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Know what you are.

steven geldenhuys

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As has been said, the biggest bone-crusher in the illusion is loneliness. I am not saying that if we join a book-club it is problem solved; I am saying that we do not know ourselves, and what I mean by this is that the vices we have picked up while existing in a place where we don’t belong have created shadows over us that have come to define us.

Over the last twenty years or so I have had some phenomenal dogs. I loved and love them all equally – there are no favourites, but this morning I understood my dog Max, who passed away over ten years ago. Max was the closest of my dogs that came to mirror me, in that he just was what he was. There were no real vices on Max – he just was what he was; he was just himself.


Throughout my time in the illusion I have always just held onto me – I never allowed the illusion to twist me and bend me and shape me into something I am not. The poison/disharmony of the frequencies I have inhabited made me very bitter, and this bitterness was an expression of my disgust towards the cruelty of Life. I would also not like Steven if I had to meet him, as there was nothing much jovial or happy about him. The System weighed me down  and got me down, and you could see this a mile away, but it never changed who and what I am, which is a being that more than anything wants to be happy and just be who and what they are meant to be.

This is where loneliness comes in, as we are not what we are meant to be. There is nothing worse than being in a place where you don’t belong, be it in a job you hate or around family that are unpleasant strangers. We are not what we are meant to be, and we are in a place where we don’t belong.


For those out there that are like Steven, embrace this Nimue frequency and start flying – bring out what you have put on ice.

For those that have been buckled and re-shaped by the System, lose your vices because they are not you. Be Love and Joy and Happiness, as this is what you are and nothing else, and please, don’t be too hard on yourself. You have been played by a cruel System that is not kind. I see those from the shadows that demand a sex act so that they may feed from our release of energy. I see Humans that are not Humans, and I know the Serpent within them that is them. I see the literal insane that others see as normal, and I know that their spirits are lost forever.  


Something within all of us has to awaken and come to the fore, and that is our kindness. We need to unite with what we are and express what we are, and from there come together as one. You are me and I am you. I cannot be you or want something from you to fulfill me, as I am me and this is all I need. This knowing and being what we are brings a natural peace within, but we are not islands, we are linked together by what we are, which is kindness. This unity creates joy, and from the whole we will understand that we are all one – we came from one Source within the fields of Infinite Love.


Those within my existence have vices, and I am sure if I look closely, I might see something in me that they see that they don’t like. How do we live with those whose vices are cruel, as this is what the System has defined them to be and these beings embraced this warped state and made it their own?

Know what you are, and if you do not know what you are, then know what you would like to be, and then step into a frequency that is compatible to the kindness within you. You want to be this kindness and nothing else as this is who and what you are. What I am trying to say is look to yourself and not others. Keep moving with the frequency where you belong and what you are. You are you and not others. When we have all come to understand this, then we can see that we are all one, but it starts with you.

The vices of others get me down because I am not like that – I am not nasty. I know that their vices are so unnecessary and things can be so different if they would just consider others rather than feed and be their vices. What I see in others slows me down because it upsets me. I can be many things, but I am not cruel, and I don’t like being around cruel Beasts.

One needs to see the kindness in others and walk with this kindness. If there is no kindness in others I cannot walk with them, as they are not me and I am not them. This journal has passed on understanding to those in the unseen, and through this understanding if those still want to be cruel then it is not for me to be Florence Nightingale and tuck them in at night while they knowingly destroy themselves. I will do all I can to help the innocent, and our Creator will help those that cannot be helped. To the cruel I am indifferent – I am not big enough where I can Love them, and yet, having said that, this journal was written for them, so that one day all may return Home.

I walk with kindness as I am tired of walking with cruelty. I would like to be amongst my own. I will walk in the kindness in others, just as they will walk with my kindness. I will not walk with vices; with nastiness; with cruelty, as they are not me. I LOOK for the kindness in others and I walk with that and nothing else. If I see no kindness, then I carry on walking, as I am not walking alone. I am walking with me and I know what I am.

5th November, 2021

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David Icke was the one in this lifetime that got my curiosity sparked as in “what else is out there,” and “there is more to life than meets the eye.” When the cruelty of Life touched me it spurred me on to write this journal to understand why Life is so cruel.

Off the top of my head, when the ball began to roll, I can think of two that pointed me in the right direction in finding the truth. The one was in the unseen, my friend the God of Wrath, and the other was in the seen, namely Pierre Sabak. When I told Pierre I could see the unseen – what was hidden from us that we were not allowed to see, he pointed me in the right direction that helped me to understand. From there, when I hit a brick wall and all else failed, I turned to Pierre to look beyond words written to uncover the truth.

In April 2016 I knew about the branding of our spirit, as cattle are branded with the mark of their owner. Pierre confirmed this with his own research, that we were branded, and what Pierre wrote I list below. For me, it was the spirit that was branded, and this branding did not kill us in the literal sense, but rather it reduced us to worthless and useless feeders. It is now, after all these years, that I feel I truly understand what this branding done.


This branding at our spirits neck area was a mark, as all brandings are, but this mark was to close off the circuitry around our heart energy field. The intent of the branding at our neck sent a specific and co-ordinated shockwave to our heart energy field. In the natural space of Love there is a natural code where what you give, the Infinite acknowledges this “gift” and returns this gift/state to you so that you may understand what you are. In simple English, Love breeds Love, and in this cycle this space is for nothing but Love.

From the heart energy field Love was expressed, and our branding closed off our connection to Love that is in the Infinite beyond the illusion. They say that no good deed goes unturned, but thanks to our branding, this was never the case, and that is why Evil ruled supreme while the Good were shamed and destroyed. Our power of Love and our circuitry into the Infinite was closed off.

What we wish for – what we want more than anything from the bottom of heart – cannot form as a result of this branding.


Pierre mentioned that our fingertips were also branded, and I would say that this was for us to become spiritual “lepers,” where our Midas touch to create what was real became no more.


Go into the stillness of the silence and remove this branding at the side of the neck and the fingertips by knowing it is there and doesn’t belong in the presence of Love. This opens the bridge from your heart energy field to the Infinite so that you may sing and naturally express what is important to you. Look to Peace and Happiness, and the rest will follow.




This is what Pierre Sabak says of branding in his upcoming book Holographic Culture (to be published in the spring of 2016):


Brandishing angels quotation from my upcoming book Holographic Culture.


‘In light of the fact that Michael is deemed to be a ‘Prince of the Host’, the wordplay ‘Mikiel’ (who is like God?) is it would seem a slight of hand and is a covert acknowledgement of the angelic lineage. There are however further possible interpretations. The cognomen ‘Michael’ is perhaps better transliterated as ‘mi-kiy-El’ (loosely a flaming God), a title that infers a strong affiliation between an ‘angel’ and a ‘deity’ otherwise an ‘Elohim’ and their cohorts the ‘seraphim’. The novel idea that ‘Michael’ is actually an ‘Elohim’ is a straight forward argument when carefully scrutinised and is furthermore an aspect found encoded in his name, listed below:

Registered the interrogative pronoun ‘mi’ (who, whom, from, out of) is incorporated with the verb ‘kiya’ (to brand, scar or burn), from the prime root ‘kviya’ (to burn). The conjunct ‘mikya’ (from or whom burns) is affixed with the name ‘El’ the abbreviation of ‘Elohim’ generically (a God). Significantly the incorporation of the title ‘El’ (God) assumes in a literal sense that the ‘angel’ is a ‘God’ or a ‘deity’ and is substantiated in the Aramaic. Relative the epithet ‘Elohim’ (the lofty or shining ones) is a designation honorific of the (Gods) and is a word interchangeable in the original dialect with (an angel). For example ‘El’ (a God) is used typically to signify angelic names, for example Raphael, Samael, Uriel, Gabriel etc…

Careful deliberation therefore suggests that the appellation ‘Mi-kiy-El’ can be interpreted as (whom or from the God that burns) in a figurative sense a ‘manifestation’. The phrase additionally infers consternation as demonstrated in the emphatic translation (who is this God that stigmatises Greek ‘stigma’ to brand with a pointed instrument).

As with the ‘seraphim’ e.g. ‘srefa’ (fire) the connotation is of a ‘flaming angel’ a ‘seraph’ an entity that marks his adversaries. ‘Michael’s epithet in the original nuance is therefore presumed to be a ‘conqueror’ and is considered to be an ‘Elohim’ or ‘God’ in his own right. Consistent with the Semitic tendency towards paronomasia the angel ‘Michael’ brandishes ‘makel’ (a staff, rod or stake). The analogy of the ‘inflamed brand’ draws inference to the angelic ‘kerubim’ Hebrew ‘kherev’ (a sword). An armed soldier, representational of the host the kerubim angel is depicted in biblical symbolism, Genesis Chapter 3 Verse 24 as carrying a ‘flaming sword’, and impresses a fiery weapon that induces burns. (The concept of the lighted brand is also implied in Sura 8 ‘Al-Anfal’ Battle Gains Verse 12, refer to introductory quote) in which the victims of Badr display strange brandishing marks:

‘Your Lord revealed to the angels: “I am with you: give the believers firmness; I shall put terror into the hearts of the disbelievers. Strike above their necks and strike their fingertips.” That was because they opposed God and His Messenger, and if anyone opposes God and his Messenger, God punishes them severely” That is what you get! Taste that!” – and the torment of the Fire awaits the disbelievers… It was not you who killed them but God: God is all seeing and all knowing’.

M.A.S Abdel Haleem, Qur’an, Oxford University Press, Sura 8 ‘Al-Anfal’ Battle Gains) Verse 12

In Sura 8 Mohammed cites Allah’s ultimate superiority, in which God is not above killing and using his army to rout or dispose of his adversaries. The Islamic annalist Al Bukhari archives the presence of the angelic host and their destruction at Badr. Dramatic, the account of Bukhari is gleaned from his witness Ar-Rabi bin Anas, who notes the following points:

‘On the day of Badr people could see those who had been slain by the Angels among the dead by the blows above their necks and on their fingertips which looked as fire had burnt them’.

