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oneantisworthtenofyou
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Posts posted by oneantisworthtenofyou
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1 hour ago, Mr Crabtree said:
I just looked in the mirror and I realised I must be a Super Athlete
I have the body of a God, =Buddha!
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6 minutes ago, Mr Crabtree said:
My dear old grandad once gave me some very important advice I'd like to share with any males who want it!
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1/ you need to find a woman who is able to cook, and clever enough to manage on the housekeeping money.
2/ you need a woman who is working so that she can slip you a few quid occasionally.
3/ you also need a woman who's not a munter you'd be ashamed to be seen out and about with!
4/ You also need a woman who's willing to try anything sexual if it pleases you!
Now this 5th piece of info is the most important one,
WHATEVER YOU DO, FOR GAWD'S SAKE, DON'T EVER LET THEM MEET EACH OTHER!
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7 hours ago, Mr Crabtree said:
Go around to a neighbour's or a friends's house really late at night,, knock the door and when they say 'who is it'? stick a large cucumber part way through the letter box and shout out 'it's only me, the Jolly Green Giant, I think I love you'!
This one is going to be right up your street I'm sure
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15 hours ago, webtrekker said:
Damn! You were let of lightly!
Many years ago I was caught counterfeiting Green Shield Stamps (remember those anyone?). I got 6 months and an electric kettle!
More corny than the jolly green giant!
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14 hours ago, - TZC - said:
Stretching humor there, but hopefully I can steer it back. I was out with Sheila and her kid one day in the park. Me and "Teeluck" as I called him (andrew) strayed a bit far toward the woods and we heard "COME BACK" yelled from the path.
When we got back, Sheila told us "stay away from the woods, there's glue sniffers in there"
I immediately shouted "BLUE SNIFFERS!" at the trees, and Sheila nearly had a heart attack on the spot. We never saw any though.
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4 minutes ago, Mr Crabtree said:
Poor guy, fancy a young lad being stuck with a problem like that, I had a similar problem when I was his age, but now fifty odd years later I can look back and laugh about it!
I'm embarrassed to say that I used to sniff leather saddles on fat girls bikes, and then I started stealing the saddles and hiding them in my fridge for sniffing later on when I was alone in my room! However, I was eventually caught when I went to my local cottage hospital with a badly swollen left wrist and sores on my nostrils!
The Magistrates were very sympathetic and asked if I'd ever stolen anything else? I admitted that I had stolen a front gate and asked for four other fences to be taken into consideration! I ended up doing three months in Holloway Prison, the uniforms were weird, but the showers were fun!
The prison was full of rough, tough, hardcases, and some of the prisoners were a bit strange too!
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On 11/9/2022 at 9:16 AM, Macnamara said:
Which whites do you mean?
Do you mean poor whites living in sink estates or do you mean billionaire whites flying around above humanity in private jets or do you mean the whites living under countless different circumstances in between those?
What i do know is that the ten most safe countries in the world have white demographic majorities (plus japan) so i suppose for the majority of the people in those countries life means working hard, raising families, not doing harm to others and generally minding your own business
Black albino whites!
Black albino model accused of white privilege - BBC News
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On 10/16/2022 at 3:10 PM, Steven Tansell said:
Asian baby Mr T ain't shook by the two-faced nature of humanity
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3 hours ago, Steven Tansell said:
Never underestimate the gullibility of the average sponge brained sheeple
they will be conned into believing they are honouring the memory of our beloved queen
goat-legged Lizzie, when in fact they'll be adding even more wealth to the 'Royal' coffers!
She never did a day's work in 96 years
but now she's dead she's bringing in the shekels bigtime {I bet she won't be taxed on that either} 
and don't forget she's got a big bank loan to pay off for Prince Teflon's get out of jail card! He's probably in debt for the thousands of pounds worth of roll on anti-perspirant, his favourite brand is of course, MUM! The chemist asked 'would you like the ball type sir'? Andy said 'Wow, that's a good idea, I was just going to do my armpits, yes, give me two hundred and charge it to mummy'!
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1 hour ago, EnigmaticWorld said:
White Brits or just white people?
I know White Brits are a minority in London, and set to become a minority by 2066 nationwide, but I don't know where Arthur has pulled that 60% stat from. Have they released demographic figures from the latest census yet? Wikipedia still shows 2011 figures.
i looked at an Estimate from the ONS to get the 84-85% figure i looked at a few different sources before posting they all are around
the 80% white area but white is also broken down into British white and (other white in london)
that new data from census 2021 will be released in winter 2022
for london 43.4% are white British & white (other) eastern Europeans etc 14.6% so white total in london is 58%
Almost 60% of the population of London isn't (white British) but a mixture of non whites and white (others)
in some of the northern towns white British are 92%
London the region with the largest estimated proportion of non-UK-born (37%) and non-British (21%) population
A HUMOUR THREAD
in Humour
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