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Know what you are.

steven geldenhuys

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A good ten years ago received a reading from Carol Clarke who resides in Wales. The first thing Carol told me was that I have been blocked.

If I paste a sticker on your back and you are not aware of me doing so, there is no ways you will ever know what I done to you, because you don’t know me and what my intent with you was. Our vision has been too restricted for us to note what the unseen done to us the biological computer.


But Consciousness sees and knows all. By allowing this state to flow within me, I could feel and understand what Carol was talking about all those years ago, and in knowing what was done to me, it could be undone in the moment. The deviousness and cruelty from those in the unseen was bad, where they made sure we remain in misery, knowing there will be a time when we lose all hope and become broken.


Allow this state of Consciousness to flow within you the biological computer to remove all blockages that have been imposed upon you. And from there continue to all this Consciousness to flow within you. It will only be a matter of time before our imposed programmes will be taken over by this state.

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Angela helps us by cleaning our house three times a week. She is a Beautiful person with a heart of gold – one not made for the madness of our world.

She looked after our house one weekend, and I thought it would be a treat for her staying elsewhere other than where she stays.

She didn’t like it, because where she stays with her husband and two children is one room, and that’s it – nothing but one single room, with a communal toilet and bathroom somewhere else on the property they share with others. This is all she needs and wants, so is happy. Our house is too big for her, so she doesn’t like staying here, and nor do her children.


The spin from the ignorant within the spirit realm was that the spirit uses the biological computer to learn Life lessons and correct mistakes made in past lifetimes so that the spirit may “grow” and be closer to whatever oversees the unseen and seen realms.

The disaster with this bullshit story is we were thrown into the pot with all and sundry, where you had to learn to swim fast lest you fall by the wayside. Many of us never made the cut and drifted through Life, never finding ourselves and where we belong. As if this was not bad enough, we met some really bad hombres along the way that added insult to injury – a good stomping here and there so that they may feel good about themselves, seeing the trash that you are and the importance of what they are.


What I am trying to say is that so many of us are in a place where we don’t belong, be it a home, work, or relationship. There are those that are content, and blessed are they, but as for me, I have never belonged.

Earlier on when I asked for something that I longed/wished for – something that I have been wishing for a long time, I felt a blockage at my heart energy field, as in everything that came my way that was me could not penetrate my frequency form. What was mine – as in who and what I am to complete me and make me a rounded person – these frequencies gravitated towards me, only to make an immediate U-turn when they hit my heart area. Then I felt a prick on my right index finger, as in something was injected into my waveform there, and from there I experienced the strangest thing. Have you ever seen a video of a sand-shark? All you see is the sand of the ocean floor, and then there is a wriggle and commotion, and the shark reveals itself from the camouflage of the ocean floors sand. As I felt the prick on my right index finger, I felt this flat creature wriggle itself so that its presence was known at my heart/chest area. Its presence was not so much known but rather exposed and caught out. This creature was injected into my waveform (what we will see in our limited vision as a solid body form) so that it may block all that I was from coming my way so that I may be a rounded person. In other words, what I naturally am, as in what I naturally attract towards myself, never happened, and this was so from foul play from those in the unseen.


Angela is content in a room, as this is all she needs and wants, her priority being her children are well and looked after and are happy. The children part I share with Angela, but the room part I don’t. What is me is a beautifully designed architectural manor with a beautiful garden, where both are wrapped around peace and privacy. That’s me. I am not better or worse than anyone else – this is merely who I am.

The blockage never allowed that to happen. To make sure this creature remained within to block me so that I may lose hope and fall sooner than later, two finger down from the right index finger this initial blockage was sealed there, as in making a double knot to make sure the seal won’t be broken.


In allowing Consciousness to shine forth as it naturally should, from the heart through the throat and into the head, this blockage was removed, and I will receive what I naturally am in this frequency, but there is something else that needs to be addressed, and this comes back to finding ourselves in a situation where we don’t belong, be it home, work or a relationship or whatever else.


That you are where you are and don’t belong there will bother you, regardless of what Consciousness and the Infinite are doing. You need to understand this, and from there you need to get out from where you are to where you belong. Don’t try and rise above a bad situation, because you won’t because you cannot, because you don’t belong there. We have moved past the bullshit story from the spirit realm, so in this reality let’s see where we are and ask ourselves if we are happy where we find ourselves. If you are not, don’t stay and try and make sense of it, or even better still, live in the stillness of the silence of the Infinite because you cannot because you are where you don’t belong. Until we are so less dense that we can morph between places, let’s be realistic and go where we belong.

What this normally is, is where there are like-minded people like you. I can stay in the penthouse suite at The Ritz, but if the people there don’t share the same integrity and self-respect as I do, I won’t be happy.


Through all of that, the message is don’t fool yourself that the Infinite is flowing through you, and blockages from foul play have been removed, and now you will make the best of where you are. Don’t do that. Walk away to where you belong, and how this is done is to allow Consciousness to lead the way. Go to where you belong. You will be led there, and how this is done is by you being opened now to this understanding.

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(When you are where you belong, be it in a moment with loved ones or hearing a bird sing, in that moment you allow the flow of the Infinite up through the neck to the head and from there to engulf you, and this allows Consciousness to amplify the pace to where you belong in other spheres of your existence.)


The question we have to ask, and it’s an important one, is what do we know about the illusion?


A week or so back over two nights the sex programme was amplified within me. I held out, and as I closed my eyes to sleep I saw what looked like a vacuum cleaner sucking device. This was the System; the illusion, waiting to suck up the energy that is emitted during sexual intercourse.

Last night as I was sleeping I felt like a pack of cards that someone shuffled in haste. They found the card they looked for – the implanted dream programme – and from there someone pressed “enter” on the programme. In the implanted dream, which was about 20 seconds long, there was a man antagonizing me. I walked over to punch him in the face (this is not me.) What startled me was that as I swung my fists I could not hit his face.

The implanted dream programme was over, and from there my Third Eye opened to see this young girl sitting next to me on the side of the bed. She must have been about twelve years old. Her lips were pursed and sucking, as if she was sucking up liquid through a straw.

She was sucking up my energy that accumulated from me following her implanted dream program. This young, bright, sweet looking girl was oblivious of me, as in I didn’t exist – she gave me the attention one would to a plate on which your food is served, which is no attention.


What do we know about the illusion?


The last thing I was shown during my sleep state last night was a bird’s eye view of someone lying on the floor in a room in a house. Next to them was a huge snake. I saw how this snake slithered away from this person and left the room.

I am sitting here writing these words because I became immune to the  Serpents venom, otherwise I would have been a goner.


What we know about the illusion is that it is Home to the Serpent – the ones who have embraced the Reptilian frequency of the illusion and made it their own. I write “Home” in a capital letter because I believe that this place is all they want to know – they have no interest in anything else. Sure, they know the illusion is not real, and there is something better and real beyond this false veil, but they like it here and that’s about it.


What I was shown last night during my sleep state was a super-highway in front of me with many lanes. This highway was not for cars but for people. It was empty, and I took an off-ramp looking for a phone booth. There was a coin in my pocket and I wanted to call my mother as I had not spoken to her for some time.

Then I had the knowing that I was going to university to study the psyche of others. The image of myself was one of depth and professionalism – what I saw was someone from beyond worlds, and what I saw was not a representation of me, but all who wish to ride the highway out of the illusion.


We don’t belong here – this House of the Serpent.


Yesterday was a super-productive day – I saw two patients! (That’s funny and sad.) The one dog I drove out to see, and while talking to the owner I told her that I do the energy therapy where I heal the spirit and body. She mentioned that she had an addiction that ran in the family, and I offered to remove this disharmony. When I went into her energy space I found nothing, so what one does is zoom out and follow the family line in the seen and unseen realms to find the origin of the disharmony. When this was done I felt this static band about the size of a child’s hand about one inch away from the brain. The presence of this frequency band amplified that spot of the brain, where as an example you and I might crave a chocolate, but this lady had to have one at all costs.

This crap was removed and I know she will be okay.

