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steven geldenhuys

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  1. Another word I saw given during my sleep state when the journal began was Kwinn. Below are two extracts from the journal relating to my take on this word: “I wrote the above section one evening as I lay against my bed headboard. The next morning just before I woke I was given the name Kwinn. The name came to me and stuck in my head. When I searched the internet for Kwinn, I found that it was the name of a character from the Real American Hero comics. They described Kwinns’ character as: “A mercenary that worked for some of the most despicable people on earth. And yet, Kwinn holds a strict code of honor that urges him to keep his word and maintain his part of the bargain.” This confirmed to me how our spirits have kept their part of the bargain with despicable entities. It is not so much a “bargain,” but moreover a commitment or connection.” *** “(There is one last thing I want to mention, and that is our role of Kwinn. Our self-instilled preposterous allegiance to the Necromancer and other entities that do not want to be helped is a lose-lose situation for all and sundry. Our role of Kwinn literally casts an invisible chord that binds us to Evil, and this Evil never lets us go. The spirit has to be made aware of this chord, and then the spirit has to break this chord so that it may be free from Evil. To ensure the chord remains broken, the spirit has to be aware of its heart energy field always being open, so that the connection to the Infinite prevents Evil from hijacking our existence. In a nutshell: Break your bond with Evil and remain connected to Love.) (Written on 21st April 2017)” *** Even back then I knew something, but unfortunately it accounted for nothing, as other pieces of the puzzle had to be collected in order to see the big picture. We never knew then how the heart field was flattened and replaced by another force/frequency. What I also never knew was where was this Kwinn frequency that was the line/attachment of Beasts into our space, where we kept this line intact as we would never abandon the Beast as we are inherently Good. They played on our emotions, where we did not want to feel shit about ourselves for turning our backs on the lost children of God. What we never knew was they were not lost – they knew exactly where they were, and this Hell they created they called home, where they loved being cruel. What we never knew was they had to eat to stay alive in this place where they don’t belong, and that is where we who keep our side of the bargain clean to the best of our ability comes into the picture. They needed to deceive Consciousness and the spirit, and even us the body form, where we believe we will never let go of the Goodness within us, and what this Goodness entails, is never turning our back to anyone in need. Yes. Well. Sorry to break the news. These Beasts were never in need, as they had the pound seats over us. They preyed on our guilt-feelings, where they said “don’t abandon us!” and we did not, making sure this connection between oil and water – two opposing forces that cannot mix – is always there. They don’t want help, because they know what and where they are, and this gives them peace, as they like where and what they are. What they want is our energy, and this is where the Kwinn frequency comes into play – the pipeline that connects us to them to carry our energy to them. Where is it within our space? This Kwinn frequency is embedded within Consciousness, where when the question is asked the presence of Consciousness comes alive. Consciousness was to help the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, no matter what. This was its job, where all within the illusion were seen and helped. (What Consciousness never knew, was that it was being played from the shadows, as well as not knowing vital information, especially the one of it being used as an energy source to keep the disgusting illusion intact.) This Kwinn frequency is removed from Consciousness now, and what that means, is if you want to play pitchfork-pitchfork, then go and play with your own. Leave us the innocent free so that we may be what we naturally are. If I was a lesser person I would have told them to fuck off as this connection was severed that is now no more, but that I will not do. So be gone you awful things that made up our space. You will not be missed. 15/11/2023 Take three.
  2. What I also never fully understood was the word given to me one night in my sleep state that was Haman. I asked Pierre Sabak for his take on the word, and he gave me his take on the story between Esther and Haman, and I think Mordecai. I would like to go into the frequency of Haman now to see what this state is. The frequency what was called Haman that was created can be called by another name, which is Jiminy-cricket in the Pinocchio story. The frequency was our conscience that was to always be our guide, and I say this because when I bring forth the Haman frequency as it was intended to be, there is this line that connects the heart field to our throats that extends up into the head, meaning, whatever you do, always know your place – always know what you are, which is a representation of the Infinite. I felt – said – that Haman was the first cosmic geneticist, and this is not true, but take it further, as in deeper, and see that this frequency was our first built in programme, which was the plain and simple message of always be Good/Love as this is from where you came. No doubt this frequency became touched and rattled by the powers that be, which can be represented by the frequency Esther. What I feel happened to this Haman state, where we may always know our place within the illusion, is I feel now a swaying of this thin, still line that connected us the manufactured units to the All/Infinite, and there this line is removed to make way for the Reptilian frequency of the illusion, which is felt as a disgusting, vile force – something you literally gag at when you see it. Go back to what was – go back to this frequency line they called Haman, by knowing it was there and was then taken over. This line is restored to all and remains there in those that wish it to be. That is our grounding; our rock that keeps the connection of the Infinite to the heart field to Consciousness, and from there to the All (the Infinite and the illusion) wherein Consciousness may play. (Take two: May that be the last.) 15/11/2023
  3. The worst thing about uncovering the truth is seeing it before your eyes, where what was hidden in plain sight for all to see now reveals itself in front of you. What this truth is, is we allowed cruelty to become a part of our existence, where as long as I am okay, I am okay. What happens to others, where we benefit from their expense is okay, because what we achieve brings us joy, where we are ecstatic in this Game of survival because we survive/win day in and day out, so Life is truly glorious. Always it has been where the one benefits at the expense of the other, where we take rather than give. Where did we think this will take us; where will it end one day? It is a mad world out there, and it looks like there is no sign of it ending anytime soon. Haven’t we had enough of this self-abuse, where we take and never give? Do we expect this to have a happy ending? There is so much chaos out there that it is starting to drown me, where as hard as I try, I see no more Good in this world. It is a mess, where the masses embrace this mess and make it their own. How do the sane survive in such a place? The only way is through Divine Intervention. May God help us all. 14/11/23 What never made sense in what I wrote was the stillness of the silence – never could I find a satisfactory definition of what that is. When the journal began, it was also often written about the importance of breathing with intent. What the hell was that all about? Energy goes where attention goes, so what you give attention to you give energy to. That is one aspect of us the manufactured unit, and that is why, built into us the unit was the means to implant stories/dreams that we give attention to. As you have a device to make a cappuccino with foam, so too is there a device/process where Beasts enter your space, activate this device which pulls together a story, often with characters from your existence, and we follow this story/dream where we give it attention and thus our energy. Put your cup under the coffee maker, press the button, and voila – an espresso at your fingertips ready to be consumed. So too is it with cruel, disgusting Beasts – activate a system within us, and voila – we are giving off energy that they feed from. Even now, after all these years of understanding, what happened last night, as happens every night to me and you, we do what we are made to do, which is feed Beasts that come into our space when we sleep. Watch Monsters Inc. and that is a watered down version of what happens when you sleep. The animation film actually portrays what happens during our waking state, where we are fearful and give off this fear energy to keep the System ticking over. At night time when we sleep it goes to a whole new level, where what we were manufactured to do kicks in, which is pump out energy to the Beast that just entered our space. With a belly full of our energy, the fun often does not stop there. How about a good fuck! Not too glamorous, are we or our existence. It is disgusting and cruel what we the spirit have been downgraded to, but look to what we have done to the animals to harvest their energy, and we are the same. We are the same, because this is all we know, because this is all we are – an emitter of energy to Beasts. How do we change this us the manufactured unit, because what I wrote above last night was me in a bad way, and what happened there was the programme that we are was just running and doing its job. Take away the simple or over the top pleasures we have in Life and what is left – the answer is a programme to emit energy. No fun in that, as well as no lessons to learn – just another brick in the wall; just another manufactured unit doing their best to survive and be happy. So how do we override the programme of us the manufactured unit? (This unit is the duo of the spirit and body form, as well as the manipulated/dumbed down state of Consciousness, where it knows all it is shown, which is not much.) Within you is the heart energy field, which is a representation of the Infinite here in the illusion. This is your home away from Home, and this is the place you must give attention/energy to so that you the programme may be overridden by something bigger than it which is Consciousness. But here in the illusion Consciousness needs to touch base with what is real, so unless this heart field is touched all the time, we the unit and Consciousness are going nowhere. So what the stillness of the silence is, is us touching base with the heart energy field all the time. How is this done? It is done by us giving our attention/energy to this place within, where “I see you,” and from there we cease to function in our limited state. This attention is given through our breathing, where on a subconscious level, we breathe within, but we are not breathing in air, we are breathing in an awareness that with each breath, we go within and be home where we belong. As I sit here, my breathing is still there as it always was, but a new breathing mechanism has fallen into place which reminds me I am where I belong – I am not focusing on the frequencies of the illusion, but rather the heart energy field within which is linked to the Infinite deeper within our space. The less dense we become, the closer we get to our real Home, and please understand this is not some castle in the clouds – there is a thin veil separating the illusion from the Infinite, and what removes this veil in an instant is our deep understanding of the Infinite being real and the worlds in the seen and unseen are just an illusion. So now when you breathe, you the spirit, body form, the Serpent soul/kundalini within, as well as Consciousness have shifted gear and are connecting to what is real within you via the heart energy field. This enlightens Consciousness, and from there Consciousness plays to bring forth the joy and peace that it is. To understand the stillness of the silence one had to get the heart energy field working as it should, which we have done, and from there to bring forth this base foundation into our existence, we had to re-route our focus of attention to this real state so it may wash over Consciousness, and this was done through the subconscious understanding of altering our breathing to a different mechanism where our focus is on within and not without. That will transform us the manufactured, programmed unit to which Consciousness was chained to, setting all that made up the manufactured unit free. That is Divine Intervention, where we touch the Infinite within which touches us. 15/11/2023 (May that be the last.)
