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How did you awaken?


Mr H

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So either to the conspiracy stuff or the spiritual stuff....

 

I ask because recently back in UK. And looking around. I actually think it's quite a rare phenomena for a westerner to wake up to either of these things....

 

We really are outliers in a quite insane world. So I'm.wondering, how did we break free? Why is?

 

Is there a common theme regarding waking up that we can see that we can use to help others? A formula?

 

 

Would be interested to hear your stories because it is actually highly unusual.

 

Happy to share mine. I was actually the last person in the world who would be talking about spiritual stuff. Mentioned before briefly touch on it again. But I had decades of intense suffering, trauma, addiction, abuse you name I experienced it and was saved by some force at the time it got too bad. That was what got me interested in spirituallity - path of intense suffering...

 

On the conspiracy side. I never thought much about these things either. I think it was 9/11 i first heard anything. Then I saw a David Icke live show on TV or internet can't remember. And he was talking about it and explained it in a very convincing way. I thought interesting stuff. 

 

But I was more interested in spiritual stuff so didn't go down any particular rabbit holes...

 

It was only really COVID that got me interested in the conspiracy stuff. This was just witnessed by my own eyes, the madness, to me it seemed like pure evil at work and I was the only one who could see it. Thankfully when I found this forum and started digging into the other stuff.

 

So for me the thread was suffering and witnessing a bloody obvious conspiracy event right in front of my very eyes. I don't know if I would have noticed this and been so fortunate to see it had I not taken Ayahuasca just month prior to.covid, considering I wasn't in the conspiracy circle so to speak at the time. So I'm grateful for that.....

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This is a topic that has been touched on before, From my point of view i think i had a group of friends at the time who had interesting chats about various things including aliens and space. I think the fake moon landing helped my see things differently,then i would watch alot of scifi and had a interest in time travel possibilities. as i got older i could see things were right and with the covid crap my heart told me very strongly that this wasnt right at all. Im not sure what awaken really means,but its clear something isnt right whats really going on is up for debate. I have been trying to be more honest with myself and dealing with my own traumas through meditation and understanding. If this makes any difference who knows but it does seem to help. If we as humanity can survive the crazy times who knows.

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I use to be an arrogant, non-thinking atheist who lazily assumed that atheism was 'scientific'. Then the penny dropped and I started paying more attention to other philosophies, before deciding to develop my own theory.

 

This was back in the early 1990s so I was open minded enough to read David's first book on his awakening. 

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For me it was simple. I knew that something was wrong with me. No other person was needed or youtube. No book, nothing. Apparently I saw everything with my own eyes. I was always pointed in the right direction to detect anomalies of any magnitude. The choice was not mine, I would have preferred to continue to dream..

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45 minutes ago, Ethel said:

It exists in stages.

If this is the case, there must be some who can traverse it. And what no longer corresponds to the fictitious 21st century or backwards doesn't matter either way. I guess it must be a more than strange experience to perceive so many stages at the same time....

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The conspiracy stuff I’ve been working on since a very young age but my spiritual awakening was a little more dramatic. As a child I was an atheist, though I was not a true atheist, I simply declared myself an atheist because I was angry at God. Eventually I decided to the outside world I can say something as crazy as I may believe in God and declared myself agnostic. Then I had my first psychedelic experience and went full pantheist. Now I devote everything in my life to the glory of God.

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23 hours ago, Captainlove said:

Can you explain what you mean by 'It exists in stages'.

 

Certainly. I got into the conspiracy stuff in 2015. I naively assumed that meant I had 'awakened' and that seeing beyond the veil of our society meant I had it all figured out, that I was one of the awakened ones and understood exactly how the world worked, and that I was no longer one of the naive plebs who believe governments exist for the people, etc etc. 

 

I joined this forum in 2020 because, like a lot of people, the 'Covid' debacle deepened my understanding of global conspiracy. I resisted multiple aspects of the scamdemic, including face masks, 'vaccinations', and other components of it; because I understood that these things were not what they seemed and were either mostly or entirely illusory in nature.

 

However, as the entire thing dragged on I began to view the average conspiracy theorists understanding of the world as somewhat reactionary. This deepened because I have never been very good at 'fitting into' groups, in fact, I mostly have sucked at it. Unfortunately, when you 'fit into' a group, you then develop blind spots relative to the ideology of that group, and for me this simply didn't apply because I never fitted in here, or with any other conspiracy type group, or amongst the new agers either. In this forum I mostly see a collection of individuals who belong to various increasingly disenfranchised or demonized groups, i.e. white males, Christians, Conservatives etc, and none of that applied to me either. I am apoltical, non religious and fairly egalatarian in my view of gender, so I am able to see everyone's blind spots quite well.