Why I mention this case is because we all have to start zooming out and seeing the big picture, which is we don’t belong here. This is not our Home, and I am talking to you the biological computer with your name and job title, mine being Steven with the job title of Loser. (Funny, sad and true.)


Stay here and you will get fucked up. Don’t mess with these Serpents – they are on Home ground and they will destroy. Besides, leave them be as they are happy.


Allow Consciousness to take you Home where you belong, in this realm, and from there to beyond the illusion.


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My wife has been complaining of pain in her feet for some time now. When she gets up from sitting the pain is there. Whatever I done to help didn’t work.

So if you fiddle and nothing works, then you stand back and look.


With the Infinite flowing from the heart space up through the neck to the head, and from there engulfing me the body form, I asked to observe what was going on in the life of my wife. What is critical is one observes and nothing else – no interference, merely an observation.


On the frequency level a large rotating circle appears over your forehead, and from there you begin to observe that which you called forth. The observation is what is, in other words, all that is unknown to the subject is laid bare. You feel more what is there rather than see, and what I felt and partly saw within the layers of frequencies that made up the body form of my wife was this demonic monster – a bad piece of work. It was taking her over, and as this monster never had legs, none were needed on my wife, so the pain she felt was from a fading away of life in the area.


As a teenager my wife was more a mom to her mother rather than a daughter. The marriage was on the rocks, and the mom often spoke about taking her life – this is something you don’t speak to your children about!

One morning the mom once again mentioned the topic, and my wife said to her “Well, if you want to do it, then go out and do it.” So the mom went to work, found the bosses gun, and put a bullet in her head.


Such matters are private and of no business to anyone else, and I mention them here so that others may understand the big picture and move forwards to where they belong.

Can you imagine the guilt in that seventeen year old girl. What this guilt does, is open you up to all and sundry to enter your space and do with you as you please, all the while you the biological computer being none the wiser.

I never felt of saw this demon within because it was not there from foul play – my wife inadvertently allowed it in when she was shattered into a billion pieces from her mom’s death. I bet the mom never saw that one coming, this after-effect of talking to your child as if they were your therapist.


When you cannot help another or yourself, stand back and observe so that you may see the big picture and understand. What you see in understanding will be passed on to those in need, and this will allow them to see the big picture and move on.

And please, no more guilt trips. Every single one of us has stuffed up somewhere, and I say this because one cannot be perfect in an imperfect world. If we were perfect this world would have ceased to exist a long time ago, as the Light of what you are would have removed Disharmony. This Light comes through understanding – something I am opening myself up to every second of every day so that this journal may be complete.


Open yourself up my friends – all those layers that make up your being – so that Consciousness may sweep away all that should not be.

That young girl that came to feed from my energy last night, no doubt she messed up somewhere, and this was the lot which she imposed on herself – walking the shadows as part of her self-inflicted sentence. I saw her spirit, and can safely assume her body form is devoid of all life – a drifter like her spirit.


This crap stops now. Start walking Home, and from there we can sort things out. Go where you belong, not where you feel you ought to be, living some sentence for not being perfect in an imperfect world. We have all fucked up, but we stand together to get through this shit.

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How does the biological computer walk away from the illusion?


The illusionary Garden, that fell to denser and denser states, was created by Queen Semiramis. It was created with Love – a pure and good Love. This Love was and is the template of the illusion, and it is Beautiful.

Things went wrong, which has been discussed and re-mentioned many times within the journal, so there is no need to repeat ourselves here.


So what you the biological computer, which is made up of frequencies does, is you walk away from the disharmonious frequencies within the illusion. You know they exist, and you know how they came about, and you know this is not you, so you walk away from these frequencies towards the Love that is the original state of the illusion.

By “walking away,” we imply that you do not allow these frequencies in your space. You naturally draw yourself to Love, as this is what you are, and you naturally allow Love to enter your space, as this is what you are, and the rest has no place in your existence.


The intent with which the illusionary Garden was created was one of Love, and it is this state that we circumvent and become one with whilst within the illusion.

You walk away from the Home of the Serpent and disharmonies frequencies – this is their world wherein they enjoy playing; it is no longer within your and my existence as we no longer allow such frequencies within our space.

We had to know Evil before we could walk away from anything, and we do, so let’s depart these frequencies as this is not who we are.


What are we?

Semiramis created the illusionary Garden so that others may play therein and have fun and be joyous.

So what we are, are beings that enjoy seeing the happiness in others. This makes our heart sing with joy. Do I also play? – Of course we do, but our true joy comes from seeing joy in others, as what we now see in them is within us.

This is the state I speak of when I talk about Love. This state is you as it was within Semiramis when she created the illusion. This state is allowed into you space and no other frequencies, and why this is so, is because this state is natural and real within the illusion.  Anything else does not enter your world.


We know about the parasitic frequency of Deception that created a want and need within the illusion. Had this parasite not been there, my goodness, how different everything would have been.

Now we go back to live in a state that is devoid of the parasite – we exist in the illusion as it should have been. From the illusionary realm of the Serpent a new frequency/illusion forms that breaks away from the disharmonious Reptilian frequency. For those that choose Love, this Illusion is real as it is the place that Semiramis intended us to visit and play therein.


This place is familiar to Consciousness, and although this place is not the Infinite, there is unconditional Love there, where the happiness of other exceeds our own happiness, as this was the intent of Semiramis which is now our intent.


That is how you the biological computer walk away from the illusion – you walk to what is real to what you are, which is the Love that the illusion was created from. The Home of the Serpent is no more. This is your new Home until you have played enough, and then Consciousness and the heart field become one with everything around and within them. 

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In the world in which I lived in, namely the illusionary Serpent space; the place where these mammoths embraced the Reptilian frequency of the illusion and made it their own – this place where I stayed was glued together by my reason.

When the insanity of Life touched me, I had to think it through; to make sense of it, so that I may move on. Nothing made sense, but I had to move, so the insanity slowed me down, and that is why over a lifetime many of us stay the same people we always were, where nothing changes in our character. Few better themselves, and I am not knocking nobody. If I had to look back just a few years down the line, I cringe at my actions. I took Life far too seriously – was far too intense. I have met few who are friend potential, and the rest I unknowingly pushed away through my intensity which was wrong of me, because there is good in many, and to share their space and experience this goodness is a blessing.


Now I don’t allow thoughts to linger and fester, where I try and get my head around them, as they don’t belong in my world. As soon as the thought starts it stops, as in my world there is peace with no disharmony.


Last night as I slept I was taken through a series of events – me leaving the home of my parents on a really bad footing; meeting people that turned out to be wild etc. – everything was unpleasant. When I was pulled out of these line of events my reflex response was to hold onto my energy, as I assumed what was experienced were implanted dreams to absorb energy.

But this was not the case – what I experienced was what was. This was the insanity of the illusion I inhabited.


When I open the garage door this morning  I doubt I will be greeted by the snow-capped mountains of Switzerland rather than a noisy street, with the pavements made up of Swiss chocolate rather than weeds, but I know where I belong; where I am going to, and where I was.


Who will guide us to where we belong? That onus, I feel, will be on our spirit. The spirit can see what is over the ridge – we can't. The spirit understands what it is, now it understands where the biological computer body form belongs. We move towards this place – the place what the illusionary Garden was without the influence of the parasitic frequency of Deception that created a want in those within the illusion. This place is the stepping stone towards the Infinite, meaning when we depart this illusionary realm the illusion will disappear from our existence. (All the while Consciousness and the Infinite within is growing and guiding.)

This illusion that should have been and will once again be will remain for those within the illusionary realm of the Serpent should they wish to pass to this existence of Love.


There is the fields of Infinite Love, and then there was the Beautiful illusionary Garden of Queen Semiramis that became tainted, fouled and eventually rotten by what those therein allowed the parasite within them to become. Many became sick puppies, all the while doing their best to hold onto their integrity. Many let go, where insanity became their norm.

I get this claustrophobic pressure around my chest when I think of that place.

There is the Infinite, and the Serpent illusion with the twisted Reptilian frequency, and then there is another illusion, and this one is what Semiramis’ illusion was meant to be – a gift from her; a beautiful playground. It is too this place that one moves towards.

