Chronic Depression

[akosta]

Hello everyone =D

im 19. suffered from depression since i was 12. recently diagnosed with chronic depression. i have already been through councilling, medication and the best psychiatrists money can buy. nothing changes the way i am. im not really looking for a cure, because i am incurable, because if im not broken i cant be fixed, im not diseased so i cant be cured.

ive figured through my life that this is not a sickness, i am not mentally ill. i actually think im completely normal. my problem is that i can see through the bullshit, and have been able to since a very young age, i dont not wish to spend my whole life trapped in slavery like the rest of the population. i cannot understand how the can blisfully go about their lives, thinking themselves free when they are so obviously being controlled and enslaved. i dont understand how people can just live their lives like livestock. everywhere around me i just see the world turning to shit, rape, murder, violence, drugs and worst of all imo is the media fear mongering.

i spent my teenage years surrounded by drugs and violence, but even now that i am free of these things i miss them, because they game me an escape from reality. i find myself unable to keep functioning as a "valuable member of society" even with the drugs, alcohol and violence gone, i simply find my hate for ignorant and naive people becoming worse and worse. upon seeing a psych i have now been placed back onto fluoxitine (sorry bout the spelling) for the second time, however i suspect that like the last time they medicated me, it probably wont work. because my problem isnt really that im depressed, its just that i can see the truth and no way out of it.

on this forum people have more open minds then the brainwashed masses. i used to have dreams of seeing the people revolt in society, and spend much time thinking of how to fix the problems we currently have, but the longer i live the more i realise that 99% of humanity are nothing more than animals. my question is really one of two parts.

am i completely missing the ball here? is everything i have said complete bullshit and am therefore just plain insane and need to snap out of it?

or am i right?

if im right, how am i supposed to deal with this? cause its proving to be a very tiresome thing.

EDIT: being a total moron i posted in the wrong section. i dont suppose a mod could move this to the general health section or something? sorry bout that

[ex sheep]

Welcome to the forum.



No, you are right, those that can see through all the bullshit will be thought of as insane.

This is a clever prison planet, most don't know they are being enslaved, they think they are free.

There is a thread here which is very interesting http://forum.davidicke.com/showthread.php?t=21164

[truegroup]

Hello everyone =D

im 19. suffered from depression since i was 12. recently diagnosed with chronic depression. i have already been through councilling, medication and the best psychiatrists money can buy. nothing changes the way i am. im not really looking for a cure, because i am incurable, because if im not broken i cant be fixed, im not diseased so i cant be cured.

ive figured through my life that this is not a sickness, i am not mentally ill. i actually think im completely normal. my problem is that i can see through the bullshit, and have been able to since a very young age, i dont not wish to spend my whole life trapped in slavery like the rest of the population. i cannot understand how the can blisfully go about their lives, thinking themselves free when they are so obviously being controlled and enslaved. i dont understand how people can just live their lives like livestock. everywhere around me i just see the world turning to shit, rape, murder, violence, drugs and worst of all imo is the media fear mongering.

i spent my teenage years surrounded by drugs and violence, but even now that i am free of these things i miss them, because they game me an escape from reality. i find myself unable to keep functioning as a "valuable member of society" even with the drugs, alcohol and violence gone, i simply find my hate for ignorant and naive people becoming worse and worse. upon seeing a psych i have now been placed back onto fluoxitine (sorry bout the spelling) for the second time, however i suspect that like the last time they medicated me, it probably wont work. because my problem isnt really that im depressed, its just that i can see the truth and no way out of it.

on this forum people have more open minds then the brainwashed masses. i used to have dreams of seeing the people revolt in society, and spend much time thinking of how to fix the problems we currently have, but the longer i live the more i realise that 99% of humanity are nothing more than animals. my question is really one of two parts.

am i completely missing the ball here? is everything i have said complete bullshit and am therefore just plain insane and need to snap out of it?

or am i right?

if im right, how am i supposed to deal with this? cause its proving to be a very tiresome thing.

EDIT: being a total moron i posted in the wrong section. i dont suppose a mod could move this to the general health section or something? sorry bout that

Hi Akosta, In the 90s I had a similar experience, and found myself getting angry at just about everything reported on TV. It seems so futile to hold onto the thought the world can be better, since there is so much awful shit going down every day all around the world.

My coping mechanism is to rise above it. I strongly adhere to David's principle of sorting oneself out, making sure I don't get wrapped up in hate and things I can't affect. At the end of the day it's all you can really do.

If you carry the weight of the world on your shoulders it will bring you down. Just know it and try to concentrate on your own life.

I don't think there is anything wrong with that. If you let the crap affect your state of mind, the game is already lost.

[freedom1st]

Hello everyone =D

im 19. suffered from depression since i was 12. recently diagnosed with chronic depression. i have already been through councilling, medication and the best psychiatrists money can buy. nothing changes the way i am. im not really looking for a cure, because i am incurable, because if im not broken i cant be fixed, im not diseased so i cant be cured.

ive figured through my life that this is not a sickness, i am not mentally ill. i actually think im completely normal. my problem is that i can see through the bullshit, and have been able to since a very young age, i dont not wish to spend my whole life trapped in slavery like the rest of the population. i cannot understand how the can blisfully go about their lives, thinking themselves free when they are so obviously being controlled and enslaved. i dont understand how people can just live their lives like livestock. everywhere around me i just see the world turning to shit, rape, murder, violence, drugs and worst of all imo is the media fear mongering.

i spent my teenage years surrounded by drugs and violence, but even now that i am free of these things i miss them, because they game me an escape from reality. i find myself unable to keep functioning as a "valuable member of society" even with the drugs, alcohol and violence gone, i simply find my hate for ignorant and naive people becoming worse and worse. upon seeing a psych i have now been placed back onto fluoxitine (sorry bout the spelling) for the second time, however i suspect that like the last time they medicated me, it probably wont work. because my problem isnt really that im depressed, its just that i can see the truth and no way out of it.

on this forum people have more open minds then the brainwashed masses. i used to have dreams of seeing the people revolt in society, and spend much time thinking of how to fix the problems we currently have, but the longer i live the more i realise that 99% of humanity are nothing more than animals. my question is really one of two parts.

am i completely missing the ball here? is everything i have said complete bullshit and am therefore just plain insane and need to snap out of it?

or am i right?

if im right, how am i supposed to deal with this? cause its proving to be a very tiresome thing.

EDIT: being a total moron i posted in the wrong section. i dont suppose a mod could move this to the general health section or something? sorry bout that

Everything you have said makes perfect sense, now all you need to know is that it ain't you! If the world were a sane place you'd probably be thriving right now.