Badar Azimabadi, The World of Angels, p70

Pierre Sabak, Holographic Culture, Serpentigena Publications 2016,


5th November,2021



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In my sleep state last night I found it odd that I saw nothing. Then, on cue, my spirit found itself in a room with executives from the horse industry, but this was merely a correlation of what I know, namely the horses, because as will be explained, what I saw could be related to any industry/business.

These people in the room were in a fluster as they had just found out that they had been taken over by a conglomerate. Their industry, and what they have always known, changed within the space of one day. They now had no power and no say, as what had taken over their business called the shots.


Then I was shown a map of a world. This was also symbolic, as the map did not show our world, but rather land masses with speckled dots of islands everywhere.

The message was that what I saw on the map ruled over all. In a fleeting moment I heard the name Saudi Arabia, but the name was irrelevant as one country did not so much rule the others – rather one country was all the other countries as well. To give me perspective, I saw at the bottom of the map a speck island with the name Beijing. We see China as big and powerful, but in perspective of what rules, the government of Beijing and the country of China are dwarfed by what rules. One mass of power rules and there is nothing else here in our world/frequency.


David Icke talks about the Sabbatini cult that rules the world, and this is so. Through this Covid nonsense they are rising from the depths, and through this we see that through their minions that we call leaders, they truly rule over all. There is one land mass, and that is planet Earth, and they rule over that.


The problem with insanity is that it does not allow perspective – you see a situation from only one side, namely your own, resulting in the other half of the picture not seen and understood. You see your Game on your chess board and you think this is all there is, especially since you own the board and the pieces thereon. But you never saw beyond the chess board; you never saw the table on which the chess board rests. You never saw the table, and those sitting around the table, and when you do see and understand, you realize how small and insignificant you are. Now you are caught out, in that by others seeing you and what you do, you see yourself from their perspective, and in that moment you know what you are and what you have become.

Now the tables are turned. Now from one day to the next, what you have always known and been is no more.


May God/the Creator have mercy on those false Gods that used their power and understanding to destroy rather than uplift. Your days in the sun are over my friends. Soon, you will see yourself for what you have become. I am not just talking about this cult; I am referring to the architects of the illusion and those that feed off the fear and sorrow of the innocent.

This will be a time when we the species of the illusion within the seen and unseen will have to know ourselves. Now you no longer drift and go with the flow or ride in the slipstream of who rules the roost at that moment in time. Now it is just you with you. God helps those who helps themselves. Help yourself by getting to know yourself – what you truly are. Decide what you want to be – Love or Cruelty; what is real or what is an illusion. This is the time when backbones are grown or jellyfish continue to be pulled along with the tide. This is the time of reckoning, and if you understand this, it is a moment of sheer Bliss, as you get to know what you truly are, where you see the Love of the Infinite that you are. You have always known that there is more; that there is something bigger than all of us, and now you witness this phenomena and become it.

7th November, 2021

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When I closed my eyes to sleep, only to be awoken by those from the shadows that we are not allowed to see, this was a moment – that happened almost eight years ago and carried on to this day – this was a moment where I understood why Life is so cruel.

We the spirit here on planet Earth is a slave species, kept in coops/cages so that we may feed beings in the unseen realms. This journal describes my experiences with these Beasts that control all of us, and let’s just say that enough has been said about them. I would like to start a new chapter in my existence.


When I saw the unknown it was no big deal, as this was a natural occurrence within the illusion. The shapes and sizes of the Beasts I have encountered blows me away as it is fascinating to see those that lurk from different dimensions, but what I saw last night threw me, in that what was done to me and my wife was a first, and once again, I stress that what I saw done to us from the shadows was as natural as us breathing.

I closed my eyes to sleep last night, and from there I saw three Human-looking men walking over our bed. These guys were busy – they were there for a specific task. What they were doing was collecting bundles of our energy with their outstretched hands and placing this energy in their transporter wagon of sorts.


Since my Third Eye was opened I have always known/seen how these entities implant a dream/story into us as we sleep, and by giving the dream attention/energy, they take of this energy to feed, but what I saw last night blew the lid on what the illusion has really become.

The currency of the illusion is energy, and by illusion I mean all those worlds/frequencies and dimensions in the seen and unseen – the spaces that branched out from Queen Semiramis’ initial Garden where she encouraged the Dragon and Serpent spirits to come and play in. As a comparison, take one small bubble of air that arose from a scuba diver under the ocean, and in this tiny bubble are all the worlds that make up the illusion. Everything else outside this bubble is the fields of Infinite Love. That is how small and insignificant the illusion is to the All. The trick is to pop the bubble so that we become engulfed by the All and are once again Home.


In the stillness of the silence of the Infinite it merely is, and from nothing comes everything. This is the way it is.

In the illusion is the opposite, where there is always a motion; a flux; a frequency that is doing something. Everything has a cycle of death and birth, and all we do is go round and round chasing our tails. The basis of this false, illusionary state, and it is just that – an illusion – is energy. We kill and take for our energy called “food,” just as those from the unseen implant stories/dream from which they eat our energy, but I never knew the other role that our energy plays in.

This answers the question: “What is a thought?”

When we think we emit bundles of energy, and this energy is collected by those who have crossed over and are Beasts that see and understand the Hell/home that they find themselves in. They know it is Game-on, where the currency of the illusion is energy and this energy they need to survive.

(Someone that has lived a Life, let’ say on our planet, where they have done their best and have always been kind, when their body form dies their spirit will go to a less dense plane. They will imagine themselves to be in Heaven; a wondrous place, but this is just another shop-front window within the illusion. No energy is needed here because they are “home,” but this is just in their imagination. The spirit is merely in a vacuum/intermediate state until it is sent to another battlefield/world/frequency where it may learn. This learning is an absolute load of bullshit as there is nothing to learn – we just need to remember what we are and what happened to us so that we may trace our steps back Home.)

Those that become disillusioned with the illusion and are tired of being nice, as the natural state within the illusion is to be cruel, these spirits become Beasts and become integrated into the Reptilian flow/frequency of the illusion. This is where you let your hair down and anything goes, and now you understand the currency of Hell. It is not the dollar or the yen, but energy. This I never knew – this energy currency within Hell; the illusion.


When I say that we are a slave species, what I mean is that the spirit has been made to “bleed” energy. Hold onto your energy and you can create and become omnipotent, even this Reptilian energy/frequency, and I assure you that even here in the illusion, a good heart and energy harnessed/kept can create worlds of wonder and splendour. Those that are nasty like to keep it dirty as this is what their insanity demands, but even here in the illusion things could have been very different if we all held onto our integrity and were kind/cared about others other than ourselves.

As I lay in bed last night with my eyes closed I felt this pain on the inside of my right knee, and from there I saw those that came to collect our energy to add to their wealth. This spot on the spirit I believe is where we are bleeding our energy, but this will be confirmed later.


This lady asked me to check on her dog yesterday as it was not well. When I went into the space of this animal I was thrown a wobbly, as there was disharmony everywhere and I could not grab onto something to sort it out. I felt his mini sun inside this dogs brain, as in I felt this glowing, pulsating energy source. (Our pets have unconditional love, where they care more about us than themselves. This places them on a higher plane, where they see and understand what we cannot. If they see disharmony on us they take it upon themselves to help us, but this is a lose-lose situation as they merely sink down with our ship.) This dog was taking on the effects of the Covid injection his owner took. What I felt within both their brains was  an Alien entity injected into them that was taking over the spirit. Within their brain it was growing its own brain, this “mini sun.”

What this Covid nonsense is, is a take-over of our spirit by an Alien entity. It is not a spiritual battle, as in a battle you can see the enemy. This is a spiritual take-over that the spirit is not aware of.


This week a lady asked me to assess her grandmother that was not well. No case history was given. When I went into her space I felt her spiritual connection closed off to what is out there. The right side of our brains have a link here to what is bigger than us, as in there is more than meets the eye, and on this grandmother it was closed off. I told the lady that her gran was under a spiritual attack, where her spirit was placed in a bottle and couldn’t get out. This will affect her mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Her response was that her gran was fine mentally – she was in hospital with lung problems. What I picked up initially was the effects the Covid injection done to the grans spirit. It was denied access to what is out there, and from there it would be trapped as this injected entity took it over. Remember, we see an injection with fluid inside, but on a frequency level what is inside the injection is to take over the spirit. This is obviously intentional, and why this is so is to harness the spirits energy more efficiently. Now the spirit is literally being ridden on; taken over by another that feeds from it. Sick. Sick. Sick.


Years ago I wrote a chapter in the journal about holding onto our energy. We anticipate our every next move on a subconscious level, and from there we release energy to get us moving as in to feed the action that needs to be done. But it we held onto a portion of our energy, and did not let all of it flow into the action, we could accumulate our energy for reserves. Now we can play with our reality through our accumulated energy, where we can bend frequencies or create new ones.

In the big picture, this means nothing. In healing others we are once again really doing nothing to help, because as long as our dyke has a hole in it, we are as flat and useless as a burst balloon. We have been made to bleed energy so that we may become a slave species to those that are surfing the Reptilian frequency of the illusion. Stop this bleeding and you stop being a slave. Stop this bleeding, accumulate your energy and hold onto it, and from there make the Nimue frequency your own, and you cannot be touched by Beasts as you find your way Home.

People who I have known for years have allowed their spirits to cross over to become Beasts. Their spirits have searched the illusion to find the meanest, most deadliest mother-fuckers to take Steven out. As an example, two nights back I closed my eyes to sleep, and I saw this moving bush in front of me. In this bush was a man – a tribesman from some lost, forgotten world within the illusion. From this bush broke off another smaller bush, and in this bush was another entity. This dude released its long, thin snake onto me. I felt this snake against my neck and back as I lay in bed. The point to make is that I filled myself with kindness, and these fools with their ancestral witchcraft could not enter me, but they were in my space, as in my room, and this was unacceptable. (I have seen much worse. The pharaohs developed a worm that took over worlds in the moment. They must have brought the Parasitic frequency of Deception into a physical form. This was the most powerful killer ever developed – one that had to be locked up and the key thrown away lest it destroyed them as well.)