 

Conspiracy theory has multiple blind spots, and in fact is almost entirely redundant. It's only worthwhile premise is that the PTB in the world are not operating in the best interests of the majority of humanity. That's it. The rest of it is either mostly unnecessary detail, speculative, reactionary, or delusional. I can run through some examples. Icke and many others like to talk about what was "done to" humanity during 2020, whereas I would talk about what humanity did to itself. That's the fundamental difference between me and the average conspiracy theorist. The average person is a child in terms of how they view authority and that is what directly led to the disgusting spectacle of 2020-21. Complete abdication of personal responsibility. 

 

Also, there are aspects to society which even the average conspiracy theorist does not understand. The best example is enculturation. Here is the definition: 

 

"Enculturation is the process by which people learn the dynamics of their surrounding culture and acquire values and norms appropriate or necessary to that culture and its worldviews."

 

Enculturation exists on both a macro and micro level. There exists a certain amount of enculturation on this forum. An example of this would be a leaning towards so-called "alt-right" news sources amongst those in the conspiracy movement. This has almost no value because even those news sources are an extension of state; and pay lip service to the idea that we need a certain amount of authority to sudue our alleged base instincts, which doesn't really work because we have governments and crime exists anyway. 

 

When you enculturate to a group and achieve any semblance of belonging within it that limits further opportunity for awakening. There is a direct correlation between how well you fit into a group and how oblivious you are to it's blind spots, because tribalism is an innate drive. There is a truther 'script', and it belies the fact that much of conspiracy theory is redundant.

 

Perhaps the biggest red flag that conspiracy theory is not as 'awakened' as it purports to be are it's association with reverse false flags, it's high preponderance of 'herders' i.e. people who herd popular opinion in the conspiracy movement, as well as a scripted distrust of things which, in their raw form can actually benefit humanity. I'll give a couple of examples.

 

The first example is anarchy. Some truthers support this but many don't. Those who don't exercise the defence mechanism of denial to defend things like republicanism. In my opinion a person cannot abdicate personal responsibility whilst simultaneously claiming to be "fully" awakened. False power corrupts. How can you hand over your divine personal power to a bunch of opportunistic sociopaths and expect them to give one single fuck about your best interests? You aren't commanding their respect - so why would anyone think governments should respect them? It's insanity.

 

Second, Veganism. I am not Vegan; I consume cow's milk here and there but the misrepresentation of Veganism on this forum is fairly consistent. It alludes to the trendy, millennial version of Veganism; the "fake meat" Veganism which has almost nothing to do with original Veganism of the 70's and 80's, which was essentially a bunch of hippies eating a diet rich in fruit, veg, nuts, seeds, grains, pulses etc. It is straw man fallacy to misrepresent Veganism in that way. Caring about animals and wanting to end needless slaughter contributes towards a more awakened world; but this exists in stages, i.e. Carnivore, Pescatarian, Vegetarian, Vegan, Raw Vegan. 

 

Understanding of global power structure also exists in stages; i.e. at first you see the PTB as evil masterminds, then opportunists who are capitalizing on the fact that most of humanity prefer to exist in a state of sleep whilst abdicating their personal responsibility. 

 

I am not sure how a person cannot understand how awakening is not either/or. Consciousness is continually expanding. You will know more five years from now than you will today. You will understand more five years from now than you do today. You will have more insight, hopefully. There are different levels of consciousness, and unconsciousness.

 

This explanation is not necessarily exhaustive.

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3 hours ago, Ethel said:

 a collection of individuals who belong to various increasingly disenfranchised or demonized groups, i.e. white males, Christians, Conservatives etc, and none of that applied to me either. I am apoltical, non religious and fairly egalatarian in my view of gender, so I am able to see everyone's blind spots quite well.

 

 Icke and many others like to talk about what was "done to" humanity during 2020, whereas I would talk about what humanity did to itself.

 

"Enculturation is the process by which people learn the dynamics of their surrounding culture and acquire values and norms appropriate or necessary to that culture and its worldviews."

 

Second, Veganism. I am not Vegan; I consume cow's milk here and there but the misrepresentation of Veganism on this forum is fairly consistent. It alludes to the trendy, millennial version of Veganism; the "fake meat" Veganism which has almost nothing to do with original Veganism of the 70's and 80's, which was essentially a bunch of hippies eating a diet rich in fruit, veg, nuts, seeds, grains, pulses etc. It is straw man fallacy to misrepresent Veganism in that way. Caring about animals and wanting to end needless slaughter contributes towards a more awakened world; but this exists in stages, i.e. Carnivore, Pescatarian, Vegetarian, Vegan, Raw Vegan.