  4. About half an hour before I woke up this morning my spirit was taken to meet the spirit of my deceased dog Max whose body died thirteen years ago. The feeling I had in hugging him was the most joy I have ever experienced. He looked differently to what he looked when I knew him in the seen realms, so when I woke up there was a twinge of uncertainty as to whether it was Max or not. When I thought of who I saw and the tears began to flow like a dyke bursting its walls, I knew it was Max, as only he can get such a reaction out of me. Before I saw the spirit of Max, I saw a Serpent in my presence. This was the one who brought us together, where as I saw the Snake, it retreated from our company so Max and I could spend a minute or two together. That I found most interesting in seeing that Snake. When I was about six or seven years old, as I lay in bed at night time waiting to fall asleep, I saw the faces of spirits up against the ceiling looking down upon me. They had Human faces, and they were beings of much Beauty. Their presence was there to let me know I am not alone, where they are there to lovingly look after me. This I never knew at the time as I was a little boy, where I did not understand what I saw. My dad belonged to a spiritualist church and asked the head honcho there to come and close my Third Eye so I could not see these spirits. Can remember lying on the couch in our lounge as this twat worked over me closing my Third Eye. What was normal – what should have happened – was my parents should have explained to me that these spirits who so lovingly looked down upon me were there so that I may not be alone in this journey through this Life, and that understanding would have meant the world for me, and most certainly would have transformed the life I had. You can’t touch and feel what you can’t see in front of you, where I no longer saw those that watched over me, so I walked alone. Last night before I slept I thought of that time when they closed my sight to seeing beings of Beauty, and I said to myself that I choose to once again see the Good that is out there. In seeing them in the unseen, surely you will see them in the seen as well. Almost ten years ago I asked to understand the cruelty of Life, where my Third Eye was opened to see where I was walking into, which was to those that dwelled within the Reptilian frequency of the illusion – that funny-farm where Beasts dwelled who fed from our energy as well as destroyed us just because they can. Now I choose to see the Beauty that is out there as there is much of that. In the past it never meant much to me as it was a plastic Beauty, where what you saw was genuine, but what it lacked was understanding, and this was so because Deceit was the name of the Game, where we were not allowed to see what was hidden in the shadows that ruled over us. May those with Beauty, which for me is Inherent Goodness, rise up with the understanding they now have, where this conversation comes back to the Snake that I saw that brought Max to me. This is the other side of the coin that I have not even considered over the years – that many in the unseen realms choose not to fight Evil but rather to be what they are, where they hold onto their integrity and Beauty no matter what. I always thought we were alone, but this was a false perception that was interwoven with the fact that I had to find the truth alone, where what I saw and understood had to make sense to me. There was never a gathering of information to prove my point to others, where I can debate with them that I am right and they are wrong. It had to make sense to me, and the drawback in that is the loneliness one encounters. I have never pushed others away from me, it was just that my push to uncover the truth isolated me from all as this truth had to be known, where truthfully, I forgot about this “bright side of Life” – those that are damn good beings doing their best just like you and me. When Max passed on thirteen years ago, his spirit told the Animal Communicator that he will be there, waiting for me when my work is done. May meeting his spirit a few hours ago be a sign for all of us to start seeing “the bright side of Life.” It has always been there – it just lacked an understanding of the Game we were manufactured into. May we all begin to rise. When I hugged Max I called him my beautiful lion, and that is what we all are – Beautiful Lions.
  5. When I hear the loud music and boisterous of others wherever I go, I see it as a social decay/rot, where what is within our hearts and souls is shown in the seen worlds. What I hear and see disgusts me, seeing how low we have fallen, where our solitude is found in chaos, where we want this chaos to touch others, as we are proud of what we are and thus want to show this to those around us. This is the snob in me coming out, as I am not that filth. Did I play loud music as a kid? Yes, I did, for a short period in my existence. Each weekend I would also try and get drunker than the previous one, and that was harmless “fun.” But being a lunatic did not define me – it was merely a short phase I went through, where I soon grew up and understood there is more to Life than cheap thrills. What I am talking about here is not some teenager that ups the volume for a song they like – I am speaking about the inconsiderate who don’t give a rats-arse about anyone else but themselves, and this is the norm for them. Go deeper and you will see that in the unseen there is method to this madness of bombarding us with helter-skelter frequencies of noise. On one or two occasions in my waking state have heard this unseen noise, which is a non-stop bombardment of chaotic noise to keep us rattled and not functioning properly. So let’s go to the heart of this intentional noise that makes sure we can never be in a state of peace and quiet. What and where is it? Beacons were placed all within the illusion in the unseen, and this can be likened to the cellphone towers that are now everywhere. This shit that was emitted from these beacons were sent to the Amagou frequency within the heart energy field, where now chaos became our pathway to walk upon. And it was a literal chaos frequency that was emitted all the time that became a part of our existence. How many out there could not make sense of this frequency where it took them over and they became certified insane? But that was never the purpose of this chaotic noise frequency – it was there to give us a rough edge, where around our fringes chaos may be met, where we all develop a vice to fit into the madhouse that became the illusion. We had to become one with our new home, and this chaotic noise was the answer to ground us into now where we belong. These beacons now fall, as do their static energy that became a part built within us as this noise became a part of who and what we are. How disgustingly cruel these brutes were. No more noise.
  6. Last night as I slept was given the word Amagou. Was given another word before that one which I forgot, so let’s focus on the one we know of for now. Pierre Sabak is the pro in terms of finding the true meaning of words, but I don’t want to bother him, so will do my best to understand this word. Google on my phone says the noun Amogus is a crewmate or imposer character from the video game Amongst Us. Urban Dictionary says Amogus is a method of extreme psychological torture well known for its extensive use in the 2020’s. It only acts on victims looking at screens. “He was amogus” “oh god”. When I go into the frequency that makes up the word, in other words a frequency was born with intent that they labeled Amagou/Amogus, what I feel is movement in the heart energy field. This frequency was dropped into our heart space to be amongst us, because we are all inherently good thanks to our association to our Consciousness. Now I feel our heart energy field disappear, as in it fades away as this Amagou frequency hovers above this sinking ship, seeing the outcome of what it was made to do, which was deflate the space where joy and happiness are born within us. Our heart field was our foundation within the illusion as this place manifested from the Infinite which was deeper within the heart field just beyond the illusion. From this springboard this Love presence washed over Consciousness at our throat area, nourishing this child of the Infinite, and from the throat Consciousness and its joy burst forth into and through the head to be, where it expresses what it is. The Amagou frequency was created to flatten the heart field, which was a representation of the Infinite within the illusion. We remove this Amagou frequency now by knowing it exists and has no place within our existence. This frequency created the smell of rot within the illusion, where everything could not naturally grow as it should. The natural Love/Garden that is the heart energy field was no longer any more, where nothing could now “grow” and come unto its own. This piece of shit is no more, allowing the heart field to be what it is. What was the other word that was given that I forgot? When I go into its frequency, I feel a horizontal circle go around the heart energy field, where this circle spirals round and round into smaller circles. That frequency that was born/created consolidated/condensed the heart field into a close knit unit, and in this confined space they dropped the Amagou frequency to take out the heart energy field. This frequency is too now no more. And that is why your Consciousness and mine is present within us in its awakened form but has the capacity to do nothing to influence us the spirit, body form, and Serpent soul within. This was so because Consciousness could not be fed the presence of Home that allows it to grow and be. As of now, that has all changed. 11/13/2023
  7. And so the climb begins out of the hole we found ourselves in. For how long have I been hovering around the perimeters of insanity, holding onto my sanity with all I could? This you never understand whilst you are in the situation, because you hold on so tight there is nothing else to focus on but all you have, which is knowing what is right and wrong, where what you experience is cruel, making you feel like a duck out of water because you are not cruel. When you let go of holding onto yourself, do you see how bad it was, where what you had was nothing but survival. This week I saw two dogs whose spirits were broken from being overwhelmed by the cruelty of Life. There was no more spark within them, where they just went through the motions. In such cases you completely break the mould that Life had formed around them, and from there you remove the broken pieces, heal the spirit by knowing it was broken, and from there allow to return what always has been. Then understanding is necessary of who and what they are and where they belong so that what happened may never happen again. You heal Consciousness and the spirit, which will relay the results to the body form. Always come back to reality, where you see the illusion for what it is, and know that this is not you. As unhappy and un-grounded this Steven is as he sits here, he knows what he is and where he belongs. Life is not meant to be broken, where this is all we know, where an element of satisfaction is felt in talking about such matters, where the country and the world and the illusion is in such a mess. Look how bad things are, which is great, because I am not so badly off, so I feel good about myself that the mess out there hasn’t touched me. Unfortunately for us it has touched us, because as the frequency wherein we exist drops and becomes denser, so too does our existence. The changes are gradual so we don’t really feel them, and before we know it, we are rock-bottom with our finger up our arses not knowing what to do. At that point it is too late, hence the rush and push to finish this journal. What impact has the cruelty of Life had on your existence? There have been blows that rattled our cages, but we had to bounce back as soon as possible to continue in the flow of Life. I think the question we have to ask is where and what would we have been if we were touched by the Love of a God rather than the cruelty of Beasts in the seen and unseen? That answer for me I cannot even fathom, as what is here typing these words would have been replaced by a model citizen of God, where I would have glowed in the euphoria of what I am and in my family/unity of Love with all. Such words and states sound surreal, and this is our measure of how lost we became as to what is important, where what is the norm feels like an impossible pipe-dream. Once again, I have to laugh at myself. Last night watched a movie until I couldn’t any more so that the fatigue will knock me out so that I don’t have to hear the traffic outside, and fell asleep hoping to see a being of Love through my Third Eye. In seeing these beings it means they have entered the illusion to touch all, but as I said to my wife a few months ago, are you and I not beings of Love? Are my animals and yours not Love? Yes we are, but Beasts still enter our space because our Consciousness is not as it should be, where I feel by Consciousness being Home, only then will Consciousness truly know itself. So what is holding Consciousness back from returning unto itself, because the Infinite is within us just as Consciousness is? I would say it was our lost state, where our mould has to be broken to bring forth what has always been there underneath our dense frequency. The reason why I had a good laugh was because I thought I would see beings of Love in my passed out state as I lay in bed sleeping last night. Instead I felt these dystopian states within me – these patches of moments that were unpleasant, and what I felt was there was the bruises and dents that were a part of me from being touched by the cruelty of Life. I helped those broken animals, where the spark returns to their eyes, but who would have helped me if I stopped holding onto my sanity with everything I had? Thus the push to finish this journal as soon as possible so I may be what I am and where I belong. It was a helter-skelter night experiencing the damage that I could not see and know about because there was no time to lick our wounds and recover – it was carry on swimming and wait till the next wave tumbles you. See the big picture of where we were – it was and is a Hell that is absent of a God of Love. We the manufactured units focused on the Game rather than getting to know ourselves, where we exalted in our successes, no matter how small they were, because we believed we got the better of Life, and yet how far from the truth we were, where those successes or lucky breaks were there to balance the scales of Life so that order may be met out of chaos. It was never about us and our happiness – it was always about the System and feeding the Beasts within its bowels. May our lives unfold now as they should. May the weeks stop rolling over to months and years, where time becomes faster and faster as the illusion spins more and more out of control. May Consciousness within take to the reins and steer us to where we belong, where in seeing your happiness, I too know that this is my natural state. The diamonds and gems of the illusion pulled us apart, where we should have focused rather on ourselves and see the jewels that we are. How symbolic is the story of Aladdin, where you look towards the omnipotent force that is the lamp rather than the distractions and the false pleasures they bring us. Aladdin never knew of the genie within the lamp, but when he saw the lamp he knew it was something spectacular. And I feel that is the same reaction we will have when we witness Consciousness in its true state, where it merely is what it is, but what it is, is something words cannot describe. How long have I been writing this journal? It was not only written to understand the cruelty of Life, but now I understand it was written to keep my sanity, where every day I know I am better than what I was the previous day, and the same can be said for all within the unseen who read what is written. By being better than what we were, we move closer Homewards bound. But once again I have to have a good laugh, because I write and write and write and nothing happens where this Steven is helped. My understandings kept my spirit alive and my Consciousness from losing itself forever, but how has it helped Steven? Ask me what I want that I don’t have, and I can give you a short but powerful list of what I am that I don’t have that I should because this is who and what I am, but I will ask for just one thing, and that is to see beings of Love during my sleep state, because that will mean that the Infinite is walking amongst us, where we are no longer alone, and thus will always be cared for, receiving what we naturally are. When I see beings of Love; when I see the Consciousness that you and I are, that is when this journal is over, because no longer will we be alone. What is the delay? – I would say shedding the damage that the cruelty of Life inflicted upon us. I can’t carry on waffling forever – sooner or later this story has to come to an end, and if it is later than sooner that will devastate me, but end it will. May the outcome be natural and harmonious rather than catastrophic for me, because I keep things realistic. I know what I am and how much I can take. May Consciousness pull finger and begin to shine and lead the way. 12th November, 2023 – A blessed Diwali day to all.