"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society".
Jiddu Krishnamurti

[knewt01]

Hello everyone =D

im 19. suffered from depression since i was 12. recently diagnosed with chronic depression. i have already been through councilling, medication and the best psychiatrists money can buy. nothing changes the way i am. im not really looking for a cure, because i am incurable, because if im not broken i cant be fixed, im not diseased so i cant be cured.

ive figured through my life that this is not a sickness, i am not mentally ill. i actually think im completely normal. my problem is that i can see through the bullshit, and have been able to since a very young age, i dont not wish to spend my whole life trapped in slavery like the rest of the population. i cannot understand how the can blisfully go about their lives, thinking themselves free when they are so obviously being controlled and enslaved. i dont understand how people can just live their lives like livestock. everywhere around me i just see the world turning to shit, rape, murder, violence, drugs and worst of all imo is the media fear mongering.

i spent my teenage years surrounded by drugs and violence, but even now that i am free of these things i miss them, because they game me an escape from reality. i find myself unable to keep functioning as a "valuable member of society" even with the drugs, alcohol and violence gone, i simply find my hate for ignorant and naive people becoming worse and worse. upon seeing a psych i have now been placed back onto fluoxitine (sorry bout the spelling) for the second time, however i suspect that like the last time they medicated me, it probably wont work. because my problem isnt really that im depressed, its just that i can see the truth and no way out of it.

on this forum people have more open minds then the brainwashed masses. i used to have dreams of seeing the people revolt in society, and spend much time thinking of how to fix the problems we currently have, but the longer i live the more i realise that 99% of humanity are nothing more than animals. my question is really one of two parts.

am i completely missing the ball here? is everything i have said complete bullshit and am therefore just plain insane and need to snap out of it?

or am i right?

if im right, how am i supposed to deal with this? cause its proving to be a very tiresome thing.

EDIT: being a total moron i posted in the wrong section. i dont suppose a mod could move this to the general health section or something? sorry bout that

You sound like you are exactly where you need to be, just like everyone else.

"You are chronically depressed" really serves no purpose but to keep you medicated for the rest of your life - it sounds like you quite clearly see that this is not for you. Very often, giving something a name makes it easier for people to wear that name and often, become it.

We all have days of being frustrated with the way things are, but the truth of the matter is, things are the way they are. It appears to me that this is just how "the world" is. Always has been. You could spend the rest of your life "fighting" to change things until they are how you would like them to be, but there will ALWAYS be someone else who disagrees with you and wants things back the way they were. For this reason, there will always be a corner of this green earth that is not to your liking.

I overcame the frustration of that eventually by just realising, perhaps it all really is like this by design. Not "human" design, but whatever you want to call the entity that is reponsible for us all being here on this beautiful planet, in this beautiful galaxy.

I'm not in anyway suggesting you shirk responsibility for your life and your actions, but just play the game. It's that easy. Ever had anyone tell not to sweat the little stuff? In my experience, that advice works just as well for those things you view as insurmountable. You can do what you can do, and that is all you can do.

In a universe of duality, there will always be dark, just as there will always be light. That's just how it works. The trick is to remember the light instead of always facing the dark and letting it get to you. Without the duality, we wouldn't see the difference and there would be no point in coming here at all. We (each of us that view ourselves as seperate from everything else) might just as well stay as nothingness.

The truth of it is we are not all seperate. NOTHING is seperate from us. It helps me to remember this too, when I catch myself being shitty to someone, simply because I'm bored or they have shown me a facet of my "self" I don't particularly like.

Maybe we are all just animals, but what's wrong with that? If you can view an animal as something beautiful and magnificent (which it really is if you take a closer look) then so be it. "It" is conscious creation in action and it can be awe-inspiring, if you could but take the time to consider it. And, "taking the time to consider it" in itself, is a miracle. Aren't you glad you have the capacity to do that too?

If you want to be angry, be angry. If you want to be right, be right. If you want to be happy, be happy. Personally, I like trying all of the above and I find it particularly wonderful that I am able to do so and realise that I am able to do so.

You're doing OK. Chin up ;)

[mariantisocial]

Hello everyone =D

im 19. suffered from depression since i was 12. recently diagnosed with chronic depression. i have already been through councilling, medication and the best psychiatrists money can buy. nothing changes the way i am. im not really looking for a cure, because i am incurable, because if im not broken i cant be fixed, im not diseased so i cant be cured.

ive figured through my life that this is not a sickness, i am not mentally ill. i actually think im completely normal. my problem is that i can see through the bullshit, and have been able to since a very young age, i dont not wish to spend my whole life trapped in slavery like the rest of the population. i cannot understand how the can blisfully go about their lives, thinking themselves free when they are so obviously being controlled and enslaved. i dont understand how people can just live their lives like livestock. everywhere around me i just see the world turning to shit, rape, murder, violence, drugs and worst of all imo is the media fear mongering.

i spent my teenage years surrounded by drugs and violence, but even now that i am free of these things i miss them, because they game me an escape from reality. i find myself unable to keep functioning as a "valuable member of society" even with the drugs, alcohol and violence gone, i simply find my hate for ignorant and naive people becoming worse and worse. upon seeing a psych i have now been placed back onto fluoxitine (sorry bout the spelling) for the second time, however i suspect that like the last time they medicated me, it probably wont work. because my problem isnt really that im depressed, its just that i can see the truth and no way out of it.

on this forum people have more open minds then the brainwashed masses. i used to have dreams of seeing the people revolt in society, and spend much time thinking of how to fix the problems we currently have, but the longer i live the more i realise that 99% of humanity are nothing more than animals. my question is really one of two parts.

am i completely missing the ball here? is everything i have said complete bullshit and am therefore just plain insane and need to snap out of it?

or am i right?

if im right, how am i supposed to deal with this? cause its proving to be a very tiresome thing.

EDIT: being a total moron i posted in the wrong section. i dont suppose a mod could move this to the general health section or something? sorry bout that

no i dont think you're insane i think you're right, i felt/feel the same, like neo that damn splinter in my mind, the prison you cant smell or taste or touch just the vague feeling that there is something very wrong with the world. so i found the truthers, and i found finally what the matrix is what is wrong with the world and then what?

that has taken 3 years to figure out and what i figured out was that regardless of the world which i cannot change there are things in my world i can change, flaws and conditionings forced on me by warped society how it has damaged me that i can fight to overcome and set right, health to attain, spiritual cleanliness (ie watching and overriding my ego and the negative self talk) most importantly allowing, allowing it all, my depression which comes and goes in cycles, all the terror you hear and see, cutting off from the control box, recognizing the bullshit and always holding firm to my mission - to be the best i can be. to regain my personal power. what is your mission and how can you achieve it? small step by small step.

i dont know the bigger picture, but i can paint my picture into something i am proud of, knowing if god exists then surely that is all god asks - that we personally break free of our own bondage and be the change we want to see, ready ourselves - if a showdown were ever to happen am i fighting fit? my ego can make me think right is wrong and confuses me no end, the way i see it is if i conquer the beast within then a stand the best chance of knowing which side im on without being mislead so easily.

