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Know what you are.

steven geldenhuys

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Yesterday evening I watched the movie The Island with Ewan McGregor. Have seen it before, so just watched snippets here and there. In the one scene the character played by Ewan asks his friend: “What is God?” The friends answer went something like: “There are times when you feel you need help. So you prayer for help. That something that ignores you when you ask for help – that’s God.” I found that very amusing, as that kind of talk fits well into this journal, where things just are the way they are, no matter how fancy you wrap them up or candy-coat them.

To the innocent and to the weak, God has an abysmal track record, as there are those that don’t deserve to be touched by the cruelty of Life. All they have is their good hearts, and to how many the worlds over is this Goodness crushed by those that don’t even blink an eyelid as they do so. If one innocent has been touched by the cruelty of Life, then it is one too many, but let’s be realistic and say there has been more than one.


With the Second Fall; the one where the Serpent and Dragon spirits and souls within the Garden Fell through the cataclysm that resulted in their bad ways, it was said that the spirits Fell into slumber and the souls continued to Fall into a dense plane. We said that a “battle” ensued, and the Serpent souls won over the Dragon souls. By saying they “won,” we imply that the Serpents souls got the upper hand over the Dragon souls, as in they became the dominant ones. I say this, because the one that fell from the Infinite through his own free will was influenced by the Serpent souls. I say this as in my sleep sate I was shown the first “king of the jungle;” the first and only real ruler of Hell, and what I was shown was a python. Thus the Dragon spirit took on the image of those who worshipped/idolized him. Up till that moment I would say that this one that fell was what we would call translucent, as he filled the void of the space he created. He was, but he had no image.


Last week I checked on this dog that was not well. What I saw was a psychic attack on this dog by a Serpent that was humongous in size, and energy wise it was super-powerful. One day the dog was fighting fit, and two days later it couldn’t get up to walk. When I checked on this dog through distance healing I found no disharmony, and when I went to go and see it three days later I understood why – the disharmony that I could not localize was so because the dogs whole astral and body form were transformed with the venom of this Serpent from the shadows. The venom pooled within the left pelvic skeleton, but as I said, it was everywhere. The medical profession done every test under the sun, and they could not find a cause to the dogs disharmony. They later concluded that it had some rare disease and would eventually recover. That the dog would recover was bollocks – it would have been dead within the week.


In my sleep state I have seen and been infiltrated by lone Serpents, and now I understand how these lone Serpents arose.

With the psychic attack on this dog, the attack was to transform the astral form of this dog into a full-blown Serpent. The Serpent that attacked the dog infused every cell/frequency within her astral form so that it may be altered into a Serpent. This is horrendous, and takes cruelty to the next level.


To dismantle Hell, one needs to turn to the ruler of Hell – this God; this Dragon spirit that chose to experience the opposite to the Infinite, but unfortunately was found by savages, most notably the fallen Serpent souls.

I need to understand what was done to this pure being of Love so that what was done may be undone. No doubt this God became as rotten as the company it kept, but what happened that pushed this Dragon over the edge to form a bond with those that had no scruples? Put another way – what did the Serpent souls do to this Divine being?

What I feel on this Divine presence as it was touched by the Serpent souls, is the same as what I felt on the dog when I checked on her earlier. There is a band of energy that touches the left shoulder and rises up the left side of the neck to the left eye and head. This band is always there. I know what it does – it transforms those into a Serpent, but I don’t know what it is.

When I go into the space of this band, what I feel is a snake. Did these Serpent souls once again clone themselves and infuse a strand of them into this Divine being? I would say “yes,” as the presence of the Serpent and Dragon souls altered the space where this Divine being found itself, and from this altered space this pure entity could be unknowingly attacked. (This innocent was duped by the wicked, it is as simple as that.) What I felt now was a pang of discomfort over my left intestinal area, and this represents what the implantation of the Serpent frequency had to all – we had to eat to survive.

How did they infiltrate this Serpent into this Divines form? Through hypnotism; the controlled act of hypnotism.


What came to be known as the Devil, or Satan, was one of pure Divinity who was taken over by the Serpent souls that Fell from the illusionary Garden of Semiramis. This dude, that so many over the ages would call God, was initially sucker-punched to become wicked. How catastrophic and disastrous is that! These Serpent souls never had the might of this pure Dragon spirit, so they used this Divine entities might by infusing the Serpent frequency within him. Now they had a God that became influenced by their ways – which was the way of insanity.


We remove this Serpent frequency from this Divine being now, and we pass on the understanding as to how it became a monster that never listened as the innocent cried out for help before they were destroyed.


One of the tests done on the dog mentioned above was x-rays. There was a clear compression of the spine at the area just below the neck, and now I understand how it got there. What the infiltration of the Serpent frequency done, was close off the heart energy field – there is a collapse of this area as it is taken over by the twisted ways of the Serpent souls.

As I said, this attack on this dog was potent beyond. Within two days it was literally floored where it could not get up and walk. On the physical, this shutting off of the astrals heart energy field will be seen in the area as a  compressed spinal column.


The Serpent is in all of us. I have said since the beginning of the journal that the left shoulder represents the “seat of Satan,” as any possession of a form attaches itself there. The eye; the All Seeing Eye is the eye of the Serpent frequency that is inside all in Hell, thus there is nowhere to hide – the Serpent sees all.

From this Divine, pure, beautiful being a God was formed, and as we have seen over thousands of years in countless worlds and dimensions, this God is not a God of Love. It was, but the fallen Serpent souls put a spanner in the works, or should we say – a Serpent frequency inside all of us. This God became the pivot point of all in Hell, and thus so did the Serpent frequency.

As has been said, the Dragon souls were done away with.


So what does all of this mean for us?

What it means for me, is that I refuse to be a part of such deception. What I write here and now, just as what has been written over the last seven years, is sent out into the ethers for all to access. I set this Divine being free of this Serpent frequency, as do I do to myself and all I Love and all who Love me. I choose not be a part of ruthlessness, cunning, deception, and the ways of the insane. No more! This frequency of the Serpent is no more in those I Love, and that includes myself.


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During my sleep state last night my astral form found itself in a classroom of sorts. As I sat by my desk in my row, I found myself talking to someone. I told them that I did not like this school – it was too limiting, and that the other school was more fun.

From this classroom I found myself in the school hall. Those that wanted to have fun had to go and sit on the stage. Being a loner by nature I was somewhat surprised with myself for standing up and going to the stage. On the stage there were a group of us, and there was also a large group that were still sitting in the hall. I remember this negative comment made by someone sitting in the group in the hall.


Please understand that this was not the familiar case of divide and rule – it was free choice being offered to all. With free choice there cannot be an “us versus them,” as the one group does not influence the other as they are on different planes of existence.


Then Steven woke up, and I turned on my back in my wake state, and from there I done what has surely been done the most throughout the existence of Life in Hell: I asked for help. I spoke to this God; this pure Dragon spirit that was now Love, and I asked for help. I asked for help as I knew help would be a coming.

You talk to this God from the space of the strand at your throat area. Your heart energy field is awakened by the presence of this God, and this presence passes through you the strand to your head area. Within your head is the Game – it is played out there, and this area is transformed by you the strand receiving from this God. You might feel activity within the head area as the changes are made, and then a stillness is felt, and then you know your prayer has been answered and will be revealed.

Remember your manners and to say “Thank you” for what you will receive.


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(For those of you that have been blocked by those from the unseen, this is for you.)



