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Understanding how those from the shadows feed from us

steven geldenhuys

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I went to bed last night and told my wife that if I was a betting man, I would bet that I was going to see beings of Love in my sleep state.

One could say that nobody won or lost the bet.


Normally when my eyes close to sleep I start to see the unseen around me. Last night was different. I saw nothing, and then, a few hours later, I felt this funny sensation within my body – as if something was popping alive, especially at my legs area. The movements within got stronger.

Then the dogs barked outside, and I told myself I must get up to see if they are okay. I woke up, sat on the side of the bed, and then stood up to walk towards the door. From there I began to feel dizzy, and then I understood that my physical body was still lying in bed, and it was me the astral form that got up to walk to the door.


We have always known that the astral and body form should be like two peas in a pod – they should be inseparable. This has never been the case – there has never been full communication between the two. On the contrary, the astral and the body are two separate entities, going about their business apart from the other. Why this is so is because of the entities between the astral form and the body form.


The astral came back to the body as the dogs stopped barking, and I fell asleep. Then I saw this fucker with his scissors cutting something within my wife’s head. He saw that I saw him, and then he tapped with his scissors onto me, which was a sarcastic way of saying hello. He cut, and then he inserted something into the space where he cut. What he done to my wife he done to me.


What I gathered from last night’s experience is that the pieces on the chess board are moving. Momentum has been made and things are starting to move. The astral form know it has a best friend, namely the body form. I doubt the astral is aware of the writings of this journal and the big picture, and I say this because when it got up to check on the dogs there was a form of aggression, as in if there is fire outside it will be met with fire. This is not Steven. I do not think of violence as I know if you live by the sword you die by the sword. You think violence and violence you will get.


What comes to me in the night comes to all within Hell – just in different shapes and forms. What they do to me they do to you.

What this Beast with his scissors was doing, was cutting/separating the waveforms of my wife’s and my space. From there, he inserted an entity to play with us. I felt the restriction of the give-receive over the left jugular vein as the inserted entity began its play.


Throughout the journal I have done my best to clarify what it means to be in the silence – the stillness of the heart.

What the stillness is, is you being quiet so that you can listen to your astral form, and equally important, the stillness is the astral form being quiet to listen to the strand within. The way forwards is for these three states to be as one.

What has also being hammered throughout this journal is the importance of breathing with understanding. You breathe in the Love that is, and this places you in the silence/stillness, as this Love you breathe in is within you and nothing else – except the silence. This morning just before I got up, I breathed in this Love within me and all those I Love and all those who Love me. This was done to remove what was implanted within my wife and I during the night. It is so funny – as you breathe in this Love, a thought always pops into the mind to distract you. This thought is from the entities within – they are distracting you so that they may remain within.

What fun and games we play here within Hell!!


There is a shift in awareness and understanding as the separation from Hell begins. Do what you have to do throughout the day, but be quiet within. Give the body and astral and the strand a chance to get to know each other. A thought is from an entity within or without. Trust me when I say that this is the truth. The silence of Love is merely what it is – it has nothing to say as it merely is.


Why do these entities from the shadows, as well as from the seen, possess and attack? For me, it comes back to the ego. They have the upper hand over innocence, which is an expression of the Love within, and this make them feel superior/important.

The games these babies play. When they have nobody to play with besides their own, that is when the playground starts to get ugly. Their fun is turned in an instant into a nightmare. Where did you thing this was all going to you stupid, stupid things? This playground of Steven and the innocent is now closed. Go play with your own.

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“I think; therefore I am.”

Descartes  found that he could not doubt that he himself existed, as he was the one doing the doubting in the first place.

So what we are is what we think, or what we think is what we are.

This is true of Hell and the chaos and misery that plays out here, but in the stillness of Love there is everything and thus no need to follow the chatter of those entities within you that are doing the talking, analyzing and reasoning.

My space is sacred, as it is mine and not yours. And of course this holds true for all of us. The disaster is that like attracts like. You live to survive, rather than live to be, you attract survivors that will do with you as they please to keep their world and themselves intact.

No doubt the first survivor within was the parasitic frequency of Deception. This entity/state was the first voice in our head, and the message was clear: “Take!” Soon all wanted to take, and we infiltrated each other’s space to see what we could get, or take, out of the deal. If there was no deal to be made we took anyway.