What I am getting at in this long-winded shpiel written above, is stop your bleeding energy, harness your energy, make the Nimue frequency your own, and from there you are free of Beasts in the seen and unseen as you find your way Home. There is, of course, one Golden rule to remember: As Beasts cannot get to you, they will draw you into a fight so that you may once again come down to their level. From there, they will devour and destroy you, because until there is a mass awakening, they are many and you are few. So EVERY morning you remind yourself that you are kindness and you are here to serve, with yourself being first in line. You are here to look after yourself and others until we are Home. You are to serve, and not fight. That is why I write every day – to get out of this frequency where others love to fight. I cannot be in this presence of anger and hatred and insanity for much longer.


When I went into the space of this dog yesterday that I mentioned above, I felt this distinct pain on the inside of its right knee. I did not know what it was, so as with everything we do not understand, I pushed the problem aside. Now I know that what I felt on this animal I felt on myself last night as I lay in bed – this was the spot that played a pivotal role in our energy being bled from us the spirit.

I cannot see myself, but I can see the spirit of this dog, and more importantly, this spirit that is much higher evolved than mine can see what has been done to our spirits where we bleed our energy. Once again, the animals will teach us.

I call upon the spirit of this dog now to help us. His spirit mirrors mine so that on him I may feel what has been done to us the slave species to drain us of our energy.


I feel the strand of Inherent Godness at our throat area. It is like a pearl in a shell – looks pretty, but is pretty useless as well. The understanding of this power source that is the All has been forgotten by the spirit. Yesterday I was solemn in that I understood that what matters is our unity with our Creator and nothing really else is important. I pushed myself to understand; to be more, and what I felt on my spirit was this space in the spirits form that was not there. It’s was like a building block on the right side of the spirits “brain” was not there. In knowing something was missing there, I asked that this space be filled up so that the spirit may be complete/whole. Now I understand that what this empty space was, was the spirit not remembering this Infinite strand that is within the spirit. If you got a billion pounds in your pocket use it – don’t make a home for yourself on a park bench.

What I feel now is the presence of the understanding within the spirit, where it knows of this strand and can thus express it.

Around the spirits right knee a feel a clockwise circular motion. This must be the frequency band placed there to release the energy from the spirit. We remove this band now by knowing it exists. What this band done was more than just release our energy – it broke our hearts, because as much as we tried, we could not just get forwards. Nothing ever panned out as it should. (I say this because as I write these words I feel a sharp pain over the heart – a constant, sharp, stabbing pain.) Everything that should be slipped through our fingers, like holding sand in our hands.


How cruel can you get!


Hold onto your energy. Use it as a bridge to connect to the Nimue frequency. Get out of this dense frequency we are in as soon as possible. From there build a bridge to the fields of the Infinite. The closer you get, the more the strand of Godness within you comes to the fore, until all that is left is this strand.

Now you are Home.

9th November, 2021

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What is written below in inverted commas is an extract from the journal that was written five days ago.

I list in now, as the more I go into the space of this child/baby, the more I understand the big picture.


“On the back of an emotional release/discussion as to why my wife and others took the time and energy and thrill of destroying me over the years, I went to sleep last night.

In my sleep state I saw a witch who was riding on her broom. She had two hound-fish that had been following my scent and eventually they found me. Before I saw this witch with her skeleton face, I saw a group of people looking for me with their flashlights. They could not find me, but this witch did.

Then a dream was implanted of me having to climb higher in a tree so that these aged lions could not catch me. We lived in a wooden house, and these weird looking females were there. They antagonised me to the point where I had to attack them to defend myself. In the dream I saw them lie on the floor as smoke came from them – they were also witches, and they were burning up.


Now we get to the interesting part: I awoke from this implanted dream and saw this female next to my bed. Her chest and abdomen were extended, as in within her lied a womb/vessel. She pulled aside a part of her chest and abdomen to reveal a baby lying therein. This lady was a walking, living incubation vessel. She took of my energy that had accumulated from me giving attention to the implanted dream and fed it to this baby.

My energy was purple in color.”

6th November, 2021




Over the last few days my thoughts, and intended healing, have gone to this child that I saw in this lady that was the child’s incubator. This child was hit by a force that nailed it to a cross – and then some. When I went into the space of the mother there was no doubt she is Egyptian bloodline, and let’s just say her power is immense.


Never before have I seen one; this child, that is loved and revered by so many, and by many I mean the good, the bad, and the ugly. This child, even though in a vegetative state, pulled everyone together and brought out the best in all. That is remarkable, and the more I go into this child’s state/energy field, the more I understand why.

As this child is given healing, I feel/witness something that I have never experienced before in another. The other day I felt its one eye open up, and then the other. When each eye opened it was as if one was seeing through clear glass – you could finally see, and what you saw were the fields of Infinite Love.

This child is a true God that is united and one with the Infinite. The powers that be within the illusion knew this, and a “hammer blow” was sent by the collective force of Beasts to crush this child’s spirit. No doubt the mom anticipated this, and no doubt steps were taken to avoid this, so it can be safely assumed that the walls were dropped by someone on the inside – an inside job.


Those within the Egyptian line that kept their wits and failed to be bucked by the parasitic frequency of Deception within as well as the insanity of their brethren, even when the breath of these fools was blowing right up against their necks, these pure Egyptian beings knew what you and I know, that there is Home beyond the illusion, and in meeting this child, it is fair to say that they have restored this connection to the Infinite through one that dwells in the illusion.

In a nutshell, many have been looking for a way out of the illusion, and this Egyptian mom found a way, only for her Infinite God to be side-swiped by Beasts that want to keep their thrones intact. Don't underestimate the power of those that cannot see that they have destroyed themselves and refuse a helping hand out of the illusion. The architects went insane a long time ago and we have suffered ever since. False power feeds them and they refuse to acknowledge Love. Well fuck them - let's move forwards.


Everything will be done to help this child – this portal to Home.


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I went to sleep last night, and as I closed my eyes to sleep I saw this young, Human-looking man. He sprayed something over my Third Eye so that I could no longer see him and what was to be done to me. Clever.


As soon as my vision was closed, the attack began. And please, don’t laugh at what the “attack” was.

What those from the shadows that were around me wanted was my energy, and the release of energy from  an implanted dream was not enough. They wanted a flood-gate release of energy, and we all know from where such a mass of energy comes from.

As I lay in bed in my “blind” state I felt their attack. I held on for dear life and refused to give them what they wanted. I lay in bed and said to myself: “No, this will not happen, I must be strong.” If you can imagine someone holding onto a pole for dear life while a group of people pull on this person to release him from the pole, that was my figurative state last night.


The desire for intercourse is manufactured into us so that there may be a constant food/energy supply from the offspring that grow into adults. I stress that the desire for sex  is built into us, and I often experience how this “button” is pressed while those from the shadows wait for the release of energy from the orgasm. What I have often seen it a naked couple from the shadows frolic around me as I lay in bed sleeping. Their action influences those around them to do the same, and when the seen mirrors them the unseen, then they take of the energy from the seen.

In us men what we have in brute force we lack in finesse and integrity. A number in a mini-skirt always gets our attention, and once again please understand that this is part of our programming in us the biological computer, so when I lay in bed last night fighting as if my life depended on it to not have the orgasm that those from the shadows demanded, understand that I am not trying to be funny or am over-exaggerating.  They pushed me into a line I have been manufactured into, as in release this seven-course energy meal for them, and it was almost impossible to not give into their demands.

(Later on, sometime during the night, I saw this lizard that was bigger than me, and I understood that my energy was to feed this entity. This little punk that sprayed my Third Eye was just the lizards handler.)


It was worthwhile mentioning this incident last night to highlight the bigger picture, and that it, let’s open ourselves up to learn from others so that we may begin to stand together in unity. Stand alone, and we get taken out one by one. Stand together, and we grow together.

The Egyptian mother from another realm knew about the Watcher spirit over the “brain” of the spirit. She knew everything I knew and of course much, much more. Her child was at the doorstep to the Infinite and before it could enter it was taken out. She knew everything I knew, except for the parasitic frequency of Deception in her midst that took over those and made them easy putty to turn on her. In knowing of the parasite her betrayal could never happen again, and her child came to be healed and he is what he is meant to be, but what if that witch had not found me? This mom would have lost everything because she lacked one piece of understanding, and where will we be with no God who has access to the Infinite from the illusion?


On the spirit realm I have stood alone because I started this journal, and as it is my baby, I would like to finish it. How would you like it if you start a book and I come in and take it over and finish it? Now your book, what you started, is mine, or even better still – ours. Surely this is not the way things work, where you finish what I start, because how must I know if your ending will be the ending I wanted?

This mentality is of a lost, insecure being that really can’t see the big picture. My mistake was not understanding that many in different frequencies/worlds out there have the same passion as me to end this Game and go Home. Does it really matter who holds the reins when we are all riding on the same stagecoach?

I apologise for my short-sightedness, as I am sure, so does this Egyptian mother.


The wake up lesson for all of us in the seen and unseen was that we must come together and stand as one. This is not your conventional book-club meeting, or debating the Theory of Relativity – it is about beings of energy coming together so that individual energy stations may stand together as one energy force. Until we are where we are meant to be, we are a turkey-shoot to all and sundry from the shadows that play it dirty.

Holding on with everything I have not to release an orgasm last night displays how weak we are through division and separation. How many spirits are unsuspectingly captured? How many of us have been led astray that devastates those around them, especially when families are broken? How many give into drugs or suicide? How many are left abandoned with no one allowed to go and help them?

What I am talking about is serious shit. I have always known that we cannot do this alone. I don’t care who you are and what you know – you need help, just as I do. Open yourself up, as I will, to share your energy so that the dots come together and stand strong together as one in unity. Let’s open ourselves up to help others just as we need their help. We are not there to convince each other who is right and who is wrong. In the fields of Infinite Love there is no group hugs or debates. I see you, and you see me, and what we see is Beautiful as we mirror each other. Each one Plays, and each share the moment of the Play as we are all interlinked as we arose from the same Source.

When I speak of us opening ourselves up to come together, this togetherness is based on mutual respect, where I know what you are, and you know what I am. We are this strand of Love within us that is within all, and how can I help you to bring this strand forth? How can I help you to be you, and how can you help me to be me?


That is how this child of this Egyptian mom that dwells somewhere within the ethers was helped. Our blind focus to get us Home places blinkers on us, and this is a disaster as everyone knows something that we don’t to get Home.