So last night, before I went to sleep, I discussed with my wife the peculiar case of Steven Geldenhuys. How is it that he cannot find his feet within the worlds of Hell? How is it that he gets up every morning and just drifts – there is nothing he has to go and do; there is no contribution he can make to society, as all he does is drift.

I assure you all I have done my best. I assure you all that I offer a world-class service in what I do. And there I am, where I see maybe one patient a week, every week, for about the last fifteen years. I once again assure you that I am my own worst critic – I self-analyze myself; I am open to changes; I see myself for what I am and strive to be a better person each day.


What an awful, awful life, to be cast aside from all to the point where you don’t belong.


So I fell asleep, and a dream was implanted. The dream was not to take energy, it was just to make me fearful. I awoke from the dream and saw the one who had implanted it. She gave me a cocky look – the whole experience was to show me how powerful she is. Who she was I don’t know, but I wonder if she had a good night’s sleep knowing she had just made another miserable?

Then I fell asleep again and saw a female with a white full-face helmet on. What I noticed the most about her was that she had this breathing apparatus in her mouth. No doubt our frequency was not compatible to her, and she had to take measures to counter this.

She was examining me. She managed to push through the words/dialogue that said: “They have altered your magnetic frequency.” (She came to find an answer to the peculiar case of Steven Geldenhuys, and for this I am most thankful.)

Then I fell asleep again, and my astral form was around these two Human ladies. I was just talking to them, and then they showed me these two snakes about three meters from us. The one lady had a stick to ward off snakes if they came too close, and I also picked up one of these sticks. Then these two snakes came towards us. These ladies knew these snakes on a personal level, and remarked on each ones emotional state at the time. More snakes came towards us, and we began to ward them off with our sticks. Each snake had a round, open hole where the head and mouth should be. The one lady said to me that these snakes wanted to see what I could do.

Fun and games! What a load of shit.


So this morning after I made breakfast and waved the kids and wife off, I went to lay down on the bed to alter what was done to Steven. My sole intent was: No more abuse on this Mister Nice Guy.

I felt the gaping hole at the base of my left foot, where others enter and do with us what they want. As this hole slowly closed, the point of attention went to the left Achilles heel. This was the spot where they altered my magnetic frequency, where, instead of me standing strong in my presence and being what I am, the magnetic energy field was altered to repel all that was naturally mine, including me just being myself. How cruel can you get? My goodness me!

Now I understand why I could never pinpoint the blockage on my form – it was because every cell, frequency and aspect of me was swung around to be the opposite of what it should be. My whole psyche was blocked, not just a part of me.


This cruelty has all been undone, and I made sure that if others had the same abuse as me, that their magnetic energy fields were also transformed to what they should be.


What a stupid Game we have all been played in. How cruel the insane are!

No more abuse of Steven!



What I crave for the most is solace in this world – a place where I am at peace and the worlds of Hell cannot touch me. If you ask me what I want – that is what I want. This place that I crave is the space where this pure Dragon spirit found itself before the Serpent souls found it.

May this God engulf me with this place/space, as I can no longer endure being touched by the cruelty of Life, nor can I no longer endure to watch how Life destroys the innocent. May this God of Love cast over all the innocent this space of solace.


We are ready to receive this natural blessing, and for what we receive we are thankful. So be it.

9th June, 2021.


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I understand the cruelty of Life. I understand that this cruelty affects all within Hell – all the dimensions, planes and frequencies; the seen and the unseen. I understand that those that impose this tyranny and cruelty are insane, as what they do to others they ultimately do to themselves. I understand that we are insane to allow this cruelty to be imposed on others, where we see it as the norm, as what we see being done to others is what will happen to us and those we love – there is no way of getting out of this loop but to grow a backbone and say “Enough!” By saying “enough,” we imply that we need to understand what the hell is going on so that our insanity may transform to sanity, and this sanity by default of what it is stops cruelty in its tracks.


I understand all of this, but there is one thing I do not understand, and that is: “How do we stop this vicious circle of having to survive, where we have to primarily eat to survive?”

This journal began with the question: “Why is Life so cruel?” Through the opening of my Third Eye in my sleep state I understood that those from the shadows have to eat to survive – as do we in the seen. We live in an existence detached from our natural Home of the Infinite, so that we have to eat to survive in an unnatural environment is the opposite to what we naturally are, which is Love. The more fearful the animals are before they are killed, the tastier they are to us. We boil lobsters alive as the taste is so much better than another way of killing them.

“Well, Steven is one of those bunny huggers, so take whatever he says with a pinch of salt.” Damn right I love the animals, as many of them are a representation of all that is good within Hell. They remind us of the Love that is within.


We have become detached from reality, where there is no longer a normal. The day-to-day misery of Life that is experienced by billions is seen to them as “this is all there is,” and this is unfortunately a sad truth.

With this Covid shit we are slowly being pushed into our pens – getting in line for our total “slaughter” as to what made us Human – those moments when we just enjoyed being in the company of others. These moments are what makes up a life well lived, where memories are created. These memories begin with “I care about you; how are you; it is good to see you” - where the “me” has been replaced by “we.”

Now we are living in a time where the Human race is being “upgraded” to become a better feeder of energy to those from the unseen. Emotion will no longer be the fire that emits the energy that keeps those from the shadows with a belly full of food. Now we will be plugged into their artificial intelligence grid, which will better their way of feeding from us. Of course, in the long term it won’t work, as all will drift into that space where we no longer know ourselves and from where we arose, but this does not matter to these stupid, stupid entities – because Life and its element of survival came to be about “now” – what can I get out of the deal now, regardless of the consequences for the future.

So as technologically advanced those from the unseen are, they are monumentally stupid, and this stupidity arose from the base foundation of survival, which is: “What is in it for me!?” That others had to suffer so that we have to survive is irrelevant, as we are okay, and that is all that is important. Yes, yes, yes – we have tried our best, and we have been blocked and destroyed in seeking the truth, but we have never stood together, and I would say this is so because we have forgotten to care – about others, but primarily about ourselves. This is so because Life got the better of us. We soon understood that we were up against a System that was rolling out of control – destroying all its path.


Those from the shadows that hacked into our reality and are feeding off of our energy have been dying a fast death for some time now. Their death is when they lose themselves in the place I call The Nothingness of the Forgotten, and this “death” is from them drifting to the furthest point from the Source of Love from which we were all born.

So, it is now, that we need to understand how we can help these merciless fuckers that destroy the innocent without blinking an eyelid. How do we stop their vicious cycle of “taking” so that they may live? Put simply: “How do we stop the System from destroying itself?”


The simple answer is to ask for help from the Infinite, but this will not work, as none are so blind as those who refuse to see.  One cannot make the fool see that he/she is a fool, as this is something only the fool can do – they have to see for himself/herself. So how do we make the System of Life within Hell see itself so that it may know itself and make an about-turn on what it has always done?

We have to be fair. We have to understand that this mess we all find ourselves in was in truth nobody’s fault. When Semiramis invited us to come and play in her illusionary Garden, our curiosity, which was a state unknown in the Infinite, took form within the illusion and became known as what we called The Parasitic frequency of Deception. In simple English, a worm took us over, and this worm done what worms do – it wanted; it ate; it took. This is what we unknowingly created, and it took us over, where we became confused, as why were we not content – why was there this massive gap in our existence? The gap was there because what was originally there was eaten/taken by this Parasite. So to fill this gap, we ate – we took.