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I told this lady that I would check on her dog next week, as I wanted to allow the healing process to do its thing, and will take it from there, but yesterday something told me to check on this dog.


If I observe through my Third Eye, then it is Steven seeing the unseen, but there is an Eye that is impartial and sees all, and this “Eye” I would call Consciousness – and when Consciousness reveals what it sees, this is the expanded circle that is felt over the forehead.

So when I checked on this dog yesterday, it was not through my Third Eye, but rather the Eye of Consciousness. What I felt on this dog were two stalks running parallel to each other, coming through the base of the feet, and twirling upwards up into this dog until they reached the strand of Consciousness at the throat area of this dog, and there these stalks surrounded Consciousness to suppress it and take it over.

Imagine a bean stalk twisting around a pole in the ground. Now speed up this process, where in a few seconds you see this stalk grow all the way up the top of the pole – that is what I felt within that dog.


That those from the shadows are exposing themselves during this covid era must be a certainty, and I say this because there is a worldwide coordinated attack. The governments of the world cannot provide their citizens with basics such as power (here is South Africa we sit with load shedding where the power is turned on only at certain times of the day) and in other countries there are similar shortages of the basics for Human survival, and yet, with the efficiency of a Swiss clock these vials to treat covid were pushed around the world.


For me, and I am open to being wrong, what we are seeing is an attack on Consciousness. The target of these entities may be the spirit or Serpent soul within, but the crown jewel is Consciousness.  They want this limitless supply of energy that arose from the Source within the Infinite.

Remember that we are living in an illusion, so what we see is not real, so when we see and experience Consciousness, this is not its true state as we are seeing it from a place that is not real. That is one of the reasons why Consciousness forgot itself – because it was not Home. The heart energy field was to be our gift from Semiramis that would bathe and nurture Consciousness so that Consciousness may always be the guide of the spirit to look after the Serpent soul within.


The attack during this covid time is on Consciousness, and we the spirit and body form are merely collateral damage, as in what happens to us is not important.

These entities are throwing everything behind this attack, and the ones at the helm are the mammoth Serpents who have embraced the Reptilian frequency of the illusion and made the illusion Home. Taking Consciousness over and sucking into its life-force will allow their illusion to remain intact, but this cannot be, as one cannot thrive at the expense of another – something that a parasite will do.


So who primarily shifts away from the Reptilian illusion to the new illusion that is now there – the illusion Semiramis initially created that is now devoid of the parasitic frequency of Deception – the one who shifts there is Consciousness.

Wow, what a party-pooper I am, taking away all the fun of this attack. It won’t happen because your victim is no longer in your space.

Thinking of throwing a tantrum and destroying all because you couldn’t get what you wanted – that also won’t happen, because you will blow up a part of the illusion that you dwell in, and this explosion will ripple through time and destroy the little that is remaining of your Home.


Go and ponder and find yourselves. Know what you are – you are Love. I chose to find a way out of this mess for all of us, including you. I Love you dearly.

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When Consciousness showed me the big picture, a widened circle appeared over my forehead. The frequency of this circle I felt rotating anti-clockwise. I would like to correlate this direction of movement with the Reptilian illusion, and a clockwise movement with the illusion that was built through the intent of Love that is now devoid of the parasitic frequency of Deception. Consciousness now rotates in a clockwise direction, meaning it is absent from the Reptilian illusion and is in the illusion of Love. It is to this rotation/state of Consciousness that we follow to be absent from the Reptilian illusion and present in the Love illusion.


This clockwise and anti-clockwise movement of frequencies is bigger than me and you – it is a shift from one illusion to another.

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1 hour ago, steven geldenhuys said:

When Consciousness showed me the big picture, a widened circle appeared over my forehead. The frequency of this circle I felt rotating anti-clockwise. I would like to correlate this direction of movement with the Reptilian illusion, and a clockwise movement with the illusion that was built through the intent of Love that is now devoid of the parasitic frequency of Deception. Consciousness now rotates in a clockwise direction, meaning it is absent from the Reptilian illusion and is in the illusion of Love. It is to this rotation/state of Consciousness that we follow to be absent from the Reptilian illusion and present in the Love illusion.


This clockwise and anti-clockwise movement of frequencies is bigger than me and you – it is a shift from one illusion to another.



The Great Separation is already happening. It is an opportunity for those who yearned for some 'external' help to make the leap to the unknown beyond to finally ride piggyback on forces of a much grander nature. While individual self-awakening and freedom from this matrix is always available to us--as units of conscious awareness---this cyclical return of the Great Forces that now Align--offers a golden opportunity to literally see the veil of illusion being torn apart and be free. That is why so many distractions are being thrown at us.

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Over twenty years ago I walked up to a horse to treat it. As I stood next to the horse I saw a speck of Light against its body. I did not understand what I saw, but something within me made me understand that I know nothing, so from that moment on I opened myself up to understand what I needed to know. The spirit of the animals would teach me what I needed to understand. So I opened myself up to these creatures of unconditional Love to lead the way.


Now I understand what I saw – I saw Consciousness. What I needed to know was to restore Consciousness to what it should be within the illusion. That was figured out today.

I believe that my job has been done. Now, after all this time, may I be helped – because I need help, as I am sure do many out there in the seen and unseen.

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When did this attack on Consciousness begin? – I would say it began when the insane cosmic geneticists saw the writing on the wall where everything within the Reptilian illusion would not be enough. They wanted it all, and then some, not understanding this insatiable desire stemmed from a flaw within. Understand what is within that deprives us of seeing and being the Love that we are, and there is no need to take as there is enough for all.

This attack on Consciousness has been going on for a long time. What we are seeing now is the final onslaught, where everything is thrown at us from all sides so that the victory that has been in the making for ages, and in as good as in the bag – this onslaught is all-out so that victory may be complete. That is why these that control this Game came forth from the shadows to reveal themselves during this covid area – they were confident they would win, thus allowing themselves to be exposed. Why they were so confident was because they have systematically destroyed the platform of society within the seen and unseen, removing integrity, consideration and pride in who and what you are, by knowing you are a being of joy and Love. We had no platform to stand our ground, and this made the final onslaught a mere formality before we would fall.


There is the Reptilian illusion and there is the Love illusion. In both there is an understanding of what happened before the beginning of time that we got into this mess, starting with the fall of The Wisdom Goddess Sophia from her realm, leading to the curiosity of the Dragon and Serpent spirits in a field of the Infinite, with this curiosity taking a form within the illusionary Garden as a parasite that was not seen by those it inhabited, rather they felt this want stir within them – they began to love the power of “I want it. Yes! It’s mine!” As those in the illusion began to be driven by consumption, Consciousness within began to forget itself.

You don’t use it, you lose it, and in no time we focused on what was without rather than being what is within.


Consciousness now understands what happened to it and the beautiful Garden of Semiramis, so it returns to this state and place, albeit now devoid of the parasitic frequency of Deception. The state of the Garden that Semiramis intended it to be is there, so disharmony begins to fall away to make way for what naturally should be there. Please don’t underestimate what the power of kindness and consideration – a natural state – can do to transform a world into a paradise. Those moments of companionship are what make a rich existence.


How will those within the Reptilian illusion exist in the absence of Consciousness?

When the essence of Consciousness is completely lost/forgotten within those in which it exists, these beings fall into The Nothingness of the Forgotten where they forget themselves. What that means is Consciousness within them is no more, meaning any trace of the fields of Infinite Love – our Home for all – is no more. Now they drift, not knowing who and what they are, as the strand around which they were created has been completely forgotten as these fools chose to play it dirty where the party never ends.

Have fun, but never at the expense of others, where others suffer from your self-centered actions.

If you don’t use it, you lose it, and you end up losing yourself completely. What will happen to these wasted spaces is from something bigger than me and you to sort out. I would say that the Consciousness within these wasted space entities will awaken and follow the Consciousness that is within the Love illusion. During this awakening these monsters may see themselves for what they are and return to Love, otherwise they will merely disappear as the illusion will one day disappear, but this disappearance of the Beasts I don’t know and thus cannot really comment.

