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Mr Crabtree

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Mr Crabtree last won the day on March 2

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About Mr Crabtree

  • Birthday 07/11/1948

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  1. I feel silly talking about this, but something that really boils my piss are stupid 'official speak' phrases that people take in, swallow wholesale then start spouting it themselves!

    Our friend has a twenty eight year old daughter who's in a gay relationship and her and her girlfriend live with our friend and her husband. Whenever her daughter can't get her own way, she often headbutts the doors, walls etc, and several times she's ended up in secure hospital care and usually stops talking to anyone, but texts them instead, even if they're sitting next to her!🤔 The 'official' explanation they've given our friend is your daughter is 'in none verbal mode' Old fashioned thicko's like me remember this as 'not in a talkative mood'! Why doesn't anyone like our friend realise that this is yet another form of controlling people's thoughts and actions to conform to the 'New Normal'? It's like giving them new 'Buzz Words' and our friend at least, loves these silly catchphrases and takes to them like a duck to water! Meanwhile her daughter has taken over their household in a controlling manner, yesterday for instance our friend who's fifty eight years old and has hardly left ever Brighton  came with us to Eastbourne for the day, and as we were driving back her 'None Verbal' daughter rang her demanding to know 'Where the hell are you'? She said driving back from Eastbourne and her daughter said 'well move yourself, I AM NOT YOUR OFFICIAL DOG SITTER'! and then cut the phone call short! I couldn't help saying 'she's not so none verbal now, is she'? She's being mollycoddled by the health people, her girlfriend and both her parents. Her four brothers are not allowed to visit the house, on her express orders, and she's told her parents she needs them to be in bed by ten thirty so that her and her girlfriend can have a good night's sleep with no household noise to annoy them! 

    1. TetraG


      oh boy......I mean girl, girl girl girl, as Eminem says in one of his songs, hehe. 


      I am in "non type-ative mood" atm sorry man.....but I would like to ask whose dog is being baby sitted or dog sitted?


      Is it the 58 year old that likes these ALTERNATIVE WOKE PHRASES then? or whoever takes to them like a crab to water, the one who you say takes to it as would a duck to water I mean? That one? The one that went to Eastbourne with you likes phrases the establishment invent as well as the daughter of hers? 🙃🙂

    2. Mr Crabtree

      Mr Crabtree

      Our friend's dog! She got it from a zoo, there was only one animal in the entire zoo, the rest were cardboard cut outs of elephants, tigers etc, and two stuffed penguins, her dog was the only living animal in there, it was a 'SHIT ZOO'!🤭🤫

    3. Bombadil


      Mr Crabtree that is the cheesiest joke I have heard in a long time!!! Keep it up though. I enjoy your jokes a lot!

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