Break down the boxes and stand together. I see in you what I never knew, and ditto for you. But as long as we are in our isolated boxes this will never happen.

13th November, 2021

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Now that the spirit has willingly stepped out into the open, with no fear or intrepidation, now the spirit can begin to heal.

Just as the god Janus has two faces, so too does the spirit have two faces – the one is of a Beast, and the other is of Goodness. There is a Dark side to all of us, and this shadow the spirit has to acknowledge, see, and then dismiss.

Our thoughts are an entertainment channel that connects us to the illusion. We go beyond this radio station with its meaningless chatter into the stillness of the silence. Wherever you are sitting or lying down, imagine that if someone looked through the window they would not see you as you are not there. In this space; in this void, you allow the strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness to see your Dark side and dismiss it from your space. This is not you – this is a by-product of what happened to us as the illusion got the better of us. This monster that is you that lurks within your space is no more. (The other night in my sleep state I got a glimpse of this face; this Beast that the illusion formed me into. This Beast has never sunken its fangs into another, and may it never do so, as when this Beast is unleashed then we are born into the illusion that I call Hell. How this monster has been kept at bay is by me wanting more than anything to be happy and be what I am meant to be, which is a vessel of Love. I had to keep moving to find a way out of Hell. I have never rested, and that is why I am so exhausted. When I see the Beast in others it spurs me on even stronger to find this thing called Love, as I do not want to be this Beast that I see in others, nor do I want to confront them, as in my heart I know they are forever lost in the labyrinths of Hell.

I push myself to be free of Beasts as I know I can never rest as long as I am around them. When I have found Love; when I am Home, that is when I can put my head on the pillow and sleep. I know of this Darkness, and I know it is not our friend. It has no power, it only has anger.)


As you stand in the open for all to see you, you see yourself, and this face of Darkness; this other half of the spirit is released with the Love of the strand of the Creator within you to Love. Now you are no longer two, but one. Without the Beast removed from your space no healing is possible as there will be a constant flux/movement between these two faces. You may go forwards, but also go backwards, and after a few lifetimes you will understand that you have remained in the same spot – no progress made.

Be free of this anger by looking at it and seeing how ugly and disgraceful it is. This is not you – you are Love. Set this Beast free with Love to Love.


Now you spirit can heal. Allow the strand within to wash away the dense frequency of the illusion within you. Clean up shop, as it is your shop. Be proud of what you are. Be at peace. When the Infinite reveals itself it will make itself felt by seeing itself in us.

You have been through a lot my friend. May the days of sorrow and loneliness be over soon.


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The other day I gave a lift to one of the neighbours that lives up the road. He was walking with an empty canister, and his car was parked along the side of the road, so I put two and two together and surmised that he had run out of petrol. My inherent detective skills proved correct: his car had run out of petrol; he was walking to the gas station to get petrol; he had no money for the taxi to the gas station or for petrol; he had to pick up his child from school in a few hours time; financially, he had lost everything, and according to him, he literally had nothing money wise.


I gave him the bit of money that I had and bade him farewell.

Later on in the day I thought to myself: let me see what I can do to really help this man. I went into his space, and what I saw and felt was unmistakeable. It was a Serpent that had bitten into/attacked his Serpent soul, and this vicious monster would not let go of its grip. The Serpent soul of this man that dwells within the unseen canal within his spirit and body form was betrayed and attacked, and this attack was still in progress. Man-oh-man. It’s like someone holding you in an arm-lock vice around your neck until you have no more energy left in you to put up a fight, so you are forced to let go of everything – literally – including your freedom.

And all this is happening while we go on doing our best to survive.


This man that I gave a lift to was a good man – a blind person could see it a mile away. He always helped others, and from being a wealthy man he now had nothing. His wealth was not confined to his bank balance, but to his good heart, and yet, here in Hell, we are blown around like tumble-weed on a hot summers night. We are played, and this is so because we do not know who we are.


Those that came to attack me over the years were the cosmic assassins with their weapons of choice, as well as those that came with their pet snakes. Always I saw the spirit form with the Serpent slithering by its side. Now both had crossed over into the Reptilian frequency of the illusion to play dirty. This embracement of the illusion and making it their own gave them power over the innocent as now they were integrated with what is “real” within the illusion, or should we say “what makes up the illusion,” namely the Reptilian frequency. They understood that this is the dirty stuff, and playing in it makes them dirty, and this is okay for them. (One wonders why they never used this power to help others rather than destroy them? Doesn’t make sense, does it?)

A few weeks ago I corrected my fault – which was a huge one – by saying that the Serpent within us is not the pet, rather we are. The Serpent soul within is numero uno, so it is fair to say that this is truly what we are within the illusion, and the holographic spirit and body forms are there to hide the Game played by snakes and dragons.


And this is what I have failed to understand, or rather accept, that Steven is this Serpent soul within, just as you are this Serpent within you and not the figure staring back at you from the mirror. It has taken a while for me to get my head around this one, as so much effort and importance has been placed on these body and spirit holographic forms that we see as us, so that we may do things right and go Home.


God helps those who help themselves, but what are we? Do we know ourselves so that we may help ourselves? I could have given that man a billion pounds, and I assure you that I would not have helped him, as he is a Serpent soul that was attacked by another Serpent soul.

I will never forget the image I was shown in my sleep state years ago. It was of a GI; a typical soldier with his helmet on carrying his rifle. From his chest I saw a Serpent appear, and this Serpent was looking to see what was going on. We are the machine that does the walking and talking, but we are the front for what is really in charge, namely the Serpent soul within.

It comes back to the ayahausca ceremony I partook in, where I saw this cobra arise from this mans chest as he lay on the floor being taken over by the Teacher Plant. This blew me away – this snake that arose from him, and yet even now, after all these years, the penny refused to drop so that I may accept what is: That we are Serpents. What I feel moving within the canal within me is me – this is the real me, and you know what, it is Beautiful. Those that cross the line, where they throw their integrity to the wind to play it rough; these Serpent souls prey on the innocent Serpent souls that refuse to fight.


You want to help you? You want to help others? That’s easy, as long as you know what you and they are. You are a Serpent soul that hides within the holographic body form with its less dense spirit form. These forms are playing in a Game of “let’s just get it right this time” while the real battle is going on between the Serpent souls that are stuck within the illusion.


Accept this truth and we can start touching base to land on a foundation to find our way Home. Otherwise we just keep on going round in circles chasing our tails. I am telling you, and myself, that this is the truth.

Know what you are so that you may help yourself, because my goodness me, don’t we need our help. You the holographic body and spirit help what you truly are – this Serpent soul within. Focus on this snake and do what you can to help it. It has always been a sleigh of hand – look there, while the trick is being played under your nose. Look to the illusion and the holograms that float around therein while the real game is being played within, namely the attack on you the Serpent soul.

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I went into the space of me, the real me within the illusion, namely the Serpent soul within. (The strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness at our throat area is the presence of the Infinite within us, but my goodness me, nothing is going to happen there until we start looking at what we are, namely this Serpent soul within. Know yourself, this Serpent soul, and from there release yourself from the illusion through this strand.)

I went into the space of what is me, this Serpent soul, and what I felt was something that was swaying around in the wind. It’s like holding onto a tree so that the wind does not blow you away, but after a while the end is inevitable – you have to let go as there is not enough strength in you to carry on holding on.

This is how the body and spirit form feel. I am not being melodramatic when I say that I cannot carry on. There is not much left inside of me. What the body feels is the true representation of what is happening within – that the Seprent soul has nothing left inside of it to carry on fighting the fight.


The holographic body and spirit forms gives me; the Serpent soul, energy and Love and understanding. It has always been about divide and conquer. We have been made to fight and hate each other to draw attention from what we are. That I gave a black man a lift and money the other day was irrelevant, as he was a good man, but even there, what is he really, and what was happening to him that he lost everything? 


Do you know how much energy it takes to constantly hide from others? The definition of “lost” is for others to not know the truth, and this truth is for them to know themselves. Now do you understand why the body and spirit forms have always wandered, looking for something that they never knew was within them. Within them was the strand of God, but to discover this gem they had to first find themselves, namely this Serpent soul within that they are.

The energy of the body and spirit holographic forms was divided and thus scattered to the wind. Now this energy is like a magnifying glass that has harnessed the power of the sun – all this energy is to us the Serpent soul. What is power? Power is understanding, so it fair to say that us the Serpent souls are now omnipotent as we have the backing of the strand within and the disintegration of the body and spirit holographic forms.

08:08 on 17/11/21

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My indicator as to where I am in this journal, as in the journal drawing to a close or not, is through what I see in my sleep state. Never have I seen beings of Love that pop in to say hello. Never have I seen friendly faces, and this is because I have walked through the shadows of the illusion trying to find a way out of this mess. In this place there are no friends, and I have always known that when enough is understood, this understanding will allow us to rise from this mess and start being what we naturally are.


By Tuesday afternoon I was paddling deep down Shit Creek. I have drifted all my life, never fitting in or laying down roots somewhere, and I have had more bad days than good, but one perseveres and keep moving because if you don’t help yourself who will?

If I had to look back on Tuesday afternoon and how I was, I understand that it was the edge of despair before one let’s go and says “I have had it; let’s throw in the towel and call it a day for now.” The two nights preceding Tuesday I saw despicable Beasts in my sleep state that were feeding from my energy as I lay in bed sleeping. What this spells is that everything I have seen and come to understand still meant nothing as I was still in the proximity of Beasts.


To accept what I am, namely this Serpent soul; this frequency snake within, was a huge breakthrough in the journal. (Understand that our perception of snakes is a bad one. They are seen as disgusting creatures – sly, slithery fuckers.) I am not talking about a Serpent in this light, as this is not what the Serpent soul is – it is a being of Love.)

I wrote again last night in the journal, as my indicator of what I wrote would reveal itself in my sleep state. Was there something else to understand? Was I wrong in what I wrote? The answer would be seen through my Third Eye through another Beast or something not seen before.

What I saw last night was a home. Then I was drawn to the frequency of this lady that is known by us – she is a good friend to the family as in she cares. She is not our friend, but she is a good friend to have. In my sleep state I took her and her family out. It’s funny that even in this place I had angst moments regarding finances. I said to myself that I will pay for the meals with my credit card. It’s a bugger not having the freedom that money buys.