 

isn't that instructive in itself though that certain demographics are becoming 'increasingly disenfranchised or demonised'? Doesn't that give us some data points as to the nature of the conspiracy?

 

Re humanity doing it to itself by not exercising personal responsibility i would absolutely agree with that and i think that does get discussed here; there's a fair bit of frustration from some at wider society itself for its failure to take responsibility however once again can we consider that there has been a deliberate programme of demoralisation and also de-moral-isation carried out against society over many generations to socially engineer society and if so then isn't exploring that part of understanding what it is we are facing and how we got here?

 

With your enculturation point I am not as blase towards culture as i used to be because i feel that there are practical aspects to culture that root it in the daily realities of certain geographic locales for example if your ancestors developed certain ways of doing things through a process of trial and error and found what was the best thing to do then i would suggest we would be foolish to simply discard it as being some form of cultural programming as if that is a trap of some sort because at the end of the day there are natural laws in this reality that we are bound by

 

With the vegan issue there are a couple of points i'd make. First of all those animals that are kept for their meat or eggs or milk etc would all be destroyed if everyone went vegan as it would no longer be practical for them to exist and also some of them exist on poor land not suitable for planting and as some of them have two stomachs they are better able to process that plant matter into a format that we are able to digest better.

 

Secondly there is clearly a globalist push to stop people eating meat and eggs or drinking milk, let alone raw milk and i suggest that this is because they know this would have a negative impact on health. I do however have sympathies about the suffering of animals and I would like to see things done differently and in a more decentralised way.

Edited by Macnamara
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9/11 and the unravelling narrative, then the Iraq/Dr Kelly thing soon after, made me start to sense something ain't right.

 

Then when the microwave cellphone towers started going up everywhere, and the iPhones came along, I was "unfortunate" enough to be someone who couldn't tolerate them (discovered via exposure to the former and very short-lived use of the latter when given one as a gift) and once I began to discover the sheer level of lies and cover-ups over that, it obviously made me start to "question everything".

 

And then here I was in about 2010.

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I live near and know a lot of 'awake' people. However, they come in many formats and many are quite dogmatic and militant (also angry) that they have all the truths and that every conspiracy they happen to support is the right one.

Those people are immensely frustrating because you simply can't challenge their ideas without an argument, so I don't bother wasting my time.

Most of them are the banking haters generally speaking.

 

The spiritually awakened are much more into forward movement, clearing out their emotional issues and trying to help others awaken. Most ive spoken to have had dreams, or voices or one key event which snapped them into action. Often its one video, or idea which comes at the right moment.

 

I like to drop a few things into a general conversation and see who bites on what. This may be a mix of spiritual experiences or one of the various conspiracies. I don't try to convert anyone. I just listen and try to gently pull them along bit by bit if they show interest.

Start with what piqued their interest and widen the net of knowledge little by little. Allow them to voice anything they may think is crazy without judgement. Some of my own experiences have been so nuts that its easy to disarm folks when they see you speaking truth and putting it out there first.

Then, as forbidden ideas arise, there is usually an example of someone I know who is or has gone through the process in similar fashion to plug them in to. 

The more we talk to each other and broach all the madness around us, the easier it gets.

One thing I have noticed on both sides is the amount of fear people hold on to. Releasing the fear is paramount to folks moving forward. Hanging on to fear of loss in all its formats is what keeps us tied to the control system.

 

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5 hours ago, RobinJ said:

I live near and know a lot of 'awake' people. However, they come in many formats and many are quite dogmatic and militant (also angry) that they have all the truths and that every conspiracy they happen to support is the right one.

Those people are immensely frustrating because you simply can't challenge their ideas without an argument, so I don't bother wasting my time.

Most of them are the banking haters generally speaking.

 

what if those people have legitimate concerns about the bankers?

what if what you perceive to be their anger is in fact their frustration at you trying to invalidate what they know to be true about the bankers? What if they feel like they are being gaslit on that issue?

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On 12/18/2023 at 6:36 AM, Mr H said:

Happy to share mine. I was actually the last person in the world who would be talking about spiritual stuff. Mentioned before briefly touch on it again. But I had decades of intense suffering, trauma, addiction, abuse you name I experienced it and was saved by some force at the time it got too bad. That was what got me interested in spirituallity - path of intense suffering...

 

Do you think that your own journey then has been more of a search for relief from pain?