What I do know is those in the upper echelons of the Reptilian illusion are impartial to good and bad – they merely exist in this place and it is enough for them. But there are others within the Reptilian illusion that are sadistic and merciless and cruel. You leave these brutes be because all they know and want to know is to destroy. Go there with you holier-than-holy and you are gone before you can even move a finger.


Be what you are meant to be, and how this is done is by us being where we belong. Please do not worry about those in the Reptilian illusion as they choose to be there. They may pray on your guilt that arises from your Goodness where you naturally want to assist, but all you do – all you can do – is show these Beasts your strand of Consciousness within. If they choose, in the moment they can be in the Love illusion by embracing Consciousness within. So everything lies within their court now – all they have to transform to what they naturally should be is there, where through understanding they may bring forth a strand of Consciousness and make it their own. If this is not done they will disappear completely by forgetting themselves, and once again, please understand that this is their choice. The Infinite is beyond the veil of the illusion – always there should they choose to go Home.


We have had it rough. In the Love illusion find yourself and then be yourself. There isn't real time for anything else.

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The question that needs to be imprinted within the Serpent soul, the spirit, you the biological computer, and within the illusion itself is “Am I joyous?”

If you are not joyous, then you need to stop doing what you have always done, and do something different.


Joyous means you experience the joy in those around you, as well as in yourself, and this creates a joy within you that leads to you merely being.


When I ask Consciousness to, say, check on the state of my wife’s car, I feel the large energy circle rotate clockwise over my forehead, and then I felt the uneven weight distribution of the cars energy field, which has an impact on the front tyres placing them under strain.

I ask Consciousness to observe those I wish to assist, and when this Eye opens, meaning that Consciousness is now in the space of those whom I Love who need my help, it is Consciousness that heals, as all I do is observe. I say all of this because I feel the transformation in others as Consciousness restores what was to what should be.


How you know you are within the Reptilian illusion is when you think a thought, because by thinking it means you wish to be in control of your life. The thing is, you cannot restore yourself to what you should be – only Consciousness within you can do that. And while you are thinking, wondering what needs to be done or said, ask yourself – just by-the-by – if you are joyous. The answer every time will be “no,” because when you think, it is about you, and when you are within the Love illusion it is about you and everyone else, and in others you see what is within you which you too are experiencing, which is joy.


To know means you see something and move on. To understand means to see something, and in that moment the old you is no more, and what is in its place is true and real. So don’t bullshit yourself – do you know what is being said to you, or do you understand it? The tester to answer your question is by asking yourself “Am I joyous?”

I am not, and I understand what needs to be done to become joyous. When I am not thinking, I am in the state where Consciousness is at the fore of my existence, and now Consciousness is restoring what is within me that needs to be there for me to be joyous. (Understand that when this act goes into motion it restores joy in the lives of all who touch you, which is all within the illusion.) I say these things because I feel Consciousness at work when it is released in the existence of others.


Your beacon is the question “Am I joyous?” where you understand what joy is, where what you are experiencing is joy within you that is from the joy all around you. And please understand one thing: This state is natural and permanent. I can be sitting at the pub counter sipping on my ale and all the blokes around me are having a merry time, but as soon as I exit the pub door this gloom sets over me that I have go to back to the missus and the fucked up kids. That is not joy, where joy is in fleeting moments of your existence. Yes, moments build up to events that form a life, but the joy I am talking about is permanently within you as Consciousness is taking the reins of your existence and not you the biological computer trapped within the unpleasant Reptilian illusion.


Do not think. Do not do. Be Consciousness so that this strand of the Infinite within can transform your existence to what it should be. If you feel you need to think to be in control of your existence then you will always do what you have always done and get what you have always gotten. For me, I have had a pretty shit Life, and realistically nothing major will change for the good unless I change. Let’s be honest with ourselves when we say that we are not as all-knowing and important as we think we are.

I see others around me, and through them I see the depth to which we have all fallen, and there really is no words to describe our state, except maybe “shameful and deeply sad.” And once again, I am standing first in line, this Steven that wishes to laugh and be happy, and yet there is not one soul out there within my existence with whom I may share this state. Is it me, who cannot plant my feet on the ground and just be happy, or is it the abysmal state of our planet and those that dwell therein? I would say it’s both.


What I have always done has not worked, and the reason for this is because I do not have the capacity to climb into the life of another and pick them up and make them happy, because I cannot even do this for myself. Seeing the joy in others I can count maybe on my one hand if I look back on my life, and this is so because one relies and hopes on chance in a place where we don’t belong. I cannot look after myself so there is no ways I can properly look after you. But Consciousness within me can. I could have lived in my little world and made a name for myself as a Human chiropractor and told the rest of the world to go and fuck themselves. Quickly I understood that giving others relief from pain would not cut it to fulfill me, because if I wanted to help, this route was not the answer as Life knocked these people that came to see me for a six. I had to transform what one would call Life and this would transform them.

Consciousness within you touches those that come into your space which awakens the Consciousness within them and so the ball roles.


Are you joyous? If not, stop doing what you have always done, and what that is, is stop thinking. Every thought leads to an action. Stop trying to be in control, because you never have been – you have been played by those from the shadows and the illusion itself. That world is not a nice place to be in, because if anything, it is not real and natural.

I can write and write and write, and there comes I time when there is no need for you to read or me to write. When will that day come? When will the penny drop that we live in a really unpleasant place? The powerball lottery in America stands at one billion, two hundred thousand dollars. How many of us need that money to better our lives? I would say most of us. If each one of us won 1.2 billion dollars would it make this world a happy place? I would say it would make things 1.2 billion times worse in the intermediate and long term.

Have all the money you want – there is nothing wrong with that. Just balance the scales by being what you are.


We need to go back to what is natural and real, and for this to happen Consciousness within needs to come to the fore as we the biological computer takes a back seat. Try this. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

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It was really a no-brainer – that this biological computer called Steven would surrender to Consciousness. So I broke down the walls of everything that defines and means something to me within my existence, where I agreed to allow Consciousness to take me over.

From a religious point of view, one could say that God has returned into our existence, and by “God” we imply something bigger than us that only wants the best for us. This something I call the strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness, or Consciousness, because this strand arose from the Source of the Infinite. This strand is us in its true state within the Infinite, as it is within the illusion, except that within the Reptilian illusion this star began to fade as we took to pleasure and turfed integrity. Now this strand has a new home, where it returns to the illusionary Garden as the Garden was meant to be i.e. without the parasitic frequency of Deception within. As this speck of Light begins to glow brighter until it merely is, that when gods will once again roam the planes of the illusion – gods of Compassion and Understanding.

As for me, all I wish for is to be joyous.


I know nothing and I am nothing because I am an illusionary biological computer, and yet within me is this strand that is everything. What this strand within has planned I don’t know. The stage has been set and the curtains are open. Let’s see what happens……………


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I can tell you what has happened within the Reptilian illusion.


There were those there that came to know themselves, as in this is who and what I am – and what I am I like. The environment was conducive to them, and what this environment was, was anything goes, as in do what you want – just don’t get caught out.

Then there were those that were kings and queens of their illusionary realm, where they woke up each morning, looked out over the planes, inhaled the space around me, and were at peace. They were one with the Reptilian frequency. This place defined them. Killing and mutilating and destroying were all in a day’s work. They loved this work – not because it was cruel or vicious, but merely because it was who and what they were.


Now there was been a shift, where they have sheared away from a part of them that they never knew – which is kindness. You see, they never made this part of them their own because it had no place in their existence and the place they found themselves in. They chose to destroy this part of them as they loved what the Reptilian frequency had to offer, and what that was, was the feeling of invincibility. “I am what I am because I am.” At their core they stand for a code and honour, yet there is no code and there is no honour – all that there is, is a sand castle that they build while believing, no matter what, that they are the truth, the light and the way.

It was these savage brutes that set the precedent for the Reptilian illusion, where others saw this base foundation of the Reptilian illusion, and this set the standard for what they were to become, which was the epitome of cruelty. “The boss does it, so it must be okay and true.”


This base foundation; this nothingness, where I believe that I am something and stand for something, this false foundation came to filter through the illusion, and what it gave us was a feeling of importance. “Fair enough, I am a nothing, but I know something, and this makes me better than you, meaning it is my right to have no respect for you.”