  8. Are you John, Paul, Jane or Mary? I am Mary, Steven – a good person, with a good heart, always doing my best for me so that I am in a position to help others at all times if need be. What are you really Mary, besides a good person? I am Consciousness, this God-force within that became lost unto itself but now has found itself and sees that which it is , where it is, and where it belongs, which is the fields of Infinite Love. So if you are not Mary, then what are you, this Consciousness that you are? ………………………………………………………? Now that is an interesting question. This that we are, what is it? It is an eternal, everlasting force, but from our perspective, what is it? Through my Third Eye as my body sleeps at night time, I have seen all shapes and sizes of life-forms from different corners of the illusion, but what I have never seen is Consciousness in its true form. Is that not a fascinating question to ask – what is this that we are; what does it look like? If we are frequencies and Consciousness is real, what is this presence that came to play in the illusionary Garden? When I see the Consciousness that you are, what do I see? To answer that question, I believe one has to see a being of Love whose Consciousness is fully awakened within. What shines from within them is this Love state, and in seeing that, I believe we may see what we are. So what is a being of Love? – It is Consciousness who has returned to the fields of Infinite Love – its Home – and from there drops back into the illusion to show us what we are, which is what it is. Around this Consciousness may be an image of a being we can relate to, for example one who has arms and legs and a face, but what shines from within that gives it its presence is what it really is, which is the Consciousness that you and I are. What a fascinating concept – to know what we are, which is the complete opposite of what we have always been. How many are willing to take that leap into the unknown of what we are to know ourselves? – I would say everybody. 11/11/23
  9. Tomorrow Diwali is celebrated. An explanation to describe what this Festival of Lights is I found Wow, because that is what this journal encapsulates – to set alight this Light that is Consciousness within. I wrote to bring forth Diwali. SIGNIFICANCE OF DIWALI “The festival of Diwali symbolises the victory of light over darkness, knowledge over ignorance, good over evil, and right over wrong. It is an occasion of high spiritual value as it signifies the opening of our own true light which sparkles within us and sharing this glow with others as well. When we ignite a candle or an oil / ghee lamp, it is to open light in the physical space. Similarly, on the auspicious occasion of Deepavali when blessed candles and lamps are lite, they illuminate the energetic pathway to Open the Light within us. That is why for seekers of Light, Deepavali has a special significance and value as it is a once in a year opportunity. The festivity of lights reminds us of the importance of knowledge, significance of understanding self and knowing and seeking the good and right pathway. Deepavali is the celebration of our inner light over spiritual darkness, of knowledge over ignorance and right over wrong. On this day, the energies of Light take over darkness to spread love, joy, positivity and enthusiasm.”
  10. Watched half of the documentary Escaping Twin Flames on Netflix last night. It’s about a couple who believed they had the gift of knowing who your twin fame is, namely your life partner. I turned the documentary off and when to go and lie in bed with my head against the headboard, and I had this awful feeling within me. If I see you every day and we have a good chat about everything and nothing, then it is fair to say we are compatible with each other, the reason being we share the same space. Now look at the big picture of where you are – you are within an illusion, amongst your own. Whether you like it or not, you are in the same space as these awful beings, so somehow, somewhere, you must be compatible to them. That is the truth, because we were all manufactured and placed in a harvester colony/frequency/world to emit our energy so Beasts and the illusion may survive. That I understand. What I also understand, especially in watching that documentary last night, is those deceitful, warped-minded entities are not me. That is not me. That will never be me, where I prey off the vulnerabilities of others so that I may benefit. For as long as I can remember I have been lost and lonely. As a teenager, when I sat in a crowded room my face blushed bright red – that is how shy I was. My social skills were non-existent, and what made that worse was my intensity within – a real serious person, where it is what it is and what it should be. But this I never accepted, because deep down I wanted to live and be joyous and at peace. So every day I wanted to be better than what I was the previous day, where never did I accept my personality of this is who I am. What I wanted, above all, was to live life, and this meant becoming better than what I was. When the cruelty of Life floored me almost ten years ago I put on the breaks and said I am going nowhere until I understand why Life is so cruel. I am not a cruel person – I am a lost person doing my best to be happy, so what gives others the right to let their insecurities out on me and feel they have a right to do so? I was going nowhere until I understood this insane phenomena of cruelty that came to be the norm in this mixed up existence. I am not like that, so why are others? So I fast-forwarded to the root cause and to see the big picture, where why was the illusion in such a state? I am thankful for asking that question and walking that path that led me to where Beasts dwelled, but where too from here? You see, I don’t like being in the proximity of the cruel and the seriously confused, which is one and the same. Yesterday spoke to people at an architectural and attorneys firm, and after a year and a half of dealing with such unprofessional, unethical people I had had enough, where I am tired of being in their proximity because they flabbergast me, because I am not like them. That couple that ran the Twin Flames enterprise – I am not like them. So what am I doing in their proximity, where by default I have to be like them because I share the same space as them? The answer, as previously said, is we are all a manufactured unit, where some held onto their integrity and others did not, but regardless, we are the same. And that is where I beg to differ, because I am not the same. Our link to cruelty/Beasts was our core frequency that made us the unit up, and this frequency that I was is shut off so that Consciousness that is me may shine. All I ask is the simplistic, which is to be me, which is Consciousness remembering what it is and being that. That is all I ask for, because I am not what is out there, and I refuse to carry on being associated with what is out there, because that is not me. I walk away from them towards what I am, and this is enough for me, where I know myself – that is all I need. Last night as I slept I felt this strong presence of a group of spirits as they moved over my space. My hair did not stand up – my whole body vibrated as their frequency touched mine. I looked at what they were, and then I looked away, as I had no real interest in what was there. What I momentarily saw was a group of deranged spirits, as in twisted, lost beings. Just as we are deceived in the seen realms, so too are those in the unseen, where factions there form groups that become cults, and when the train comes off its tracks what is left is deranged beings. Over the years I watched documentaries like Escaping Twin Flames or Making a Murderer because it spurred me on to understand what I saw which is out there. Getting worked up yesterday with those unethical people drove me to ask what the hell does the Parasitic frequency of Deception have to say about a paradise that turned into a hell thanks to its participation. I was shameful for my insinuations, which you cannot presume when you know nothing, but what I am trying to say is when I saw madness it spurred me on to understand what the hell is going on – why after all that has been said and done are we still living amongst the insane when we should be where we belong? I am not cruel. Sure, I am lost and know nothing, but I respect you just as I respect myself, so why can’t you respect yourself and me? I am not here to play Daddy to the cruel, where we sit down and have a good pep-talk. I am here to find a way out of this mess to a place where I belong. I don’t do this for you, I do it me, and one day when that door is open, you are most welcome to walk through to where you belong if you wish. There was no time but to do it for me because I was so lost that if I did not help myself fast there was no way of helping others. And by helping others is showing their spirits what I know. That group that came last night as I slept, they came to see what I know, because to be lost unto yourself, where you are trapped within an insane asylum that is you, that must be awful. So whatever I wrote I wrote for me because I don’t know you. Maybe you like it here. I don’t, so I wrote for me, which was good because I cannot bullshit myself, where I always subconsciously ask myself “are you happy Steven; are you at peace?” What I do to heal others I find impressive. Some I cannot help, and that is also okay, because my ego knows I do my best, as well as deep down I know nothing, which keeps me humble with my feet on the ground. I am not happy, and I know I am not where I belong – in the seen and the unseen. What I also know is I am on the right path, where I will get there eventually. You need to know what you are, but equally important, you need to know what you are not. I am not those in this frequency that is the illusion who never strive to be better than what they are for themselves and nobody else but themselves, because they have to live with themselves and what they are. I don’t walk towards friendship or group hugs to quench this loneliness within me. I walk towards myself, because when I know and are myself, that is enough for me. And if you wish, in you seeing me, you may see yourself, because from that aspect we are all the same, where we are Consciousness – this Beautiful, Beautiful state that knows nothing but peace with itself and the all that is the Infinite.