 

I saw the following headline in the telegraph recently: 'You can't defeat anti-Semitism with conspiracy theories'

 

But why should a journalist concern themself with defeating 'anti-semitism'? Surely the job of a journalist should be to establish objective truth? Should their entire and sole purpose not be to establish what is objectively true regardless of what anyone, including the journalists own subjective views are?

 

What if the objective truth is sometimes painful for us? If our primary goal is in fact to relieve the pain and distress we feel we would then reject that truth for something that sits easier with our ego but then we have stepped off the path of pursuing truth and are on a whole different path

 

One poster in this thread has already lamented that the truth arena seems to be full of white, male conservatives who they don't identify with but what if white, male conservatives are the canary in the coal mine? Did the conspiracy not just try and inject THAT poster with the same mRNA injections that it tried to inject white, male conservatives with?

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2 hours ago, Macnamara said:

 

Do you think that your own journey then has been more of a search for relief from pain?

 

 

 

No not at all. It was triggered by suffering. I was trying to kill myself at the time and something, I still don't know what literally saved me. It also took away all my addiction problems, and depression in that instant and I've never suffered since. Only the normal ups and downs anyone experiences.

 

Before that I thought spiritually was a load of old bollox. But I suffered intensely for couple of decades, and in an instant it was gone after that experience and I couldn't explain it. So I set out to find the truth and that put me on the spiritual journey and is my continual motivation to find the truth about the nature of reality and experience. No other motive...

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16 minutes ago, Mr H said:

No not at all. It was triggered by suffering. I was trying to kill myself at the time and something, I still don't know what literally saved me. It also took away all my addiction problems, and depression in that instant and I've never suffered since. Only the normal ups and downs anyone experiences.

 

Before that I thought spiritually was a load of old bollox. But I suffered intensely for couple of decades, and in an instant it was gone after that experience and I couldn't explain it. So I set out to find the truth and that put me on the spiritual journey and is my continual motivation to find the truth about the nature of reality and experience. No other motive...

 

sure but that set you out on your 'seeking phase'

 

In another thread you said:

 

On 12/18/2023 at 9:23 PM, Mr H said:

I did try literally everything available on the spiritual seeking phase, from the mundane to extreme........

 

But the truth is I only found peace when I stopped seeking and started looking within rather than outside....

 

so you were looking for 'peace'.

 

I'm sure many of us can relate to your experience but i'm just raising a point about all this talk of 'spirituality' especially in the truth arena which is that i believe that there are a lot of people seeking peace as you called it and many are drawn into the new age movement looking for that peace

 

The caution that i'm throwing up here though if we are talking about 'awakening' is that surely what we are trying to awaken to is a no bullshit view of how things ACTUALLY are which may or may not bring us peace

 

I don't think the things that i have discovered have brought me peace. Quite the opposite in fact: they have deeply unsettled me

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Although I can't comment on what you have personally discovered, Mac, I can say that all the folks on the spiritual path ive come across are more peaceful, caring, settled folks with a better attitude. Most are actively trying to create a better place.

I don't think the New Age Movement is the same thing. Its just another misjudged label. I've met plenty of those too, and the vast majority are just hippy types with no purpose. Most are drugged up on weed or other 'natural medicines'.

 

And re the white people labeled right wing, what does it matter how the message gets out or by whom? 

 

I am intrigued regarding why you feel unsettled by any discovery you have made. Is it possible that its because there's personal truth in it that you would rather not recognise? 

I'm starting to wonder if those of us who have seen or witnessed the darker entities,  get them at that point because we are still holding on to dark emotional baggage, and hence, they are attracted to that energy and can use it. Jyst a theory.

I knew a guy in the beginning of my journey who had suffered abuse by his mother, but was also on an awakening journey. He had a very light and very dark side. He just couldn't let go of the dark energy and went around deliberately damaging every female he could find, thus keeping him more tied to his darker self.

I know that for me, pushing past the analytical mind was certainly a challenge, but the most worthwhile thing I did. 

 

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1 hour ago, RobinJ said:

I am intrigued regarding why you feel unsettled by any discovery you have made. Is it possible that its because there's personal truth in it that you would rather not recognise?

 

i found it unsettling to learn that the world is essentially run by dark occultists who are using magic against the general population in order to wage a silent war against them in which we are all on the front line.....the covid era being a prime example where many of us have seen people killed or injured by the covid bioweapons

 

we are against an opponent that injects pregnant mothers so that their children die in the womb. I think anyone who isn't unsettled by that isn't paying attention

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18 hours ago, Macnamara said:

 

sure but that set you out on your 'seeking phase'

 

In another thread you said:

 

 

so you were looking for 'peace'.

