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How to deal with psychopaths?


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I tried to stand up for myself against a psychopath in my workplace who has been making my life a misery, this backfired. This person is highly educated and they are respected because of this, their work outputs however are not as high as others at their level, they like to have responsibility without doing the work, they are cold, intimidating, manipulative and entirely lacking in empathy, they seem to charm the right people however. Higher management sought to silence me when I spoke about this person's conduct, for some reason this person just gets away with ill treatment of others and never accepts that they are in the wrong, anyone who challenges them is seen as being disrespectful of them. I am now being shunned by other staff, isolated and lacking support. I am trying to get another job but progression in my specialism seems to result in interviews with people connected to this person who maybe don't know what they are really like. I have had a few interviews now, feedback is almost identical each time, along the lines of I'm appointable but someone else was a better fit. 

 

I struggle to maintain my focus, which I need to do until I can move on. My confidence has also been knocked. Any advice on keeping motivated in this situation and successfully moving on is a appreciated. I don't go into detail about what I have been subjected to given this is a public forum, I have not had to deal with someone like this before.  

 

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Sorry to hear that. The amount of people of that type sure seem to be on the rise in this world. You don't get much of anywhere from challenging a psychopath or a narcissist head-on. They love the control, the feel of having everything work out exactly how they want and when they want . And what's worse, is the possibility of the backlash with narcissistic rage.  If their perceived reputation or their flawless image of(just a facade, of course) gets dinged, there's a chance they seek to ruin you, or even drive you to desolation and suicide. 

 

Your best bet could be to simply focus on your work, and you could try avoiding needless contact with the said person. And maybe try to soothe your mind with music while you are off work or something, or hit the gym. Dietary aids might be another crutch you might be interested in looking into while looking for work. Apologies that I'm not that much of help here.

 

 

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3 hours ago, JackJohnson said:

Sorry to hear that. The amount of people of that type sure seem to be on the rise in this world. You don't get much of anywhere from challenging a psychopath or a narcissist head-on. They love the control, the feel of having everything work out exactly how they want and when they want . And what's worse, is the possibility of the backlash with narcissistic rage.  If their perceived reputation or their flawless image of(just a facade, of course) gets dinged, there's a chance they seek to ruin you, or even drive you to desolation and suicide. 

 

Your best bet could be to simply focus on your work, and you could try avoiding needless contact with the said person. And maybe try to soothe your mind with music while you are off work or something, or hit the gym. Dietary aids might be another crutch you might be interested in looking into while looking for work. Apologies that I'm not that much of help here.

 

 

This person almost did drive me to suicide a few years ago. I have noticed that others deal with them by treating them like they are more important than they are, this person likes to be made to feel important and he rewards those who just seem to submit to them. If you please this person they will give you opportunities and more responsibility, otherwise you get treated as I have. I think those who are in their favour may copy their behaviours in future when they are in a similar position, and the cycle continues. 

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1 hour ago, Curious1 said:

This person almost did drive me to suicide a few years ago. I have noticed that others deal with them by treating them like they are more important than they are, this person likes to be made to feel important and he rewards those who just seem to submit to them. If you please this person they will give you opportunities and more responsibility, otherwise you get treated as I have. I think those who are in their favour may copy their behaviours in future when they are in a similar position, and the cycle continues. 

 

 Well I reckon a good few folks would say rise above it and ignore this person etc etc, but from personal experience I would say leave the job and get away from this toxic bastard. You sound like you have been boxed in - not only by the psycho, but by management too,  who very obviously have not addressed your issue. Why give anything of yourself to any person or any company that blatantly couldn't give a shit about you? Get out and find something else - even if its a stepping stone to what you are better suited for. Don't give these life sucking parasites and inch.

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5 hours ago, Curious1 said:

This person almost did drive me to suicide a few years ago. I have noticed that others deal with them by treating them like they are more important than they are, this person likes to be made to feel important and he rewards those who just seem to submit to them. If you please this person they will give you opportunities and more responsibility, otherwise you get treated as I have. I think those who are in their favour may copy their behaviours in future when they are in a similar position, and the cycle continues. 

Sounds like a textbook example of a narc. And it's good to hear that you survived. Keep doing that. That type of "humans" would literally get kicks out of itand laugh out loud about it when alone if you offed yourself.

 

And yeah, sucking up to them, and being meek or making yourself out be lesser than them, does seem to work. How much it's worth though...

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Hi Curious sorry to video dump here was a bit rude of me. I've pmd you a link that might help might be useless to you. 

 

This is a common problem and I had to deal with snakes like this in the workplace so I know how it feels. Unfortunately they seem to be in every facet of our society. 

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