Spriritual conflict with boss

[mila]

I wanted to share the experience I have with my the prinicipal of my school.
I work at a primary/elemenatry school as a teacher and I haven't worked for over a month now because of a medical problem. It still hasn't been solved yet, because -ordinary- Health Care doesn't know what to do with me (...) but they are forcing me to work half days.

My boss is becoming 'colder' every day, in fact, he is using every aspect of the reptilebrain, I realise now. I started working at this school nine years ago and he has changed so much since then. I'm very frustrated now, because I don't know how to communicate with this person anymore. It is something happening more and more in this world of course.

I see the hatred in his eyes when some colleagues ask him something. I Feel his negative energy flowing! I don't think I' m even capable of such hate. (I'm glad)
I'm scared of this man, really. (I'm so highly-sensitive that I sometimes cry after talking to him...I know, I have to protect myself!)
He hates people who can't work for some reason and the people at the school he's really friendly with are the people who are never sick and who don't show any spiritual awakening (the way the colleagues -grown ups-they who teach children-!! treat eachother, is very similar to the bullying in High-school...sad, but true, that kind of energy is affecting me)

Well, the school-system is a place of mind-control, and I work in it....
I work with younger children and try to give them a 'safe' place full of love and that's the most I can do right now. I know this principal sees it and he doesn't like it (me being warm and tender)

This person is the principal of a school! His reaction to the children looks so fake! (so he's not my direct boss, that is the 'city'. but it still feels like that) He is the opposite of tenderness, more coldhearted by the day and I have decided to go to another school (can't do that till summer, that's how it works. I know there must be a better place for me.)

Anyway, I still don't now how to act around this man. I'm changing every day, he's changing every day and we are slipping further and further from eachother. I see other colleagues really 'kissing up' to him, but there is no way I could do that. I can't be a fake. My heart wouldn't let me do that.

Sometimes I think there is a spiritual reason for this man to be 'in my life'.
How will he ever wake up? I have a feeling that this man doesn't like to have any contact with me because I remind him of his softer side and he can't let his softer side come out, because he feels he would be a bad principal.

Does anyone have a similar experience with a boss? This must be happening to more people now there is more awakening going on, there must be a lot of 'resistance' too from others...

[jojo]

yes, its sad that people like that are drawn to work with children... he seems just what the nwo wants in teachers to indoctrinate tomorrows generations to the grand plan.

im sorry to hear your troubles with him. you need to protect yourself spiritually/mentally against this man. do you know of any techniques?

[tracker]

I wanted to share the experience I have with my the prinicipal of my school.
I work at a primary/elemenatry school as a teacher and I haven't worked for over a month now because of a medical problem. It still hasn't been solved yet, because -ordinary- Health Care doesn't know what to do with me (...) but they are forcing me to work half days.

My boss is becoming 'colder' every day, in fact, he is using every aspect of the reptilebrain, I realise now. I started working at this school nine years ago and he has changed so much since then. I'm very frustrated now, because I don't know how to communicate with this person anymore. It is something happening more and more in this world of course.

I see the hatred in his eyes when some colleagues ask him something. I Feel his negative energy flowing! I don't think I' m even capable of such hate. (I'm glad)
I'm scared of this man, really. (I'm so highly-sensitive that I sometimes cry after talking to him...I know, I have to protect myself!)
He hates people who can't work for some reason and the people at the school he's really friendly with are the people who are never sick and who don't show any spiritual awakening (the way the colleagues -grown ups-they who teach children-!! treat eachother, is very similar to the bullying in High-school...sad, but true, that kind of energy is affecting me)

Well, the school-system is a place of mind-control, and I work in it....
I work with younger children and try to give them a 'safe' place full of love and that's the most I can do right now. I know this principal sees it and he doesn't like it (me being warm and tender)

This person is the principal of a school! His reaction to the children looks so fake! (so he's not my direct boss, that is the 'city'. but it still feels like that) He is the opposite of tenderness, more coldhearted by the day and I have decided to go to another school (can't do that till summer, that's how it works. I know there must be a better place for me.)