 

I'm sure many of us can relate to your experience but i'm just raising a point about all this talk of 'spirituality' especially in the truth arena which is that i believe that there are a lot of people seeking peace as you called it and many are drawn into the new age movement looking for that peace

 

The caution that i'm throwing up here though if we are talking about 'awakening' is that surely what we are trying to awaken to is a no bullshit view of how things ACTUALLY are which may or may not bring us peace

 

I don't think the things that i have discovered have brought me peace. Quite the opposite in fact: they have deeply unsettled me

No. That's an assumption you made that I was looking for peace. I was seeking truth. That was the intention behind the seeking. The effect of the seeking did not bring me peace, only the cessation of seeking.

 

But as we are talking about peace. I would suggest all beings aspire to peace or love.

 

I completely concur with the rest of what you say. And after all my seeking the best explanation of truth I have found proven by actual experience and not bull shit theory is close to the neo Advaita teachings. the reason I subscribe to it is because it is 100% evidence based.

 

That's my findings thus far after a 10 year search. But I'm open to other explanations if there is good evidence for it.

 

Advaita certainly not new age either..one of the oldest traditions..

Edited by Mr H
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@Macnamara there is something to be cautious about though with Advaita and other non dual teaching that I have observed.

 

And this comes from ignorance of the teaching but I have seen it manifest in some people. That is can lead to a sense of nihilism. This happens when people to not go all the way with teaching and just disregard this place as an illusion so nothing matters. What they don't understand is, illusions are real, and that the latter part of the teaching is to bring the understanding we all essentially share the same being, back into the illusiory world - which would end all suffering - because if you realise this, you realise you're hurting yourself. Very similar to."Do unto others as you would have them do unto you"

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Also what we need to be aware of Now days is  the  mk ultra types of  culture creation  and  technology like Pandora and silent sound etc etc that the population may at any time be experimented upon .

So we I suppose i  awaken continually both spiritually but also to the tricks that the psychopathic types have con- jured up   and continue  to spin us .

Because it seems like we've been led astray in past times too down the centuries on and off 

So I suppose my awakening is that too.

Ie how to know what one is experiencing is authentic in itself or affected by forces too.

Even the old mystery schools probably steered people one way or another perhaps depending on the priests etc

Taliesin

meant shining brow so perhaps that is the answer

- awareness 

Which is continuing thing 

the sisters by the well

 

 

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14 minutes ago, Talorgan said:

Also what we need to be aware of Now days is  the  mk ultra types of  culture creation  and  technology like Pandora and silent sound etc etc or the population may at any time be experimented upon .

So we I suppose awaken continually both spiritually but also to the tricks that the psychopathic types have conjured up   and continue to against us to spin us 

 

 

Yes exactly this for me ..

 

The highest truth is the knowledge I AM. That is really what most of the religions are trying to teach. And then abiding as I Am.

 

Then we get relative truths pertaining to the illusion. Uncle Klaus, the banksters etc.

 

We could take the stance, well it's just an illusion so who cares? But the illusion is real and has an experiential effect on us. So it is not something for me to be ignored. But probably not healthy to attach your well being to things that exist in the illusion. True well being is only found in I Am consciousness. Doesn't mean as some people think, don't do anything about it if you practically can.

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3 hours ago, Mr H said:

But as we are talking about peace. I would suggest all beings aspire to peace or love.

 

yes i think most of us do. That's why i said that many of us can probably relate to your experience.

 

I don't particularly want to be wearing the mantle of warrior. I'd rather be a peaceful farmer and me and the missus are working on that. I think quite a lot of us here would like to recreate the shires that tolkien based the 'shire' on! I'm not a natural warrior. I'm more of a worrier! I'm a worrier trying to live as a warrior, which is to say to live deliberately with purpose.

 

But i also know that the people we are up against simply won't leave us alone and this means that they and their schemes and motivations need to be pulled out into the light of day for everyone to see

 

And this is why above i say that i agree that most of us want peace and love. I do think however that there are people who are simply wired up differently. In the modern age we call those people psychopaths and if we are to live in peace we all need to acknowledge their existence and influence so that we can negate their influence. largely this is simply done by saying 'no' to their schemes and demands. I think instead of peace and love, psychopaths want control and power; that's what they get their kicks from and i think they are highly organised.

Edited by Macnamara
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2 hours ago, Mr H said:

@Macnamara there is something to be cautious about though with Advaita and other non dual teaching that I have observed.

 

And this comes from ignorance of the teaching but I have seen it manifest in some people. That is can lead to a sense of nihilism.

 

that sounds like the truther equivalent of being black pilled!

 

there is another danger though which is the identification of the ego with the Self.

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