whatdoidonow

I don't know what else to put as a subject heading, to be honest. I've went on a rabbit hole tonight, having previously been aware of David Icke from the odd youtube clip, and all I feel now is just fear. I'm a student at university, with what I imagine is a decent life ahead of me, and discovering Icke and the theories has really flipped everything on its head. Obviously I am far from an expert and am at the beginning of my journey into this, but the question I have is what do we gain by not going through the light at the end of the tunnel and coming back to Earth? The idea of the archons seems to make sense to me and there is evidence backing the theory, but what do I gain by leaving the chain? What exists beyond? The Matrix is probably a very common analogy to pull, but is it not worth taking the pill that lets me go back to a normal life and have some enjoyment out of it? I hope it doesn't come across that I'm criticising the movement or the message at all, I believe it; the fact is I'm just scared of uprooting my life without knowing what I gain from it. I hope I don't come across too badly here, this has shaken me quite a bit, but I feel pulled towards it, it's just a matter of taking the final jump then learning more about it.