 'TAKE ME TO YOUR DEALER'! A drug dealer once sold me a brand new pair of trainers, they were really comfortable, gawd knows what he laced them with?, but I was tripping all afternoon! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr H Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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pi3141 Posted September 12 Share Posted September 12 (edited) Edited September 12 by pi3141 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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Mr Crabtree Posted September 13 Share Posted September 13 B EAUTY AND THE BEAST? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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Frankieboy Posted September 13 Share Posted September 13 If Barry White was still alive today he would confuse BLM! RIP Bazza! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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Mr Crabtree Posted September 14 Share Posted September 14 (edited) Edited September 14 by Mr Crabtree Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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