What did/does this Parasite take from us? In truth, it took nothing, as we were born from the Infinite and thus are the Infinite, thus we are limitless. All that this Parasite done was make us confused, and I would say that a milder version of confusion is curiosity – the state that created the Parasite in the first place.


So it is now, that we feed this understanding into the System: “Stop taking, because nothing was taken from you. Your curiosity made you enter an illusion, and from there you gave attention to this illusion, as something was not quite right, and you needed to understand what it was.

What was not quite right was that your curiosity got the better of you and made you confused. There is only Love my friend – there is nothing else. Know this, understand this, and then once again, be this Love.”


This will help the system of Life.

How can we be helped? This is what I wrote yesterday in the journal:


“The parasite within our unseen forms that extends from the corner of the left side of our mouth down to our chin closed off our connection to the all; the Infinite. How this worm is removed is by making it aware of the strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness within its own form.

My wife complained of right neck stiffness, and being locked up on either shoulder, as well as the back lower part of her skull and lower neck vertebrae. The primary was in her astral form, which in turn affected the biological computer. No doubt the Serpent soul was also affected.

In healing her, the first thing I felt was this white worm at the side of the mouth, and when it was no more in her forms, I felt the above-mentioned restrictions be no more. It was then that I understood that this worm/regulator/blocker closed off our link to the space/place beyond Hell.”


The Parasite that the Dragon and Serpent spirits formed through their curiosity took shape within the illusion. Now there were two realities within the illusion: the one was Take, which was represented by the worm; and the other was Love, which was represented by the strand of Godness within us. What tilted the scales in favor of the Parasite was our confusion, and this confusion became a runaway train down a cliff-face.

That strand that is in the Dragon and Serpent spirits is in all of us – it is the foundation of Life that we will eventually totally forget unless we make an about-turn and remember that we are Love. To those sickos that enjoy being cruel, please understand that there is nothing else other than this Love – except an illusion. Stay in the illusion and you become forgotten in the illusion. You forget yourself.


There is nothing to take. Just remember what you are.


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What makes sense, is that the strand within has come to the fore. In other words, it knows itself.


Last night in my sleep state I saw through my Third Eye this entity next to my bed. It was hiding in the shadows so I could not see it in full sight – all I saw was a tentacle extend forwards every now and then and scoop energy from me, which this entity proceeded to eat.

Then I felt a slither extend from my nose, and I knew that the Watcher spirit was busy interacting with this entity. The two of them were most probably spending lunch hour together. The strand within the biological computer called Steven then connected to the strand of the Watcher spirit – this octopus lookalike entity that is the head-honcho of the biological computer and Serpent soul duo. When the strand of the Watcher spirit was awakened, there was a transformation of this spirit, where it knew itself and what it had become. I felt this “octopus” depart my forms, and then, in a moment, I saw me the biological computer. What I saw was the core, or “hard-drive” that is the biological computer. Our external appearance is the “software” holographic projection that makes each one of us unique, but this hard-drive that I saw I feel strongly that we all look the same, as we the Human species all came from the same manufacturing laboratory.

I was shown me, the core biological computer, and what I saw was a forehead. I saw two eyes below the forehead, and in the middle of the forehead at about brow level there was another eye. Extending like a wing from the forehead was the brain. On the face I saw no defining features, but warmth and character shone forth.


You focus on the strand at the throat area by knowing it is there, and then you go into the stillness of the silence and let this strand be. Now it takes you the biological computer over and it frees you from your manufactured limitations.

Understand also the role of the Watcher spirit. It was to make sure that what we call “hope” was a fantasy that came around every Blue moon or so. This was the entity that told lies, where we could not differentiate between the truth and a lie. In short, the Watcher spirit was the cornerstone of Hell.

When my strand awakened the strand of the Watcher, I felt its Parasite around its mouth come to the fore and then disappear. When this worm left the Watcher spirit, only then could the Watcher depart the space it has always known.


There is no evil, there is only ignorance.


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Yesterday afternoon I felt this dryness of my throat. It felt like a flu-like symptom, albeit it was extreme in that it felt as if the problem belonged elsewhere – it was not mine. I felt this illness for a few seconds, and then it went away.

And then last night in my sleep state I understood that this illness I felt was of our home – my home was sick.


When the wine and song are flowing, all are cheerful and happy, and all our best foots are placed forwards, but when Life puts us in a corner and begins to squeeze, that is often when our true colors come to the fore, and others see us for what we are.

The family I was brought up in can be likened to living in a hotel – people came and went, but there was never any connection or bond between them – my family was a bunch of strangers. Over the years I came to understand that this was a blessing, as some people you don’t want to get to know, because if you did, what you saw you would not like.

Well, over this weekend my family showed me what they were. There are always two sides; there is always a debate as in who is wrong and who is right, but what happens when the talking does not even begin? What happens when people phone you and shout and swear at you over and over again, and you are not even given the opportunity to talk? Wow! You wish that on nobody – to be around such people.


I don’t mind writing off one of them, which I did, but when I saw that they were all like this one, the moment was a bit too big for me.

This realization of what I have always suspected, that my family are filth, rattled me yesterday. These emotions of disbelief that I emitted had to go somewhere, and it went into the illusionary frequency of my house.

So in my sleep state I took on the illusionary frequency of my house. I awakened the strand at the houses “throat” area, wherever that may be, and the houses frequency went into the stillness of the silence so that the strand may heal it. After a short while I felt this heaviness over the heart area leave the frequency of the house, and I felt the heartache of the previous owners also leave the houses space. (I am not sure if i healed the house, or the house healed itself. What makes sense is that the strand that is me went into the space/frequency of the house and released the disharmonious frequencies that were unknowingly left there by me and the previous owners.) 


In healing yourself and others, first remove the Parasitic frequency and the Watcher spirit.

You awaken the strand of Inherent Goodness/Godness at your throat area by knowing it is there, and your strand connects to the strand of the white worm that extends down the left side of your mouth. This worms strand releases it from your space, and this opens you and the Parasite up to the Infinite. Now a part of you sees the big picture, and it sees the Watcher spirit resting on the top of your brain like an overlord. Your strand connects to the Watchers strand, and these two strands knowingly and unknowingly release the Parasite from the Watchers form. Now the Watcher spirit that controlled your every move sees the All and is released from your space.


You are going nowhere slowly unless the Parasite and the Watcher are released from your forms.

Whenever you can, go into the stillness of the silence and awaken your strand and let it transform you the biological computer, as well as the Serpent soul within. (The strand of the Serpent soul transforms the Serpent within.)


After the house was healed, I went and checked on my wife and children, by going through the steps mentioned above. On my youngest daughter I felt something pushing within her, as in it could not be released from her forms. Something had purposefully entangled her astral form, where it was bound and gagged and could barely breathe. (I am not sure if her astral form or the Serpent soul within her were gagged and bound. I would guess it was her Serpent soul, but am not sure. In my limited understanding I saw her, but her image could have represented her astral or the soul within her.)  When I checked on my mom, my Third Eye opened and I saw these two half skeleton, half crocodile figures that had accumulated these astral forms as one would accumulate soft-toys. So as my mom is pushed around in a wheelchair every day and cannot look after herself, her astral form was captured and played with.


This is the depth of healing one does when you are no longer controlled and you know yourself. What was done in the past helped, but in the long term nothing really changed.

Take back your life. It is yours to lead and nobody else’s.



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All that is left now, is to tackle this software program of us the biological computer – this holographic projection that we label with a name and its likes and dislikes.