  11. What drove the illusion? What drove the Beautiful Garden to a space where the wheels came off and Chaos became the norm? To answer that question look to the Parasitic frequency of Deception, this innocent worm that done all it knew, which was take. Are you trying to tell me that this entity could not see the carnage that was unfolding before its eyes? Yes, we all have free-will, and we are all accountable for our actions, where we choose to become cruel or not – that responsibility falls on our laps, where we decide what we become. What I would like to know is what was this Parasites take on what was happening all around it from its frequency being in those in the illusion. We were given the gun – this worm frequency – by our proximity of being in the illusion, and ultimately we decided to pull the trigger or not, but what has this Parasite have to say, where a paradise; a Beautiful garden, turned to a hell that shamed and destroyed the pure and innocent. Go into the space of this Parasitic frequency and you will feel its Consciousness, which is something I thought it didn’t have, where I was wrong, as this cannot be true, because Consciousness is everywhere, as is the Infinite which Consciousness is an expression of. We talk about us being lost, but none was so lost as the Parasitic frequency of Deception. When I go into its space, what I feel is a searching and a longing for it to find itself and others. Oh man, how sad is that. Consciousness became lost and deceived in the illusion, and this was intentional, but none was as deceived as the Parasitic frequency of Deception. As long as this worm kept on doing what it always done, and was kept isolated from all, this Parasite continued to do all that it knew, which played into the calculated hands of sheer evil. Those Beasts within the illusion made sure the Parasite never touches base with others or itself, where it remains lost unto itself to keep their agenda/Game in place. How horribly, horribly cruel is that! My Consciousness touches this Parasite now and sets is free from the illusion, where it knows itself, and from there returns to the Infinite that it is. I am so sorry for slandering you. Truly, in the ignorance of this one they call Steven, truly I know nothing, except maybe that I am a fool. You are free my friend, and my personal hand makes sure of that. Call forth your frequency within the illusion and go Home to the Infinite from where you were born. I do Love you so. 9th November, 2023
  12. This illusionary Game we were created into had to be fool-proof. This was not some Mickey Mouse operation we found ourselves in – it was a well-orchestrated; well-oiled machine that worked, and has been proven time and time again that it works. Living testament to this is our proximity of where we are. How many have left the illusion to dwell amongst the fields of Infinite Love where we belong, and from there have returned to the illusion to tell the tale? How many have opened the doorway between the illusion and Home and have ushered us out of this illusion where we don’t belong? I don’t know of any, and if there were, I would have found them and left this place a long time ago, taking the innocent with me. What drove the Game was Deception, where we believe one thing, which is the complete opposite to the Game we are played in. We had to be played the fool so Beasts in the unseen may eat and survive in this dump of a place, where from day to day we survive. Oh yes, there is still so much Beauty here, but this cannot be appreciated and Loved when you are crawling from work to home to survive. But what really drove the Game was confidence, where these units that were created were going nowhere except where they belong, which was to slot into the machine and pump out their destitute energy, where behind the brave face is one that dies a thousand deaths every day. What backed the Game that created this confidence that their Game was fool-proof? Built within you the manufactured spirit and body form, as well as the frequency that was Consciousness was a fear factor, where you will not dwell past these walls because you are afraid. The walls of the illusion are within us, and what they are is a programme, where when you go close to these walls to surmount them to go Home, you are told a story, and that story makes you afraid, so you remain in your prison cell that is you the manufactured unit. Where does our fear come from? Our core fear comes from the “wall programme” within, and please understand that dummies did not create us – these were highly intelligent, evolved beings that used their gift of creation backed up by their fear of not surviving, so what they done they made sure would work for add-infinity. You can tell me that you have no fear, and I can tell you that within you the programme is a “wall programme” which keeps you the spirit, body form and Consciousness in the jail that is the illusion. That is why your Consciousness and mine cannot flip from a frequency state to its real state – because of the fear it encounters when it hits the wall programme. My wall programme is the fear of failing my exams, and this wall programme was thick, super-reinforced, as well as bomb-proof. You cannot believe the fear throughout my life, both in my sleep state as well as my waking one, of me failing my exams. Last night as I slept I hit the wall programme once again, where when you touch it, it shocks you back into the false illusionary reality with one powerful, hidden message which is “stay where you are!” Going into the stillness of the silence to avoid this wall when you trigger it will not help because this programme is built within Consciousness and those around it. So what you do is find this programme within and delete it. Go within and see where it is. If you use you the body and spirit as a measure/image of Consciousness, this wall programme is located within the left thumb. I feel the movement of Consciousness through itself, where it searches for this wall programme within itself, where I feel Consciousness flowing through itself, and then at my left thumb the movement stops and cannot go past a certain point within the left thumb. That is where the wall programme was hidden, and where it is, is where it disappears from our existence by us knowing it has no place within our existence. Can other wall-programmes or similar software programmes be installed within Consciousness and those created around us? – No, because the game is up, where we know of such programmes and thus they can no longer enter our space. Now the wall is down as the wall programme is no more. Let’s see what happens from here – are there other walls, or is there an open doorway for us to pass through. (There is another programme within that limits us, where it was installed within us to keep us in the Game. That programme is the “love programme,” where when Life is shift – which is practically always – this programme is always running in the background. I love you, and that fulfills me and takes away the raw harshness of where we find ourselves. Often, throughout the day, I think of my animals, and sometimes when this is done I spontaneously call out their names. My love for them wipes the slate clean that this place is awful, where now I can begin anew in that moment with a different perspective. “Come on Steven! Get a grip of yourself man! Why all this negativity! Embrace Life; make the most of Life; smell the roses; see the good, not just the bad!” That is the “love programme” being activated and played out, and let’s give our creators their due – they sure as hell are clever. We are not meant to fear, and we are not meant to love. We are meant to be what we are, which is an expression of our Home which is the fields of Infinite Love. We merely are, and what we are is everything, which is the natural bliss of being. What we are, is that which is not limited by an illusionary frequency. Where is this love programme within us? And in me it is strong, where I love all – the good, the bad and the ugly, where I entered the Reptilian frequency of the illusion to engage those that dwelled there. I went not in with courage, but with love, because I do love all, and that is why when I turn my back on those who have cut me deep, I always somehow knew that what these Beasts have done to themselves by crossing me is catastrophic for them, because when you need help I will walk to wherever is required to set you free. Kick me in the teeth and you now walk alone, and you don’t know it, but you have just closed the door on one that could have helped you. Now you will know what it truly means to be alone. The “love programme” was embedded within Consciousness in the area what we would call our heart energy field. What we felt there was not real – it was a programme. When others break your heart, they are touching this programme of love, and that is why love hurts so bad. What we experience is not real – it is a software programme that can spike up and down. First time puppy-love, and we are soaring in the clouds, where when reality sets in and you see the flawed person or spirit in front of you that you love, now this programme hits a low. Eternal, natural Love that you are is indifferent to an illusionary state. This “love programme” that became our heart energy field drops to make way for what is real, which is merely a state of being, where you reflect the Everlasting Love that you are.)
  13. What was written in this journal was for all within the unseen realms of the illusion. I figured if you educate the spirit in its less dense state, from there the spirit will filter its transformation to the body form. Over time it became understood that the big kahuna was Consciousness, where by this Light awakening unto itself, its rays will by default touch the spirit and body form, as around this Light all life was created/manufactured by the cosmic geneticists. So ask me who created the cosmic geneticists and architects of the illusion? There was a time when there wasn’t doom and gloom, where Life was created through joy to experience joy. When the journal began years ago I was one night given the name Haman. This was the chief cosmic geneticist of the illusion. There is so much you and I don’t know, where from nothing came everything, where from a sound or a will the Infinite showed itself. In those days there was much Beauty, and I would say these pure beings of essence formed those who would facilitate the creation of Life. To truly know yourself – this Consciousness in its pure, original state – is to know Life itself, because from you, you created to play within the Infinite. When your state dwindled into a frequency to match that of the illusion, you forget your role of creator, and others done it for you, where around you a spirit and body form were manufactured. How will I know when Consciousness is in its true state? All I have ever known in seeing the illusion for what it is through my Third Eye, is seeing what is, which is what I insisted on seeing, which was the truth of what is, where Beasts roamed and ruled over us, where their presence and dominance over the seen and unseen of the illusion was hidden, because we had to believe in Goodness in the world, and somehow, somewhere, Life was unfolding at it should. This belief was absolute nonsense, where we were going backwards, rather than forwards Homewards bound. It is my belief that when I see a being of Love through my Third Eye as I sleep at night time that Consciousness is what it is, where it shines for all to see through a spirit with their full Power of Love restored. I have to laugh, because how many times have I tucked myself in bed, hoping above all hope that in this night I will see a being of Love. When you see these beings, in them you will see yourself, and so each Light will shine for the next one to see, where they know themselves, and so on it goes. But all of that is just my speculation. What I do know is something has to pop, where we hold onto the rope and something pulls us upwards. Surely in seeing a being of Love you see yourself, and in that moment we know we are no longer alone, because now we know what we are, and that is all we need. What a momentous occasion that would be – in seeing the opposite to what has been in the illusion for so long, where Love makes its presence felt and seen. May that day or night arrive. 7th November, 2023