Anyway, I still don't now how to act around this man. I'm changing every day, he's changing every day and we are slipping further and further from eachother. I see other colleagues really 'kissing up' to him, but there is no way I could do that. I can't be a fake. My heart wouldn't let me do that.

Sometimes I think there is a spiritual reason for this man to be 'in my life'.
How will he ever wake up? I have a feeling that this man doesn't like to have any contact with me because I remind him of his softer side and he can't let his softer side come out, because he feels he would be a bad principal.

Does anyone have a similar experience with a boss? This must be happening to more people now there is more awakening going on, there must be a lot of 'resistance' too from others...


not being funny but if you are so easily influenced that you can break down and cry just even talking to him , surely this constant negativity is not so much in him , but within you ?
after all you have admitted that you can cry after talking to him there for the negative energy is in you too and surely then you see him through a negative way ?

maybe he is just fead up with you thats all .
but so what ?

you have to learn to stand up inside your self and tell your self that you are stronger and worth more than being controlled by your emotions , after all if you have an understanding of the reptilian mind , then be your reptilian minds master and slowly starve it from the emotions that it needs to control you in such a way .

im sure that you havent taken this the wrong way , and im quite sure you know i have experienced what you have in more ways than one .
so get with it teacher of info and love giver to the inoscent , starve your reptilian mind of the emotions it so insessantly wants , and then you will understand him ( the head master ) and will be able to tackle this situation in a multi dimensional way .

KNOW THY SELF , and then you will know your enemy , if at all any exist .:cool:

but thats not to say , it doesnt exist .
just know the beast , and to know the beast you must understand it , to understand it you must allow your self to get close to it either by observation or interaction , but to do this one must also understand and know thy self before hand ,:cool:

[mila]

tracker: I haven't taken it the wrong way, I welcome comments, otherwise I wouldn't be posting.
You are right that a person should not be taken away that much by (strong) emotions.

It would be easier to be grounded if I didn't have the pain (because of trauma after an operation I suffer from a lot of pain)
The pain makes you more vulnerable. I didn't cry after talking to him a few years ago when I was feeling fine. It was 'easy' to stay calm.

The pain is something I have to go through, they tell me this will heal eventually.

I think it's really strong if you have an injury and you still are in control of all of your emotions when dealing with people. They way I see emotions is that they are signals that tell us what is going on inside of us. We are not machines.
And I do think the reason I feel like this is that this person can decide anything that can affect my worksituation.

I do use Reiki as protection (being a Reiki-'master') and it helps, but as everything, healing yourself is the most difficult thing!

[tracker]

tracker: I haven't taken it the wrong way, I welcome comments, otherwise I wouldn't be posting.
You are right that a person should not be taken away that much by (strong) emotions.

It would be easier to be grounded if I didn't have the pain (because of trauma after an operation I suffer from a lot of pain)
The pain makes you more vulnerable. I didn't cry after talking to him a few years ago when I was feeling fine. It was 'easy' to stay calm.

The pain is something I have to go through, they tell me this will heal eventually.

I think it's really strong if you have an injury and you still are in control of all of your emotions when dealing with people. They way I see emotions is that they are signals that tell us what is going on inside of us. We are not machines.
And I do think the reason I feel like this is that this person can decide anything that can affect my worksituation.

I do use Reiki as protection (being a Reiki-'master') and it helps, but as everything, healing yourself is the most difficult thing!


