do you have a "psychic sense" about this please?

[dhama_initiative]

I have this old friend with mental health problems who can be very narcsisstic and demanding in his difficult times, but a good friend a lot of the time. I just wonder if the best path for me is to stop seeing him, or make an effort. Thank you!

[narcolepticwatchman]

I have this old friend with mental health problems who can be very narcsisstic and demanding in his difficult times, but a good friend a lot of the time. I just wonder if the best path for me is to stop seeing him, or make an effort. Thank you!

You already know what the best path is. Don't over-reason with yourself or get caught up with the details and end up inventing some scenario that you don't actually have a clue if it will happen or not. Just let your gut guide you.

[empty v]

You already know what the best path is. Don't over-reason with yourself or get caught up with the details and end up inventing some scenario that you don't actually have a clue if it will happen or not. Just let your gut guide you.

this.

i'd just like to add that if you worry about running into him or him calling you, then you are likely attracting that scenario.

furthermore, when you cut out a negative person the universe tends to fill that spot in your life with more people more to your frequency.

so if this person is leeching your life force (constantly asking for help and never making an honest attempt at helping themselves) then it will be better for you in the long run to cut them out

[phreedom]

'Helping' those in your life who you have a desire to help should never be avoided.

If you are questioning as to whether or not you should or should not, then you are really questioning whether you CAN or CANNOT.

If you find that:

When this individual is going through difficult times... He comes to you with his problems, then you are obviously someone he feels is trustworthy and of significant value when his narcissism grabs a hold.

These people are typically difficult to reason with as their individual needs overshadow the needs of others in these instances. But you, and you alone, from what I gather, possess an influence that could be of significant benefit to him in his difficult times. Abandoning him would only leave him to fend for himself, which is obviously not the best of ways for him to go through the world, as I gather.

To withhold your ability to help this person, if you feel doing so is not a futile endeavor, then you are withholding your love, which, in my naive viewpoint, is probably not the best way to conduct yourself in life.

Best of Luck to you and your friend. I am sure you'll do what is best for you and your friend!

Love and Light

[mrindigo]

'Helping' those in your life who you have a desire to help should never be avoided.

If you are questioning as to whether or not you should or should not, then you are really questioning whether you CAN or CANNOT.

If you find that:

When this individual is going through difficult times... He comes to you with his problems, then you are obviously someone he feels is trustworthy and of significant value when his narcissism grabs a hold.

These people are typically difficult to reason with as their individual needs overshadow the needs of others in these instances. But you, and you alone, from what I gather, possess an influence that could be of significant benefit to him in his difficult times. Abandoning him would only leave him to fend for himself, which is obviously not the best of ways for him to go through the world, as I gather.

To withhold your ability to help this person, if you feel doing so is not a futile endeavor, then you are withholding your love, which, in my naive viewpoint, is probably not the best way to conduct yourself in life.

Best of Luck to you and your friend. I am sure you'll do what is best for you and your friend!

Love and Light


I agree with some of this. I would change this slightly if I were in a situation in which my friend showed these traits. First and foremost, I would simply tell them I had a bit of an issue, but make it clear that I'm not telling them hurt them or ruin the friendship. If he's willing to listen to what you have to say about it, and make some changes, then he's a good friend. If he won't listen and takes it as insulting, then it's a clear cut case of him using you as a sounding board. I can tell you would rather avoid an up front interaction, because you tend to be more of an easy going type. Sadly some things in life can't be treated delicately, and I believe this to be one of the cases. People will only use you and mistreat you if you allow it. ;)
Ultimately though, this all up to you and the choices you make. Who ever posts a possibility is doing just that, showing you the paths you know are there, but need an outside confirmation to better choose the path you feel is correct. I hope it works out for the better. :)

[hajira_c]

:)I think you can't do a lot in this case. Your friend is being too proud and arrogant, and he will never take you serious coze he is always taking superior attitude towards everybody.

The best thing for you is to draw back. If you think of this man as your friend, the feelings are not mutual. Friend of yours envies you a lot and he doesn't have such a good opinion about you. He thinks you are indifferent.

Stay away, you will just keep on feeling worser if you stay by his side. He is not accepting you as a help. Stay positive and mind your own business. That guy can only affect you negatively since he is negative himself.

[tracker]

I have this old friend with mental health problems who can be very narcsisstic and demanding in his difficult times, but a good friend a lot of the time. I just wonder if the best path for me is to stop seeing him, or make an effort. Thank you!

I see , so you think he is narcsisstic , demanding and difficult .

AS though you aint ?

so your not above him then ?

your not me me me me me me me ?

your not being difficult ?

yet you think you are a good friend to him ?

and you think you havent got a mental problem ?

hmmm , interesting .:cool:

[dhama_initiative]

thanks to everyone who replied. I read and thought deeply about every post. I think he's better of with his new friends for a while.