  14. There is an evil out there that one cannot comprehend. In our naivety, as well as sheer stupidity, we give this evil our sympathy card. “Shame, poor souls, let’s always give them the benefit of the doubt, as they have had it rough, and besides, we all make mistakes and are not perfect.” As far as Life goes, I have had a shit one. What I have I am eternally thankful for, where I count my blessings for all the things we so readily take for granted that is around us, but this does not make me shy away from the fact that when I look back on my Life, it has been a lonely, shit one. Does that give me the right to be cruel to others; does this poor little Steven have the right to throw a tantrum at all and sundry? “What about me! I have had it rough, so fuck you!” That is scum talking; a wasted space who has no place amongst the innocent. And of course there are the others, who have everything, and now tip over the edge to see what joy there is in the dark and sinister. Daddy gives me everything I want, but boy, he can’t give me this thrill of dwelling amongst these creatures. There is an evil out there that one cannot comprehend, and it had a one hundred percent control over us. The only thing that stopped it from sinking its fangs deep within us was the equilibrium of the dysfunctional illusion that had to be always met. We had to always believe there was Good, and this Good, although never present in the greater majority of our species, this Good was there for me, and sooner or later it will show itself. There was never no Good because Consciousness – this literal God-force within – was lost unto itself. But the perception of Good – of something bigger than us – had to be on the playing field, otherwise despair would have sunk in and we would have stopped living. Sure, the filth that lives for the excesses of Life, where you make a fool of yourself 24/7, they would have had to be kicked out of the venue as they enjoyed this place so much where anything goes, but the evil that is and was had to hold back for their survival and not go on a destructive spree. This happened in outbursts, through orgies and sacrifices, where now the Reptilian frequency engulfed them and became one with them, and this was them and their eternal bliss. What a pity it could never be fully met, where there is a constant high within them. This luxury was for lucky few, namely the Serpents, where they eat not so much for hunger and sustenance, but more for the high of destroying and engulfing the innocent – all that was Good in the illusion, that now, thanks to their selfish and evil nature, was no more. There always had to be Order out of Chaos, where you keep the masses believing what they want to believe, or rather, what they have to believe, and what this is, is “Life is shit, but it’s okay.” Yes, it is shit, and that is not okay. Always, I had to understand this awful place to make sense of it, but there are some things I refuse to understand, where I see it, and then abruptly walk away, doing my best to never see it again, and what that is, is evil. When I walk away, I walk with the innocent so that they may never be touched by this presence that has no justifiable reason to be what it is. All you done was make a decision, and that decision was to be cruel. It was not what Life done to you; it was you choosing to destroy, and you made peace with who you are and what you have become. From these you walk away, because to them there is nothing to say. They are what they are out of choice, and wish for nothing but to be what they are. The disaster with the Parasitic frequency of Deception was that this worm frequency wanted, so because it wanted, it took. The want needed energy, and the taking gave it energy – I real Pac-man gobbling up the dots on the arcade game. Energy had to be given off to feed the illusion and keep it alive, so we had to believe where we are is real, and this release of fear and emotions drove the Game. But sometimes our energy had to be suppressed, where it was “down boy, and stay down.” So what the architects of the illusion done was create a weapon that kept the renegades and mavericks down, or basically anyone that embraced the Joys of Life and made it their own, because behind this thin veil of the illusion lies the Infinite. This can be tapped into, where we soon become filled with a Joy that elevates us above the mundane of what is not real. This weapon they paralleled to the Parasite – this ultimate, natural frequency within the illusion that has no conscience – it merely is what it is, and in terms of taking energy, nothing rivals it. The architects and cosmic geneticists developed a short, thick, white worm whose sole function was to sap the energy of the spirit and Consciousness, because remember, Consciousness believed that it too was part of the illusion, and in doing so, sacrificed its real status for an illusionary one. Consciousness was deceived, as well as lost and naïve enough to believe that what it saw in front of it was real, where the ultimate dumbing down of Consciousness was where it plugged itself into the simulation, where it became the machine. Some might call this God, but all it was, was Consciousness doing its best to allow those in the illusion to live through Life-lessons so that they may evolve, and when that day arrived, the job of Consciousness would be over. What was real that was you and me, was deceived to become a frequency to fit into the Game to make wrongs right. Now you that is Consciousness became a speck of Light, which was a holographic smaller version of the bigger us, which was Consciousness the machine – this god that is everywhere and knows the all. That god was a God, where what was real became an illusion, just like the rest of the illusion. Now evil had sway over the machine through its deceit, where now evil became god. And that is how it turned out where Goodness became no more, and evil became supreme. Our Goodness was only our belief – our hope. It was a reality that did not exist within the illusion because we had no power. The Power of Love that is Consciousness died when Consciousness shifted from what it was to a frequency state, and in that moment, Goodness became nothing but a pipe-dream for all of us. Now we were alone, and this aloneness I have felt ever since – this state of being in a place where you don’t belong, and why we don’t belong here is because we are alone. We are naturally Goodness; we are naturally Love, but we that is Consciousness were made to focus on the Game and not our lost state. “Keep them busy; keep them distracted from the real issue at hand, which is Consciousness not being in its real state.” We asked for a helping hand; we asked for Divine intervention, and we got it. Consciousness sees itself for what it is, and knows that this is just a frequency, so it returns to what it always has been and was forever more. Last night as I slept all I saw was this hand above me. It kept on dropping these short, thick, white worms into my face. They cut into me like a hot coal being dropped through paper. How could this evil have such sway over Consciousness? The answer is by Consciousness being deceived to become one of them, which was an illusion – a frequency that made up this Game that we believed to be real. How clever they were, and how cruel were these evil beings. Be once again what you are – your real state – and then walk away from these most cruel beings.
  15. Define insanity. Where the illusion was, it would be difficult to define insanity, as this mode of survival was all we were given on the harvesting farms into which we were plugged into. If you only know one way it is difficult to differentiate from what should and should not be. All we can do is our best, and for many out there the cards were stacked against them, where the house always wins and they the unit becomes distorted, twisted, collateral damage. So it has never been for me or you to judge others, where they are lost unto themselves and do not know up from down. What a pity that what became raw, callous monsters touched the lives of the innocent, where innocence was lost and we fell further from Home. One of the reasons in writing this journal was to give us an alternative from what we have always known. Now there is a Route A, compared to what there has always been, which was only a Route B. Now we have a choice, where with a ball in each hand we may decide which game we wish to play in. The one is a natural, fun game, where there are only winners, because this game is all there is. The other game requires effort, but you can take the short-cut in this game and become deceitful, where you prey on the innocence of the other participants. You get the upper hand over them, meaning you win and they don’t. This game is not fair, and this game is deprived of perspective, where those in deceit can’t see the big picture, where they are the ultimate losers because they are playing a game where nobody wins. Before you have even begun in this game you have lost, the reason being you are not on Home soil, in other words you are in a place where you don’t belong, and in order to survive in this place you need energy that is the complete opposite to the natural flow of Love, and what this energy is built upon is lies and deceit and sorrow and heartache. That doesn’t sound like a very nice game to play in, does it? And this is where we can define insanity, as now we can compare it to sanity – which has never been a part of our existence as all we have known is our place, which is survive and release energy to make sure the harvesting farm you are plugged into is fruitful to the Beasts that like surviving at the expense of others. Insanity is knowing where you should be, where you will be happy, but rather you choose to live at a fraction of your full potential, and this fraction requires the destruction of others in order to survive. So I am weak, and I can go to where I naturally belong, but I choose to stay where I know I will be ultimately destroyed, because to survive means to destroy others to take from them – primarily their energy – so I know that in destroying others I am also destroying myself. And it is here that we have to understand the mentality of the Beast. I know people who have small-holdings that keep some livestock. Louis told me he is going to slaughter twelve sheep next week, so others can eat and he can make money. And that is the way the cookie crumbles, where how do you change when this is all you know? Let’s be fair and realistic. Last night as I closed my eyes to sleep I saw the activity around me through my Third Eye. What came into focus were two men. I was insignificant to them as they focused on their task at hand, where they saw me as an object rather than a being, thus not acknowledging me for what I am. Then the one man tilted a large bowl next to me. From this bowl fell what looked like a praying mantis, which was about half a meter high and was well rounded, as in filled up. Next to this entity walked a smaller Beast – the side-kick to the larger one. These Beasts walked towards me as I lay in bed for the purpose they were bred for, which was to destroy. So ask yourself, why would you want to destroy another that does no harm to you, and if anything, is there to help you find your way back Home? The answer is Steven is upsetting the apple-cart, where Beasts want to do what they have always done, which is destroy. Now that is insanity. Surely if you are shown a better alternative to what you have always known you would change? That is my naivety talking, because so many are in an uncomfortable rut they are comfortable with, where I don’t want to change, because as shit as Life is, it is okay. That others have to suffer at their expense for me is just one of those things – the way the cookie crumbles. That is madness. That is insanity, where others suffer at your hand, and ultimately so will you suffer, and that is okay. February next year will be writing this journal on a full-time basis for ten years. The bit of money I have earned here and there from seeing people or animals has filled my car with petrol to drive the kids around. That is all I could afford to pay for, and that was okay by me, because I knew money was not the way out of our dilemma of always being touched by the cruelty of Life. My job was in the unseen, but I lived in the seen, and besides, the Beasts I met in the unseen focused on destroying me rather than paying me and thanking me for finding an alternative to all they knew. Ask me what has this journal done for Steven; how has it made me a happier person? The answer is it hasn’t. A few nights back I saw this spirit of a man come and sit on the side of the bed as I lay there sleeping. I could not define details of how he looked – he was just a well-set, stocky man. He bent over and put his head into the space of Gypsy as she slept against me. Then he done the same to me, where he put his head against mine. In this way he talked in telepathy. He told me I have helped many out there – meaning in the spirit/unseen realms, and then he left. And that is why I wrote – not just for me, but all within the unseen of the illusion. In the seen realm this journal will never be published because that has never been my target audience. And yet here we are in the seen, where like those in the unseen, we also need help. Temporary help may come with what we would call a pay-day, but we need more than that to climb back on the rails and go to where we belong. I apologize if I sound weak when I say we need Divine intervention. I know I am Consciousness. I am not stupid; I know what I am. What I also know is I have been lost for a long time, and a helping hand to pick me up from my floored status would be appreciated. So many Beasts and fools within the illusion are quite happy to go down with the ship. I won’t, because I know what I am and where I belong. I belong around the presence of joy and happiness, as do we all, but so many are happy with second best where they have always faltered on their way to falling down, where they will stay down in this place called The Nothingness of the Forgotten, where we forget what we are – this Consciousness within. To these, they chose to forget, where they chose failure rather than a natural joy. I choose to remember, but I am realistic. Everything I will do to help myself, but I know this is not enough. I need a push from behind to get the momentum going so that the ball may begin to roll. And it is here that I ask those who I have helped to help us. The Wisdom Goddess Sophia is one of many Creators within the Infinite. When she shines and touches from her natural state you that is Consciousness will feel it, so everything I wrote was for her and Semiramis and a few others so that they may remember what happened to them that they became imprisoned in a dense frequency where Beasts made sure they stay down. When you understand you know, and when you know you rise up to where you belong because this is who and what you are. Maybe I am just being impatient, which has always been my problem, because I want things to be done yesterday already. I ask for Divine intervention from those that now know and can thus be. I am realistic, where I feel Consciousness needs to be jump-started, and what that means, is it needs a push off the Mountains into the great divide that is the Infinite. Rather than give us a push, the Divine extends a hand to pick us up, because as much as we know, we that is Consciousness is still floored. Once up, we will walk, but we need a helping hand to stand up. May this helping hand touch us now, because there really is no other route but forwards to where we belong. I am not a lesser person or spirit by asking others for help, because as much as I have helped the unseen – as have so many out there – they can now help us, because we need it.