[princeofdarkness]

I can totally understand where you're coming from as I've had bouts of severe depression on and off for the last twenty years. I know what it's like to feel totally weighed down: getting out of bed, struggle...brushing teeth, struggle...taking shower, struggle...doing the simplest of chores, struggle...I could continue...

And that's just the beginning. A severely depressed person has to deal with negative thoughts and negative feelings, and they just add to the struggles. Then there can be external environmental interference that aren't helpful in any way. Jobs, tasks, responsibilities...if one with depression can even find the willpower to deal with those...

Also, there are people. No one, and I mean NO ONE, you come in contact with understands how you're feeling, which is way less than zero. They say, "Oh do this or do that...eat better...exercise...meditate...journal...you'll feel better!" and pat you on the head like you're some kind of retard (and you aren't). They start to avoid you when you're not coming out of it and/or you stop returning their phone calls. Making the depression even worse...

I'm probably one of the few people who understands because I've been at the bottom of the depression pit...more than once. It's a complete and utter nightmare to state the least. It made me realize that there is evil in the world, and it's not weak in any way, shape or form. Severely depressed people commit suicide every day because they simply can't deal with their conditions any longer, and personally, I don't blame them.

Depression is a horrible, horrible thing. There simply is no easy way out of it (if I said there was I'd be lying). I have to give you an e-hug to let you know you're an incredibly strong person to have come this far and keep going.

[knewt01]

I can totally understand where you're coming from as I've had bouts of severe depression on and off for the last twenty years. I know what it's like to feel totally weighed down: getting out of bed, struggle...brushing teeth, struggle...taking shower, struggle...doing the simplest of chores, struggle...I could continue...

And that's just the beginning. A severely depressed person has to deal with negative thoughts and negative feelings, and they just add to the struggles. Then there can be external environmental interference that aren't helpful in any way. Jobs, tasks, responsibilities...if one with depression can even find the willpower to deal with those...

Also, there are people. No one, and I mean NO ONE, you come in contact with understands how you're feeling, which is way less than zero. They say, "Oh do this or do that...eat better...exercise...meditate...journal...you'll feel better!" and pat you on the head like you're some kind of retard (and you aren't). They start to avoid you when you're not coming out of it and/or you stop returning their phone calls. Making the depression even worse...

I'm probably one of the few people who understands because I've been at the bottom of the depression pit...more than once. It's a complete and utter nightmare to state the least. It made me realize that there is evil in the world, and it's not weak in any way, shape or form. Severely depressed people commit suicide every day because they simply can't deal with their conditions any longer, and personally, I don't blame them.

Depression is a horrible, horrible thing. There simply is no easy way out of it (if I said there was I'd be lying). I have to give you an e-hug to let you know you're an incredibly strong person to have come this far and keep going.

Me too. I will also say, I was probably a lot like you at 19. In no way does age make it any better, but I am still here and I feel better than ever. So, there's something to look forward to, eh? ;)

[akosta]

thanks for all the replies guys

its good to here perspectives other than the normal psychologist bullshit (get some exercise youll feel better) ill definitly take on board some of the suggestions yall have given me!

[shadowmoon]

I also do not understand why so many people remain so unaware?

I have been diagnosed with depression a few times, I remember once walking to my work weeping at the craziness of modern life.

Some people are just rather more sensitive to external events.

[jizzyjeff]

The question is - and this isn't meant to inflame, it's a genuine thought - who is better off?

The slave who is happy because he doesn't realise he's a slave and he has Sky+ and a PlayStation, or the person who is free and is chronically depressed because of it?

[hadabusa]

dont take any meds from doctors, youll only become crazy from them.

find hobbys you really enjoy.

enjoy life, its 1, its short, dont waste any of it with being depressed.

try to make the best out of it.

[beyonddimensions]

At least half of the western population will suffer from depression at least once at some point/s in their lives. So in that sense, you have quite a bit of company.

If I recall correctly, some of the top predictors of fast recovery are as follows:

1. strong social support network: the more close friends and family you have, the quicker your recovery.

If you associate with habitually negative people, ditch them and find some positive people you can spend time with.

2. you are what you eat (and drink). Ditch the alcohol==it's a depressant. Get off the junk foods and fatty foods. Sugar and fat give you a quick rush, then you'll feel even worse than when you began.

3. join in some meaningful, positive activity: volunteer, get a new job...

4. exercise. this is a great one. Get on a bike, go for a walk, grow some corn. Get outdoors and do something. Hikes are amazing.

5. cognitive behavioral therapy. Change your thought processes. Note your negative thoughts and replace them with something positive.

6. Listen to some great music.

7. Watch some comedy program, or better yet, go to a comedy club. Tell jokes, laugh.

[beyonddimensions]

I really don't think it's either/or.

It is certainly quite possible to be aware as well as generally upbeat, positive and happy.

The question is - and this isn't meant to inflame, it's a genuine thought - who is better off?

The slave who is happy because he doesn't realise he's a slave and he has Sky+ and a PlayStation, or the person who is free and is chronically depressed because of it?

[enga]

At least half of the western population will suffer from depression at least once at some point/s in their lives. So in that sense, you have quite a bit of company.

If I recall correctly, some of the top predictors of fast recovery are as follows:

1. strong social support network: the more close friends and family you have, the quicker your recovery.

If you associate with habitually negative people, ditch them and find some positive people you can spend time with.

2. you are what you eat (and drink). Ditch the alcohol==it's a depressant. Get off the junk foods and fatty foods. Sugar and fat give you a quick rush, then you'll feel even worse than when you began.

3. join in some meaningful, positive activity: volunteer, get a new job...

4. exercise. this is a great one. Get on a bike, go for a walk, grow some corn. Get outdoors and do something. Hikes are amazing.

5. cognitive behavioral therapy. Change your thought processes. Note your negative thoughts and replace them with something positive.

6. Listen to some great music.

7. Watch some comedy program, or better yet, go to a comedy club. Tell jokes, laugh.

This is great advice..I've been depressed previously (severely) and this really helped me so I can vouch for it. Exercise especially, getting up and keeping yourself clean and tidy...if you are yukky you will feel yukky. Get to bed at a decent hour because sitting wallowing late will make you worse and lack of sleep makes you feel bad even if you lay in late. I know it's hard when every impulse is to sit zoned out, do nothing, not even wash or eat but you CAN do it, can look after yourself. If you live with clutter or disorder around you that won't help. I highly recommend FLYlady.net to help you get organised if that is an issue. Lists make you feel motivated if you make small manageable ones the day before and then cross of the 'to do's' after doing them and reward yourself after.