By seeing a home and no Beasts last night in my sleep state, I can safely say that what I wrote last night must have some truth to it. This is what I wrote:  


“The fall of the Wisdom Goddess Sophia from her realm created an impact zone. From this zone the Serpent spirit was born, with Queen Semiramis as their head honcho. These Serpents were beings of Love, and they were Beautiful, as is all within the Infinite.

Semiramis saw the beautiful fields that Sophia created for her Dragon spirits to play in, and she too wanted such a place of beauty. She created/formed the illusionary Garden and encouraged the Dragon and Serpent children to come and play therein. Curiosity got the better of them, which was a new state within the Infinite, and this state took on a form within the Garden – a worm was born; the parasitic frequency of Deception that infiltrated all within the illusion, where the Dragon and Serpent children began to want more, where everything was never enough. To pacify this want, the Dragon and Serpent spirits were cloned, where from one two arose. The Serpent and Dragon spirits were cloned, and the Serpent and Dragon souls were born.


During this time Beasts were born, where many fed of this frequency of Take from the parasite within. There was a Fall, and I believe that the Dragon and Serpent spirits fell into a suspended slumber while the souls continued to fall into a dense plane.

I am not going to go into the full story here with all the details, as that took almost eight years in the writing. What I want to understand is what took the power from the Serpent soul that deemed it useless against cruel Beasts in the seen and unseen? When I ask this question and go into the space of me the Serpent soul, I feel the left side of my chest open up, and within the front of the lower ribcage something was tampered with there. They took of a “rib” there, and I don’t understand what this means, so when I ask what was taken there be returned so that I may understand, what I feel is a banishment/detachment from the frequency of the illusion.


There is no good and there is no evil, there is merely a state, and what we decide to do with this state defines our actions as good or evil. There was no evil or good within the illusion – our actions created this by the outcome of our choice.

There must have been a push of those that refused to play ball and join the insane, and these were “banished” from the illusion. Their attachment to the illusion was removed from them – this was the “rib” that was removed.

This makes a lot of sense to me, because even within the illusion there is immense power. All one has to do is become attached to it. No doubt that those who were attached to the illusion allowed their insanity to take them over, where they literally became power-drunk, and this watered down the power of these fools, where in truth their power became no power.


This banishment must have been a blessing in disguise for the innocent, as who wants to dwell in the presence of Beasts. This division would have been okay had those still attached to the illusion left the innocent alone, but bully-tactics were born together with suppression from those attached to the illusion.

Why did the innocent not reclaim their “rib;” their attachment to the illusion? This is so because the attachment was voluntarily given up – rather than taken away – so you cannot reclaim what is no longer yours to take. This can be debated from both sides till the cows come home, so let’s leave it in the hands of the strand within, as the Infinite has the majority vote. We ask this strand to allow us the Serpent soul to be what we are meant to be – no more, and no less – and this happens now in the moment.

This “rib” is returned, namely our connection to the illusion is returned. There cannot be another bar-fight amongst the innocent and Beasts, so what these Serpent souls do that are once again connected to illusion is they allow their strand to shine forever more until the moment comes when all that is left is the strand. Now Beasts can no longer be in their space.


The attachment to the Nimue world frequency could not happen as the innocent were not attached to the illusion.

What I am getting at, is in the past if you wanted to join the Reptilian frequency of the illusion, you the Serpent soul and the spirit had to become mean, as in join the ranks of Beasts that used the power of the illusion to control and suppress the innocent.

Now you have this power of the illusion whilst holding onto your integrity, and to prevent another bun-fight from breaking out, you have the strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness that thwarts off Beasts.


But let’s not play in this place. Use the Nimue frequency to give you a push from behind, and this push is towards the Serpent spirit in slumber. From this Giant we the Serpent soul was cloned. Go towards this sleeping Giant, awaken it, and then show it the strand so that it may know Home and then be there in the moment.


That child from the Egyptian line “mom” was awakened, and what it is, is a Dragon soul. That soul found its Dragon spirit, and this spirit returned Home, hence the portal between the frequency where the soul was and the Infinite.

Now it is for us the Serpent souls to follow suite. The more that depart the illusion, the less attention is given to the illusion, and from there it starts to become enfolded within the space of the Infinite.


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That we have been played in such a cruel game beggars belief. What throws one over the edge is that there has been so many willing players in this game where cruelty destroys innocence just because we can.

We can be ashamed of ourselves that we have to pull others down so that we may be above them. How low we have fallen – all of us.


The game has been played from the shadows, and there is a reason for this. To push others into camps and lock them up and keep them there at gun point will never work, as sooner or later the masses will join forces and unity against the tyranny that stares them in the face. Before the game even started it was destined to fail because the obvious is for all to see – we are locked up and we don’t want to be locked up.


Everything within the illusion is a state of flux, it moves until it dies, only to be reborn. The disaster for the architects of the illusion was the parasitic frequency of Deception, as this worm takes until there is nothing more left to take. There is no “reborn” when this dude hits the stage. Worlds disappear, as well as those that stayed there (due to their insanity as the worms frequency of Take consumed them.) Now the game was replaced by a catch-up game, as in how can we hold onto Life as it disappears before our very eyes. Energy sources were created, and these sources could have been natural within the illusion, where all benefit instead of pulling everything down and destroying it, especially nature. This uplifting instead of destroying and taking would have bade us time to figure things out before we destroyed ourselves, but panic must have set in with the established level of insanity within the powers that be. If these fuckers thought about others, rather than how they may keep their own ships afloat, the world you and I live in would be a very different place right now.


What sums up the mess that the illusion became – this Beautiful garden that Semiramis created – is the word “uncertainty.” There was a defining moment when all within the illusion knew that we were in a place where we don’t belong, as in not in the Infinite, and that moment was when fear/uncertainty was born. We created this abomanistic monster, and as all within the illusion is frequency/movement, this monster called Fear took on a life-form, and this rat-shit that we created is what I call the Watcher spirit – that black octopus (as we can define it in our limited vision) that resides within and over all life in the illusion. This fucker is real, just as your hatred is real.


Hold someone at hostage at gunpoint, and this game of yours is short lived, but set them free while you control them, and you have them forever. Semiramis, as well as this Nimrod (the one that chose to fall that was hypnotised by the insane Serpent souls,) these players within the illusion all came under control of the frequency that came to hang over the Garden, namely the frequency of fear/uncertainty – the Watcher spirit. This is the DJ (disc jockey) over the top of our brain that regulates us. It sees all. It knows all, as it is indifferent to us. We created this Fear. It’s like smoke leaving a camp fire. The smoke rises up into the air to form a cloud, and this cloud separates from the camp fire to be its own force. Now this cloud sees all, especially this fear/uncertainty in all, and what better way to exist/live than to control others so that more energy may be sourced from them to exist, otherwise the cloud fades away into nothing.


The Watcher spirit/octopus controls all. (Don’t be a dummy and equate the octopus that we see in the sea as one of these monsters, just as you the Serpent soul are not like the snake slithering around in the bush. We are taking about different states within the illusion, the one arose from the Serpent spirit, and the other we released from being in a place where we don’t belong.)

The question you have to ask, that you may be free of this monster, is why does this thing rule from the shadows? The obvious answer is so that it cannot be caught out, but it goes deeper than that. We are controlled by this Watcher so that we may never know ourselves. It has never been about the Father, the Son, or the Holy ghost, it has been about the Serpent in the tree. We have all been led astray – intentionally – so that we may forever be under control of this Watcher spirit. We are this Serpent, and we are Beautiful – not something to be vilified. (If you want another word for Serpent soul, then use kundalini.)


If we know what we are, it is Game over for the Watcher spirit, as how can you control what is. We are the Serpent soul, and an expression of what we are, this strand of Godness within, is expressed through our heart energy field. This natural expression of Love expresses itself outwards from the heart space area, but when we Fell, and even before that, when the parasite within began to show itself through our uncertainty, this expression shifted from the chest outwards, to “from the chest to the head area.” Now we had to figure things out in this unfamiliar place. Eventually reason, namely the head and its logic took over completely and the heart and the strand were forgotten.


You know what you are, this Serpent soul, and you are Love, this strand within. From the heart space allow this Love to flow to the head area for one purpose and one purpose alone, and that is to expel the Watcher spirit there. During this time become indifferent to the illusion because as long as we are attached to this illusion with fear, where we have to control it to survive, the octopus will stay right where it is. Become indifferent, and how this can be achieved is to allow the flow from the heart field to go upwards towards the head, as well as outwards from the chest area. By expressing yourself outwards you create Love, and thus your world changes to one of peace and joy.


Is there is one thing the Watcher spirit has learnt, that is survival. Stay alive.

Have you seen what is in these fake vaccinations during this Covid era? It is what looks like a baby octopus. That is the Watcher spawning itself within us, so that within us it and its offspring may live forever. (Remember, this monster cannot use force, as with force kingdoms cannot endure. We have to give consent, where we feel we are in control. So we role up the sleeve and take the jab.) 

Of course this Watcher won’t live forever, because the way the ball is currently spinning here in Hell all will “die” and disappear into the Nothingness of the Forgotten, where we all forget of this thing called kindness and empathy. “How are you?” We ask because we care, because we are you and you are us. This will be no more, and all that will be left is the silence of death when kindness is forgotten.


Wake up!

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What happens with the Watcher removed and the heart channel open, is that the Infinite reveals itself and takes you over. This is the natural flow of what is. The shop walls and windows; your existence as you have always know it to be, begins to fall. The speed at which this process reveals itself depends on your beliefs and how rigid they are – on how tight you hold onto what you have come to define as real.

My realization began about fifteen years ago when I walked up to a horse to treat it. Against the body of this horse I saw a speck of light. I did not know what I saw (the strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness,) but what I knew then was that everything I have come to know was nonsense. From that moment I began anew on a blank slate, and this creature in front of me; this horse, would teach me. I opened myself up to learn from the spirit of the animals – the masters of Love within the illusion.