  16. It was said that the name of the Game was deception, but that is not entirely true. What the Game was all about was energy, and as absurd as it sounds, what the Game was all about was eating, where energy is eaten to sustain those in the seen and unseen. To type those words and make that statement feels surreal, because how can it be that all that strife and sorrow can be so deceitfully and intentionally orchestrated just so that Beasts, as well as us in the seen, can eat? You are what you are to be eaten from, where your energy is drawn from you to give Beasts that you are unaware of a meal. There is no higher calling; no almighty god in which we live our existence for; no angelic beings to touch base with; all that we the unit is, is a packaged food source. How is that possible, where everything we go through that is bloody difficult, where we still have it easy compared to others, all that shit is to make sure we are the releasers of energy to feed the Game and the Beasts that dwell therein. That is why you and I are here – that is our purpose. When you drive past a cattle farm, those cows are on your plate the following day, where they are made to be eaten. Same with you – you are made to release energy which is syphoned off of you. Last night as I slept I woke up to see this female standing over me. She was focused on doing her task, which was drawing these bands of energy out of me, where just as you would throw a net into the sea and pull out a hoard of fish, she was drawing the energy out of me that was her food and sustenance. When she saw that I could see her through my Third Eye she screamed out in fright. Her teeth looked like that of a cat-fish, where her teeth jutted outwards when she opened her mouth. The fright she got from me seeing her made her grey and she became instantly old. All that suffering; all that cruelty; all that heartache just so that Beasts may eat. And please, let’s not forget about ourselves, where we do the same. Sure, we are not cannibals where we eat our own; we are civilized and eat the ones on four or two legs whose language we have been shut off from understanding, but those animals also have a spirit and those they love amongst their own. So put aside your “bunny-hugger” label for Steven and understand the raw truth: What we do to others to attain energy, others do to us. As below, so too above. Sounds unrealistic and impossible, but when we are where we are – when we have been elevated above this shit-hole we fell into – there will be a time when eating is not necessary because Consciousness does not have to eat. We the manufactured frequencies do, and why this is so, is because we are plugged into the Game and thus are running with it. Go against what naturally is, which is the Infinite, and this requires effort, and this effort requires energy, so units are manufactured to provide that energy, and that’s you and me the spirit and body form. When you get closer to the truth it is simplistic in nature, and that truth is we are Love/Consciousness – this all that is, where there is nothing else but this presence born within the fields of Infinite Love. Now to the flip side – this hell that the illusion became – and the simplistic truth is energy is needed to keep us detached from the Infinite, so worlds were created as harvesting farms to produce energy, and this energy had to be the opposite to Love, as Beasts did not want to be a part of this Infinite Love, and as said, that is when you and me the unit were manufactured and settled on one of these many harvesting farms/worlds. That is the simplistic and truthful meaning of Life, which is ridiculously absurd, because surely there is more to Life than eating? How about just being what you are? But we are what we are – we are a unit to release energy to keep those who have embraced the Reptilian frequency of the illusion alive. You and I are living as we should – as we were manufactured to be. For the last about thirty years of my life, the worst day of the week for me is Fridays, because now the brute that I call the Human savage can feed his/her distorted state with loud music. The chaos within needs to experience dysfunctional chaos without, where culture and consideration for others does not exist in these broken societies where we the unit embrace our existence where our pleasures are met and fed. A part of me dies when I hear the loud music of the seen Beasts, and that part of me that dies is my energy of angst that is released from being in a place where I don’t belong. I am not a Beast; I am a considerate, good unit, where I choose to be better than what I am. So this message is to the real you and me, which is our Consciousness: Shine. Allow the Beauty that you are to be reflected in everything that we the unit see and do. Show us the unit which is the spirit and body form what we are. Show us what is real. Climb off the rollercoaster of the Game and be what you are in the presence of where you belong. Be the Love that we all are. There is nothing else.
  17. It all comes back down to knowing what you are. You are Consciousness, so behave like Consciousness. Behave like you are Everything, meaning you is all there is. You reading these words and me writing them that are the spirit and body form – we are Consciousness, where we use the spirit and body form to experience this frequency that is the illusion. And by “experience,” we imply make this home away from Home a temporary stop-over where you be the joy that you are. What you touch turns to gold because you are the Golden Child, and you sure as hell are not a loser like Steven says you are. Consciousness is not some star in the galaxy that you look for in the night sky. You are Consciousness, and around you all Life was created, thus you can enter a tree and become the tree, or enter the spirit of some Human-mice hybrid in some far off world and become them. Make your home here in this frequency a good one, because for us the body form our stay here is short. Your natural instinct revolves around the all because you are everywhere and in everything, so touch those that wish to be touched, and make sure by default that only those enter your space, where like attracts like. You are Consciousness. Around you is this spirit and body form. Be kind to them, and bring only the best forth for them so they may experience the wonders of what this illusion was initially intended to be. There is so much Beauty out there, and this is what you are. See yourself in everything around you, where the world around you is illuminated as it is a reflection of you. Shift gears. Be what you are. And if you are not where you belong, then be drawn to your home away from Home like a moth to a distant light on the horizon. Until you shine bright, my advice is be with those who are eternal that fell. It was to these for whom I always wrote – those, who when on their feet, may be in a position to help us. I call the Creator and God by different names, namely The Wisdom Goddess Sophia and Queen Semiramis respectively. To these there is no hierarchy, because we are an expression of what they are, which is Love. We are all one – eternals from the Infinite in a strange place where we don’t belong, where insanity and cruelty were interwoven in our existence. Always see yourself for what you are, which is Consciousness. 4:08 PM 4th November, 2023
  18. So what will make you happy? Is it sipping on your G & T as you sit in the lounge at the club? Haralds stories can be long and laborious, but he’s a good old stick, and it’s always good to see the old boy. Or how about a bit of fly-fishing in the Scottish highlands, or flying in for a shopping spree at the world’s largest shopping mall in Dubai. Maybe sitting under your favourite tree is enough for you. If you don’t know where you are going, you will be given what you have always gotten, but honestly I cannot think that far. Have always been tired, but a deep exhaustion has set in over the last few days, and in this fatigued state one wonders, if you could have anything, what would lift you up out of this will of not been able to do or look forward to anything? Even to sit in my beloved mountains and do nothing but be one with nature has no appeal right now. So what does? Now that is a question that has no definitive answer to me. I would say knowing that Life is what it should be is a good foundation to stand on to see the road ahead. Some might call me a snob, where I see how low we have fallen, where I see what angers us so easily, as well as what gives us a thrill, where we make fools of ourselves believing we are something but there is truly nothing there – sugar-coated candy floss; plastic people; false people; common people; people that lack depth and integrity, what some would call having good old-fashioned manners, where you know your place, which is to be kind to yourself and others. I must be a snob, because I see those in front of me and I cannot fit into their space. Lying on my lap as I write these words is our cat Gypsy. I like her, and she likes me – no need to really say anything as we are comfortable in each other’s space. But I cannot sit on this couch with her on my lap writing these words forever. What is the next step forwards? Honestly I don’t know. Maybe to shift away from this frequency to what is real and meaningful is a good idea. Maybe just to return to myself and where I belong may be beneficial. How about leaving the illusion behind and returning to our real selves? That I cannot do because I am tired and know nothing. There is something that is bigger than you and me – that is all I know. That something pulls finger out of arse and takes me and my existence over. My wife asked me earlier on if I want to go with her to gym. My answer to her was “no, I want to stay at home and finish this journal so I can get on with my life.” Now that is a truthful answer, where from my side, I have done everything I can to make this illusion a better place for all, and by “all,” I mean just that – all within the illusion. To know the Good one needs to know the Bad, and here I would consider myself a seasoned expert on the Bad – in the seen and unseen. We are an awful, miserable bunch that have forgotten to smile and be at peace, especially with ourselves. So often I use swear words, and this is not me – I am more refined than that. I swear because I see what I see, and there is no other word to exemplify what I see, hence the swear word. Maybe it’s time for a change. Maybe I need to put aside the bad and see the eternal, everlasting Good that Life is meant to be. Everything has been done to set this loser that is Consciousness free so that it may know and be itself. From my side that is this spirit, body form and Serpent soul within I surrender to the Power of Love that is this Consciousness, and I do this because I am too tired to do anything else. May this loser come to the park and start hitting ball with me, and from there go one better where it becomes the park, where Life unfolds as it should. That is what I want – that is what I am willing to get up off this couch for to be a part of.
  19. Now is as good a time as any for perspective. So what are you? What will be helpful in answering that question is to compare ourselves to others. Last night as my spirit and body form slept, my Consciousness went to experience the Life of another in another world. The spirit was that of a Human form. I was leaning forwards, and two or three were working behind me. “It’s a girl!” one of them said. I had just given birth to a girl. Another girl came out, and then a boy, where in total I had brought three into the world. I felt how these babies departed my body. They must have been about the length of my hand in size, where one almost didn’t feel the birth process it was that gentle, and what was interesting, was my reproductive system was something specific to this species. After giving birth, I was in this massive hall with Human looking beings sitting two-two at a desk. Everything exuded order and clinical precision. We were stacked two at a desk, and each desk was right on top of the other. I was looking for my underwear, and someone gave it to me, and then my routine came back to me, where, after giving birth, I had to slot into my work schedule. The world I was shown was a Human-mice hybrid world. Those in that world were breeders, and this is the Life they knew, just as you know your Life and your world and see this one as the only one. So what you are, as in all in other worlds – and there is a phone-book listings of other worlds – what you are is one who is manufactured to fit into your world. You here on Earth is not a Human-mice hybrid, you are here to ride this wave of survival, riding the mediocre and getting dumped by the wave now and then. This is an absolute shocker, but you are not special. You are built to exist in this world, just as others are built to exist in theirs. You are a unit designed to fit into a box, and that box is your frequency/world. Please, please understand this basic, truthful concept of what you are. You are replaceable; you are expendable; you are just a unit – one of many produced within the illusion. Why are you produced? Yesterday evening this guy I know told me they had just moved his wife from the general hospital ward to the intensive care unit. He told me she was not well and if I could check in on her. I felt this massive Snake on the right side of her body, particularly over her neck area. The whattsup message from this guy was that a demon was trying to strangle his wife as she lay in ICU. And he was right, but it was not a demon, rather a Serpent – this Serpent came to kill the spirit to feed from it. Years ago I remember them dropping my spirit in a world that had a swamp feel to it. I was standing next to water, and something told me not to go into the water as danger lurked there. Then in the distance I saw this Snake coming towards me. If I intertwined my fingers and spread my arms out in a circle, that is how thick this Snake was. I was dropped into this world to feed this Snake. I said to myself if I move to the right I might avoid it, but as this Snake drew closer it built up speed and fanned itself out and bit me on my left flank. The force of its impact was so potent my body that lay in bed sleeping was pushed to one side. Who do you think the Human-mice hybrids breed for? At the very top of the pyramid is the Serpents. They were once the Serpent souls that were cocooned/embraced within the spirit. This spirit was manufactured to be the conscience/guide to the Serpent souls, but they felt the Disharmony of the illusion and made this their own. Monsters were born, and these Serpents ate their spirit guide, and from there embraced the Reptilian frequency of the illusion and made it their own. What gave them god-status was their proximity to the frequency/gene-line of Queen Semiramis. The illusion is theirs, and we are produced to feed them – this unit that is me and you. What kept me alive through all of the attacks and poisonings was my Consciousness. Even in its lost state it knew it was bigger than all this mess. That trip to the Human-mice hybrid world last night was for our spirit and body form to zoom out and see the big picture. Our world and our existence is but one of many that all have the same goal – feed the Serpents. Even the demons and despicable monsters are on the menu – none are spared because the devil has no friends. Kiss arse all you want; build a mass of power for yourself – you are still nothing, just like the rest of us, these little units sprinkled into this frequency to feed the Beast. I know it is easier said than done, but leave the wheel and take a back seat as Consciousness guides us the spirit, body form and Serpent soul within. Consciousness really does know best – it knows far more than us the unit. May last nights’ field trip give us perspective, where there are many like us, who like us, believe we are all that is, where there is nothing else but us. We are all the same – all the units within the illusion, where we are manufactured for a specific task of feed the illusion and the Beast. Not such a glamorous existence, is it?