[farros]

Hello everyone =D

im 19. suffered from depression since i was 12. recently diagnosed with chronic depression. i have already been through councilling, medication and the best psychiatrists money can buy. nothing changes the way i am. im not really looking for a cure, because i am incurable, because if im not broken i cant be fixed, im not diseased so i cant be cured.

ive figured through my life that this is not a sickness, i am not mentally ill. i actually think im completely normal. my problem is that i can see through the bullshit, and have been able to since a very young age, i dont not wish to spend my whole life trapped in slavery like the rest of the population. i cannot understand how the can blisfully go about their lives, thinking themselves free when they are so obviously being controlled and enslaved. i dont understand how people can just live their lives like livestock. everywhere around me i just see the world turning to shit, rape, murder, violence, drugs and worst of all imo is the media fear mongering.

i spent my teenage years surrounded by drugs and violence, but even now that i am free of these things i miss them, because they game me an escape from reality. i find myself unable to keep functioning as a "valuable member of society" even with the drugs, alcohol and violence gone, i simply find my hate for ignorant and naive people becoming worse and worse. upon seeing a psych i have now been placed back onto fluoxitine (sorry bout the spelling) for the second time, however i suspect that like the last time they medicated me, it probably wont work. because my problem isnt really that im depressed, its just that i can see the truth and no way out of it.

on this forum people have more open minds then the brainwashed masses. i used to have dreams of seeing the people revolt in society, and spend much time thinking of how to fix the problems we currently have, but the longer i live the more i realise that 99% of humanity are nothing more than animals. my question is really one of two parts.

am i completely missing the ball here? is everything i have said complete bullshit and am therefore just plain insane and need to snap out of it?

or am i right?

if im right, how am i supposed to deal with this? cause its proving to be a very tiresome thing.

EDIT: being a total moron i posted in the wrong section. i dont suppose a mod could move this to the general health section or something? sorry bout that

Improve your diet.

Increase fruit/veg/greens... decrease junk.

Excercise wont hurt either.

[grannymoose]

Depression is a tool to hold the braking of the old to the path in to the new.
It ends when the mind lets go, there is peace at the end.

[sprodz]

I haven't read any of the replies yet. I just read what you posted and I can relate to a hell of a lot of the things you say. I used to suffer from depression because I lost faith in humanity. I dealt with it by shutting a lot of situations out of my life. I'm not saying this is the whole answer to your situation but here are a few things that helped me.

I don't do hangovers. They are an absolute no no for me. A hangover can set me off again easily so I avoid excess alcohol at all times.

Diet & Exercise. Simple changes to your daily routine. Walking, Cycling, simple things like that. Food. Wholemeal bread, Soups, Nuts. I have heard that sesame seeds can have an amazing benefit for our minds.

Get a small tent and some very basic essentials and head into a forest or somewhere quiet and get away from everybody. This helps me understand the world better.

Don't lose faith in everybody because there are decent humans in this world.

I hope that you feel some joy in your life because everybody deserves that.

[beyonddimensions]

Come to the forums and have a laugh at all the shite threads!

[white zombie]

Come to the forums and have a laugh at all the shite threads!

That works :D It really does

[kingldub]

dont take any meds from doctors, youll only become crazy from them.


Couldn't agree with this more. I've suffered for many years now, since my early teens (I'm now approaching my late twenties) and I've been put on countless meds for my depression over the years. None of the meds I've been given have worked in anyway and most have really only made me a lot worse, desperation made me stick to what the Doctors were telling me but earlier this year I decided I'm going the natural route. Never underestimate what a huge difference a change in diet and taking more exercise can have, being more active has made a massive difference for me.

[beyonddimensions]

Even though it's not politically correct to criticize doctors, the abominations and atrocities they are responsible for are really epic in scope.

And the amazing thing is, they'll take the same meds themselves to try to prove to you that it's effective! They'll knowingly damage their own bodies in order to protect their own incomes and their profession!

[white zombie]

This might be the thread to ask others this -

Am I alone in thinking Fear plays a big part in depression, which can lead to helplessness, hopelessness, anxiety and inability to function? Fear of death, pain,sickness, isolation, madness etc

It did for me and was hard to admit to myself. Maybe others have analysed themselves and found this?

[beyonddimensions]

Good question.

There is often a triggering event, and there are also specific personality types who are more prone: especially HSP's.

So a specific percentage of the population may have greater susceptibility, and more difficulty in recovering, i.e., right brained, highly sensitive types.

Often you see a link between especially creative individuals who are prone to bouts of depression, ie painters, singers, intellectuals.

Whether these individuals are more fearful, or whether they can be more accurately designated as more perceptive, can be a matter of word choice or emphasis.

edit: here's an example. Women are much better in scanning around their environment for potential predators. They have to be more aware for obvious reasons. I've often been stunned by how much information a woman has taken in within a split second of entering a room.

And as a matter of fact, some research shows that women are more prone to depression. Or, men are less likely to be seen and treated for depression, or to show symptoms of it.

[iamprobablynot]

And as a matter of fact, some research shows that women are more prone to depression. Or, men are less likely to be seen and treated for depression, or to show symptoms of it.

Yup. Women suffer way more from all all neurotic 'disorders' (depression, anxiety etc) than do men - *now*. What researchers rarely mention is that this was *not* always the case. A report by B P Dohrenwend in the American Journal of Sociology shows that while, prior to 1950, for every 7 men diagnosed as mentally ill, only 2 women were similarly diagnosed, after 1950, the ratio changed to 22 women for every 2 men.

Modern life is particularly and specifically dangerous for women, and anyone who's ever watched Sex and The City or picked up a celebrity magazine probably understands why. The quote's probably already been mentioned, but: "being well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society is no measure of health."

[phemohilia]

This might be the thread to ask others this -

Am I alone in thinking Fear plays a big part in depression, which can lead to helplessness, hopelessness, anxiety and inability to function? Fear of death, pain,sickness, isolation, madness etc

It did for me and was hard to admit to myself. Maybe others have analysed themselves and found this?

"Fear is the mind killer...."

Dune (3/9) Movie CLIP - Fear Is the Mind Killer (1984) HD - YouTube

[white zombie]

"Fear is the mind killer...."



It really is. No one is free unless they are free of fear.

[lizzyking]

They shut the water off at my place today. I'm experiencing a little fear of thirst cuz I can't pay bill at the moment. But I can scam water from outside spigots where water is on, and fill bottles. Haha, there are businesses that have automatic sprinklers that are running sometimes when it is raining. :rolleyes:Fear of being smelly too since I can't shower, but I can go to YMCA to cope with that. I can dig a hole in the backyard to shit in by garage, where nobody can see me and call the police for public defecation. Haven't figure laundry out yet, can't really afford laundry mat at moment since I can't pay water bill. I can get free wifi, but won't be online much at home if they shut electricity off, laptop battery can only hold a charge for so long, then its up to the cafe to recharge if I can buy a cheap house coffee to sit there for as long as I like. This is a macbook and has good resale value so might sell it anyway, can always get another one when times are better and I have my shit together. There is no welfare for single males, but foodstamps (200 a month)

[lizzyking]

Michigan has one of highest unemployment rates in USA. I am depressed but not depressed, I guess it could be worse as I am not in homeless shelter (yet), where they make people sleep sitting up in hard rubber chairs that are easy to clean vomit from, cuz of drunks. The shelter is really crowded too.