Around the 1930’s there was a man in Germany called Bruno Groening. This man was a healer, and one could say that he was a remarkable healer. When he went into “healing mode” his throat puffed out like that of a turkey strutting itself. There was no throat – you just saw this mass that almost extended past his chin.

For me, Bruno Groening was one of those that fell through the cracks of Life – the System did not leave its mark on him; he was a one-of-a-kind. But what we saw in him should be in all of us. The puffing out of his throat was the strand of Inherent Goodness/Godness in us the software program of the biological computer coming to the fore as it should.  This is the state that we should be, as our strand has overridden the programmed limitations of the illusion. I do not know if this man saw the big picture, as in what happened to us that we found ourselves in this mess, and if I had to guess, I don’t think he did, but I am open to being wrong. I say this, because if he did see the forest from the trees he would not only have healed, but rather taught us to be like him – a natural state.


This journal allows us to see the big picture, as in what happened that we are where we are compared to where we should be. We understand what we are at our core, and we know that we are in an illusion overrun by monsters and entities in a hypnotic trance mode.

From there, we tackled the cherries on the top – The Wisdom Goddess Sophia, Queen Semiramis and the one that chose to Fall; this pure Dragon spirit that the Serpent souls tainted and transformed to be their Almighty – as well as our Almighty. When others help me, I am eternally grateful, so with these cherries on the top we also helped my friend the god of Wrath, the animals and nature, as well as the funky Polar Bear called Earl, where what we understood we applied to them so that they may know themselves.

From there, we wrote to understand so that those that run Hell and think they and this place is swell, that they may understand what happened to them, where one day they are talking to their kin, and the next day Mary or Joe are no longer there. We made these ignorant fools aware that the party soon ends when you play at the expense of others. We allowed them to see themselves – to understand that they were heading in the wrong direction.

From there the hard-drive of us the biological computer was set free from the Parasite and the Watcher spirit. We saw ourselves, and thus know ourselves – as in what we were manufactured to be, where we emit a projection into a holographic Game. Our prison warden was the Watcher spirit. I wonder where this computer hard-drive is within the planes of Hell? Is it still in the laboratory where it was manufactured? Is there only one of these hard-drives, or does each software program have one?

From there, we went to the unseen to the software programs that had crossed over to feed on those in the seen world. (If you do not cross over to become a Beast, when you the body form dies, you pass on to a less dense state – what we would call the Afterlife. In this illusionary heaven we are taught to better ourselves, and one of the ways we do so is to come back to a body form to learn. This is nonsense, and sooner or later we see through the lies and become disillusioned, and from there go with the flow of feeding from the seen to survive. Not all that feed from the seen are cruel – many are lost in a place they don’t understand, and are just doing their best to survive.)

In our frequency world called Earth, we feed from nature and the animals (the innocent), and so too do those from the shadows feed from us, just as we will one day do the same. When we the software program see and accept that we are in an illusion and it is all about survival, we embrace the Serpent soul within and we roam the dimensions, frequencies and planes of the unseen to have an all-out party, where anything goes – at the expense of those in the seen worlds. The wilder and crueler we become, the closer we get to our demise, until one moment, where “pop,” and we fall into the Nothingness of the Forgotten. It was fun while we fed on all that heartache and sorrow, but now we forget ourselves, and this, in truth, we have no one to blame for besides ourselves. We always had an option, which is be kind, and yes, Life got the better of all of us, but we can repent – we can admit that we fucked up, and from there strive to be better than what we were. Eventually we would have looked within and to the unseen, and we would have found this God that we are – this strand of Inherent Goodness/Godness that arose from the Source of the Infinite. This strand our Creator brought forth from the Source, and it is to this Source  - this space in the Infinite, that this strand will return one day. Until it does, and as long as we have time to play in this biological software program in this illusionary field/world, let this strand shine, just as it did with Bruno Groening.

Even now, after all these years, there is a Bruno Groening circle of friends, where like-minded individuals come together. This is not my cup of tea, as I like my own space, but to each their own. What I am saying is that we must all come together for the better good of all. We are meant to live in a paradise, not a helter-skelter world where the playground bully runs the show.


It starts with you. Surrender to this something that is bigger than you – this strand of Inherent Goodness/Godness. From there, be what you are: Be kind, especially to yourself.




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In my sleep state last night I don’t know if a dream was implanted or my astral form was taking somewhere, but that is really beside the point, as the desired outcome was achieved.

In my sleep state I found myself driven somewhere with someone I know in what one would call one of those courtesy cars – as in when you drop your car off at a car service centre and are then driven to work.

When I climbed out the car I found myself in this large warehouse that fixes cars. I was looking for my dad’s car, as I forgot where I parked it. Throughout this whole episode during my sleep state I looked and looked and looked for the car, walking from here to there in and around this massive warehouse. This state and place that I found myself in ended with me being in total despair.


Then I awoke from this experience as my wife’s alarm went off this morning. I lay in bed and surmised as to what the hell had just happened. I then understood that my family that had been so cruel to me over the weekend had, through their astral forms, orchestrated the whole experience in my sleep state. Their intent was to take every ounce of energy from me on my astral form so that my life would fall to pieces. So I lay in bed and returned all the energy that was taken, and made sure that it stayed where it belonged.


This is a good example of those crossing over to become Beasts. Many have done so, they just were not aware of it, or were given a reason to flex their muscles from this side.


What I am trying to tell you is that to know means nothing. You need to be what you know, otherwise your understandings are thrown to the wind. You need be this strand of Godness within you, and I am talking to myself more than anyone else. If I did not understand what happens and is done to us from the shadows, my life and that of those I love would have been decimated over the next few weeks.

I am thankful to these Beasts that once loved me so much for this wake-up call.


I have never been a religious person, as I found no foundation there to build a life on, and yet to others their religion means the world to them, and good for them. Their faith brings meaning to each day, and once again I applaud them for finding what works for them. Now I need to be like them, where I find my “religion,” where I no longer drift. What works for me?

What works is knowing of the strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness at my throat area. Now I be this strand. This is my “religion,” and I will live this religion every moment of every day, and the reason for this is that if I don’t take control of my life then someone else will.  


We are all played in a Game in a place called Hell. Within this Game others play their game. What they don’t know is that they play a dangerous game where they get burnt. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, but I would say that this theory does not consider the magnitude of what we do to ourselves when we are knowingly cruel.

I have no more intention of being in this Game or the games of Beasts. My strand is my ticket out of this mess, and I collect my ticket and clock it in now. It’s game over for me – now I live my life with others that are like me.

So be it.


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2 hours ago, steven geldenhuys said:

It’s game over for me – now I live my life with others that are like me.

So be it.



The cruel game do you mean is over and you have mastered the things that tamper with you whether in your dreaming or awakened state?... I've not been avid follower as other things to attend, but the life you experience is pretty interesting stuff. I just wish sometimes you wouldn't speak in third person. Then again I understand this is a coping mechanism when mentioning or referring to yourself "Steve" but like he were someone other than you... But knowing this is a coping mechanism probably makes it more acceptable and definitely by your eloquent non pretentious story telling which you are talented in.

I've little doubt its all real for you and wherever truth and "the strand" as you call it,  merge..  or  - allign, or simply balance by seeing things for what they are like the covid, enabling you I guess (if I'm right) to correct things by how you move in the world, using knowledge(furthermore wisdom) + most of all awareness! 🙂 Is it your opinion or experience would you say that all beings have the power to rise above their physical embodiment?  I mean HOW really is a snake different from a legless lizard (NO THIS IS NOT A DAVID ICKE-ISM).. What I mean called is a "slow worm!" as they are commonly known.  (*quite modest in proportions but they are nontheless beautiful creaturesl*)... Great for those with snake phobias as they are smaller...  