Look into the core of so many out there and you will understand that what I say is the truth. The difference between me and them was that I knew I had and am nothing, yet this doesn’t give me the right to be cruel, because I have no right to let out my frustrations and insecurities upon you.


I understand these Beasts – really I do. I also understand those they annihilated. In the lands of kings and queens they were the nothings – those Beasts

annihilated. Those who were wiped out lost all identity of who and what they are, where they survived knowing they stood no chance in this land of the true tyrannical Beast. These beings were merely born so that the cruel may fulfill their purpose of destroying.


To those that embraced the Reptilian frequency of the illusion and made it their own, everything has changed. Now they see where they have always been – in a prison. The crueler you become; the more you embrace who and what you are, the deeper your prison becomes embedded within the dense frequencies of the illusion.

Everything has changed for theses brutes as kindness sheared away from them to return to the Love illusion. Now they are no longer blind to Love as they see the Love illusion that is separate from them.


Will madness set in within them? I don’t think so. Inside of them is nothing, and now this is all they are, and have been – this false sense of power that is nothing. What they had that they loved was never real, and now they know this.

What will now echo through the illusion as this feeling of importance is removed from the seen and unseen Beast is the truth, as in “Look, see who and what you have allowed yourself to become at the expense of others.” This feeling of importance that kept the Beast alive and feeling invincible is no more. The brute; the savage is now the wimp – the wasted space they have always been.

Now there is an emptiness within the core of the Reptilian illusion. There is nothing there to keep this false, cruel utopia alive. This frequency of cruelty that was accepted by and defined the Reptilian frequency that kept the illusion intact and alive is no more. No there is a stillness as everything falls flat within the Reptilian illusion.


Shame. The power of the pompous, cruel prat and Beast within the seen and unseen is no more, because the core of the Reptilian illusion that carried them is no more.

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This shearing away, where from one illusion there are now two, allows perspective for those that were all pooled into one Happy-Clappy madhouse.

Beasts can now undeniably see what they have become, compared to what they naturally are, and those that have held onto their sanity and integrity can see where they were, where they now are, and where they are headed towards. This “I was there, am here now, and am going there” allows those in the Love illusion to be here, there and everywhere – a freedom that has not been experienced in a long time, if ever.


What all of this means to the sane, is they may rise and spread their wings and explore, because the core of the Reptilian illusion, which prevented Goodness from going nowhere, is no more.

We all had to have perspective so that we may see what we came to accept as normal, where the Beast can be cruel because they can, and innocence is preyed upon as there has never been a God of Love that guides us to freedom and joy. The Happy-Clappy madhouse was all we knew, and this is the way the cookie crumbled, where accept your fate and good luck on your path of survival.


All this has changed, and I say this because when I go into the space of Sophia and Semiramis I feel their freedom – they are here, there and everywhere. From one there are now two, which gives them perspective, which gives them freedom to move.

How does this freedom touch me and you? – As of now I cannot say. What I can say is when the ball begins to roll to what naturally should be, where Love and kindness and consideration and freedom are the norm, there will be no stopping this force and it will be felt by all.


Until that force is felt, I will keep on going until it is a natural state within my existence and all those I Love and who Love me. When that day dawns there will be no hiding for the innocent as there will be nothing to hide from.

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What is interesting to note, is those within the Love illusion, in other words, those free of the parasitic frequency of Deception and the Reptilian frequency, they form a crown about a centimeter into and along the forehead hairline. I feel a line drawn just inside the forehead hairline, and from this line appears a crown, meaning it would look as if these beings are wearing a tiara.

What this is I cannot say. My guess is that it is a natural antennae of sorts, connecting those within the spirit realm of the Love illusion. But even here, this cannot be, because as I sit here writing these words, and then choose to assess the frequency field of my biological computer, I feel this tiara within my frequency field. I feel strongly that this is a honing antennae device that connects us to Semiramis, and I say this because she was the Queen bee within the illusion. Somehow I feel I am off the mark in saying this, where I feel this natural antennae at our crown connects us to Consciousness within. With Consciousness coming to the fore, as in coming into its own, it connects to the crown antennae within our frequency field, and seen by others that can see the all, we would be perceived as illuminated – and this we are, through Consciousness within that has come unto its own.


Have been working for years to get my youngest daughters eyesight right. Nothing has worked, and her health is always faltering.

Checked on her this evening, but this time from the perspective of the Love illusion – in other words, I can now see her from a different platform, where she stands independent from the Reptilian frequency. What was felt on her was her whole left side of her frequency field was absent, as in nothing there.

What I am getting at, is being in the Love illusion opens us up to a whole new ballgame. I feel now we can see what should be, where our vision and understanding of what should be is entirely different to what we knew.

Where there meant to be horn antennae’s at our forehead? – Yes. What were their primary purpose? On that one the jury is still open for debate.

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What I was shown last night during my sleep state was a flash-drive – the ones we plug into a computer.

So let’s try and figure this out.


We are a biological computer. Inside of us is Consciousness, that is who and what we really are, but let’s not forget us the component that was created around this strand of Inherent Goodness/Godness.

We were in a place where we don’t belong, where this place limited and suppressed us, doing its best to make us feel bad about ourselves, all the while this negative energy that we emitted was used as a food source to those that dwelled within this place and knew of its true nature. The “natural” response in this place is to “fight fire with fire,” where to keep our self-respect, we defend ourselves from cruelty and begin to lash out. This is all we can do, as there is nowhere else to go. This Reptilian illusion is all there is – there is not even a little corner where we can go and rightly so feel sorry for ourselves.


By understanding how we all got into this mess, we can remove what should not have been there, and then, in this place as it was originally meant to be, we may start over to return to what should have been. What I am talking about here is the Love illusion – the illusionary Garden that Queen Semiramis created with her intent for the spirits to go and play in. We understand what fucked this place up, where a paradise became a Hell. We understand that the curiosity of the Dragon and Serpent spirits within a field of the Infinite took on a form within the illusion, and this parasite created a want and a need within us. This need, where “it’s mine and I want it so I will take it so that it is not yours” embedded itself into a frequency, what I call the Reptilian frequency. We have been holding onto our sanity so that we may not embrace this Reptilian frequency, because when we do, we are one with the System of Hell. Now this Hell is our playground, where it feeds us and makes us strong. It gives us power over others that are doing their best to survive. In this state we don’t know what the future will hold, but that is irrelevant and thus not thought of, because where and what we are now is euphoric. We are floating on an cloud, invincible, and what heightens this invincibility is by seeing the weak and pathetic Goyim – the slaves – where we know they are there and we are here. Truly, we are special. This Reptilian frequency gives one a god status, and we live in this high, not wondering about the future, because there is no future, because we control the all.


What Cruelty does not understand is their platform has been pulled from under them. They are too busy feeling important, but when the crash comes, they will feel it. They have already fallen – they just don’t know it yet.


The illusionary Garden of Love, as it was intended to be, is there, and this is the stepping stone for Consciousness as it moves towards the Source of the Infinite from where it arose.

I just need to figure out what is happening to us the biological computer on this Homeward bound path of Consciousness.


The flash-drive I was shown last night during my sleep state represents us the biological computer, as well as our less dense state the spirit. We the manufactured flash-drive/biological computer/spirit were plugged into the illusion, and the illusion made us tick over. We are a simulation and a simulation is running within us because we have literally been plugged into the illusion.

The tiara; the crown; the horns – this is our natural antennae to the All; the Infinite, and this was suppressed so that we may be plugged into an illusionary realm rather than the real one.

With Consciousness coming to the fore, the natural state for the Life that was formed around this Consciousness is for it to form a crown that connects this Life to what is, where we are all one as we are everywhere as the Infinite is infinite.


When I ask where is this place on our spirit and biological forms where we were plugged into the System, on the spirit form I feel it at the base of the skull and the upper neck, and on us the body form, it is felt lower down, as in between the shoulder blades along the spine there.


So the natural progression is to unplug ourselves from this state by knowing it is there and we choose to no longer be a part of the System.