[lizzyking]

Whats most depressing is I've had thoughts of dressing up like a ninja and hiding in shadows near a drive up ATM, and waiting for somebody driving something like a Lexus to pull up. Pepper spray in face or something. But I don't think I could live with myself if I terrorized somebody that way, even though I think I could get away with it with a good escape route (and cameras near ATM wouldn't be able to ID me). Petty criminality. I have a brain so its beneath me too in a way. Burger flipper jobs open up though and they get flooded with applicants, and they are more likely to hire somebody dumb or who has military service record. Two of the clerks at the gas station nearby are young guys who are Iraq/Afghanistan war vets.

[blackstar76]

Lizzy. Can't your mom take you in for awhile or help you out?

[lizzyking]

They fought a war for the oil/gas corps, now they are rewarded for their service as being higher on the list as eligible to be hired, when there is a job opening to man the cash register where they sell the gas. heh.

[lizzyking]

Lizzy. Can't your mom take you in for awhile or help you out?

Nah, she is living with her boyfriend. And he has two kids of his own. She wants me out of here anyway I think so she can sell the place since her biz is on verge of bankruptcy, she is behind on the property tax and it might go into foreclosure if she doesn't rent it or sell it.

[lizzyking]

She has all of her other properties rented and for sale right now. Its a bad time to sell property too, its all moving slow unless it goes real cheap. Great time for somebody loaded to be buying up real estate at fire sale prices.

[lizzyking]

The only thing safe is one of her Florida properties, where she will move, Florida state law says they can't take your primary residence in bankruptcy proceedings, everything else has to go though to cover debts.

[lizzyking]

I'll make it somehow. I became dependent on her when I moved back here from Florida and went to work for her, and now I am screwed. Been one disaster after another. She had a battle with breast cancer, then feds raided her business over something that was bullshit so she had to do a product recall even though everything tested fine with controls, so lost some customers (was considered contaminated in a bureaucratic sense because of minor improper paperwork), and some of her suppliers have gone belly up in the economy, so she lost more customers to competition when she couldn't get product to them on time during scramble to find new suppliers.

[lizzyking]

I'm kinda pissed off, I asked her a few years ago to put this place in my name as a precaution against something like this (getting taken away in a bankruptcy proceeding or something), but she wouldn't do it, wanted to keep it as an asset to borrow against.

[lizzyking]

lol, midnight Operation Secure H20 was a success. Five gallons of water, and its even purified and non-fluoridated!


http://i56.tinypic.com/acc4rk.jpg


Gimme some water - YouTubehttp://youtu.be/lsYndo1NslE


I took it from storeroom where I work part-time in barter for rent, there is bunch for the water cooler.

Work part time for rent? Well yeah I am a sole survivor, 4 other people were laid off this year, its down to bare bones and losing money. Its a long fucked up story, maybe partially on topic as it economic depression, hopefully not chronic though. I was fulltime but never on payroll, which fucked me for collecting unemployment (people get up to a year with extensions in MI). But, I had company vehicle, gas card, place to stay with all bills paid, was on group insurance plan for health, and the balance I got in cash. She made out, got to claim me as dependent on personal taxes for a deduction, and no payroll taxes on me at biz. All that is gone with exception I have roof over my head and that has become very tenuous.


.

[lizzyking]

Here's what will happen. Primary residence in FL, in Collier County, over looking Gulf of Mexico. 6 close to 7 figure real estate? Funnel as much into that before bankruptcy. After bankruptcy proceedings she can sell and move into something more modest, collect SS as she is retirement age, maybe start a new small biz with her connections if she gets bored with retirement.

[lizzyking]

I'm gonna figure out a way to get a job at Whole Foods. I have a plan, interning as volunteer first at health spa place that will give me room and board in exchange for labor, that will look good while applying for jobs, as its industry-related to Whole Foods (they detox people at spa, and rebuild health with organic raw food). Be a model employee at Whole Foods. I can even keep getting food stamps while there probably for a time, if I can show I am barely making ends meet on paper (which might be case for awhile anyway). Bonus is I get employee discount on groceries. So be a model employee and maybe work way into dept specialist or something managerial. Go to trade school for massage therapy training and license while working and then become self employed by building a clientele.

[beyonddimensions]

I used to make the most amazing sandwiches buying produce at Whole Paycheck, I mean Whole Foods. :)

Good luck, brother.

[lizzyking]

Thanks beyond!

[lizzyking]

Five gallons of water is a little heavy! Bike wanted to pop wheelies with that on back, I had to lean into handle bars to balance it out. :p

[lizzyking]

Let's see, I live on a peninsula in the world's largest surface area of fresh water, second largest reservoir in the world volume-wise. Water is not a rare commodity around here:

Great Lakes - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I'm starting to get pissed off more than feel like a loser who can't pay his bills.


They shut it off for being a month behind and owing them $117.

I am single, I don't water the lawn, usually don't take long showers, have an efficient front loader for washing clothes, which I also don't do frequently (not the type to do laundry every time there is more than a pair of socks dirty... I pack it). I mostly drink filtered bottled water. What is wrong with this picture, it can't be costing that much to try to poison me with fluoridated water.



http://i54.tinypic.com/2h3bxqw.png

YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.http://youtu.be/m1cv2IjKkic

[crystalline]

just checking in to see if you've managed to sort out the water situation Lizzy?

Do you know anyone who could possibly loan the money to you, or do you have anything you could pawn or something?

I wouldn't ordinarily advocate something like that for paying a bill, but you gotta have water.

Can't believe they would cut off the supply. :mad:

[lizzyking]

Hi crystalline! Thanks for asking. It's going to be turned on after the weekend. Property owner (my mother) is going to pay for it. Her money situation is tight now too, but I made her aware its logical for her to do so as property owner, regardless of whether or not I am her son. Otherwise the upkeep of the place will go to hell in a handbasket. Hard to wash a floor without water, heh.

[lizzyking]

Things might turn around business-wise too if the storm can be weathered. Her primary (bread and butter) business was medical diagnostic tests. VERY competitive business, believe it or not. She has had it going on almost two decades, but it has gotten to the point where the kits almost have to be given to customers free, so major volume is only way to make money, and as I explained earlier, there have been major setbacks. So she is trying to start up another business, and her largest property is well suited for it, a specialty property designed for labs, (research, drug manufacture, etc) fume hoods, gas lines for various gasses, corrosion resistant countertops, etc. There is unrented space in there now. She was able to renew her medical laboratory clinicians license recently that she worked under as a hematologist when she was much younger (before starting her business), and is now working on starting up her own medical lab by partnering with a doctor, so things might turn around and the other incorporated business dissolved without a bankruptcy proceeding that would have them coming after her property that is not part of that corp.