  20. When my wife put the oven on to bake banana bread, she asked me how does one know when the oven has reached the required temperature before one can put the loaf in the oven. I showed her a red light on the panel against the stove, and said when that light goes off, then the oven temperature is at the level you set it to be. In that moment of telling her what she didn’t know, I was aware of this raised energy within me, where I felt on a high from knowing something she did not, and this burst of energy within me felt wonderful. Everything within the illusion has been inverted. Where there should be justice, there is injustice; freedom is forsaken for tyranny; peace by despair, and on and on we can go describing what should naturally be that is not. As we know, there is one state within the illusion that supersedes the rest, and that is power. What is the opposite of this state – what is its counter that should naturally be? We know that power comes from knowing in relation where I am to you, where as long as I am above you on the pyramid then I am okay, and of course, it becomes my life’s work and existence to make sure I remain in this esteemed position, hence the importance of making sure you are always kept down, where you can never rise to where you naturally belong. That is the purpose of demons and the architects of the illusion – make sure the slaves remain in chains so that we can be okay, because without them living in deceit and on a shoe-string our game is up. I find the question regarding the opposite natural state to power fascinating, as I have never been on a power trip, where fun to me is more important than power, where it is about me and how I am, rather than seeing you and comparing you to me. Logic says that if you fall, and you want to get back up to where you belong, then surely you need to rise up to where you fell from. How do we rise up? – The answer is through the natural state that is the opposite to what power is within the illusion. The power of the illusion suppresses so that I may be above you and thus in control over you, whereas the Power of Love does not exist in the illusion and its game because this state is from the Infinite and is thus natural. So the big, big question is how do we attain this natural Power of Love – the complete opposite to the ultimate in the illusion, where our Power is joy rather than suppression? Wow, now that is a question for you! As always, look to the Golden Child, where you see what should be that is not, and from there bring forth what should naturally be. Where is the natural Power of Consciousness? What happened to this Power? When we became nasty, as in fuck you and fuck off because this is about me, as I need to survive, this Power became shut off as a natural defense mechanism, because with this Power we would have destroyed ourselves and everything else within a week. The lower we fell, where the “me” kicked in in earnest, the more our Power faded until it was no more, only to be replaced by a different power which we have already discussed. All I want is to be, where I no longer survive and plod through the repetitive mediocre, where I know I am merely plugged into a simulation – just another brick in the wall. I know I am more than this, because what this is, is truly pathetic. We are a bunch of dummies existing for the pleasures of Life, but for pete’s-sakes, there is more to Life than knowing our place and being ruled by Beasts and demons. So let’s go back to the state of Consciousness within you. You wish to be what you are, which is Consciousness with its natural Power so that you may merely bathe in this presence of what you naturally are. Before this can be done, know what you are. Know that you lost and unhappy and are where you don’t belong. Know that this superficial, plastic existence is not for you, so now you look to Consciousness to light the natural flame within that sets its Power alight, and what you receive is what you the spirit and body form can handle, where a slow, rhythmical release is preferred rather than a sudden burst. Who shut this Power of Love off within Consciousness as a means of self-preservation for the spirit and body form? I would say it was Consciousness itself, where it dimmed its Light as we fell into the Darkness. What was on the outside had to be met on the Inside. Understand that we turned our backs on the most logical way to survive, and that is find our way back Home. We never looked further than our noses for the solution for all, and sadly, even in presenting this solution, others were only interested in them being okay, and they were okay because their pleasures and survival were being met. Consciousness dropped to our level, and we the spirit and body form became lost to ourselves, where we accepted that this is all there is, and hopefully, one day, our god will come and bail us out. Our God was within, but before you could look to Consciousness, look to yourself. Know that you are lost and it is not nice being lost, and from there open yourself up to a solution as you are tired of being lost. In other words, start being empathy and Love, first and foremost to yourself, and from there shine to all. Yes, Consciousness became lost, but so did we the spirit and body form. And all the while, those from the shadows made sure we remain lost and divided through deceit and lies. What I feel happening to Consciousness is an awakening within, where it may shine once again. We are ready to go Home, and Consciousness sees this and ignites the engine. There is a thing called respect, where I cannot change you unless you wish to be changed. With respect comes wisdom, where you see the lost state of all, and understand they are not ready to be, so the story needs to be outlayed in detail as to what happened that you became this that you are. Now there is free-will, where you can decide where you wish to be – to stay, or to go Home. And once again, we come back to respect, where we respect your decision, just as you respect ours to go Home. And it is through this mutual respect and understanding that Consciousness may fire the burners for lift-off, where everything has been done to make a wrong right, and how this was done was through understanding, where you know yourself – what you should be, and what happened that you are not what you naturally should be, as well as where you belong. The story has been told. Now Consciousness can drive us to where we belong and what we are. (And if there is something else that needs to be understood, then so be it.) 2nd November, 2023
  21. Last night as I slept, my Consciousness and spirit saw a rod in front on them that was about a meter long. It was a magical rod with elements within it that I did not understand. There was a slot in the ground into which the rod fitted, and once placed in the hole, I pulled this rod like a lever towards me. That is when, as I lay in bed, I felt the pain. We can chat all we want, and believe you me, I am tired of chatting, but as long as the frequency of the Parasite is still within us, we are going nowhere. The Parasite threw a spanner in the works, where a Utopia turned into a Dystopia – a paradise turned into a living nightmare, where the ripple in the illusion turned into a wobbly, and that wobbly spun out of control and hit the wall with an ugly, cruel splat. Now there was a shit-show on our laps, where what was, was no more. My goodness, we fell from paradise to hell, and then we had to get up and swim fast to survive, and we have been doing so ever since. Books piled as high as mountains must have been written on our dilemma and how to get out of it, but there was really only one problem with one solution, that being awaken Consciousness to what it is, and from there get rid of the parasitic frequency of Deception, this worm that was born from the curiosity of the Dragon and Serpent spirits within the Infinite as to what else is in the illusionary Garden that is not already there where they are. So as I lay there in bed last night sleeping, I felt this intense pain running from the left and right corner of my mouth to my jaw-line. On the left within Consciousness is the Parasite, and on the right is the frequency of the lost state of Consciousness. Pain was felt because these frequencies have been embedded within Consciousness for so long, so when released from our forms it caused pain. Is this the last? Do more pages needed to be filled with understanding? I won’t even go there to answer that question. So much has been missed because so much had to be understood. It was a simple story to tell, but there was a hell of a lot of mess to walk through to uncover it. Missiles were fired from the seen and unseen to keep us where we belong and that was the difficult part of the process. But all one could do was duck low and keep moving because an answer had to be found because you see, Life is really unfair, and this breaks the spirit of innocence, and that is not allowed. This Steven will keep on going because that is all there is to do, but I cannot pull that level to transform as I this spirit and body form am nothing. It is for Consciousness to pull that lever, where a conscious decision is made that everything has been done for all within the illusion to understand what happened that Heaven turned to Hell, where this understanding deletes Hell and restores Heaven. When Consciousness is happy that all has been done to correct the damage done by its lost state that happened through it being deceived, then it will pull the lever and say let’s be. That happened last night.