1stly i will apologise , not because i feel i have offended you but because of my absent mindedness .
yes having an injury will sap your energy big time .

i have been in s similar way to that of yours in my early 20s when i was homeless and ill .
i used to cry just by looking at the world so thats really soft isnt it .

i hope some how somewhere in there i made sense , and surely do give you compliment that on top of an injury you are also teaching as well as giving love to many little lovely brattlings ontop of having to cope with a difficult head master .

not being funny but


rather you than me .

hope you have a good recovery soon , actually , i have something to make you laugh if i may be so bold .

go to latest posts and read my thread called

"too much negativity on threads" .

just something to recharge your good feel factor , its good for laughter .

hope you recover soon . piece and love be with you always .:cool:

[mila]

:D
I have an injury, but the surgeons didn't cut out my sense of humour :)

In a way I KNOW that this will make me grow and a better person in the end (I only see part of the road now, not the bigger picture)

Oh, the kids keep me positive, even when I'm in much pain (I don't use painkillers) They know when I'm not feeling well, although I try to act normally. They have a sixth sense about this.
They stop and look at me, hug me and sit with me and that is the best comfort in the world!! When they say: "oh, you have the most beautiful hair in the world", that must make you smile! (no matter how you feel)

I do know, that this boss I was talking about, doesn't have these moments (expressing love=weakness in his eyes) and for that I can actually feel sorry for him.

Talking about awakening: this year has brought me more than thirty years before this one, that sounds weird, but since I have my injury, everything is going very fast.
What seems painful now, will probably be a gift later.
A blessing in disguise as they say :)

Thank you;)

[lhaull]

Mila, if you are a sensitive. You will take on his energy and if that energy is disbling to your system it will need to be released. Weeping is a way we release.
So, you need to block his negetivity.
You need to block his energy period and you need to cut ties to the Him before.
Do you meditate?
Visualize this for me please.
Or even better record your voice reading what I will write and put some music in the background and play it to yourself at bedtime.

Imagine yourself in a place outdoors. A field in summer perhaps. There is only you there, the sun is warm in the sky above you.
Relax and let yourself breath in the light from the sun.
Find a place to lie down and relax on the grass. Close your eyes and allow the light of the sun to warm your skin.
You are safe and protected in this space.
Just allow yourself to relax, let go for the next 5 minutes and be at peace.
The light of the sun is shining down on you, the light surrounding your entire body. You can feel it entering the top of your head and spiraling down your spine. The light easing and relaxing every muscle and joint until it work its way through every system of your being and shines out of your toes and fingertips. Your whole body glowing with light.
Every breath you take circulates this light around your body, the inhaling breath pulling more light from the sun in to you, the exhaling breath expelling any trapped negative energy from your system.
In your minds eye I want you to visualize a cardboard model of your school. You smile and feel at peace because the model was made by one of your class. There is only joy in this little model, the wondrous craft of innocents and love. As you look at the model you see a small cardboard stick figure with a frown on his face. You feel completely as ease, looking at this silly little figure, so much so that you flick it over so it falls onto the floor. Then your focus moves to your classroom, there stands another figure, this time one made of light. Miniature but perfectly formed, its features perfection themselves. As you watch this figure you see that energy is passing from the sunlight within you, directly into the figure. The power of this figure is growing with each breath you take and you can see the light fill the class room, then the hallways and the entire building and beyond. Until the relaxed, peaceful healing light which is filling you, is filling the school through this miniature figure.
As you watch, the figure moves from your class room towards the office where the cardboard figure is lying on the floor. At no time, is the figure absent from the light. For the light is now everywhere.
The figure reaches the office and enters, picks the cardboard figure up and looks at him. The frown is deeper now, and darkness is emanating in waves from the little man but as the darkness reaches out towards the golden figure, the light around the figure is strengthened. The darkness draws back and looks less dense. Again the darkness reaches forth and again without effort it is repelled. We now add voices to the scene all the while watching the scene, the voice are not important, only watching the energy.
He is shouting now, moving around the room, his rage on the boil, His energy reaching out towards the golden figure seems like a crashing wave, ready to spill over her.
The office almost seems lost in the darkness except for a small light. the light begins to pulse as you notice it. Stronger and stronger it pulses. His voice loud and angry now but the pulsing golden light growing bigger and bigger, forcing the darkness back until it finally bursts and golden light fills the room.
The tiny golden figure smiles internally.
Freeze the picture there.
Notice that around the feet of both figures is a circle of blue light.
The circle is actually a figure 8 shape with either person in the other circle.
In your mind see the figure 8 breaking, and becomming two seperate 0's.
The 0's then elongate upwards until each figure is standing seperately in their own blue sphere of light. The golden light of our figure pulsing merrily within the blue sphere.
Feeling joyous you reach down with your finger and pick up our figure, as you do so golden light from your fingertip covers the blue sphere, adding a shield of protection. you move the figure out of the model and rest her on the grass beside you and feel the warmth of her energy.
The sun is still high over head and you breath in the light.
As you do, so does our little golden figure.
As you brush the hair from your forehead, so does our figure.
Until both relaize that each is one and one is the other.
Singular but never alone.