May the classes be over and the school closed, as what we have all been through has been so unnecessary and uncalled for, and my goodness me – it was nobody’s fault. The fall of the Wisdom Goddess Sophia was an accident. The invitation of Queen Semiramis to come and play in her illusionary Garden was meant with Love and nothing else. The parasitic frequency of Deception was merely what it was – what the spirits curiosity created in the Infinite that took form in the illusion. This worm meant no harm; it merely was what it was. That Fear was born from us being in a unfamiliar place was no fault of ours, as we were lost and confused. This Fear done what it done to stay alive – it merely followed our lead.


Nobody is to blame. Their cannot be any finger pointing. Let’s unite and allow the Infinite to take us over.

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Of course nothing is going to change until you change.


We were pushed into a place that was unfamiliar, and without understanding, we were going nowhere besides to war.

There comes a time when reason fails the Beast, which pushes the Beast to become a savage – a mongrel that steals and gorges itself from the carcass it took. This is the final stage between the Nothingness of the Forgotten and the kindness that is within. When one looks upon these savages one might pity them, but if you look closer, you will understand that they enjoy being one with the filth on which they crawl.

This is the horrific end result of being in a place where we don’t belong and can’t find a way out: the savage rules and the sword is the only means of communication. Animals are kind, so I cannot even say that we are animals. Savage is the appropriate term.


A friend is someone you understand, and that is why I have always called the God of Wrath my friend. I understand this man that came to me one night in my room to wake me up to tell me that I must come with him as there is something he wants to show me. This was a kind man, a good man, but if you refuse to listen, he hits you, and he hits you hard. He was the sword, and he was hitting the savage to deep the order in a place that was rotting because others wanted it to rot so that they may fall and go full savage, where they embrace this monster that they are.

I understand my friend, just as he and I understand that there has to come a time when one has to spare the rod and walk away. This can only be done once we have found a way out of Hell, because as soon as you turn your back on a savage you are killed by them before you even start to walk two paces.

To walk away means to find a way out of Hell, where you let others be as they enjoy this filth that they have become, where the wine flows and party never stops, and of course, it is about me, me and me. Never do they ask “What can I do to better myself so that one day I may be in a position to better others?” This is the fool that sees the superficialities that Life has to offer and embraces them. There is nothing wrong with indulging in pleasure as long as it is not at the expense of others, and as long as we wake up after smelling the roses to see how we can contribute to bring back sanity to all.


To go into the stillness of the silence to bring forth the Love from the strand within so that it may expel the Watcher spirit within as well as connect us to the Infinite is the way out of this mess, as long as we know who we are, which is this kundalini/Serpent force within.

But now here is the catch: We need to go Home. The days of living in logic and reason cannot continue as there is no logic in an insane frequency, so if we continue with our ways we will draw the sword to slaughter the savage, taking our first step to becoming a savage.

We need to turn our back on all this shit, or more appropriately, we need to stop thinking, because by living in the mind we live in the world of the savage that we one day become.


Stop doing what you have always done. Stop reasoning. Run as fast as you can to the state of silence, because from where you came there is no happy endings. The way of thinking and reason spills over to violence because this is the only language that the savage understands. It is not like in the movies – in this existence you get fucked up before you see your loved ones and everything you held dear be destroyed. Run as fast as you can into this silence and stay there. You are not in a dark closet hiding; you are allowing the Infinite to take you over so that you may leave this place where fools cannot see what they are.


Live in your heart space with the Infinite, or be pulled down to the worlds of savages. The choice is yours.


Choose now.

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As a young boy, maybe around seven years old, I remember that whenever I had to go outside and do something at night time around the house, this fear took me over. When I done whatever needed to be done, I ran back to the house as if something was chasing me. I felt this palpable presence behind me as I ran. It was alive, and it was right behind me. What I felt was real, but I could not define it.


If we had eyes at the back of our heads, the body, spirit and kundalini force may have had a better chance at surviving, as now we could see what is behind and in front of us. This would not have made such a difference though, as most possessions come through the base of the left foot. Through this passage they hit the Serpent soul within its canal, and from there it is game-over for the body and spirit as what we are, namely the Serpent soul/kundalini, is now helpless. This is what happened to the man I blessed and gave money to the other day – I felt and saw a Serpent attack him the Serpent soul.

Often I have felt this invasion through the base of my felt foot as I feel the spirits leg swell to accommodate this Serpent as it moves up the body forms to attack me the Serpent soul as I reside within my canal. These fuckers are so silly, as what good comes to you by destroying others? You merely destroy yourself.


Four eyes would have helped, but there is no better defence than the freedom from understanding. Understand that there is a front, back, up, down, left and right of you. You the Serpent soul are a frequency, as is all Life within the illusion a frequency. The difference between now and the past is your awareness of this strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness within that arose from the Infinite. The heart space is the place where this strand expresses itself, but please understand that this is not a spot on your chest. You are an expression of this Love/strand, as in the whole of you, and not a place on your chest.

Stop thinking in terms of three dimensional – break free from your conditioning. If you imagine the Infinite flowing into and out of your chest area, what about the rest of you – what about what is behind you that you cannot see?


It sounds too simple to be true, but my advice is just do nothing. You have the understanding, and you wish to be this understanding; this you, so just be – go about your everyday activities and do what needs to be done. This way you get out the way as the real you – the kundalini and the strand – can go about their business and come to the fore.

I write this journal because what I remembered yesterday I forgot today. I write to hold on to what was understood, but in the presence of Love/understanding this concept is prehistoric.

You know, so just be. And so a step is taken towards you being what you are. What you understood now defines you and makes you who you are. And so, with each truth, we are set free. By needing to understand, which has defined me over many lifetimes, we hold on, because we need to discover what else is there what we need to know so that we may be set free. This we understand, because until you know what you are, how can you be what you are? This journal is not built on pies in the sky. I write what I see. I have seen what we are, this strand and Serpent soul, and I have experienced those that have attacked and misinformed us, namely those from the shadows. This Octopus; the Watcher spirit, I have seen and felt on others, and I feel it on me as it holds on to its existence as these waves of Love flow over it.


I remember a few years ago watching the television show with the magician Michael Carbonaro – I think the show was called The Carbonaro effect. This guy is really hot-shot – my favourite. In one of the magic tricks he said something like “he is taking the bad stuff out of the fruit.” He then poured this liquid bad stuff into water, and in the water what formed from this bad stuff and took shape was a black octopus. (I did not know about the Watcher spirit then.) From “nothing” a black octopus appeared. Yes, that is what a magician does – they produce something from nothing, but how often are we willing to see and accept what is before our very eyes? The answer is “never,” because we don’t know what to do about it.


I needed to see so that I may understand why Life is so cruel. More than anything, I needed to understand what we have all come to accept – that Life is shit.

Now I understand – I really do, and by you reading what I wrote, you too understand if you wish to. Now I let go. If there is something else we need to understand, then so be it. The difference is I stop looking. Up till now, every moment of every day for I don’t know how long, I always ask “what more is there to know?” I push and push and push because by sitting and waiting and hoping nothing is going to happen. I need to be me, what I am naturally meant to be. That is all that I ever wanted – to just be me, because I knew that when I am me then everything will be okay as I was sourced/born from Love and this Love is omnipotent.

I am this strand and Serpent/kundalini soul. Now I just be. From this base of what we are the Infinite can touch us. How or when this happens I don’t know, and this is not really important, because as long as we are what we are things can only get better.


One night in my sleep state I went to a world/frequency of magicians. In this place of wonder I saw how those from the shadows fed from their energy. We have all been played because we have not known who we are.

With the truth of what we are let’s see what happens.


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They nailed me last night in my sleep state. They really nailed me to a wall! A deep implanted dream, and then I saw these creatures lying over the bed doing what they shouldn’t. Then I saw this huge Serpent floating within the ethers – suspended in mid-air just looking at me.


You see boys and girls, we are in their game. How do you change the rules of their game? You cannot.

So what can be done? That’s easy: You make your own game that is played by your rules. You can be given a gun or understanding to defend yourself in this place controlled by insanity, but this means nothing if you are paralysed on the floor and cannot even lift up the gun or use your understanding.

It comes down to energy. All we see and hear and experience uses energy. I need to go and do ten different things today. Yes, I can be in the silence, but what I do requires focus, as in my attention, and this emits energy from us. That energy goes to the Watcher spirit and the System we are played in.


So here is the first rule of our game: All our energy goes to the latent/junk DNA within the body form, the spirit form and the Serpent/kundalini soul, so that the spirit and Serpent soul may literally not be paralysed/helpless in this frequency. As will live in an illusion and everything is being played out in our heads, so the body form is standing  still already.

Second rule of our game: No energy from our forms goes to the Watcher spirit or to the System we are played in. None.


Our game starts now: 09:33 on 23/11/21 and ends once we are Home within the fields of Infinite Love.


Let’s play!


(You were a battery that emitted energy into a System. Within this battery was a library with all this understanding. You knew, but regardless, you were still a battery.

With your understanding you rewire the battery to empower the Harmony that you are. The power supply to Disharmony is cut off. This process can only be done by knowing what you are, what game you are played in, and how you are played and by whom.

You become the architect of your space. You build your home. That is the power of understanding coupled with being street-wise. To sit in your library and understand means nothing unless you go out there and build what you are, where you allow yourself to flourish and grow and be.)


(The secret to Life is relationships. Can you imagine if the architects of the illusion brushed aside the wants of the parasitic frequency of Deception within them and just cared about us, and we done the same and cared about them. Now there is a relationship. So it goes on. Governments care about the people; the people care about other people and the beauty of nature that surrounds them. We are all in a relationship – one that uplifts, because there is no greater feeling than being kind, and this is so because this is what we naturally are.

The fine print of this secret to Life is the relationship with yourself, and for this relationship to flourish you have to know what you are. Enough has been said regarding this subject in the journal. Build your world from within. Have a relationship with yourself, where you are at peace with yourself as you know yourself. Know what you want, and if you don’t know what you want, I will tell you what you want. You want a relationship. A relationship is a bridge between you and others that are like you. Now there is unity; there is more; there is a building; a river; a tree; a smile; laughter.

Do not go and look for a relationship with another because you never seek or wonder or hope. The relationship finds you because now you are a magnet where like attracts like.