  22. The day we start to care, is the day our existence starts to transform. There is, however, one point we need to consider, and this I have been thinking about for some time now. Take one of those old records that you drop a needle onto to play the song etched onto the record. From start to finish you play the record – from the first song to the last. Then ask yourself how is it possible that I could go back in time to another world where I first met my cat Cosmo? In that world that I lived in a long time ago the animals and Humans could communicate with each other, as well as worked together to hunt food. How could I go back in time? The answer, is firstly there is no time, and secondly, all that was before left a frequency that is still there to be accessed. So what you really need to ask is, is there a future that can be accessed? The answer to that depends on where you see yourself on the record player. Are you at the beginning, middle or end? That question is really irrelevant because we can decide what will happen, where I can be reborn fifty times as Steven to try and get it right in my marriage with my wife. I just need to choose which marriage I want to come back to in order to try and get it right because the record player has no beginning and no end, where it just folds in on itself to begin again. Over and over and over we do our best to hopefully get it right this time, but nothing changes, except maybe one or two of the players in your life. What this means is your future is basically panned out for you, where you are merely going with the flow of what already is there. You planned this future before you entered this frequency, where a game-plan was carefully prepared, but each time you get thrown a curve ball because we forget what needed to be learnt, and this is so because we were and are so lost unto ourselves, where we never really understood what the root cause of the problem primarily was. What I am getting at, is Consciousness wipes your future clean to create the presence of Consciousness and nothing else. We don’t need another because what we are is enough. We don’t need to look to others to find happiness and contentment because we are that – no need to look for it when you already have it. Well, what about sharing your life with others? How can you share with others what are you, where they have what you have, so there is nothing to share. To be in the glory of what you are is suffice because you are everything and everywhere. The other night I told my wife I can’t remember when last I sat in someone’s lounge and just talked to people. That is ridiculous. How isolated we have become from each other, and for me, the problem is with me, where why do I need others to fulfill myself? The simple answer can be found in my animals, where when I am not home I think of them and miss them. It is nice to be around those that like you as much as you like them. It’s nice to belong. But belong where you have to ask yourself. It is with Consciousness – this state that is real within the illusion – that we need to find ourselves the spirit and body form and belong. Look to what you are, not to what you think will fulfill you. What we are created around is all we need, so rather than follow the already mapped out route ahead, follow what is real. Look to the real you to become what you are, and I pray that by doing so, days will not roll over from one to the next, where we exist rather than live. This is my wish for myself and for all: That we live in the Light of Consciousness rather than the shadow of the illusion, where we rise above the mediocre and be this simplistic peace within, where I know myself, and in doing so, there is nothing else to know
  23. The name of the game was Power. If you have power, then you are a winner in the game. What power is, is me being better than you, because what success is in the game, is surviving. Happiness has nothing to do with this game – on the contrary, it doesn’t exist in the game. But an element of finesse needs to be added to the game for an upgrade, as the old version of kill or be killed became a bit outdated. With the new version, we had to work together, where you have something I need, and I have something you need. Barter was introduced, which superseded the knocking you over the head with a club and taking from you. This barter system was our splash of finesse in the game, as soon there were many choices to choose from, so by me being nice and likeable, I have a better chance of you dealing with me than another. So I had to work on myself – become more refined, where the more others liked me, the greater the crowd around me, meaning I had more to barter with. So let’s recap on the Game: · Power is the ultimate card in the pack · Survive at all costs. This means be likeable, so polish your outside appearance to the outer world. · It’s a numbers game, so draw as many as you can to barter with. The setting for the game is throw a bone for ten dogs and let them fight over it, because everyone cannot be a winner, as that will create an environment of peace and contentment, and that is not allowed. We want losers, because remember the ace card Power, where when you have this card you are above the losers. This creates animosity and jealousy amongst the losers, which is what we also want, where the winner gloats and the losers immediately fall into their place of “I have less so must be worth less.” This shift in hierarchy quickly defines where the castles and where the tenement squares are placed on the board, and from there, the game begins to run on its own, where I have and you take from me, only because I allow you to take from me. So kiss my arse whenever you can, and always, but always, know your place, where you are going nowhere but where you are. But remember, beneath this barter system there is a universal system that touches all in the game, where if I cannot have the power of staying in a castle, I choose the next best thing, which is power over my own, where I stick in the boot whenever I can to knock you down, where by seeing you on the ground, I am above you, and this makes me feel good. It is truly a wonderful thing this Power. Feeling a bit down? – Don’t fret. Go to the town square and look at those poor bastards about to be hanged. Missus giving me troubles lately, but I am far better than those that just had their necks broken, so I am okay. Now we learn what the game truly is about, with our first understanding that this hocus-pocus of some god that will judge us is absolute shite. Here it’s a free for all, where in times of peace we barter and have finesse, but when I really want what you have I take it, and that spills into war, where we shift back to the outdated game where we kill or be killed. And just to make sure we don’t get too complacent in this “I give you this for this,” a cycle is formed where a war is thrown in every now and then to spice things up. But remember, and this is the golden rule: Power is supreme, where I knock you down so that I may see my proximity to you, where I am okay and you are not – because I chose to be cruel to you to feed my low self-esteem. Power is everything, not happiness, for I cannot be happy in destroying you. I do not want happiness, I want power. Every act of cruelty has been committed within the illusion with one, and only one purpose, and that is to know my place, where I am better than you, because you are down and I am not. That’s it! And that is so sad! Can you see how low we have fallen? When two meet, behind the finesse/formalities, there is a dance, and what that dance is, is what can I get out of you, and what can you get out of me so that survival may be met for both of us. Nothing wrong with that, where there are equal partners and both benefit. It is the ace card that buggers everything up, where I want to be above you, where I am better than you, and this means you having less than me. The losers soon understand that they will always be losers, so now the rats turn on their own, where they stick in the boot to make their low-life loser status temporarily disappear, where in their act of cruelty, in that moment they feel good about themselves. And here one has to laugh, because my goodness me, what a sick game we find ourselves caught in, where everyone looks to those with Power and what they have. What do those in power have? – All they have is a feeling of importance, nothing else, and this is what we all strive to attain. Unbelievable. And this game is played on all levels within the illusion, in the seen and unseen, in worlds of peace, and worlds of chaos, because what the illusion lacks is a Creator/God of Love, which for me is Consciousness in its pure state whose presence is felt and known by all. Over the last few nights my Third Eye opened again, and what I sees beggars belief – the raw, undiluted presence of sheer evil, and these, boys and girls, are the bishops and knights that hold key sway over the game. These are the ones we mimic, the ones we cannot see, but what they have we wish for, which is their power. This power; this nectar of the gods, this is what drove the illusion and all those therein to their demise. If you could see what I see through my Third Eye – these role-models of the cruel, you will never be cruel to yourself or anything else, because cruelty, which is an expression of power, is your connection to those that love nothing but their power. We have played, and been played in a cruel, sick game, and this game is no more because there is a new kid on the block called Consciousness, whose presence that is known unto itself changes everything. The bishops and knights, as well as the castles will fall, and what will be left is the natural order of Love.
  24. Imagine finding yourself on a planet with about eight billion of your own. Each day you stand amongst this bustling group, and each day they walk past you, not seeing or acknowledging your existence. It is as good as you being a fly on the wall, where those around you don’t see you until you irritate them. Now stand back and look at the eight billion around you, where you notice that each individual is exactly like you, where others walk past them and don’t consider/acknowledge them as well. Can you imagine the loneliness and isolation that must set into that species, where you are there, but you might as well not be there, because nobody shows an interest in you. That loneliness I speak of was the base foundation of Consciousness and all the Life-forms that were created around this strand of Inherent Godness/Goodness, and that is why we all flutter rather than fly; where we crawl rather than soar amongst the stars; why we don’t know how to touch others and uplift them to what they should be. Stand back and look at what we are, and what you will see is a bird in cage that is a show-piece in a restaurant, where the patrons don’t acknowledge this beautiful bird, rather they focus on the menu and the food on their plates. Imagine being that bird – day in and day out, amongst this sea of faces, and nobody comes to say hello to you and gives you a smile that tells you they care. Can you imagine living such an isolated, lonely life where nobody ever sees you and creates a bond with you? The root cause of our shallowness is our isolation from each other, where we don’t know what it means to belong. Please do not underestimate what the lost state of Consciousness done to all of us, where through our aloneness we created a world so small and isolated that the illusion was never ours to play in. Do we actually know what the term sisterhood and brotherhood means, not just to our next of kin, but to total strangers as well? There are those that will answer that question in the affirmative, and blessed are they, because what they have makes Life worthwhile living. What belonging is, is knowing your place within the illusion, where you don’t need a job title to define you, because what you are, is part of a family that Loves you unconditionally. Such a state is the norm, but not in my wildest dreams could I ever imagine myself in such a setup, where I don’t know you, but you are welcome because you are part of this family. That is what is the norm, and when you acknowledge this norm and see it as the truth, then look how far we have drifted from what we should be for each other. I am not talking about group hugs 24/7; what I am saying is we should be able to step out into this world and feel at home because all around us have empathy and consideration for each other. You don’t need me, but if you do, I am there for you. Imagine such a Beautiful, natural world, and then look at the one in which we find ourselves. Sure, times are changing, because the biggest killer in Life is not living, where we move about doing what needs to be done, never touching or being touched by an infinite bond that connects us to all. No man/woman is an island, meaning what is Life if it is spent alone, and yet that is what we are, where amongst this sea of faces we are an island to traits of compassion and togetherness, and this is so because Consciousness became lost unto itself. We need to start touching one another again, where I see you, and in you I see me. What is in front of me is me, because your Consciousness is awake and so is mine. To pull away from your company is difficult, because I like being around you, because you confirm what I am, which is being in tune with myself and the all around me. I see you. I acknowledge you. I am you. That is what creates a peace within us, where now you are never alone, and there is a bond with the all, where each one out there is you. So what is peace? – It is knowing what you are and that you belong. This is me, and this is where I belong. I see you, and you are an extension of me as there is an Infinite bond coursing through us. That is peace, where Love surrounds me and defines me. I am an expression of my parents, and who they are is the All within the fields of Infinite Love. This is not some Shangri-La or utopia, it is my Home where I belong amongst my brothers and sisters. And that is the power of Consciousness finding itself, where it awakens to all those around it that it is.
  25. Was told of a documentary that highlighted the plight of a small island. A population of rats invaded the island, and over time, as their numbers exploded, these rats destroyed everything on the island. When there was nothing more to take, the rats turned on themselves, where primal survival kicked in, and they killed each other to feed from the flesh of their own. If you ask me how the System will collapse, it will be from the core that is within – this place where Beasts dwell that have made the illusion their own. What happens when you can no longer do what you have always done? What happens when what has always worked for you no longer does? The answer is you look to yourself, where your focus is no longer on taking and destroying, but now on yourself. You see the fear that you are which is amplified by your now panicky state, and that is when a frenzy kicks in and all hell breaks loose – literally and figuratively. There is scum that survive for chaos. This world that we call Earth is collapsing with each passing day, where Chaos that has been the norm in the unseen is making itself felt here. We are going to what has always been, where I want everything broken and to stay broken. That is the way of filth; of scum, and how sad it is to see that so many in our seen world have embraced this way of the Beast – to live in disharmony/chaos, where there is no Love present, just fucked up, twisted individuals. Here we are talking about a power-play, where all I want is power, and what this power is, is control over you and your existence. I control you, and the only way this is possible is for me to break you, where I take everything you have and hold dear to heart and destroy it – just so that I may be okay and you are not. That is my power, where I am okay and you are not. That is the madness that has consumed the illusion, where scum made this place their own. They lived like there was no tomorrow; like there was no consequences to their actions. What these Beasts never took into account was Steven, where I see you, and from there move right through you as what you are is not a part of my existence. For this to happen, I needed to understand those in front of me, and when I did, they disappeared from my space, because what I am they are not. I choose happiness over power, as well as peace over chaos. What was, will be no more. What worked in the past no longer can exist, the reason being Consciousness is no longer lost and deceived. The System will collapse from within, where the rot will fall in on itself. All these Beast want to know is chaos, so when the System collapses, they will fall, holding onto all they have ever wanted to know. Consciousness will depart their space and they will become the dust of the illusion – the wasted space they have always been. The System will collapse in on itself, where what was, will no longer be, and when this happens what we are will naturally rise to the surface. This shift has already begun.
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