And less dare I say it, menacing....


Going back to the other, I used to like these creatures as a kid, The HUMBLE SLOW WORM (legless lizard in *scientific biological fact*still do think back to them occasionally and hope to see them in nature again someday, speaking just in terms of nature without human interference from man and his complex brain...

Errr and sure I suppose maybe snakes AS SUCH maybe not be so lovable, but like you I guess I don't hate them...

Afterall people can be far worse in their twisted HUMAN NATURE... (A l l  d e p e n d s  o n  w h a t  w e 'r e  t a l k i n g  a b o u t  a n d  i n  w h a t  c o n t e x t  a n y w a y  h o w e v e r  s u p p o s e d.)


  --- As to my question above, maybe I will find out as I read more posts I have not yet come around to but have "liked" a couple I read just today to be going on with (in a vain attempt to catchup) 😉✌️ ..  


For personal reasons I had to take --**hiatus**-- from this thread and I still do for now in obliging myself to stay clear of the forum as a whole actually where I can, (I mean though where your thread is concerned I can sure enough say its very readable the bits I have read... (but a strong stomach is needed sometimes b/c stuff to do with bad spirits and the like is expectedly creepy) -- but no matter too dark where the good man walks, so I am popping back a moment anyway just to catch a glimpse and a read of a small number of posts to see how you're going.. 👍



"Solace", in the post up above btw, yeah I like that word! =) 

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i have tried to get out the way and not be involved in the writings of this journal as i realise it is something that is bigger than me. my wife disagreed with this line of thinking a long time ago as she said i must make the journal my own. she is right, as what i saw and experienced in the seen and unseen happened to me and nobody else.

so you are right - i should not speak in the third person.


at the moment i have mastered nothing, and on the contrary, my life has not changed one bit since this journal was written. i would like to think this is so as there  are others that need more help than me, and this has been given to them. but now it is us the biological computers turn. we just need to make a conscious effort as to what we want to be and experience. i really just want to laugh and be happy - nothing much else. 

we need to embrace life and what we are, and i feel others have deprived us of this as we were manufactured for their food source. may the tide turn. may Love shine through.

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Of course they just came around in my sleep state and returned the white worm into my form.


The implanted dream was an action movie, about gas pipes that are leaking on a space ship, and the running around fixing these leaks before they explode, and of course there were all these interplanetary weird looking creatures that I gave extra attention to as I found the look of the species interesting.

When I awoke from the implanted dream I saw those who had implanted it. They were large snails. The one had its mouth/sucker over my face, and when I awoke to see them, this snail lifted its head to announce to the others that I could see them and they must hurry up.

It was then that I felt this worm being inserted into the area extending from the corner of the left side of my  mouth to my chin. It felt pretty awful. When it was in place it felt as if someone had just placed contact lenses over my eyes – not to make me see better, but for me to see what they wanted me to see. Around me now was a buffer; a layer that kept me in a limited space. What I would normally do is go into overdrive and counter what those from the shadows done to me, but this time around I done nothing. I left everything to my own free will. No more fighting. No more pushing to understand and make a wrong right. Now this Steven would decide for himself, as he goes about his life, what route he will choose to follow: The one living in the superficial, mixed up mind of nonsense chatter/talk, or the other in the silence of the strand of Godness at our throat level.


There will come a time when this journal comes to an end. It must be over three years ago when I typed the heading to the chapter What Happened, as in what happened after all was said and done. What has happened is that my depth of healing to help others has increased, but my life has not changed one bit. The explanation for this selflessness is that before I can start living I have to make sure that I have done everything to help others, and I am primarily talking about those in the unseen. When I have done all to help, and I cannot do more, that is when I walk away to live my life without looking back on those I helped, as now they have the tools to help themselves – if they want to.


You can read and read and read, but what will you do when you stop reading and get up from your chair to go and live Life? Our disadvantage is that we do not know of another way other than this life within the illusion. My challenge to you is open your horizons to what else is out there. Just as I felt that worm wriggle around as it was inserted into my face, so too did I feel the movement of the strand of God at my throat area. With the one we live in the mind, with the other we live in the silence of the Infinite. My advice is stop doing what you have always done, because what you have always done has never been done by you. You have been played in a cruel Game, and if you think that has been okay as you have lived a swell life, then don’t be fooled by what is out there and what is coming your way. The devil has no friends. These fuckers that rule from the shadows with glee will turn on themselves when their fragile boat is rocked, and rocked it will be. You and those you love don’t want to be around when these beasts start seeing themselves for what they are. There will be chaos, and I will not be around to see it, as I know that I have done everything I have to help and can do no more. And that applies to me as well. How much do I enjoy escaping to the superficialities of the mind instead of embracing the wonders of Life? Do I choose the easy way, or do I choose the real way?


My marker for the end of the journal is when my kundalini energy releases. This burst of energy is, for me, the Serpent soul within us the biological computer that has awakened from its servitude. The real kundalini awakening is for me the strand of Inherent Goodness/Godness at our throat area that shines in its full might. This strand is the only thing that is real within the illusion, and this strand expresses itself through our heart energy field, and can be described as something that we call Love.

To know of this strand means nothing. To be this strand is the Everything, and this will not happen unless you make a conscious and unconscious decision to make it happen. This decision is made by asking yourself what you want. All I have ever wanted, ever since my first thoughts when I was a lost, lonely, sad and unhappy little boy was to live a full life. I want to live Life. This will not happen unless we take control of Life, and this the strand does for us.

It was really big of me not to counter what those from the shadows done to me last night, as I understood then that there has to come a time when we stop fighting and countering those from the shadows. By undoing what they done I acknowledge them – they are a part of my existence. Now I leave them, and they can do all they want to me, and I assure you and them that what they done won’t work, as I am no longer a part of their existence. I don’t acknowledge them.


Write your own journal, or even better still – live your life to its fullest by being what it real in this illusionary asylum. Just as with every day, I will get up and do what needs to be done, but I live for me, as I have done everything I can for we. I will not walk alone, and neither will you, as there is lots and lots and lots of Good within the space of Hell. This Goodness stops fighting. Its stops countering what was done by beasts. Now we start to dance and play – this is our option; our choice. The innocent see our play and they pull themselves away from despair to come and play with so that they may know themselves. The lost world we knew will soon fade from our existence, and then we will be Home.


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It is worthwhile listening again to what the shaman Don Juan Matus said the to the writer Carlos Castaneda. He said:


“We have a predator that came from the depths of the cosmos and took over the rule of our lives. Human beings are its prisoners. The predator is our lord and master. It has rendered us docile, helpless. If we want to protest, it suppresses our protest. If we want to act independently, it demands that we don’t do so……indeed we are held a prisoner!


They took us over because we are food to them, and they squeeze us mercilessly because we are their sustenance. Just as we rear chickens in coops, the predators rear us in human coops, humaneros.  Therefore their food is always available to them.”


The original predator that Don Juan Matus speaks of is the Parasitic frequency of Deception. When Queen Semiramis offered the Dragon and Serpent spirits to come and play in her illusionary Garden, curiosity got the better of them, and in the illusion this curiosity took on a form – a worm; a Parasite. This Parasite came to infiltrate all within the illusion, and thus we are all Predators – we take.