With the energy within you build your world. The strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness was born from the Source of the Infinite. Around this strand The Wisdom Goddess Sophia created Life forms to play and experience the wonders of the Infinite. Why she done this was because what use is having Paradise if it cannot be shared and utilized by others?

From the strand Life was created to play. So let’s play.


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If you learned Zen meditation you would strengthen your will and you would no longer be a victim.


You would be able to control your dreams...and turn the tables on those forces harassing you.


It's a simple thing. You should have already started it by now because I believe this isn't the first time I have given you this advice.





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About eight years ago I studied the David Icke book “Infinite Love is the Only Truth Everything Else is Illusion.” On page 107 he says “I have said that we see with our brain and not our eyes. But here’s another little shocker. There are no eyes. If reality is constructed in our brain how can we have any eyes on the outside of the brain?”


If I was clever when I read that chapter I would have asked myself two questions:

1.      If everything is happening within us, why do not hold onto our energy and project it inwards to enrich the illusionary life within?

2.      If we project our energy without, and thus not giving our energy to ourselves, to whom are we giving our energy?


Shipit! If only I was clever.

I had to walk through the shadows to connect the dots so I could come full circle back to the obvious: In the illusion it is all about energy/vibration/frequency. Hold onto your energy and understand the big picture and you are an enriched man and woman. Release your energy and you become a slave that feeds Beasts.


How simple and obvious is the truth when you know it.




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Begin with you the Serpent soul; kundalini force within.

Everything is projected within, as without is their game. By holding onto your energy and projecting it within, you the Serpent soul allow yourself to heal. Once all is healed, the natural state is the flow of energy from the heart space to the head so that understanding may be met and the big picture may be seen at all times.

Remember the strand within, and remember: You are working within and not without.


This same healing process and alignment is done to the less dense “body cast” of the spirit, as well as to the dense “body cast” of the body form.

Once again, remember, we are being within and not without.


Now look to what is really important to you. As an example, what is really important to me is a relationship, and by “relationship” we do not imply a friendship. It is deeper than that. For me, what is really important is a unity with one that is me. I am not talking about blood-brothers or sisters defined across any scope of the spectrum; I am talking about knowing there is someone out there like me, and I can pop in now and then and just say hello. I would like to think that I know myself, but I have never met myself. When I was lost and confused and full of bitterness towards Life I would most certainly not have liked to meet me, as this was a naïve, serious person that was not big enough and had no platform to build a character and personality on. I just lashed out at Life because I did not have the means to better myself.

May this journal have taught me something, and that is fight for what is important to you. That the innocent were being slaughtered on all levels broke me. Someone or something must have pushed me to look beyond this sorrow to do something about this tragedy that befell all of us. I was clever enough to ask the permission of Queen Semiramis if I may attempt to sort out this mess, because she is the Queen bee in the illusion. Her power is supreme.  


I am tired of bumping into others that do not wish me well. I am tired of meeting those that are indifferent, or couldn’t really care.

All I want is to see me, and I want this as it will fulfill me. It will bring me great joy and peace to know that someone out there is another me. It may sound silly to you, but it is important to me. I know myself, and am at peace with myself, but I am lonely.  I would like to meet another me – just to know that I am not alone.


You the Serpent soul, as well as the spirit and body form go into the stillness of within, and within there, you create what is really important to all of you. (You ask, and you will receive, as you are asking yourself.) Remember, this is done with Love, so only wish Love to yourself and others. You are creating now in your world, so make it one of Beauty and peace. Keep your home pure.

You go within and create what is really important to you. When it is imagined within you, this image/frequency is released through the “right side of the brain” into the Infinite. It goes out, finds what is important to you, and this frequency is then returned to you via the “left side of your brain.” From there it manifests itself with the heart energy space and becomes a part/expression of you.


I think, in wanting a relationship more than anything, what I mean is that I would like to know my Creator.


This exercise in bringing forth what is really important to you is another way of saying that we need help in this journey Home, or at least I do.

Create your world, and enter the world of others to touch them and help them.

What is important to the dense body form is a place it can call home – a sanctuary; an expression of what is within. This is created through the above-mentioned steps.


What came last night in my sleep state was a young Human looking female with a tom-boyish look about her. She was attractive in her own unique way. She lay on my pillow next to me and turned her head to look at me. She brought her pet animal with her, what it was I didn’t look, I just saw its tongue, which must have been about as long as this girl, playfully lick her face. 

Then she implanted a dream within me, and if you think these fuckers are not insane, listen to what her story/dream was: In this dream I found myself walking into a cinema. The entrance-way into the cinema was dark, but when I got into the cinema the lights were on. There were people sitting in the chairs, and in front of them were a handful of blokes that were in charge. Those sitting were there to experience being killed. One of the blokes standing would walk up to someone sitting in a chair and punch them on the left side of the neck, and the person punched would suddenly die.

I sat there watching this ridiculous setup, and then my attention went to this young punk-looking female that had a purple tint in her appearance. She was standing behind me, eyeing me as one that she would like to punch. I backed up and this apprehension took me over, and then I was pulled out of the implanted dream. This female that was lying next to me now found herself in midair as she grasped with her outstretched hand, trying to grab my energy that had accumulated by me following her dream. She could not grab my energy as I was no longer in her space/world.


Remember that the implanted dreams and what I see happen during my sleep state. But even in this sleep state, what is manifesting with each passing moment, is the understanding of hold onto your energy and look within to the world that you are creating, while you drift further and further away from what is out there, as in what is outside, and not inside your space.

Move into your world that you create, and what meeting like-minded entities means, is that you are meeting others that have the same world/values as yours. That is why it is so important to create a world based on self-respect, because when you respect yourself you respect all within your space. You are nothing, and from nothing – with the strand of Inherent Godness within you – you create everything. Being humble, having respect, and more than anything wanting to be Home within the fields of Infinite Love are the foundations for your world, otherwise just stay where you are and hope for the best.

By play, we mean create, and creation is only possible through the Creator/strand within you, which is Love.


Put another way: Where you were, and who you were, you don’t want to be, because you were a slave controlled and fed from by Beasts.

So start anew. Fair enough, bring into your world what is really important to you, as you have a right to be happy, but from there allow this Love to take you and your world over so that you may go Home. We do not belong in the illusion.  


Ninety nine percent of what my wife is, is a remarkable person. Besides that, nobody else would have allowed me to ride on their backs while I had to write this journal to make sense of it all. Making money would not be a buffer one day against the insanity out there and those I love, so I gave up receiving money to receive understanding in its place. If I had any marrow in my bones I could have done both as a full-time job, but unfortunately for me I lacked any foundation to face this world on two fronts.

It is that one percent of my wife that destroys the ninety nine percent, because as I told her this morning, there is a sick puppy within her that enjoys destroying me. She is walking on thin ice, as she has the potential of losing everything that she has worked so hard for, namely a loving family, because this part of her enjoys playing cruel. I told her to wake up now, and not when it is too late, when I am no longer in her existence.  

The point to make is that in my world is Love, as in I respect all and they respect me. An expression of respect is kindness, and as has been said, this is the natural flow of what is.

The days and nights of living amongst Beasts are over. This is no longer allowed, and this is so because I am a representation of my world within – that is everywhere within the illusion.


Play wisely. Do not end up destroying yourself.


Be kind.


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I don't understand.

Why do you have no power in your dreams.... why has your mind been totally invaded?


Dreams are the measure of soul-health...... you need some security in your astral realm and fast......


Because when you die........ we risk continuing within our astral reality.

Can I ask you?


Do you ever dream of sunlight days and nice things?



I'm not trying to attack you.....but the astral reality you are depicting is not healthy and not a good place.


Did you try Zen meditation? I know you don't want advice but maybe I've seen what you have seen and can help you...

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I see you trying to invoke the 'Godness' within....but this isn't helping you...because it is a faulty paradigm.


You need to find the TRUE God. 


God lives in light. It is light. Light is a 4 dimensional continuum which brings life, energy and consciousness into this lower 3 dimensional realm.


If you can connect to Light you will know God.


It's really simple actually..... but I guess it's hard for people to believe.



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2 minutes ago, Truthspoon said:

I see you trying to invoke the 'Godness' within....but this isn't helping you...because it is a faulty paradigm.


You need to find the TRUE God. 


God lives in light. It is light. Light is a 4 dimensional continuum which brings life, energy and consciousness into this lower 3 dimensional realm.


If you can connect to Light you will know God.


It's really simple actually..... but I guess it's hard for people to believe.



My God i think i have found someone with a lot of good sense. God Bless your Heart.

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12 hours ago, Truthspoon said:

Do you ever dream of sunlight days and nice things?


Why are sunlight days and 'nice' things nice..?


Why does one need to forcefully dream something?


We have been conditioned to believe that certain things are nicer than others..


At the end of the day---They are all part of the same illusion to distract from what is really going on and the true reality.


All the new age gurus talk about is---'think of beautiful things, think of puppies, think of sunflowers, as they speak in a dreamy voice and ask you to empty your mind first and then quickly fill it with so-called 'nice' stuff.. That is just creating another delusion.


And it is dangerous because it causes split personality. ..Everyone has different approach to awakening.


Let them be...


Geldenhuys is taking his story somewhere to a conclusion where the characters  he has become familiar with will reach peace. And thus he also finds peace. He needs to finish that journey. To interrupt all human thinking to become a Zen meditator is not always the best way.


Just my opinion, not wishing to get into an argument really....But it's just that I've seen you've offered him advice a few times, and I suppose you wish to reform him (and only him on this forum for some reason) ie. to mould him to your views about this reality..





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They came last night, as they always do, to you and to me.

Now I was no longer there; I was no longer in their space.  They could not find me.


Now we can begin with a blank slate. Now the spirit and the dummy body form go into the stillness of the silence, or should we say: now Huey and Dewey listen to the Serpent soul within. The spirit and body were manufactured. The Serpent soul has been there before we were even thought of by the architects of the illusion. This is you; this is what is real within the illusion, and within you is a gem that arose from the Source of the Infinite – this strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness.


Now all the spirit and body forms do is listen and follow as the Serpent soul drives the spirit and body vehicles. Two roads are now driven: the one for the Serpent soul to find and awaken the Serpent spirit from which it was cloned, and the other is for the body and spirit vehicles to experience a slice of the cake as in what Paradise should be.