Is the first survivor still within us? Does the parasite that we created through our curiosity that manifested into a form within the illusionary Garden still exist within our forms?

With this question I enter the stillness, and what I feel is the moving, palpable flow of this entity throughout our whole forms. It feels like a unity of bands/waves moving up our body. One could say that this frequency band is the foundation on which survivors build their nest when they come to play within us for their own cruel, selfish needs.

To take this platform away by knowing it exists and you wishing it no more within your existence – this is already done now in the moment, but it is what happens after this that matters, as it is through ignorance that the scaffolding will return as fast as it disappeared.

What you and I need is courage – that no matter what, we are always looked after and will only receive what we see as the best for us. You turn to the stillness of the strand of the Creator within, and then you just let go.

Wow, for Steven this is a challenge, as I wanted things to be done yesterday already. I am most impatient.

The proof of the pudding in letting go is that you receive through synchronicity aspects and events that will make you at one with the Creator. Joy and laughter are the other sides of the spectrum of sorrow and despair – you are still within the Game. One looks to a state of oneness with all to be what you are. From here, we elicit moments of wonder and splendor, which is seen through our eyes as joy.

What we are trying to say, is just let go and be. Stop thinking. Think, and the platform of the parasite is built within the moment. Try to stop thinking, and you think of ways to not do this.

Let go and just be. This is the foundation needed for the strand to shine, otherwise you and other entities just get in the way.


I am, therefore I am.

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What one feels from this foundation of stillness is a playfulness of the strand at the location of our throat. There is a moment within the strand that can only be described as playfulness. Imagine yourself playing, in or with whatever. This state that you imagine is what the strand, and ultimately you, is. It is this Joy that is life and the all.

Allow this playfulness of the strand to expand/grow and take you over. Then you are what you are. Then you are Home.

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At this stage of the journal we turn to the hardened, seasoned veteran we call our astral form. This is the realist – the “been there, done that” part of us that has been around the block a few times. To go out and meet fire with fire is not cruel or violent – it is the language that Life understands, and this seasoned veteran knows that.


Ever since my indoctrination into the school system I have had this fear of failing the exams. The one fool-proof dream to implant within Steven is of him failing his exams. That’s Thanksgiving dinner for those who implanted the dream, as the story/tale/dream emitted maximum fear energy from me.


Last night they implanted a fear-of-failing-exams dream. When it was over I turned on my back and said: “Now it is my turn!” I let go of everything so that the Love within may come to the fore and shine. I knew what I am, this strand, and I allowed it to be.

Nothing happened.

So I began to breathe with understanding, filling myself with the Love that is to remove any obstacles within.

Nothing happened.

And then I knew it was the astral form of Steven that was locked in the mode of “doing what I have always done.” There is no time to see the unseen – to see Beasts that control and feed off of us; that make our lives a misery. There is only time for what the astral would call Life – doing what needs to be done to be happy, and this happiness first and foremost involves survival.


Let’s just say, without being unthankful and sounding nasty, that my astral form – I am sorry if I offend – but it has done a really shit job looking after Steven.

I have always had a roof over my head. I have always had food to eat. I have always had clothes to wear and transport to get places, but I have never lived. I have existed, and it has been a pretty shitty one.

Remember, the astral is following the herd – what all astral forms do and have done for thousands of years, if you want to bring the illusionary equation of time into the picture. And also remember, the astral has done its best. It never had a clue to the big picture, until it crosses over to become a Beast, but until then it got on with surviving, and for this we are thankful. But now we would like more. We would like to be what we are, which is the strand of Inherent Goodness/Godness within us, and for this to happen, the astral needs to do what Steven done just over seven years ago – the astral needs to let go of everything it thought it knew or believed in, and from there it needs to start over with a blank slate. Turn to the strand of the Creator at the throat area and allow this force to embrace you to the point where you are the strand, as this is the truth – you are the strand of the Creator, and what you are is Beautiful.

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As long as there is a puncture in the hot-air balloon, it is fair to say that we are going nowhere slowly.


Our miniature Doberman has been avoiding walking on his right hind leg whenever he can for some time now. When I went into his space, I initially felt this immense pain at the neck of the femoral bone. Healing was given, but he is still not right.