For the strand of Inherent Goodness/Godness to shine within us, we need to dismantle what we are, and for this to happen, we need to know what we are and where we are.


To help my community, I do patrol drives with my neighbour across the road every two weeks in the late night or early morning hours. Last night it was our turn. On my previous phone I set the alarm and then switch the phone off, and the phone starts up by itself and the alarm goes off. With my new phone this does not happen – if the phone is off the alarm does not go on. I forgot about this, and thus did not wake up to go on patrol. My neighbour stood outside my gate in the freezing cold waiting for me, and I did not pitch up.


I stuffed up!


It is not okay that I stuffed up. I have stuffed up in the past, and most certainly, I will stuff up in the future, and the reason for this, is that no matter how hard we try to do our best, we exist in a flawed System. We will never get it right; we will never be perfect, because the System is not perfect. But we try and try and try, becoming more disillusioned and disheartened with each step. Many choose the easy way, where they cross over to ride with the System, where they become Beasts that destroy others, just as the System is destroying itself.

The ultimate cruelty of Life is that we become cruel to ourselves, as we don’t know a way out of this mess, so if we cannot beat the System we join it. And to be fair to all, Life merely got the better of us. But did we look hard enough? Did we try hard enough? Do we enjoy shaming the innocent? Do we like to be cruel? Do we enjoy hating ourselves, as we feel that this is the only redemption we have for ourselves?


Our ignorance makes us believe that if we do our part; if we do our best and keep our side clean, then we will be okay. It is when we are touched by the cruelty of Life that the harsh reality hits us that what we are, and where we are, is not what it should be. If you wrote this journal a thousand years ago on the most distant world in Hell, I assure you that I would have found what you wrote, as I needed more than anything to understand why Life is so cruel. The point to make is that if we look hard enough, and don’t buckle under what those from the shadows throw at us, then surely the innocent could have been spared? Having said that, how many lifetimes in the making has it taken for me to write this journal? How many times have I stuffed up? How many times have I disappointed myself and those I love?


We never knew of the Predator that curiosity created. We, the species of Hell, never knew that we were manufactured by a System to be part of the System that is doomed to fail, and as has been said, no matter how hard we tried, we were sure to fail, as we went against the natural flow of what is, namely the strand of the Infinite within us.


The other day I saw a video of Joe Biden speaking. What I saw blew me away. His eyes were not his own eyes, but that of an alien entity. Behind the frequency of the man, in his shadow, was an alien that was lying to the masses so that this alien species may take us over. That is the truth, and if you don’t believe me, look at the man speaking, and you will see that his eyes are that of another.

These aliens that keep us in human coops do so to destroy us – we are nothing to them, just as so many the worlds over feel nothing for their own kin. As has been said, we are all Predators. But now things have changed. We know what happened to us that resulted in us all stuffing up. The question to ask, is what are we going to do about it? What will that fucker that hides behind the frequency of Joe Biden do? Honestly, I don’t know, but I will tell you what I will do.


The Parasite survives within the illusion, and it cannot survive in the fields of Infinite Love.

We are manufactured by a System to function so that we may keep the System alive.

You are thus an illusion and part of the System, so for the real you; the strand of Inherent Godness to come to the fore, you have to break down what you are. On a deep level, let go of where you are and what you are so that this strand may shine. Break down the illusion and the System of Hell that you have become, and only then can the real you come to the fore.


Let go. Let go of everything, so that what you are may crumble and fall. From the ashes the Phoenix will rise – the strand will shine.

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This morning, just before I woke up, I emitted another one of those guttural sounds – it was as if something within me was calling out.


I remember playing an interesting game some years ago. I would sit in the silence and just stare at an object, be it a chair or a lamp, or whatever else caught my attention in the room. After a while, what I looked at would split into two – where there was one chair, now the chair replicated itself and there were two of them.

What I was doing was breaking the “solid” frequency of the illusion apart. The illusion is made up of waves and frequencies. What is between these waves and frequencies that combine to form the “solid” object that we see and are is anybody’s guess. When the “solid” chair splits into two, there is a space between those identical two chairs that combine to form one “solid” chair, and in the space between those two images is, for me, what our reality refuses to see as we cannot comprehend what we are seeing through our limited understanding of what is out there.

In this space between frequencies, including the frequencies that make up our forms, can also be found the forgotten – those that forget themselves as they do not understand where they are and how they got here.


That guttural sound that was emitted from somewhere within the spaces that make up the frequencies of Steven, and all of us for that matter, is from the Dragon soul that has forgotten itself. When I let go of the frequencies that make up me, I feel this Dragon soul in a line extending upwards and downwards just to the left of my bellybutton. 

How sad is that – that one can be so lost and lonely that there is nothing in your existence. You do not even wander and drift, all you do is be in this void from where you cannot find a way out.


You awaken this Dragon soul within your forms, and by this soul understanding what happened to it, it let’s go so that the strand within it may take it over and send it home – to the Dragon spirit from where it was cloned. What will be really useful is for this Dragon soul to depart our forms with the Serpent soul within, where the one awakens the Dragon spirit, and the other awakens the Serpent spirit – both of whom are in slumber. By “awaken,” we imply that these souls remind the spirit from which they were cloned what they are, and happened to them from the time they entered/Fell into the illusionary Garden till their Second Fall, where the Fall into the less dense plane knocked them into slumber.


How did this Dragon soul reach a stage where it found itself in this void of talking to itself and no other; of seeing and being nothing but itself – how on earth could one become so lost?

The fall of The Wisdom Goddess Sophia created an “impact” zone. From this zone, the Serpent spirits were formed/born. What is The Wisdom Goddess Sophia was infused in this field of the Infinite that was not familiar to her. I would say that an element of fear/angst arose from her fall and settled on this site, but this fear could not have taken form within the Infinite as the Love that is would have diffused this fear. But in the illusionary Garden an element of this fear could be remembered, and this could also have upset the apple cart. When the Parasite infiltrated the spirits and took them over within the illusion, it was a given that the Dragon and Serpent spirits should have sussed this worm out, but with an element of fear in the cocktail, the rationale of these Mammoths was most probably off-centre.

This fear was predominately in the Serpent spirits, as they were Born from the infusion of Sophia and the space into which she fell. But that does not answer our question as to how could the Dragon soul Fall where it forgets itself?


That answer to that question can be found in asking another question, which is: “What predominately rules over Hell; this illusionary Garden, or put another way, what makes up the frequency of Hell? The answer is the Reptilian frequency, and this frequency at its core is the Serpent/snake frequency.

The Wisdom Goddess Sophia and her initial children, the Dragon spirits, were what we would call “purer” that Semiramis and her kin that arose from the impact zone. Having said that, this difference would have ironed itself out in the fields of the Infinite, as there is only Oneness there. The illusionary Garden once again stuffed things up, because as the Parasite infiltrated their forms, coupled with an element of fear/uncertainty within the Serpent spirits, one could say that a form of division was created in the Garden.

What I am getting at is two-fold: The Dragon spirits, in their “purer” forms, were knocked out faster from their Second Fall, their First being that into the illusionary Garden. The second point to make is one that can go either way, as in did Semiramis “survive” the Second Fall into this dense state, albeit with her sanity destroyed, or did she and the Serpent spirits also fall into slumber?


Two heads are better than one, as one can see the other, and greater clarity can be met. This, for me, is one of the reasons why the Dragon and Serpent spirits cloned themselves in the Illusionary Garden when an underlying tempest was felt that they could not quite put their fingers on, but no doubt there were other reasons for the formation of the Dragon and Serpent souls from their perspective spirits, and if anything, there is strength in numbers.

