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Status Updates posted by numnuts

  1. Ooh arghhh, ooh arghhh, ooh arghhh. Shoot 'em up the arse. 🤠

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. numnuts


      Ooh argghhh, ooh argghhh, ooh argghhh.

    3. DaleP


      I am having 'holy fuck 😲' kind of day everyday now. It's infinite.

      1 holy fuck of information + innocent book = Mega holy fuck. How far the rabbit hole? 😵

    4. numnuts


      Ooh arrgghhh, ooh arrgghhh, ooh arrgghhh.

  2. A Merry Christmas to all of the good-hearted. However, generally speaking, Christmas in the U.K. in 2023 has become a total abomination.

    1. Certified Green of Heart
    2. Certified Green of Heart

      Certified Green of Heart

      If you prefer just having the link (seeing as this is your profile numnuts), I will offer you the link instead... Feel free to delete the above one or this one... or both...

      but in case you like~ Cheers. here is Feargal Sharkey...



  3. You are on the run in the woods, then stirred from your slumber one morning. You look up to see Whitty and Vallance, holding hands and totally starkers, slowly making their way through the undergrowth towards you. They tell you it is best to just go along with them quietly, for your first vaccination. Is it time to throw in the towel? 

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. Screamingeagle


      the towel


      ominous,if you say so 🤷‍♂️

    3. Certified Green of Heart

      Certified Green of Heart

      • << here is an ominous dot of where the ominiscity is said to have occurred. AAAHH """ THE TOWEL """
      • thank the Lord for that Screaming Eagle. Excuse the now twice shown dots, but we no longer need to worry about that. hehe.


      Recycling is good, and likable enough as you get used to it.


      Go Green... Do Your Bit... Even if that means living out in the Woods. 

    4. numnuts


      I am hypothesising about being accosted by two angry freemasons, fully disrobed no less, and in the middle of nowhere. Who on earth would start thinking about recycling, in that grim situation? Did you used to work at the local council?

  4. Wondering why, when the great and the good meet and banquet, they don't eat bugs and the like to set a good example for the people.

    1. Mr Crabtree

      Mr Crabtree

      They aren't selfish people that's why, they leave that good stuff for us, and they force themselves to eat salmon and beef and oysters, venison etc although it makes them gag just at the thought of it, they persevere because they want us to have the best stuff!👍

    2. Oakwise


      They probably do eat bugs, being insectoids n all. 

  5. Right, let's have a circuit breaker lads.

  6. Ooh arghhh. Shoot 'em up the arse.

  7. High Treason. High Treason. High Treason. High Treason. High Treason. High Treason.

  8. Surging cases!!!

    1. Screamingeagle


      of what?????


      of awakened people!!!!!



  9. The old order is collapsing. This is the calm before the storm. All of the turds are going to be washed well away. About time. Cheers.

    1. dfjkldoioi



      You know what I have been saying myself this is the calm before the storm all year, as we head into fase 2 of the great reset, fase one was covid hoax, and fase 2 will be the financial crash coming on the 30th of this month and as we head into fase 2 expect more covid hoax (fase 3 I recon will be a great reset into the new world order, and thats it game over!)


      huh again!

      All of the turds are going to be washed away, I have been saying since the spring of 2020 there is going to be a lot of pieces of scum s@@t terminated from this fake vaccine! that is the only good bit about opperation lockstep

  10. If it was ok for Jodie Whittaker to get the title role in 'Dr. Who', then Liz Truss should get the title role in the upcoming 'Worzel Gummidge' reboot. She is nigh on there already, but Worzel sported better outfits. As for Tom Tugendhat, I swear I once saw him sucking blood, in one of those 60's/70's era vampire flicks.

    1. Grumpy Owl

      Grumpy Owl

      Jodie Whittaker is a good actress. She was let down by some appalling storylines. The actors who play roles in the theatre of politics, are equally let down by bad scriptwriting.

    2. TetraG


      hmmm, funny numnuts, the mention there of Worzel Gummidge in combo with Liz Truss, was an interesting twist, although at the same time a bit  twisted, haha.  Heard Truss on radio 4 this morn being interviewed.

      And interesting comments in response to Jodie Whittaker by G.O to follow although not followed by me in doctor who or otherwise simply because I don't invest in ANY tv shows myself (apart from occasional online lookups), but still, good to know Jodie has some talent, if that is the belief (and not all the fault of the performer if not the full deck)... 


    3. numnuts


      I didn't watch a lot of Dr. Who, after Whittaker got the role, so I can't really comment on how well I think she did. Reason being, each to their own, I didn't much like the idea of any female being The Doctor. Nothing personal against Whittaker. Truss, so far at least, seems to be doing very well in her new role.  

  11. Where is Priti Patel hiding?

    1. Golden Retriever
    2. numnuts


      Not up Boris's shitter then...

    3. oddsnsods


      wanking over her Liechtenstein Serco funded numbered account?

  12. Is Christmas over now? 🤔

    1. Fluke


      Sort of its boxing day today.

    2. Grumpy Owl

      Grumpy Owl

      Depends on which Christmas really!

  13. So, when did 'Football Focus' turn in to a 'Teletubbies' reboot? They should move it to the CBeebies channel.

    1. TetraG


      I don't even like football but that's funny dude! 👍

  14. I haven't had a good shag in ages. Even Sunak, in stockings and a blonde wig, could probably get my pulse racing. If he isn't 'available', then Patel can be my home secretary for one evening instead. I don't want to get no heart attack though. 

    1. numnuts


      Not had a shag since then either. Even taking Keir up the Khyber doesn't currently seem that a bad thought. The fact that he is seriously konstipated does give some cause for concern though... 😔

  15. Sajid Javid - 'We have all of the booster vaccines ready to go; we just need the arms to put them in. Otherwise, we might well have to resort to 'Plan B'.' I heard it all now. 😀

  16. I switched on the TV the other day, at about 6pm, and I thought I was watching a 'Countess Dracula' reboot on the Horror Channel.

  17. For some reason, I think I am going to feel even sicker than usual this year, when all of the vile creatures start donning their poppies. All of the perished will be well turning. 🙁

  18. Why does Keir Starmer always look constipated?

    1. Grumpy Owl

      Grumpy Owl

      Because he's full of shit?

    2. numnuts


      I reckon he is always forcefully 'packed up' the night before, by some shadowy, robed figures, in preparation for his next bout of verbal diarrhoea.

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