.

[beyonddimensions]

lizzyking is a great example of how to break out: TAKE ACTION. Just about any action is better than inaction and contemplation, well as long as it's not illegal obviously.

An object in motion...

[lizzyking]

Heh, thanks Beyond. I don't know if I deserve that much of a compliment insofar as being a good example, but now that you mention it, I have always been a believer in the motto, "Just do something, even if it is wrong!" :p

[crystalline]

Lizzy, glad your water will be back on this week.

I'm in business too and like your mom my business is taking a hit big time at the mo. Just invested a large amount on stock in the hope that because I bought big at reduced rate I can make back what I've lost in lost revenue/turnover over the last six months, however that means the capital funds are now depleted and not sure if I will be paid this month. Corporation tax bill needs to be paid next month too, so if I get no sales fast well......


Just spent our last pennies on a few groceries, no money now until Tuesday, which isn't too far off but other half dropped the freakin milk!

I started stressing over it, then laughed and said to him, I aint gonna cry over spilt milk!

You got to laugh to stay strong.


All this shit aint that bad, it's not gonna kill me or make me pregnant so I'm still trying to smile. :D

[phemohilia]

All this shit aint that bad, it's not gonna kill me or make me pregnant so I'm still trying to smile. :D

That is hilarious and awesome!!! :D

Good luck to you both (Crystal and Lizzy) with all that you've got going on!!

[lizzyking]

Good luck to you both (Crystal and Lizzy) with all that you've got going on!!

Thanks Phem! You too, whether or not you've got anything "going on", heh :)

[lizzyking]

You got to laugh to stay strong.




Literally spilt milk, eh? :D

Too true about the laughter. Especially the manic laughter, just make sure the men in white jackets aren't lurking nearby....bwhahahaHAHAHAHA!!

Songs with laughter (Part I) - YouTube
http://youtu.be/pE-5NT-QbL4

[akosta]

sup, been away a minute but im still live and kickin lol

was put on prozac for a couple of months. even though i told them i had already tried it to no avail (typical) so i humoured them. they told me that it wouldnt work if i didnt believe it would (wtf? this aint ment to be spiritual healing or a placebo effect) anyway after doubling the dosage... twice... with zero positive effect and plenty of negative i just stopped taking them.

after i stopped taking that, i tried a tablet of ritalin, felt completely normal for the first time ever. i could appreciate colour and nature and didnt feel like i was living in a warzone. most bizzare thing tho was when that wore off, it felt like my blood was turning black, i could feel my mind twisting back to my usual state, felt like pure hate was flowing through my veins. real confusing stuff.

so now they are gonna test me for some other shit, and see if i should be on ritalin instead....zzzzzzzzzz.

in the mean time i dont really sleep anymore, still no motivation but i generally get 5-10km of walking/running in a day (no car, so i be walking anywhere if i need to). councillors arent much help, neither are psychs, mainly i think because they are so indoctrinated that they try and narrow everything down to one label (like depression or some other mental illness) without actually thinking about shit. they just follow their little book and i send them on a wild goose chase. its a sad world when someone who spent years getting a degree gets tricked into playing fetch by a 19 year old lol. consider suicide everyday but fuck it, as i said to my psych, im notoriously hard to kill, suicide is just too easy for me lol so ill keep movin on.

someone mentioned something bout fear a while back, fear aint my problem, death pain and suffering hold virtually no grain of fear for me =P cant stand fear, i find it annoying.

lizzyking, i dunno how you keep on the straight and narrow in your circumstances, if i were you i woulda been on some crooked shit long ago, keep doing your thing, itll work out for ya =D

[crystalline]

sup, been away a minute but im still live and kickin lol

was put on prozac for a couple of months. even though i told them i had already tried it to no avail (typical) so i humoured them. they told me that it wouldnt work if i didnt believe it would (wtf? this aint ment to be spiritual healing or a placebo effect) anyway after doubling the dosage... twice... with zero positive effect and plenty of negative i just stopped taking them.

after i stopped taking that, i tried a tablet of ritalin, felt completely normal for the first time ever. i could appreciate colour and nature and didnt feel like i was living in a warzone. most bizzare thing tho was when that wore off, it felt like my blood was turning black, i could feel my mind twisting back to my usual state, felt like pure hate was flowing through my veins. real confusing stuff.

so now they are gonna test me for some other shit, and see if i should be on ritalin instead....zzzzzzzzzz.

in the mean time i dont really sleep anymore, still no motivation but i generally get 5-10km of walking/running in a day (no car, so i be walking anywhere if i need to). councillors arent much help, neither are psychs, mainly i think because they are so indoctrinated that they try and narrow everything down to one label (like depression or some other mental illness) without actually thinking about shit. they just follow their little book and i send them on a wild goose chase. its a sad world when someone who spent years getting a degree gets tricked into playing fetch by a 19 year old lol. consider suicide everyday but fuck it, as i said to my psych, im notoriously hard to kill, suicide is just too easy for me lol so ill keep movin on.

someone mentioned something bout fear a while back, fear aint my problem, death pain and suffering hold virtually no grain of fear for me =P cant stand fear, i find it annoying.

lizzyking, i dunno how you keep on the straight and narrow in your circumstances, if i were you i woulda been on some crooked shit long ago, keep doing your thing, itll work out for ya =D

I was put on prozac too, many years ago, but decided to stop taking it. I can't say how it happened and exactly how I escaped from the imprisonment that is depression, but I just made the decision to stop taking the drugs, both recreational and prescribed, and try and take it one day at a time. I'm not going to go into what caused the depression for me, I'm still working through all that, and now I've come to a point where I accept I can't change what happened, I can't understand why things happened as they did, but I can change what happens to me in the future. Always bearing in mind that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
I still have downer days, but I don't go to the black place anymore.
I hope everything works out for you too mate, and hope that this may help your worldview a bit.

[beyonddimensions]

akosta, congrats for rejecting the pharma, proud of ya. :)

[lizzyking]

lizzyking, i dunno how you keep on the straight and narrow in your circumstances, if i were you i woulda been on some crooked shit long ago, keep doing your thing, itll work out for ya =D

I guess I have a faith that things will improve, and the odds of that improve if I do something ("anything!" lol), even though there are no guarantees.