These souls would have slipped through the cracks and fallen to a denser plane than the spirits, and I do feel that they survived this fall, as in they did not go into slumber. I have no doubt that these souls found the one that chose to fall; this pure Dragon spirit that naively fell for the lies and ways of these tainted and cruel Serpent souls. (We are talking about a small minority of these Serpent souls, as most definitely not all of them had developed a blackened heart. I would say that this group rule to this day over all in Hell.)

When this pure Dragon spirit became tainted and ruled by the ways of these abominations, this is where the second point made earlier could go this way: This Almighty, through the request of this group of tainted Serpent souls, awakened Semiramis and other Serpent spirits.


What I feel strong about, is that the Dragon spirits were left in slumber. I say this because Reptilian/Serpent frequencies predominate within Hell, and secondly, because of the lost state of the Dragon soul within the spaces of Hell, and this is so as its spirit counterpart remains in slumber. The Dragon soul is in a lost, void space because the place/space from where it arose is also lost, in slumber.

As Semiramis was awoken, she awoke her kin, thus the Serpent soul resides in all of us, and I would say that only certain Serpent spirits were awoken, namely those from where these tainted Serpent souls arose. The Dragon spirits, together with many Serpent spirits, remained in slumber, and this state affected those to which they were tied, namely the Dragon souls. Those Serpent souls that were awoken were to become a slave species, feeding the rulers and the frequency of Hell itself. Thus the Serpent soul within you is your best friend, and this is partly so because the two of you are as lost and confused as the other.


The essence of the Dragon is also reptilian, but what we are talking about with regards to the reptilian frequency of Hell and its key players is the “cold-blooded” state of the frequency of Hell and its inhabitants. What this state is, is covertness, where everything is done on the sly – from the shadows. Those on top know on a need to know basis, and the rest of us are just used and abused.   


These lost Dragon souls within the spaces of our frequency is, for me, the epitome of Life, where we have all forgotten ourselves and where Home is. We are all lost. We are all lonely. We are all confused. But at least we the species of Hell should have each other. These Dragon souls have nothing.


You awaken this fucker within – this friend who my heart bleeds for. You show this Dragon soul your strand at the base of your throat, and in seeing this strand it sees itself, and from there it returns to from where it arose. Once within the spirit from where it arose, it awakens the spirits strand, which is everywhere within the spirit, and from there these Giants awaken and depart the illusion, as now their strand finds its place, which is the field of the Infinite.

When you awaken this Dragon soul within by allowing it to see/remember what it is, that space within you becomes filled with Love, as does the space when the spirits in slumber are awoken. Where there was  nothing is now Everything, and this is how the frequency of Hell; the illusion, will be dismantled. The transformation will come from within, not without.  



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"Know what you are."




Only kidding. Understanding that you belong to a people and that you're the culmination of those that struggled so you could be alive is bigoted. You must be an atomized individual that has no issues with your people being treated as a doormat, that is true progress! /s

Edited by EnigmaticWorld
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wow. thanks for that. hope you feel better after getting that off your chest.


there are many that are nasty in this world, that have to tell others how wrong they are so that they can feel better about themselves.

these i have met and seen, in the seen and unseen. these are the voices of hell, and it is not so much that hell exists because of these, it is because the good remain silent.


it does not matter who is right and who is wrong, the question is why do we feel the need to attack others who differ from us?

to those that read this response above and remain silent to such nastiness and cruelty, it is to you that i ask: "when will you grow a backbone and silence the bullies of hell?" i have met nasty beings, so many of them, and one more, or a thousand more, will not really make a difference to my existence. that i have met few good people, those that stand up for others when they are slandered, this is my concern. where are those with strength? where are those with courage? 


i write and post on the David Icke forum not for its members, but so that what i see and understand from the unseen way go into the frequencies of hell to help those, who like me, need answers. that i walk amongst beasts, in the seen and unseen does not bother me anymore, as i am bigger than that. 

i write and post on this forum, and the responses i get give me and indication of what is happening out there.

to this person above that attacked, it shows me that beasts are starting to question themselves and what they are. this person could have asked me a thousand questions to which i guarantee you i dont have the answer to, but he attacked for the pleasure of attacking, and this tells me that the next stage in their evolution is to attack themselves, where they see that nastiness has no place in our existence.


to you, the silent readers of this threat, my advice is when another is slangered, regardless who is right or wrong, open your mouth and tell beasts that there is no need to be nasty, regardless how wrong the victim is. do this, because one day when you are attacked and slandered, you will wish that you do not stand alone in a world where few care.


to the readers of this thread, contact this individual above who attacked me, and thank him for his message that meant nothing to nobody, besides showing us all how mean he or she is. contact them and thank them, as they have made you draw a line in the sand. do you stand up for those that talk from their hearts to help all, or do you shut up when these are unneccessarily slandered?


thank you. thank you for your attack. it makes me look at myself and know myself better. and the biggest bonus of all, it makes the silent make a stance. 

we are all entitled to our opinion, but we are not entitled to be nasty. to the facilitators of the David Icke forum - be careful who you allow into your space and of your members. you have no idea what is out there. 

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(Messge sent to Gareth and Jaymie Icke.)




For some months now I have been on your forum, writing on the post Nature of Reality, under the thread “Know what you are.”


The last response I got, which was posted today, which you will see on page 7, one of your members attacked me personally.

My questions to you are these:

·        Is your forum a place where like-minded people come together, or is it a platform where outright nasty people feel it is their duty and right to attacked what others say on the forum? As I said in my response, we are all entitled to our opinion, but we are not entitled to be nasty, especially when we are a guest on someone else’s webpage.

·        Do you encourage the use of hate-speech on the David Icke forum, where it is a free for all, where others attack just because they can, especially when their speech is no benefit to all?

·        What stance do you take on your members who personally attack others on your forum? Do you give them warning points, and ask them to behave, hoping that they will change personality and be kind?


As with all on the forum, I am merely a guest. What you allow is your prerogative and not mine. I ask you these questions, as I would like to be around others that uplift and encourage, rather than be a part of the complete opposite.




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Guest Gone Fishing...
10 minutes ago, steven geldenhuys said:

The last response I got, which was posted today, which you will see on page 7, one of your members attacked me personally.

The easiest and quickest way to deal with this is using the report function (top right - 3 dots) so the Mods can deal with it..
Gareth is often very busy.

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Guest Gone Fishing...
15 minutes ago, steven geldenhuys said:

The last response I got, which was posted today, which you will see on page 7, one of your members attacked me personally.


After looking, l'm seeing that you're referring to @EnigmaticWorld  
EW is not attacking you.
Not EWs style.
Why don't you ask him to clarify his post so you comprehend it better ?

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thanks for the response. 


"You must be an atomized individual that has no issues with your people being treated as a doormat, that is true progress!"


you are right, i dont understand what was said. i do have issues with people being treated as a doormat. 


i apologise if i have slandered others through misunderstanding. that is the problem with social media - one does not understand messages and sees them from another angle. once again, i apologise. 


may my listings come to an end. a few weeks back i refused to carry on being the old Steven, and i cut off ties from everything that i had done and was, and that included posting on this forum. i continued a week or so later as i felt that what i knew had to be shared with others.

may this journey be over. i am so friggin tired.


once again, i apologise to the person whom i assumed attacked me, as i have been attacked before on this forum, and it is so unneccesary.