I have had a troubled, lonely life. I remember as a teenager I went through this bad patch, where the System told me I had to slot in and find a job, but I didn’t know what to do as I didn’t know myself. I can still see the moment in my mind’s eye where we were in the dining room area and I threw a tantrum at my mom which made her cry.

As lost as I was, I knew that what I had just done was wrong, and that I would never do it again to anybody out there, especially those who love me.

This morning as I witnessed the non-chalant attitude of my children towards me, I wondered what the joy within them felt like when they are cruel to me. There is no remorse in them, only joy. Please understand that I have good children, and all who meet them remark on their star qualities, because they are Good, but there is a part of them – and I suppose in all out there – that is horribly bad.

This morning I decided to no longer be a part of those that enjoy cruelty, be it those from deep within the System or my family around me. I wasn’t sure how I would achieve this state, but now I know.


I unplug from the System.

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The System has fallen, and I say this because when I go into the space of Sophia and Semiramis I feel the illusion they were trapped in being broken apart. It feels like you taking a muffin and breaking the muffin, where the whole is now broken pieces. That is what it felt like when I went into the space of Sophia and Semiramis, and that is why I say The System has been broken.


It is not so much that you can no longer do what you always have done because you can. Now there is no you, as in no prat or Beast within The System, as the illusion as we knew it has fallen, so what made the weak and pathetic strong is no longer there to keep these wasted spaces exalted.

I feel this is the silence before the storm hits – the silence before the crash is felt. You the sane with your good hearts doing your best will find yourself in a place that is natural and where you belong. As for the Beast and the prat we leave them be to see what they have allowed themselves to become. It is not for us to interfere in their existence, because it is them with them. Nobody can help them but themselves, as they alone chose to be cruel, where they loved what they became and done.


May they have mercy on themselves. What they never understood was Evil has no friends – when you fall, you and your kin scatter like cockroaches, leaving you all alone to see what you have become.

I Love all, and thus I wrote this journal for all, but to sort out these wasted spaces I leave to Sophia and Semiramis. These Beasts have touched me, in the seen and unseen, and now they leave me be. I have no intention of going back for a group hug. I carry no grudge or bitterness. They leave me be. I was were I didn't belong, and that I am no longer there I am thankful.

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Normally during my sleep state I see the unseen, or am shown something to expand our awareness. Now and then I see how those I love fade away and lose everything, simply because they believe they are right and you are wrong. Shame, they are the victim, and this belief they will hold onto no matter what to keep their victim status alive that they were right. That the ship is sinking with them on is irrelevant – they were right!


Last night during my sleep status something different happened to the norm, where I felt changes within my form. (What I feel happen to me happens to all who wish freedom from the illusion.) I felt an addition, and then an expansion of the waves of frequencies that make up what we will call the brain, and the less dense equivalent on the spirit form.

If you have ever felt you are limited and there is only so much you can do, this is because you have been wired to only give and receive so much and nothing more.


Then this morning went into the space of Sophia and Semiramis to touch base, as what I feel on them is an indication of where we are.

On Semiramis I felt an injury to her left lower hind leg and foot. I can only assume that when she fell to be with us in this dense plane she must have injured herself. This injury I have not felt before, as in our limited vision I could not see the bigger picture. By knowing the problem was there it could be healed.

Could this injury have contributed to the insanity of Semiramis, where she knew something was wrong within her but didn’t know what? Remember when I say that our limited vision shuts us off from seeing the big picture, it is even within ourselves.

About four years ago my spirit was taken to her during my sleep state. I saw her in Human form, where she had a bob-cut black hair, was wearing a collar shirt and a skirt. She looked like something between Angie Harmon and Connie Sellecca as I remember them from about twenty years ago – a real stunner.

There was this entourage around her, and she shot me a glance and said to me “I can destroy you.” From there she proceeded to pull the limbs off those that were insubordinate to her. Then I remember waking up and finding myself in my room, and I saw her true form moving above me, which was half Dragon half Serpent. I never saw or felt the injury on her those years back, and my guess is neither did she, but something was wrong on her and she didn't know what it was.

Somewhere between all of that I felt the power of Semiramis, and what this power does is make you automatically bow down in awe. It is intoxicatingly Beautiful – a wonder that one has to experience to understand. I knew enough then to understand that this Love was a twisted Love, so I backed off out of her space as I wanted no part of what she done.


This twisted Love has now changed to a Love that was there before her Garden went upside down, and I really believe that her injury took her over the edge to insanity.


I remember driving out one weekend to go and treat some horses a few hours from us. One of the horses was ridden in a saddle that caused the horse immense pain. The pain was so bad after a while that the horse went insane, and I mean it literally went insane. That was a first for me – where I saw the insanity in another induced by pain. The mind could not deal with this barrage of pain so the mind broke.


Last night I asked my wife, if she had one wish, what would it be? It was one of those questions where you don’t really bother about the answer from others, as what you really want is to tell them what you wish for.

I told my wife that my wish is for all of us to feel Gods Love, where we know we are looked after and are no longer alone. This Love and knowing within us, that our God is present in our lives, where we are uplifted and are walking towards their Light as they reside in the Infinite where they belong, this is my wish for all.


We are Consciousness – this speck of Light. The more this Light glows the more that which was created around it begins to become less dense until that too is incorporated into the Infinite, and then all that is left is Consciousness.

That is my wish – that our God may be in a position where we are touched by her and feel her presence, all the while we are moving Homewards bound, meaning that we are becoming less and less dense until all that is left is the Love that we are.


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We are all in this mess together, so an answer had to be found for all, and by all, I mean those that dwell within the seen and unseen of the illusion. The spirit is the driver of the body form, and the spirit realm is where the deception has been primarily played out, so heal the spirit realm through understanding and this has a knock-on effect on the biological body form computer.

Something had to stop the ball from rolling, where we no longer accept that this is the way Life is. Someone had to put on the brakes and turn around to see what happened at the very beginning that Life became so unfair and cruel.

I understand what happened, and this understanding I passed to those in the spirit/unseen realm, most notably to those that were in a position to help but have been floored by the dense frequency of the illusion, and here I am talking about The Wisdom Goddess Sophia and Queen Semiramis. When I understood that I knew and am nothing, this meant I am nothing in the sense there is no one above or below me, so to go into the presence of a God and Creator was nothing as I am nothing. There was no intimidation on my part, because something within me knew there is no hierarchy in the fields of Infinite Love.


I wrote for me, and I wrote through what I came to understand by what I saw during my sleep state through my Third Eye. What I wrote had to make simple, basic common sense to me, because I might bullshit you, but there was no way I would fool myself, because more than anything I had to understand why Life is cruel.

That I have helped Sophia and Semiramis I know to be true, because when I go into their space I feel the transformation within them. Please also understand that there are not Dragons and Serpent spirits in a field of the Infinite. What there is, is movements of energy, but this energy is unlike the one in the illusion. This energy has no vibration/movement – it is a state that is unknown within the illusion. It is a state where energy is still and in a state of being, where it is everything and it plays, and by play we imply it expresses the Joy of what it is.

What we would describe through our lack of words to understand what is real we give images/pictures to, but what is out there is fluid motion. This may sound plain and boring, but what defines this non-vibrating energy, as in what it is made of, is something that goes beyond our senses and imagination. What Consciousness is in its true state is beyond words, as in this state there is no language but merely a state of Being.

When I saw Queen Semiramis in Human form, what I saw were frequencies I could not understand as they were above and beyond my level of perception, so to make sense of what I saw, my spirit and body form decoded what I saw into what I could understand. That stunner that I saw as Queen Semiramis was most probably a frequency pattern that was unimaginable to my sight, so I took what I saw and made it into something that I could comprehend. What I saw was real and was there, but it was in a form unknown to me as our vision is so limited.


I don’t have to answer or explain myself to anybody but myself, and what I have come to understand to restore Consciousness to what it should be has been enough, as in there is not more that needs to be passed on for Consciousness to become what it once was. If there was something else to understand I would have found it, not for anyone else, but for me, because I need to understand.

For me, the big picture has been solved, where the essence of Life within the illusion may return to what it is, and in the process make the Life-forms around it less dense, meaning they rise above themselves and what and where they were.

