The All Eye Posted February 6 Share Posted February 6 When your mom's thirsty she reaches for a cold can of... 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 6 Share Posted February 6 (edited) 20 hours ago, The All Eye said: When your mom's thirsty she reaches for a cold can of... There's a few deposits for the sperm bank there, make a small deposit now and watch it increase over the next nine months! I wasn't allowed to show my latest idea on Dragons Den, I had the idea to produce condoms with two pounds worth of loose coins in the bottom, on the premise that 'If you can't cum, then at least you can do the decent thing and phone'! Edited February 6 by Mr Crabtree Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 8 Share Posted February 8 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
numnuts Posted February 12 Share Posted February 12 I don't know why this bit of trivia I recently stumbled across made me laugh. It did though, Maybe I am just a bad numnuts. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Helen_Mirren#Personal_life 'In a 2008 interview with GQ, Mirren revealed she was date raped as a student, and had often taken cocaine at parties in her twenties and until the 1980s. She stopped using it after reading that Klaus Barbie made a living from cocaine dealing.' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wingwang Posted February 12 Share Posted February 12 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 12 Share Posted February 12 7 hours ago, wingwang said: You think that this is funny do you? Well I don't! NO, I think it's highly hilarious, has she had the new 'Flat Shovel plastic surgery' that's all the rage at the moment? They pour lighter fluid on your face, light it, let it simmer for a minute or two, then smash the flames out with a large, flat shovel! It's in the early stages yet, although they hit this one a little too hard! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
webtrekker Posted February 12 Share Posted February 12 Off-topic, but someone might be interested ... That image you posted is of an unrolled texture map for a 3D head model. I used a similar image for a Halloween trick. You simply print the image and roll it to fit in a glass or plastic jar and stick it in the fridge. Looks great! 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wingwang Posted February 12 Share Posted February 12 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
webtrekker Posted February 13 Share Posted February 13 23 hours ago, Mr Crabtree said: On 2/12/2023 at 2:25 AM, wingwang said: Expand You think that this is funny do you? Well I don't! NO, I think it's highly hilarious, has she had the new 'Flat Shovel plastic surgery' that's all the rage at the moment? Reminds me of that old song ... Never Hit Your Grandma With A Shovel, It Leaves A Bad Impression On Her Mind! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 17 Share Posted February 17 On 2/12/2023 at 11:19 AM, webtrekker said: Off-topic, but someone might be interested ... That image you posted is of an unrolled texture map for a 3D head model. I used a similar image for a Halloween trick. You simply print the image and roll it to fit in a glass or plastic jar and stick it in the fridge. Looks great! Too good not to give it a go, so I did, and then asked my wife's friend to get me the goat milk out of the fridge! It's really surprising how creative with words someone can get when they suddenly find a decapitated head staring out of a jar just inside the fridge! There was one problem though, my printer had packed up, so I had to use fresh, but, no problem, I've never liked that tosser next door much anyway, and it's so much quieter now he doesn't come home at 03.00 revving that feckin' motorbike! His mother thinks he's pulled a girl somewhere and he'll be back home when he runs out of steam, money, or just gets bored! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 18 Share Posted February 18 (edited) A lady went out for a spin in her new car, two hours later, she rang her husband at home and said 'I'm in trouble'! He said 'calm down, calm down' { he was a Scouser} 'what's happened'? he asked. She said 'I went around a corner down a country lane, and killed a pig standing in the middle of the road, what shall I do'? He said 'is there a ditch at the side of the road'? She said 'No, just lots of bushes' he said 'did anyone see you'? she said 'no' He said 'well drag the pig into the bushes and then phone me back' Five minutes later she rang back and said 'I've done that, just one more small problem now, what do I do with his speed gun and his motorbike'? Edited February 18 by Mr Crabtree 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 21 Share Posted February 21 Reginald D Hunter was talking to someone at a party when another man's name came up in conversation, Reggie said 'Man, he dead'! Some posh nosey cow interrupted and said 'Don't you mean, he died'? Reginald said 'yeah, first he died, now, he dead'! I love this man's humor! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shabbirss Posted February 22 Share Posted February 22 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
screamingeagle Posted February 23 Share Posted February 23 https://www.instagram.com/reel/CoJ10FAjgAL/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alexa Posted February 24 Share Posted February 24 So this is where the Beatles sub got too......... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Crabtree Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaleP Posted March 1 Share Posted March 1 On 2/12/2023 at 10:02 AM, Mr Crabtree said: You think that this is funny do you? Well I don't! NO, I think it's highly hilarious, has she had the new 'Flat Shovel plastic surgery' that's all the rage at the moment? They pour lighter fluid on your face, light it, let it simmer for a minute or two, then smash the flames out with a large, flat shovel! It's in the early stages yet, although they hit this one a little too hard! https://imgur.com/gallery/ln13H70 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaleP Posted March 1 Share Posted March 1 (edited) https://imgur.com/gallery/OYhU7I0 https://imgur.com/gallery/K8Q53Bd Edited March 1 by DaleP 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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