Stay within the existence/world/frequency the Serpent soul is creating.

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There is the body form, the spirit form, and the true us – the Serpent soul/kundalini force. Understanding superimposes all of them.


Yesterday afternoon I cut the grass on our lawn – it takes about four hours to cut the grass. While I was cutting the grass I thought of how it disturbed me that a part of my wife enjoyed destroying me. (This thought repeated itself for about four hours.)

When the lawn was cut I was physically and emotionally drained.

Before I went to sleep I watched the Kennedy interview regarding his new book on Fauchi. That such monsters dictate to us got me down mentally. So I lay in bed last night before I closed my eyes to sleep in a bad place physically, mentally and emotionally. I knew that if I spoke to my wife I would break her, and as I am not in the business of breaking people, I decided to keep quiet.


As I said, these physical, mental and emotional states are superimposed by understanding, as understanding is what it is.


The physical body called Steven closed his eyes and went to sleep. The spirit form of Steven was the vehicle that carried the true us; the Serpent soul, to the world it was creating, so while in this world and the presence of the spirit of Steven was doing the playing, the architect was within, namely the Serpent soul. This is its world that it is forming.


In this world Steven the spirit was learning about the densities of this world. Understand that the experiences I am going to talk about now were not a dream I  was having – it was of the spirit and Serpent soul playing/creating in our world.

I was in this classroom of sorts. Water was poured into a glass, and the glass was turned upside down. The water remained in the glass as the air beneath the water kept it there. Then I took an empty can and held my flat hand against it. When I pulled my hand away from the can the can folded in on itself as my hand took the air away from the can.

I went outside and there were people walking there. I pushed the air behind them and they lifted off the ground. Then I was at a rock-face near the sea. The colours of the rock was a blue-brown. I changed the colour to purple, and then back to what it was. From there I turned and faced the sea, and in my playing mode, parted the sea so that there were these two massive columns of water and between these columns were the rocks that the sea covered.

My friend Max was there. He looked as right as rain. When I saw him there was not the joy followed by kisses and hugs as we are accustomed to. He was there, and that was enough, as everything that was there was Love.

From parting the sea I went down some stairs, and I said to myself that I don’t want others to see me. A pang of Fear momentarily filled me, and as soon as it did, this Beast was created in my space. It crouched on all fours in front of me.


Then the body form woke up to this frequency/world.


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It was never enough for me that I be happy. What was important was that this cruelty that is seen as an everyday occurrence stop. That for me was priority number one. For this to happen, one had to go to the source of the problem, where you trace the river to where it began, and you say to yourself “Okay, what happened here that downstream is chaos?” When you understand how we got into the mess then we are on the right path to sorting it out, as now a wrong can be once again made right by understanding the big picture.


I did not spend the last eight years of my life writing this journal for nothing. I have been allowed to go where few have gone, namely within the shadows of those that control the illusion. I have seen what few have seen, and what I have seen is not a once-off – it happened just about every night for years.

This journal was written for the spirit world so that the dummies there may wake up and see how they have been played. It is also written for the cruel Beasts that enjoy parasiting and destroying others, so that they may understand what happened to them that they became so cruel.

But this journal was primarily written for the innocent so they may be free of cruelty and go Home to the fields of Infinite Love.


This setting free and passing on understanding (to those that want to understand) sounds swell, and it is, because we were all headed to disaster, as have countless others already done and continue to do so. However, there comes a time when you reading these words, and me writing them, puts up a finger in exclamation and says “BUT, now hold on a bit………….what about me?”

And I could not agree more. The Serpent soul and the other children of Semiramis and Sophia will be sorted, thanks to a combined effort of many within the illusion, BUT, what about us the body forms, as in Betty James and this Steven and others that want to experience the other side of what Life has not shown us, where the sun shines? That “Warrior” title might sound great and allow the ego to strut itself, BUT we would like to experience peace and love and joy ALL the time until we the body form depart this frequency.


What about us the body form? I doubt this journal will ever see the light of day, because it was written for me and those in the unseen, BUT I would like a return on my investment, and what that is, is to be helped by those I have helped in the unseen. My selfless seeking of the truth to solve this mess in the unseen that affects the seen has been done as I knew that I could never be happy until those that are as unhappy as me are also happy. What the unseen showers on me, showers on all the seekers of peace and happiness in the seen realms, and this sounds swell, but what can be done to make it happen?  The Serpent soul is creating its world, and what this world is I can only assume is a bridge to the Serpent spirit, and another bridge to us the body form. The world the Serpent soul is creating is its portal to the Serpent spirit in slumber. By experiencing all, it may understand all so that this understanding may be passed on to the Serpent spirit which will awaken it.

I remember in high school reading a poem that the poet wrote about himself. This man had an esteemed life, and then fell, and if I remember correctly, the fall paralysed him. The poem goes about him having to go back in his life where he is once again a baby, where he has to learn to walk and fend for himself again, of course with the fear of falling again, where he would have to start all over.


This I believe is what is happening to the Serpent soul – it has to once again know itself; it has to know what creation is by it creating, and by creating it may understand that there is nothing really to create as what we are is everything, as we arose from the Source of the Infinite which is everything. This poor, poor fucker the Serpent soul has been locked up since time immemorial because of our ignorance, and now needs to once again know itself by expressing itself.


One of my friends who I remember, but have never met in my sleep state, is the funky polar bear Earl. (In our limited vision this essence/frequency of Earl looks like a polar bear.) A few weeks back in my sleep state I saw Earl in his cave as he looked out into the worlds. He could not leave his cage/cave because he was trapped therein, and this enslavement was through the ignorance of those in the illusion. Where was he safe? The cruel would destroy him and the ignorant would destroy him. None are so blind as those that refuse to see.

That is why this journal has taken so long to complete, because if we want to set others free, we have to set ourselves free first, and by “we” I imply the Serpent souls. In order to set these souls free the body and spirit forms needed to know what they are. We are not as important as we think we are. We were manufactured, whereas the Serpent soul was born within the illusion from the Serpent spirit. The one was born with Love, the other was ultimately made to feed Beasts and be played in a cruel Game. Can you imagine the isolation; the loneliness of being where you don’t belong and there is nowhere to go as all within the illusion are friggin’ insane. Tyranny ruled, not Love, with the Watcher spirit at the helm that our fear created.


The Serpent soul will be okay, as in it will once again know itself, and by knowing itself it will know of its Home, the Serpent spirit from which it was cloned. This I know to be the truth. It will happen, if it has already not happened.

The vehicle for this Serpent soul has been our spirit. (Take a piece of wire, and then shoot an electrical current through it. The wire is us the body form, and the spirit can be equated as the less dense static electricity that comes off the wire. The electrical current that got everything sparked up is the strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness within. By forgetting this strand, and what it stands for, namely kindness, we forget ourselves and start sliding to the Nothingness of the Forgotten. When you get there you understand that the caviar or the cognac or the villa meant nothing unless it was backed up by a good heart – an expression of the strand.)


The disaster is that we all forgot about the strand, so nobody could help anyone else, and this was so because they never understood what suppressed the strand, namely the greed and selfishness that the Parasitic frequency of Deception created, as well as the control and cruelty of the Watcher spirit.


As said, the Serpent soul will be okay. Our spirit has seen this world that the one within – the Serpent soul – has created. It is fair to thus say that our spirit will be okay. It can go with the Serpent soul and catch a ride via the Serpent spirit to the fields of Infinite Love.

This leaves us the body form, and it is here that we have to answer all those BUTS. That I will live the rest of my days serving others is okay – I don’t expect to sip cocktails on my island in the Bahamas for the rest of my life. What I do expect is to live a full, joyous life with someone watching my back, and that someone is one who has the illusion down on pat where everything is sorted. That someone is the Serpent soul, and this looking after us it will gladly do, as long as we stand back and allow this one who knows best to lead the way. (As has been said, we the body forms are not as important as we think we are, so allow the Serpent soul who knows best to lead the way.)


How is this done? How do we replace our BUTS with “thank you’s.” How are our backs covered; how are we always looked after by one who knows more than us; how do we receive joy and happiness, just as we would wish it upon others?

What the Serpent soul does, is that it creates a portal/connection between the spirit form and us. This allows the spirit to act as a transformer between us the body form and the Serpent soul and the realm where it is. In other words, what the Serpent soul knows we the body form now knows, but we take in what we can handle, otherwise we take in too much which puts us in a flat spin. I met this girl once whose aunt could move the curtains  so that they are parallel to the floor by merely looking at them. She never fully understood her power so she ended up in a loony bin.

I can spend my time thinking I was wronged so badly by my wife, but if I was a clever man, I would listen to what the Serpent soul has to tell me via my spirit. Now my frequency band has broadened, where I take in the world of the Serpent soul so that its wondrous world may superimpose the one I am in. Now me, the body form can play, as the worlds of old – the ones of the Watcher and the parasite – are no more. Just as I saw my friend Max in this world of the Serpent soul, so too will other friends come to visit to touch us through the portal via the spirit that is around us. (This spirit will not leave us until we are happy and on our feet, just as the Serpent soul will not abandon us.) We just need to start doing our bit: hold onto your energy and live within, not without. Within is the world that the Serpent soul created, and by tapping into this world you bring what is within without. Now there are no BUTS. Now there are humble “thank you’s.”


May these understandings set us all on the path back Home.

Whenever you can, make time for the stillness of the silence and go within to tap into the Serpent soul via the spirit. Now we live in the heart energy space, and from this space the world of the Serpent soul is expressed and formed into the frequency that is all "around us" the body form. Always go within to this world, never without, and what was within will be expressed without. Now, with every moment, the frequency that was without is transformed to what the Serpent soul has understood in once again finding/knowing itself.

Then there will be a moment where the body form severs itself from the frequency that was placed before it by those from the shadows. For me, this severing; this burning ties of the old will be seen as a blackening of the skin under the nail of the right big toe. The understandings from the Serpent soul have transformed the old to the new. Now you the body form are in this world of the Serpent soul as you visit the world of old that you knew. Many will call you God, but what you are is merely natural – you are just allowing the strand within to shine.


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