The big picture has been solved, but the small one hasn’t, and that picture is your life as well as mine. What has changed within my Life since starting this journal? My healing has expanded, where what I knew today I never knew yesterday, which has helped the one or two patients I see a week tremendously, but in terms of this Steven nothing has changed in my life. And let’s be honest – how can I truly help anyone unless I help myself? I understand my life has had to be placed on the backburners until I understand the big picture, because the big picture was more than just me as it involved everyone. But there comes a time when we have to look after ourselves, because if we don’t, who will? (Divine intervention will come, but until it does, what can we do to help ourselves?)  


So it is here and now that I apply what has been learnt over the years during my sleep state to help us the biological body form. For fucks sakes, don’t we also deserve to be happy!

So here goes…………….


When I see an animal patient, there are three steps to healing them.

The first is “What is the cause of the problem?” – The case history is vital to understanding the disharmony the animal is carrying.

The second step is “Where is the primary problem?” – When there is disharmony within, one tends to work around this problem to avoid it, creating secondary problems, or the primary problem travels through the body causing secondary problems. One needs to target the primary disharmony, and this is done by asking for it i.e. bringing it forth by knowing it is there. (My assessment of the primary problem is by checking the alignment of the skeleton, where the misalignment correlates with the cause in the case history.)

The third step is knowing there is something bigger than you that heals, and what this is, is Consciousness within.


This is all that is needed to heal, and I say this because it is applied to the animals that come to me for help, and it works. I say it works because I feel the changes within them as the healing is carried out, and I feel the before and after changes in the skeleton. Many examples can be given, but this is something I would not like to do here.


What I do to the animals is remarkable, and this is so as what I do is simplistic.

Now we apply this simple technique to us the body form, remembering we are waves of frequencies within a sea of frequencies that make up the illusion.


The first question is what is the cause of the problem?

The cause is that we were plugged into a simulation so that we may feed the illusion energy. This is no longer the case as we are unplugged from the illusion and are free from the Reptilian illusion and have returned to what the illusionary Garden was meant to be. Simply put – we have started anew on a blank slate.

So the cause of the problem is no longer there.


The second question is what was the primary problem; what is the primary disharmony?

The primary problem was that Consciousness forgot what it was – it’s Light had faded to the point where it forgot itself, and this was so because we forgot our Good Hearts i.e. the Infinite within us that nourished Consciousness as this was its Home.

This primary problem has been solved by Consciousness remembering what it is and how it got to be in this state of forgetfullness, namely the fall of Sophia and the illusionary Garden of Semiramis. (This understanding removes the parasitic frequency of Deception from the Life-form that was created/born around Consciousness.)


So we understand the cause of our dilemma, namely being in a place where we don’t belong i.e. being plugged into a simulation, as well as the primary disharmony, which was the forgetfullness of Consciousness within, so what should happen is your life and mine should be unfolding as they should, because the third step to healing is sitting back and allowing that something bigger than us, namely Consciousness, to heal.


But here is the rub: What is Consciousness healing? What problem needs to be solved in your Life? In other words, what needs to be done so that you may shine? And this is where I believe the health, wealth and happiness states come into play, where each state is relative to you the biological computer compared to another.

The big picture has been seen to, and I know there will come a time when we feel the state of Love from a God and a Creator, but until that day comes, I need to do something to help myself, as to sit around and wait is something I cannot do. I truly believe there is enough understanding within us to transform ourselves.


We all need money to live, but ask yourself what you cannot live without, and what that is, is the problem that needs to be solved in your life. If you do not know what you cannot live without, then allow Consciosness to go through the health, wealth and happiness states in your life to see what you are lacking so that you may once again become a whole.

What I cannot live without is silence. The noise and callousness of this world destroys me bit by bit with each passing day. I need a sanctuary where I may find my silence where I may be at peace. You may not understand this as you do not know me, but this is the problem within my existence that Consciousness is now put to task to heal.

How is this done by Consciousness?


We live in an illusion – a simulation, and through our understanding we are unplugged from this simulation, meaning there is no limit as to what we can do and what comes our way. Yes, we are still playing within the confines of a simulation, but the awareness of Consciousness allows us to see and do more, and most importantly, receive what we need to solve our problem within the simulation. And this is where I cannot help you until I help myself, because without help I won’t make it, and thus will be of no use to anyone.

We can analyze and talk all we want, but for me, find harmony in the states of health, wealth and happiness in your existence, and there will be a constant and natural joy in your existence. Health, as in being healthy; Wealth, as in having what makes you comfortable; and Happiness where you are doing what you love.

I have happiness, as I understand the cruelty of Life enough where a transformation will be felt by all, where we are going in the right direction. What I don’t have is Health, as well as Wealth, and somewhere between receiving these two states from Consciousness I will find my sanctuary.


My goodness! Inside of you and I is a God/Infinite force that is coming unto its own. Surely solving the problems of the smallness that we are must be child’s play to Consciousness.  If you do not know what you truly wish for, then allow Consciousness to balance the three states that lead to peace. From this platform catapult yourself and Consciousness to the fields of Infinite Love. For me, I need to find peace in myself before I can enter this Kingdom of Heaven, namely the Infinite which lies beyond the illusion.



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There are some things in Life that one cannot truly understand until you have been there and experienced the situation. Some things you wish on nobody to experience, the one being the death of your child, and the other seeing your child being taken along the current of Life where they are swept into the cesspool of Life – where your kid is sucked into and lost to the insanity and bad ways of Life.

What do you do when you see your fallen children? As a parent who Loves them more than anything, what goes through you when you see that your children no longer recognize you, and the Love that you are has disappeared from their existence to make way for the ways of the Beast, where anything goes, and you know their demise when it is felt by them will be swift and agonizing.

Death is final and gut-wrenching, but to see your child fall to the ways of insanity where they make this madness their own, that must be soul destroying.


May you and I never go through what Queen Semiramis is currently going through, where she sees her children for what they have become – wild brutes that love who and what they have become.

How do you heal the blind that do not want to see? – You cannot, and yet you have to.


She bathes the Reptilian illusion with the Glow from the Infinite so that these savage Beasts that were once her beloved children may know she is always with them. Now they see and they know. What will swing these Beasts to be what they were? I would say the emptiness within them – that bottomless void that can only be filled by what is real, namely the Love of a mother. Their first taste of this Love will set them free. When one bites the rest will follow, so I believe the angst within Semiramis will be short lived.

Until the nightmare is over, I give her my Love.


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The trick to Life is communication. When we start talking, it is inevitable that we find a way out of this mess, as if there is one thing one cannot suppress, it is the truth. The truth rises up naturally to where it belongs for all to see, and what you see is not spectacular, it merely is what it is – nothing fancy or Wow, just the truth.


This truth from rising and merely being for all to see was never allowed to happen, so this Truth became inverted, where it can be staring you right up against your face, but you won’t see it as it has been inverted, meaning you will see the complete opposite of what is naturally there.

When I ask what was done to invert the truth, what I feel is a river of energy passing over my throat area, but this river is coursed away from the strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness, what we will call Consciousness. So instead of everything in the illusion flowing over Consciousness, and in that moment, everything being, as in understanding the Truth, nothing within the illusion could be touched by Consciousness, so what naturally should be, became the reverse, as in see what you are plugged into and told what is real, rather than see what is naturally there.

That is why the illusion needs so much energy – to keep the lies alive, where we believe they are the truth. A constant barrage of bullshit needs to be fed to us, and this requires energy on a monumental scale to keep the illusion real to the masses in the seen and unseen.


A repelling device of sorts was placed around Consciousness, pushing away all that would have interacted with it. By knowing this device is there, it is no more, as what this device done was automatically flip over everything that came in its way, where the Truth became inverted, meaning believe the lies rather than what is there, and this confusion makes communication impossible, as nothing made simple, basic, common sense.


This device is no more, and what naturally should now happen will, as all are touched by Consciousness within. Now we are real; now we are natural, and now we can start talking and listening to the Infinite.

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20 hours ago, steven geldenhuys said:


What there is, is movements of energy, but this energy is unlike the one in the illusion. This energy has no vibration/movement – it is a state that is unknown within the illusion. 