When we encounter sudden shock, a surge of energy needs to be made available for our fight or flight response to the shock we have just encountered. This energy is sourced from our bone marrow. I have seen animals where I feel the gaps in their bone marrow, and these literal gaps within their energy field at the level of the bone marrow is from them resourcing the core of their energy to survive within Life. Sudden, or even anticipated fear is a huge consumer of this core energy at our bone marrow.


Obviously I am missing something as Benji is still not right, so this morning while I was still within my sleep state, I went into his space to see what I was missing. What I saw, swimming within the energy field of his bone marrow, was what looked like a small snake with its mouth open. The mouth was open as it was feeding/regulating the core energy stored within our forms at the space we would call our bone marrow. These bone marrow feeders are the cause of the “punctures” within our systems/forms, where we cannot build up enough energy to gain momentum to go forwards – as in set ourselves free from Hell. The bone marrow feeders are there to secure equilibrium within our forms so that we remain attached to Life by the thread of a shoestring.


You see, Steven wishes to be what he is meant to be according to his original birthright from the Source of Infinite Love. Please understand one thing: this state is a NATURAL state. Regardless of how we the biological computer has been manufactured, everything that the cosmic geneticists have done, has been done through unnatural/disharmonious means. We have been held down and kept down to make sure we do not rise up naturally, as this natural state of Love is who and what we are.

What this journal has done is peel away the layers of what is holding us down, and how this has been done is by Steven seeing the unseen. Once a thief is exposed their power is no more. Once a shackle is seen it is understood that Love is bigger than this illusionary device that keeps us within their illusionary prison.


How many times have I said that this journal is complete? How many times have I know that there is nothing more to know, and yet these Beasts still come in the night? As long as I see Beasts within my sleep state, we are still in Hell. There is something more we have to understand.

May these bone marrow feeders be the last that I have had to see to set us free – free from these feeders, and from Life itself. May our energy now build up and gain momentum so that we may naturally rise to be our natural state of omnipotence. 09:49 on 3rd April, 2021.

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I would say that within all of us is an acceptance of self-destruction. That is why so few stand up and “fight” – where we say no to our dominance by nasty, cruel, weak and pathetic bullies. We hope that things will pan out for the better for us, so what we do for the betterment of our lives and those we love is minimal. I am not knocking the species within Hell, as we are all doing our best, but understand that there comes a time when our best is not enough.

When I was touched by the cruelty of Life over seven years ago, as are countless others touched by this cruelty every second of every day, something within me said to myself that I am going nowhere until I understand why Life/people are so cruel. I stopped accepting that Life can do with me as it pleases. If I look back on that time period, if I did not stand up and resist the cruelty of Life, it would have gotten the better of me, and on the physical and astral level I would have fallen and never recovered – I would have thrown in the towel and given in to the cruelty of Life.


If we cannot help ourselves, then how can we help those we Love? – We cannot. I would never have crossed over and become a Beast from the shadows that feed off the innocent. I would have not passed Go and gone directly to the Nothingness of the Forgotten, where Life and Steven forget themselves. You become no more – you drift in a space that is reserved for those than forget the Love within them. This forgetfulness is either intentional or unintentional. Mine would have been intentional.


I am not one for holding up posters and attending rallies. My days of telling adults to behave; to consider those around them is no more, as I am tired of playing policeman to my fellow species.

My resistance to the System of Life is being what I am meant to be – this strand of the Creator within all of us. When you are what you are, there is no need to do or say anything, as your presence ripples through all within and around you, and the System of Life scurries into the hole where it belongs. In these dungeons the seen and unseen Beasts play, away from the Love that you are.


To be what you are, turf the acceptance of your self-destruction. This weight around your neck does not belong to you.

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Yesterday evening before I went to sleep I done something that I have not done before – I reflected on the journal. Put another away: I wanted to cash in on my chips; I needed to understand what impact this journal has had on the frequency of Life within Hell.

There has never been time to reflect as I have pushed to complete this journal, no matter what. I remember times being curled up in a fetal position from sheer exhaustion on a physical, mental and emotional level, saying to myself that I cannot carry on. At the beginning of last year I was a dead man walking. My doctor told me that there was nothing more he could do for me, and when I confirmed with him that I was dying, he said this to be true. You get hit hard enough and long enough and eventually you fall. I saw and smelt those from the shadows, and I felt their warm poison as it coursed through my forms. My forms became immune to their poison, so I lived to see another day.