Rinse and repeat as needed.


Bit tired here but I hope you get the idea.

Love to all.

Oh I have just noticed your Avatar pic.
You have the field already apparently, sub the sun for the moon if you prefer.
*Smile.

Blessed be

[mila]

Wow, this sounds so wonderful! Thanks SO much for your big effort!

Is this a meditation/visualisation that you use yourself?
I will try this one for sure (and write back to you personally once I do, for my experience :)) I will record it, oh that's going to sound great, when I hear my own voice, I sound like a little girl (I'll fall asleep :D)

Everytime I think of this man it scares me, tomorrow I have to go there and discuss my half-a-day work schedule and my stomach already contracts.
This must sound very childish to some. I'm just so sensitive...(always been like that, but with my injury I'm even more sensitive)

I try telling myself to send love to this man (I don't hate him, but where is the love when there is fear?) but that's really hard. It's a metaphore for something, I'm sure, it's like you're in school yourself again and the teacher accuses you of not doing your homework, but you actually did and he won't listen to you.

Thanks again!

[tien an]

Wow, this sounds so wonderful! Thanks SO much for your big effort!


Everytime I think of this man it scares me, tomorrow I have to go there and discuss my half-a-day work schedule and my stomach already contracts.
This must sound very childish to some. I'm just so sensitive...(always been like that, but with my injury I'm even more sensitive)

I try telling myself to send love to this man (I don't hate him, but where is the love when there is fear?) but that's really hard. It's a metaphore for something, I'm sure, it's like you're in school yourself again and the teacher accuses you of not doing your homework, but you actually did and he won't listen to you.

Thanks again!


Dear Mila,

It seems you are surrounded by good advice here (I too liked the meditation...mmm).

I'd just like to add a few points...

1. Since it's a professional situation, please try to be more professional. By this I mean not being ashamed of the situation: You are not 'without honour'. You are begging for nothing, since you bring exactly 50% to the negotiation table despite a medical condition. You can be proud of yourself.
2. Basing your behaviour on professional conduct will 'set' your mind/body/emotions for the conversation. If you remember this throughout, you will always be sitting on a thick cushion of credibility, whether you're aware of it or not. You won't be so easily 'rocked'.
3. When you think of this man, it scares you? Perhaps sending 'love' is not the appropriate emotional message to be sending? Goodwill; sure, but you might try a 'confident, meeting-you-halfway, let's shake on it' sort of approach? You are on an equal standing with him.
4. The whole conversation should be very short indeed: What is there to discuss? You have a medical condition, but are willing to fulfil half of your contracted hours; we can review the situation in x months. Agreed?
5. With all of the above in mind, what is it that triggers with you, on an emotional level, when you think of/speak to this man? Whatever it is, is 'just below the surface' as far as controlled emotions are concerned. Either you're repeating a (significant) situation that happened a while ago, or you're reacting to a broader choice of situations, such as 'conflict in general'. What is it with this man that upsets you so much and reminds you of something in your past?
Master this, and you will be well on your way to controlling your emotions.
(There's nothing wrong with a good cry now and then anyway...)