Oh I dunno, I never put a gun in somebody's face, but "straight and narrow" is somewhat subjective. For example, many years ago when I went through a bout of this economic related depression that was even worse, I went around "salvaging" without a license and permission:eek:. Technically thieving I guess, roaming around, finding vacant buildings and yanking the copper out to take to a metal scrap yard. Not exactly straight and narrow, since somebody or some entity owned them even if they were foreclosed upon and/or abandoned commercial properties, :p One was public owned perhaps...that is to say, once I found a large school building complex in the suburbs that had been closed down forever because of asbestos in the building (and was eventually demolished later after I'd been through it) that nobody else had gotten to with similar ideas, and wow, I made a lot on that, seriously was set for awhile and it helped turn things around! Went in at night, and I used what are called "come alongs" ( a small winch type device that was hand cranked) to yank large diameter/wide-gauge copper cable through the conduits it was strung through. The guy at the scrap yard was giving me a lot of sideways glances, heh. I wonder if I have asbestos in my lungs now tho:o I probably shouldn't be confessing to crimes, but its all way way past statute of limitations, and who is to say I am not just making all of this up :cool: I never pulled the aluminum siding off of a house that somebody was living in though :eek: People will do fucked up things if they feel desperate, but gotta try to draw the line somewhere.

Anyway thanks akosta, things will work out for you too.

[lizzyking]

I was put on prozac too, many years ago, but decided to stop taking it. I can't say how it happened and exactly how I escaped from the imprisonment that is depression, but I just made the decision to stop taking the drugs, both recreational and prescribed, and try and take it one day at a time. I'm not going to go into what caused the depression for me, I'm still working through all that, and now I've come to a point where I accept I can't change what happened, I can't understand why things happened as they did, but I can change what happens to me in the future. Always bearing in mind that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
I still have downer days, but I don't go to the black place anymore.
I hope everything works out for you too mate, and hope that this may help your worldview a bit.

Maybe the drugs actually helped in a sense, to get through a pinch, but some can be tough to withdraw from. I've heard SSRI drugs can be very rough to withdraw from even if they aren't commonly used or abused for recreational reasons, since there isn't much of an euphoria (if ever), or rapid tolerance. Why do I say helped? Well like you said, one is a permanent solution to a temporary problem, and its easier to quit taking drugs than quit being dead, so if one really feels suicidal? Hrm, between the two options, if those are all one knows insofar as options. :( I've been there a couple-few times in my life for non-economic reasons. They call it 'ideation', looking at the attic door and thinking about how a rope or a chain tied to the rafter beams would do the trick.

Glad to hear you're through whatever you went through, I sense it was really quite horrid for you since you mentioned suicide.

[revolutionary_jam]

ayahuasca.

[crystalline]

I guess I have a faith that things will improve, and the odds of that improve if I do something ("anything!" lol), even though there are no guarantees.

Oh I dunno, I never put a gun in somebody's face, but "straight and narrow" is somewhat subjective. For example, many years ago when I went through a bout of this economic related depression that was even worse, I went around "salvaging" without a license and permission:eek:. Technically thieving I guess, roaming around, finding vacant buildings and yanking the copper out to take to a metal scrap yard. Not exactly straight and narrow, since somebody or some entity owned them even if they were foreclosed upon and/or abandoned commercial properties, :p One was public owned perhaps...that is to say, once I found a large school building complex in the suburbs that had been closed down forever because of asbestos in the building (and was eventually demolished later after I'd been through it) that nobody else had gotten to with similar ideas, and wow, I made a lot on that, seriously was set for awhile and it helped turn things around! Went in at night, and I used what are called "come alongs" ( a small winch type device that was hand cranked) to yank large diameter/wide-gauge copper cable through the conduits it was strung through. The guy at the scrap yard was giving me a lot of sideways glances, heh. I wonder if I have asbestos in my lungs now tho:o I probably shouldn't be confessing to crimes, but its all way way past statute of limitations, and who is to say I am not just making all of this up :cool: I never pulled the aluminum siding off of a house that somebody was living in though :eek: People will do fucked up things if they feel desperate, but gotta try to draw the line somewhere.

Anyway thanks akosta, things will work out for you too.

Lizzy your story reminds me so much of an age old tale my old man tells of when times were rough and him and his mates were out of work and they went out to nick copper piping. Apparently this piping was on a bridge and they weren't sure whether it was wired or not so they took it in turns cutting through it with a saw, ten strokes a piece. It literally was russian roullette sweat on the brow stuff. :D I've never really been on the bones of my arse in an economic sense where I've needed to do what you have to do to make ends meet, so in that sense I count myself lucky. Glad that even in such times though you had the morality to distinguish how far to go, total respect to you Lizzy. A corporation or two can afford the odd missing parts, and disused buildings, I'm sure. ;)

Re; your post about looking at attics and wondering about the semantics of ropes etc..., didn't realise it was called ideation. I tried the box of pills, it didn't work, but for a long time I would think of the different ways etc... I distinctly remember working in London at the time and travelling back home by train and looking out the window knowing the door could open and how quickly it would all be over... It's a horrible place to be.

Akosta I wish you all the best mate, stay strong and try not to let the fact that your awareness of what is going on in this world be a drain on your soul. Try to see the positive within yourself rather than the negative in the world, and focus upon that.

[lizzyking]

Lizzy your story reminds me so much of an age old tale my old man tells of when times were rough and him and his mates were out of work and they went out to nick copper piping. Apparently this piping was on a bridge and they weren't sure whether it was wired or not so they took it in turns cutting through it with a saw, ten strokes a piece. It literally was russian roullette sweat on the brow stuff. :D

Russian roullette indeed :eek: My heart rate went up a notch just reading about it, heh.

I hope they had sense to at least wear thick rubber boots and gloves, and some sunglasses so they wouldn't be blinded if it went BANG from an electrical explosion:cool:

[revolutionary_jam]

The Facts About Spanking - YouTube

[beyonddimensions]

Sometimes, all it takes is time. You just friggin' forget what you were upset about.

I find a good beer with friends, and/or a kickass cheesesteak sandwich alleviate grumpiness with stunning efficiency.

[302bluefog]

Sometimes, all it takes is time. You just friggin' forget what you were upset about.

I find a good beer with friends, and/or a kickass cheesesteak sandwich alleviate grumpiness with stunning efficiency.

Right...

[beyonddimensions]

One more thing to add: the most accurate predictor of depression is one's sense of "locus of control."

If you feel you are in control of the situation, you are less likely to become depressed, and more likely to recover relatively quickly if you do become depressed.

If you feel like the external environment dictates how things turn out, rather than your own actions, then you are more likely to become depressed and will recover more slowly.

Therefore, cognitive-behavioral therapy can be very important: if you train your mind to focus on what you control, on things you can do to rectify your situation, your ability to rebound from trying or traumatic events is greatly improved.

[beyonddimensions]

Oh, and watching comedies is supposed to be a big help as well.