What we would describe through our lack of words to understand what is real we give images/pictures to, but what is out there is fluid motion. This may sound plain and boring, but what defines this non-vibrating energy, as in what it is made of, is something that goes beyond our senses and imagination. What Consciousness is in its true state is beyond words, as in this state there is no language but merely a state of Being.


That stunner that I saw as Queen Semiramis was most probably a frequency pattern that was unimaginable to my sight, so I took what I saw and made it into something that I could comprehend. What I saw was real and was there, but it was in a form unknown to me as our vision is so limited.



 The big picture has been seen to, and I know there will come a time when we feel the state of Love from a God and a Creator, but until that day comes, I need to do something to help myself, as to sit around and wait is something I cannot do. I truly believe there is enough understanding within us to transform ourselves.




What there is, is movements of energy, but this energy is unlike the one in the illusion.



This energy has no vibration/movement – it is a state that is unknown within the illusion.

Yes. And it will overwhelm a consciousness in its complexity. There is a reason why. Something of unbelievable complexity shares the same space in which you move.


What we would describe through our lack of words to understand what is real we give images/pictures to, but what is out there is fluid motion.

I can only tell you so much, you can't grasp it if it doesn't prepare you beforehand. And you must have already correctly assigned the reality that can be perceived by humans. All of it. And that is tiny compared to what comes next.

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When I talk about me, as in this Steven, what I am doing is becoming realistic.

Great stuff – I have seen the Reptilian frequency of the illusion and those that dwelled in its shadows, where I understood these were the real players of the illusion, as in they know the Game and they are playing in it, albeit at the expense of those doing their best to hold onto their sanity.

It is also understood what happened at the beginning, where a pure, natural Love in all became twisted, self-centered and cruel.


This we understand. Great stuff, but where too from here?


This morning as I woke up the penny dropped. There has been one inversion – the greatest one of all – and this inversion keeps us where we have been doing what we have always done.

We need to be realistic, as in look to what is real, and what this is – in my particular case – is my Life. Am I happy? – No. Am I fulfilled? – No. Am I at peace? – No.

Then how is this possible? After all I have seen and come to understand, how is it possible that these understandings have not touched me in at least some small way where I shine? The answer is that we have missed the biggest inversion of all: “What are we?”


In our world; in our existence, if you cannot see it or touch it, it cannot be real. This is our belief, and once again, we have to be realistic, when we understand that what we see and feel and touch is an illusion. Hammer this realistic statement into your psyche until it sticks and stays there. The biggest inversion of them all is what we believe to be real.


“I am this Steven, and I understand, but I am not content, and I know exactly what will make me content, but not a fuck does it materialize.”

The reason for this, and I am being realistic, is what I want is an illusion. “Okay, so the food I eat is not real, so I no longer have to eat!”


What is not real is you, so by you thinking you are real, you need food that you believe to be real.

Please, please understand that after all I have been through in writing this journal, I am not writing words now that sound great and deep but mean nothing to bring about peace within us. I have to be realistic, because more than anything, I wish to be happy and content and at peace.

I need to find joy, and I need to be realistic, because what I have done up to this point has not helped.


What is you what is real is Consciousness. That is being realistic. That we think we are the spirit or biological computer is not true and real, and that my friends is the biggest inversion of them all, where we think if we cannot see it or touch it, it cannot be real.

What we wish for and want to bring about peace and happiness is found in an illusion, so what you get from what you wanted is not real, and this is so because neither are you the spirit and body form real.


You the spirit and biological form look to what is real, as this is all that is true within the illusion. This Love illusion is there and we are in it, but what is it – an illusion. It is not real and neither are you, and once again, please understand that what I am saying is realistic. Do what you have always done and get what you have always gotten. As hard as that sounds for all of us doing our best, that statement is being realistic.


When this journal began I knew nothing. Now after almost nine years of living and breathing this journal, where I have put aside my interests and what was best for my family so that I may know the truth, I know something, but let’s be realistic and say that I still really know nothing, the proof being that nothing has changed within my existence. Within the first few weeks of writing, what was hammered home was living in the stillness of the silence. Many takes have been given over the years as to what this stillness is, and none of them have really jelled and stuck.

What this stillness is, is the state where you the spirit and body form look to Consciousness within you, and you be this state of Consciousness. Look at it by knowing it is there, and then be this strand that is real. By “be,” we imply you do nothing as you are nothing while Consciousness is given the opportunity to shine and touch the Life of you the spirit and body form. Does that not make sense? Damn right it makes simple, basic common sense.


The truth is simplistic, otherwise it is not the truth.

What is real is Consciousness, so you just be, as in allowing Consciousness to shine and show the way. You are the vehicle and Consciousness is the driver. No more wants or needs from your part, because you might know something, but you are nothing as you are an illusion living within an illusion. That is the truth, as in what has just been said is real and realistic.


The practical component of what has just been said is to just let go of everything that is important and means something to you. Surrender yourself to Consciousness as this is real. You know this to be realistic and the truth, so now just press the shut-down button and let go. The spirit understands, and you the body form understands, meaning what is real within you will be allowed to come to the fore.


At the very beginning within the illusionary Garden of Semiramis the parasitic frequency of Deception created a want within us, and what this means is we the illusion became real while Consciousness was pushed to the back seat. And that my friends, was the biggest inversion of them all, where we embraced the illusion and ignored what is real. And for all this time, for thousands and thousands of years, where worlds and civilizations have come and gone, we have continued to make the same mistake.


This stops now. Go back to what is real.

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Yesterday afternoon and evening were bad, where all-time lows were felt.

When it was understood that the want within us created by the parasitic frequency of Deception "solidified" the illusion, where we made the illusion real by wanting what was within it, I knew that I had crossed the finish line, where the full circle had been complete and we understood why Life has been so cruel.

The inversion of an illusion to something “real” while the real Consciousness within the illusion became ignored, was the beginning of the end. Hell was born, and there was no turning back from there unless we understood what created this want, which was the curiosity of those within the Infinite as to what else is in this illusion, because never before had an illusionary realm been created within the Infinite. This unknown state of curiosity made itself manifest within the illusion as a worm, what I call the parasitic frequency of Deception, and this worm was neither good nor bad, it merely was. The Egyptians understood this, because they replicated this worm as a weapon, but never released it as they knew this entity would destroy all, including themselves. They had the understanding of what took me so long to figure out, but this information must have been suppressed as these gods loved being the boss.


“So why the sad face Steven?”

Well, that’s just me. If I give someone something I expect a “thank you,” because for me manners should come naturally. There was no ticket-parade from the unseen when they were presented with the completed volume of what happened to all of us that we landed in this mess. You see, what understanding does is it transforms. By knowing and understanding one does the complete opposite of what you always done, as you understand you walked there, so now you are walking here. There is no need to retreat to our cave in the mountains, where we fill our days sitting in the lotus position chanting “Ommmmmm.”

When you understand you naturally transform to what you should always have been with no effort on your part, because the understanding places you where you belong.


Yesterday evening was bad. I knew I crossed the finish line, yet I saw myself for what I was sitting on the chair, which was one really unhappy dude, and if you ask me what was the core of this unhappiness, I would say it was from feeling sorry for all of us. We have had it rough; we have had it bad, where spilling blood – either in abattoirs or on the battle fields – was seen as a necessity for survival and freedom. No doubt we were born of savages, where the only real freedom we felt was the release of energy from our loins or shooting up a drug into our veins or up our nose.

We have had it tough, and the saddest thing of all is it was nobody’s fault. The fall of Sophia from her space; the inception of the parasite – they were honest mistakes, where no harm was meant to another.


I see the world for what it is, and truly, it is fucked up. We are all on survival mode.

If you want something, then by all means go out and receive it – there is nothing wrong with that. The issue that has always been at hand was that we forgot about kindness. We were not kind to others, showing all our true colours, meaning we were never kind to ourselves. Yes, the few controlled the many, but if the many were kind, we would never allow the few to harm us all.


This is the one trait we need to recapture and make our own – kindness.


Care for others as you care for yourself. How or when we apply this will come naturally, as this is who we are.

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