"Know thyself" as tracker said.

Be comfortable in your (sensitive) skin! He obviously isn't comfortable in his.

:)


PS To answer your question on spiritual conflict with bosses...I have worked all around the world, for and with many people.

My worst experience was at the hands of someone who fancied himself as a manipulator: He first attacked the quality of my work (having practically rubbed his hands with glee on seeing the things I could bring to the enterprise...and adopting them...
Then he questioned my choice of career (!).
Then he attacked my psyche by suggesting that it was my emotional instability (?) that...blah, blah, blah
...sound of door closing.

I wept all the way to the train station. Hot tears of anger/shame/injustice.
But I knew I had not been 'without honour'.

[kiwimaj]

I wanted to share the experience I have with my the prinicipal of my school.
IDoes anyone have a similar experience with a boss? This must be happening to more people now there is more awakening going on, there must be a lot of 'resistance' too from others...


I had this boss once who sounded very much like this guy...he hated it when people were off sick...I mean, he really hated it...he found it almost abhorant, like he saw it as a weakness. He really was like a Hitler (and looked like it..even though he is Jewish !). He also couldn't stand it when peole were chatty and having a nice time with each other..I remember one time someone came up to my desk to literally pass a few minutes before going into another bosses office...he came up and made really rude sarcastic comments to the person to stop interacting with me.

He would wonder round the floors checking up on people that they were working. He was an extremely nasty piece of work. But he had a soft side for oriental people, especially young men.. and would go off alot on holidays to the far east...without his wife or family...of course there was the office jokes about ladyboys and such..

Looking back I think he was most probably either possessed/controlled or an reptilian. Honestly, I have worked for some pretty awful people and companies,but he was at the top of the list for horror factor. After a takeover of the company, he lost his job, and strangely enough the company went completely downhill after that !

So I can empathise with your plight, all I can suggest is that you just bide your time until you leave. Also, there is a theory that everyone you come into contact with on a personal level is a reflection of you. If someone provokes a reaction, it's all your stuff. Is there stuff about him that you don't like about yourself?? The more you are happy and content in your NOW life, the more things around you will improve...When you transform, the people you come into contact with will be more on your level and the others will disappear from your life :)

Good luck ! ;)

[lhaull]

Wow, this sounds so wonderful! Thanks SO much for your big effort!

Is this a meditation/visualisation that you use yourself?
I will try this one for sure (and write back to you personally once I do, for my experience :)) I will record it, oh that's going to sound great, when I hear my own voice, I sound like a little girl (I'll fall asleep :D)

Everytime I think of this man it scares me, tomorrow I have to go there and discuss my half-a-day work schedule and my stomach already contracts.
This must sound very childish to some. I'm just so sensitive...(always been like that, but with my injury I'm even more sensitive)

I try telling myself to send love to this man (I don't hate him, but where is the love when there is fear?) but that's really hard. It's a metaphore for something, I'm sure, it's like you're in school yourself again and the teacher accuses you of not doing your homework, but you actually did and he won't listen to you.

Thanks again!

Yes I use it, there are many more, strong deep ways to access yourself while bypassing the perceived problem / confrontation.
As for being scared, when you think of this man.
You need to begin to employ some mental markers. They will at first be used after the fact. You catch yourself thinking of him first or do you feel the fear and then realize you are thinking of him?
Either way, when you get that jolt, press your thumb and forefinger together and mentally say, 'cancel, cancel.'
The cancel command give you ownership of it, as time progresses, you will become more and more aware of the thoughts, which lead up to the feeling and you can begin to cancel the thoughts before the feelings arrive.
Then as time progresses more, you will use 'cancel, cancel' to eliminate things such as negative thoughts concerning self worth, or physical beauty, or Ego rants. Whatever you wish to rid yourself of. I use it to avoid headaches when I feel them coming on.
Then even the 'Cancel, cancel' will be canceled and you will simply close the phone on the stuff you do not require or need in your system automatically.
Takes time but from experience, it works.
I existed in Hell, for 2 years.
I do not mean I was going through a bad time, I mean I existed in Hell.
You can beat this, in fact I have the sneaky feeling that beating it is one of your planned lessons for yourself this life. Not this guy in particular, but rather that to notice your abilities sometimes requires that we are thrown into situations which demand we notice that we have those abilities at out fingertips.
Something that is, and always was in your control.
Do not get me wrong, his energy is his own, but your reaction to his energy is and always will be, your own.
When you take charge of that, you will have moved out of the path of the bullet and you can begin to defend yourself. As it has been, you have stood in the path of his full force, and although it made you weep, you did not die.
Just imagine if you now begin to move position, employ some defenses which you already possess, how would it be possible, after doing that for you to feel any worse than you felt when you stood before him unprotected and unprepared and took the beating?

