My Awekening & Bi-Polar Disorder

[asdfg]

Hi, I'm a first time poster to these forums and I feel obliged to post my awakening experiences as I have been reading some very interesting posts that I feel I could contribute something valid to.

I have always suspected that something was wrong with the world but I did not actively look into things until about 18 months ago when I first saw Loose Change. After seeing this, I spent a lot of time finding out some very interesting things and a lot of my questions got answered.

This coincided with the final year of my degree and I was under a lot of stress. After my last exam, I felt a huge weight lift from my shoulders and I literally went on a natural high - but it wasn't natural - I really couldn't describe it.

After a month passed, I had lost 2 stone (28lbs) I was having rapid mood swings and begun to have panic attacks. These were followed by manic episodes/psychosis. After one manic episode, I went to my GP, who referred me to specialists who put me on anti-psychotics. I basically didn't take them, then things gradually got better. I lost another 2 stone during the summer, 4 stone in 8 weeks!

The doctors have stated that my manic episodes and panic attacks are attributed to bi-polar disorder, but personally, I believe that these can be attributed to my awakening. One major manic episode I experienced came after watching a Phil Schenider lecture.

So, with what I now believe to be true, I find it difficult to talk to some friends. As I have bi-polar disorder, they will probably think that I am having one of my "days" again.

I have since returned to a specialist and have begun to take lithium. Any thoughts on this? Am I Bi-Polar or have I just woke up?

[montag]

G'day asdfg, welcome to the forum..

There is a thread here (http://www.davidicke.com/forum/showthread.php?t=21164) you may find interesting and helpful..

montag

[tootrue]

Hey
I think this is a great post, because my thoughts are that the Bi-polar Disorder (dis-order!) is very much related to awakening

How? As you start to awaken feelings take over thoughts, and you start to act 'irrationally'. Your mind starts going with the 'flow' (which can lead both - up or down).
One feature of 'bi-polar disorder' seems to be that certain things (in life) become meaningless.

This is very similar to what happens during 'awakening'

I believe that during the so-called bi-polar disorder - rational (or programmed) mind starts to struggle with the awakened mind! So, people would start going with their feelings, and at some point the rational mind would take over (again)! This creates great confusion! It seems to be a fight between awakening and going back to sleep!
Then it all may become even worse - as the person affected, may develop fixation with certain things!

It all originates from the messages from the Subconsciousness, sent to the mind (these messages manifest as intuition).
These messages tell the person that it is okay to do certain things, while the rational mind 'says' the exact opposite!
As the person starts leaping between intuition and rational thoughts, his/hers feelings are pushed back to the subconscious.
The subconscious mind immediately starts 'pointing out', the suppressed thoughts, to the conscious mind. This imminently leads to certain fixations!!

Above I've partly explained the reasons for 'bi-polar disorder', and also how 'Reality' works!

[spinoza]

What are your thoughts on schizophrenia? Does it not sound like the government trying to subtype those who know about the true reality into regions of insanity? Schizophrenics experience paranoid "delusions" like being watched or having thoughts implanted into their mind, seem to believe in "irrational beliefs" like telepathy and precognition and other forms of ESP which arise out of a result of us being attuned with the Universe, and hallucinate, which is due to the powerful life forces in us erupting out into the false five-sense reality. To me, they are people, like the spiritually enlightened, have experienced wholeness in their brains so can converse with the real side of things.
William S. Burroughs (he's fairly reliable, being from the Beat Generation of writers and poets) once wrote "Your paranoid schizophrenia is someone who knows what it's all about".

[dmessick]

Great posts everyone! Is it possible that these bi-polar conditions are caused by food and water additives as well? I was diagnosed with schizophrenia a few years back and have never had an 'episode' and never ever took the poison pills they gave me. I just think I was in an awakening stage at that part of my life and I came out smelling like roses. :)

[spinoza]

Great posts everyone! Is it possible that these bi-polar conditions are caused by food and water additives as well? I was diagnosed with schizophrenia a few years back and have never had an 'episode' and never ever took the poison pills they gave me. I just think I was in an awakening stage at that part of my life and I came out smelling like roses. :)

My friend is "schizophrenic", he considers himself more sane and in tune with things than anyone else. A lot of his ideas he gets are most insightful and incredibly intelligent. I consider him evolved and transcended rather than troubled and "out of touch".
A lot of the great mystics are being popularly disparaged as schizophrenic, even though what they write makes more sense to me than any dogmatic sophist.
My idol is William Blake, it was once written in a critique of him destined to be read in the popular press that "whatever artistic license we may grant this unfortunate lunatic as a painter, we must ignore his deluded poetic writings, if they can be called so". This is disgusting. Blake was an absolute genius whose works were of great beauty. It was reading his deluded writings that changed my life and thought forever. He declared himself to be in Paradise, and sung songs on his deathbed, and produced some of the most beautiful engravings ever made.
Just because these fellows chose not to conform to the norms of society which to them dictated how they should live their lives, they were execrated as mentalists.