Reflecting on what has happened since the 3rd February, 2014 when this journal began is a shift within the journal. From that date till now I can be classified as a Loser – that’s with a capital L. I have done nothing but write and look after children, and if I had to be true to myself, this journal has been in the making my whole life. Something within me knew that getting a career to make money would not be enough one day to make me happy. I needed to understand the insanity of Life so that there may be another option to the only one we have ever had, and that was survival. I needed to find a way out  of this mess to an existence where there is peace and Love.


From here on, I no longer see those from the shadows to understand the cruelty of Life – now we reflect on what this journal has brought to the unseen. I cannot transform you, and you cannot transform me – only the unseen can do that. From the very beginning of this journal I understood that whatever was written , it was for the unseen beings of Love that have become trapped within this awful place, as well as for the Beasts of Hell so that they may reflect on what they have come to believe as normal – where you exist at the expense of others.

So last night I closed my eyes to understand what has this journal brought to the unseen. At first I saw nothing – I just smelt the frequency of the Serpent that makes up the essence of Hell. Then I saw a horse walking towards me.

In 2002 I remember waking up one night to the presence of a horse that was merely looking at me. At that stage of my life I was heavily involved in treating horses, so I thought nothing of this vision. My enthusiasm to help the horse was short-lived as I became broken as I witnessed my fellow species break this majestic animal. Years of morbid depression set in as I wanted to help and could help the horse, but I did not have the balls to face the cruelty that these angelic animals endure.


The horse I saw last night was the one I saw in 2002. One of the enigmas of this journal is who is the author. It is not Steven, as I do not have the insight. Semiramis and the Serpent soul within were other possible candidates, but maybe I should have looked to the title (What the Animals Taught me) to understand that the animals, most notably the horse, are the authors of this journal. I just write the words – I am not the source.


I gave myself the cut-off point of this journal when I start to see beings of Love in my sleep state, as well as when my kundalini energy is released. There are those whose kundalini has been released, but do these people know that there is a Serpent soul that resides within them and is one with them? This is your best friend that you never knew existed. I have seen many strange looking creatures that feed off of our energy while we sleep, and I have seen many assassins that come with their preferred method/weapon to destroy, and I have also seen monsters that are what they are – just monsters, but every life-form that crossed over to become a Beast came with its serpent pet. These snakes are one with the entity, be this entity Human in nature or from another world. This serpent pet is the Serpent soul that resided within this entity. The Serpent soul within you loves you more than anything, but like you, it knew of no way out of Hell so it got on surviving. To the entities that cross over to become Beasts, this Serpent soul is then revealed, and the two become inseparable – just as this has always been the case, without you being aware of this.

So the release of my kudalini would be backed by the understanding of what is within, as well as what happened before the beginning of time – to Sophia, Semiramis, and their children. The true release of the kundalini is the awakening of the strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness within you the biological computer, as well as your astral form and the Serpent and Dragon souls that have been a part of your existence for a long, long time. The whole package gets awakened, not just you.


For fucks sakes – may I have seen and done enough to transform the unseen. The answer to this will be known in what the horse shows us.

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  • Grumpy Owl locked this topic
  • 2 weeks later...
Guest Gone Fishing...
On 2/8/2021 at 6:30 PM, rideforever said:

Life is not cruel.

But you can be a stupid person with a mouth too big.

That is only your fault, and it's going to hurt until you become more honest.


On 2/8/2021 at 7:19 PM, steven geldenhuys said:

hi to all


forwarded  the above response to Gareth Icke (the adminstrator of the forum.) i asked him if such a response is acceptable on the David Icke website.


wow! didn't expect that response on a forum and website that stands for making this world a better place for all.


have known from the initial few responses to my posts that the powers that be that have tried to rattle and destroy Icke over the last thirty years have no doubt also infiltrated this forum. we are all entitled to our own opinion, but there is no need to be nasty. life is not cruel. people are cruel. any doubt to that statement, then read the above response to my post.


my question is where are the good people. why is there silence to such a response. 



Hello Steven. 

I've only just stumbled across these 2 posts. 

Gareth is often very busy.

These sorts of issues are dealt with by the Moderators. 

In the future, if anyone posts such abuse can you please report it using the top right drop down option facility..?

Staff cannot be expected to see every single post in every single corner of the forum. 

A Mod will then see it quite quickly and will deal with it. 

That's partly why the Mods are here.


BC  :0)


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