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13 hours ago, steven geldenhuys said:

(Messge sent to Gareth and Jaymie Icke.)




For some months now I have been on your forum, writing on the post Nature of Reality, under the thread “Know what you are.”


The last response I got, which was posted today, which you will see on page 7, one of your members attacked me personally.

My questions to you are these:

·        Is your forum a place where like-minded people come together, or is it a platform where outright nasty people feel it is their duty and right to attacked what others say on the forum? As I said in my response, we are all entitled to our opinion, but we are not entitled to be nasty, especially when we are a guest on someone else’s webpage.

·        Do you encourage the use of hate-speech on the David Icke forum, where it is a free for all, where others attack just because they can, especially when their speech is no benefit to all?

·        What stance do you take on your members who personally attack others on your forum? Do you give them warning points, and ask them to behave, hoping that they will change personality and be kind?


As with all on the forum, I am merely a guest. What you allow is your prerogative and not mine. I ask you these questions, as I would like to be around others that uplift and encourage, rather than be a part of the complete opposite.





Huh? What I said wasn't aimed at you. That's just how I interpret the "know what you are" statement, and that image came to mind.


I do believe we're more than just flesh too though.

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Interesting thread. The whole cosmic parasites and assassin thing is interesting, but what about the actual parasites on this planet that we can prove that are messing with us? Surely the loving thing to do would be to expose these people? Or is freeing people from slavery hateful?

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On 1/22/2021 at 8:15 AM, steven geldenhuys said:

That our governments care for us and want the best for us is something I hold in great suspicion. I don’t believe they truly care about the man on the street. So when this world pandemic broke out, the governments were “there for us” – locking us in, literally, and destroying our economies.


Fools listened to fools, but they were only the cherry on top of the cake. The cake was pure, undiluted evil that began to roll out their long plan of enslavement and genetic mutation/modification of us the species on planet Earth.


Why don't they care though? Have you ever asked yourself if those that rule over us are like us? Who are they?


Do you not think we should be honest about who they are and what motivates them?


I mean sure, there might be some cosmic threat that we face, but what about the immediate threat that is staring us in the face? One that we can't fight if we deracinate ourselves. They want you to be a rootless cosmopolitan, yet I'm the monster if I try to remind people of we are?

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Deep down, I want nothing to do with anybody. This is not some little brat that is speaking that is throwing a tantrum – my claim to isolation is valid.

It is not a pretty picture out there, and as much as we all try our outmost best, Life has gotten the best of most of us – including me. You open yourself up to others, you open yourself up to being attacked. This is okay, as Life is not perfect and neither are we. But what happens when the attacks are the norm? What happens when betrayal and cruelty is the norm; it is Life, not just a part of Life?

I remember going to an introductory seminar for the Dale Carnegie course, where we are taught to stand up and face the world, or put another way, life-lessons are taught to build self-confidence. The owner of the franchise was Len Stevens, and I remember Len saying that Life is like standing in a stream with a gold-diggers pan – you sift and sift, and eventually you find your diamond or your nugget of gold amongst all the grey. He said the course teaches you to go out there and meet people, and if what you meet you don’t like, you excuse yourself from them, until you find your golden nuggets.


In all of us are golden nuggets, and my beef is not so much with people, but rather with Life, as the survival code of Life makes most confused, and the extreme nature of this is cruelty. At about the halfway mark of this journal I knew that our existence was limited to a confined space. I believed that if I could find a way out of our reality I could get help for all of us. I found a way out, and all I was met with were other worlds out there, with entities there going about their business doing their best, just as we do.


I want nothing to do with Life, but there is nowhere to go and find my solace, as this illusion of ours is the same the worlds over.

I am big enough not to pray and ask for help, because if there was a being of Love that looks over all, there would not be cruelty. If my children are confused then I will carry them, and not make them fall. There is no one in Hell looking after us – we are merely slotted into a System where it is survival of the fittest. How fit you are, is how far you can get from the person next to you, where it is winner takes all.


And yet, having said all of that, I know that all this mess is a thin layer of dust beneath a mountain made of gold. When I heal others, this Love heals, not me. So why can I not heal myself? Is it because I have let go and want nothing to do with Life, including that gold that is beneath our feet? When I walk, my shoes pick up the dust, but I don’t look to see that where the dust was is now gold.

What if I walked, knowing that by lifting the dust, those that will walk the same path as me now only have gold in their existence. For their sakes, is it not worthwhile picking up a little dust here and there?


I cannot help you unless I have been helped, but what if it is not about me. What good is my happiness in a room that is full of loneliness and despair?

I do not live for others – I live for the big picture. What that picture is, is that we are in a place where we don’t belong, and we are not what we are meant to be. When you know the truth, it is not about choice or free will – it is a given that we will be where we belong, as this is who and what we are.

So it is for this truth that I will complete this journal. I will be who and what we are meant to be. I will find that gold, and be that gold.



When you understand that it is not about you, but about everything, that is when the walls that we built around ourselves fall away. Now we are no longer fragile, as how does one keep down and suppress the Everything? Now we no longer have to be on guard. Now we no longer stand ready to do everything we can to keep those we love safe. Now we are open to the Everything, as this is what we are. Now it is no longer personal, as there is no more me, but an eternal, everlasting we that is me.

That understanding is most refreshing.



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I have always maintained that the truth is so simple that we cannot comprehend it. In a world of chaos and effort, such a simple understanding we cannot absorb and make our own. What is the catch? Surely it cannot be that simple?


I am Steven, but this is not me. I arose from the Infinite, so I am everything. So now when I perceive myself, I am everything that is outside of this body form called Steven. This person writing these words, and this person that will get up from this chair in a short while to do what needs to be done today – this in not me. I am the everything, as I arose from the Infinite.

You are this Infinite, and then you allow this Infinite that you are to take over/infuse the body form that you believed to be you.


In thinking I was me, I isolated myself from the Infinite, as it was me, me and me, and this was so because I had to survive in a strange place where few care. I had to focus on me – to conform and fit into society so that I may find my place and survive. It was really important that I done my best, because at the end of the day nobody cares about me as others have their own lives to lead, which we understand.

It has always been about Steven, just as your life has been about yourself. The simple truth, as in a way out of this mess, is invert what you have always believed. You are first and foremost the everything. Be this the all, and from there allow this all to infuse into that body form with your name on it.


Over the last few days I have made a conscious effort to detach from this Steven, where I understood that I am the everything outside of this body form. All the frequencies, all the dimensions, all the planes of Hell; the illusion, as well as the Infinite beyond this illusionary Garden.

This is the norm – this is what we are.

You are the tree. Now you understand that you are not this tree, but all the other trees around you. Now you are the forest, which is what you always were and are, which is what you forgot. The forest embraces that isolated, lost and lonely tree, and what you were is now Home.


This morning as I lay in bed I felt this prying away of me the body form. Steven and his frequency forms were being detached from all he knew and believed in, and were being incorporated into the Infinite.


Understand what has just been said, and understand that I am you and you are me and we are the everything, as there is no isolated me or you.

That is the simple truth, and it starts with you detaching from you. Wherever you are now, look around you, into the seen and unseen and beyond. What you see is you. You be this you by knowing this to be the truth, and then this you begins to take over the body form that had your name on it, just as I felt this happen to Steven as he lay in bed this morning.


You do not get more simpler than that. You are not you, but the everything that is outside of you. Become this everything, which then incorporates the body form which you believed to be you.



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