You see? You have already survived, and now its the time for clean up.

I'll look into doing a post on protective techniques for the forum.
PM me if you need it quickly and I'll work out some strategies with you.

Just remember I'm in Asia so my time difference is 7 hours later than the UK.

Love to all.

[matmantra]

Wow, this sounds so wonderful! Thanks SO much for your big effort!

Is this a meditation/visualisation that you use yourself?
I will try this one for sure (and write back to you personally once I do, for my experience :)) I will record it, oh that's going to sound great, when I hear my own voice, I sound like a little girl (I'll fall asleep :D)

Everytime I think of this man it scares me, tomorrow I have to go there and discuss my half-a-day work schedule and my stomach already contracts.
This must sound very childish to some. I'm just so sensitive...(always been like that, but with my injury I'm even more sensitive)

I try telling myself to send love to this man (I don't hate him, but where is the love when there is fear?) but that's really hard. It's a metaphore for something, I'm sure, it's like you're in school yourself again and the teacher accuses you of not doing your homework, but you actually did and he won't listen to you.

Thanks again!


Don't let go of your sensitivity. Crying doesn't mean that you aren't strong. Empathy and emotions are a very important element that make and KEEP us human. These aspects of ourselves are under constant attack and conditioning, because others who aren't so human don't want us to have these keys to our spiritual and consciousness development.

[mila]

Thanks for your kind words matmantra :D

You are right, those values, if you would call them like that, are truly under constant attack.

I think when you're strong, you can handle these emotions, but when experiencing an extra 'burden' like an injury, it can be extra hard.

I read a book many years ago, about how we treat boys in our society. I think it was called 'Raising Cain' and it talked about the importance of the emotional development of boys. Since I read that book, I would never tell a boy in my class not to cry. It's what I hear so often: You should stop crying, are you a man or what? (!)

[tjohn]

Mila, female or male it's human to feel and it's not wrong to cry but I think you are in the wrong school, or even in wrong job. Emotions are not a weakness of themselves but when under intense and constant pressure it can burn you out - then you wouldn't be able to help the children, or anyone else. Perhaps you could try a different school or a different job?

[tjohn]

Thanks for your kind words matmantra :D

You are right, those values, if you would call them like that, are truly under constant attack.

I think when you're strong, you can handle these emotions, but when experiencing an extra 'burden' like an injury, it can be extra hard.

I read a book many years ago, about how we treat boys in our society. I think it was called 'Raising Cain' and it talked about the importance of the emotional development of boys. Since I read that book, I would never tell a boy in my class not to cry. It's what I hear so often: You should stop crying, are you a man or what? (!)

In the meantime, could you try to write a book? Even if it doesn't get published writing stuff down could help you deal with things. Just a thought...

[badasscass]

best advice i can give comes from a chapter in the Celestine Prophecy?
there's a chapter where they talk about dealing with people's control dramas. in the story they identify four ways that people manipulate (or control) each others energy. everyone manipulates another for energy either passively or aggressively.
clearly your boss is an aggressor.
you must find a way to redirect that energy back to him so that you don't walk away feeling the way you do.