[madgoone]

Yap YAP im depressed !fix it quick

depression can be a deficiency

i researched how old school doc's helped/cured depression

full b-complex
niacin high dose 500mg and above works just dont get shocked when you have a flush
vit c to lower cortisone release(stress hormone)

and anything else missing in your diet such zinc,magnesium etc

read up on how deficiencies cause depression and fill in the gaps plus exersise to block bad hormones getting to the brain

[blackstar76]

Yap YAP im depressed !fix it quick

depression can be a deficiency

i researched how old school doc's helped/cured depression

full b-complex
niacin high dose 500mg and above works just dont get shocked when you have a flush
vit c to lower cortisone release(stress hormone)

and anything else missing in your diet such zinc,magnesium etc

read up on how deficiencies cause depression and fill in the gaps plus exersise to block bad hormones getting to the brain

I agree. You ain't getting something from diet or exercise. Work out and eat proper and then label it.

[boggumbap]

To all the people advising a better diet and exercise, someone with depression wont have the motivation to do that. First of all they need to snap their brain into a new frame of mind and this takes some doing.

This reminds me of the South Park episode, I think its called 'Youre getting old', where everything looks and sounds like crap, finally hes diagnosed with cynicism.

Im the same, I think I can see through all the crap. However, do you think there are no happy enlightened people on this planet? I find that hard to believe; they must exist and they must have the secret on living life without going insane and without blocking everything and everybody out. Sometimes I feel like Ive signed up to live inside a video game, only to find out it was a lot more boring and meaningless than I expected. But something tells me theres something out there that will give my life and this world meaning. Maybe this is our test, to find the beauty in this life, and failing that, to create it? You gotta lose yourself to find yourself, and all that.

Sorry to go on, I hope you read this and make some sense of it. Just remember youre not alone.

[sillybilly]

My heart goes out to anyone suffering from depression. It could be clinical - ie a PHYSICAL EFFECT - due to connections going haywire or it may indeed be an ultra awareness of the way things are.
It certainly is difficult to just 'snap out of it' as one of the things that goes is motivation.
I know it's difficult but try to write down 3 good things about your life or maybe something that happened to you today. Write it down and look at it before bedtime. Because in the midst of all the sh*t this world dishes out, there is good as well as bad. Gradually you will retrain your brain to look at the positive as well as the negative. It sounds simple doesn't it. Try it...
The other thing is setting yourself tiny tiny goals. It could be as simple as tidying out a drawer. Not the whole piece of furniture - just one drawer.
Give yourself space. If you won't give time to you, who else will?

[beyonddimensions]

The condition is very common. Here is a story about Jerry West (one of the greatest basketball players of all time) and his lifelong battle against depression:

sports.yahoo.com/nba/news;_ylt=AuztUoofDkGsJHdPG2ZLw3i8vLYF?slug=ap-jerrywest-depression


"Jerry West says he has battled depression since childhood, when his father would beat the future Hall of Famer, causing low self-esteem that has plagued him despite a successful career as one of the NBA’s biggest influences.

West says his West Virginia childhood was devoid of love and filled with anger as a result of his abusive father, who left him feeling tormented and worthless.

“I would go to bed feeling like I didn’t even want to live,” West says in a segment airing Tuesday on HBO’s “Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel.”

“I’ve been so low sometimes and when everyone else would be so high because I didn’t like myself.”

West’s memoir, “West by West: My Charmed, Tormented Life,” is in stores Wednesday. It’s a book his wife, Karen, their four sons and his four siblings didn’t want him to write.

In the HBO interview, West describes his father beating him with a belt, saying, “It was brutal.”

He says he never knew what would set his father off. It wasn’t until his father hit his sister that West found the courage to stand up to the man that had abused him. At 12, West kept a shotgun under his bed and threatened to use it on his father if the abuse didn’t end.

When West’s father died of a heart attack, he attended the funeral. He cries in the interview as he talks about wondering whether his father would be proud of him and his achievements.

West says his depression never bothered him as a player during 14 seasons with the Los Angeles Lakers because he was so driven by a fear of failure. However, once the season ended, he would dwell on the defeats, including the Lakers’ six NBA finals losses to the Boston Celtics.

“He wouldn’t speak for days at a time … It worried me,” Karen West says, adding that “Jerry doesn’t say `I love you.’… Maybe once a year.”

West tells HBO he tried therapy, but gave it up, preferring to take Prozac and work through his depression by himself. He says his condition has eased in the 10 years since he served as Lakers general manager. He now works as an adviser to the Golden State Warriors.

“I’m the luckiest person in the world,” he says."

[302bluefog]

I think this more proof that depression is what happens to us thru negative life events.

If his dad did not beat him and he never lost six NBA finals to the Boston Celtics would he feel this way?

I doubt it, you cant take pills for that.

[waymarker]

Quote- "Jerry West says he has battled depression since childhood, when his father would beat the future Hall of Famer, causing low self-esteem that has plagued him despite a successful career as one of the NBA’s biggest influences.

West says his West Virginia childhood was devoid of love and filled with anger as a result of his abusive father, who left him feeling tormented and worthless.
“I would go to bed feeling like I didn’t even want to live..”

-----------------------------------------------------------------

I had a shit dad too, he was a workaholic and used to vent his stress by using me as a verbal punching bag (nothing physical), and I grew up feeling shy, insecure, low esteem, under-achiever etc.
When i got older he stopped it because I was too big for him to bully any more and we never spoke to each other again, and i began papering over the holes he'd put in my self-confidence. They're still there but are hardly noticeable any more.
Lots of other kids had krap dads too, so it's by no means uncommon, we just had the bad luck to draw a dud, that's all..:)

[hypnoticspectre]

Problem is that our human emotion binds us, makes us hold on to negative entities, the best way to combat it is through not allowing yourself to be connected to it, the buddha once said: All wrong-doing arises because of mind. If mind is transformed can wrong-doing remain?
Everyone is victim to the slavery of mind, suggest take yourself outside of it?

[originn]

Akosta, have you got dental amalgam in your mouth?

[revolutionary_jam]

Hello everyone =D

im 19. suffered from depression since i was 12. recently diagnosed with chronic depression. i have already been through councilling, medication and the best psychiatrists money can buy. nothing changes the way i am. im not really looking for a cure, because i am incurable, because if im not broken i cant be fixed, im not diseased so i cant be cured.


One thing you could try is a thorough liver cleanse, you know, like one of those diets that takes a whole week

I hear if your liver is full of toxins there's little you can do to avoid feeling depressed

A Theory of Mental Health Part 1 - YouTube

[boudica52]

As it is well known, vitamin D is necessary for healthy bones, but it might be also helpful in fighting depression and some other mood disorders. Some researchers believe that decreased exposure to sun, resulting in vitamin D deficiency, is in direct connection with depression. Numerous studies also revealed that there is a connection between seasonal affective disorder, severe depression, premenstrual syndrome and vitamin D.

It is considered that vitamin D stimulates the serotonin level of the brain, which could affect the depressive symptoms. Seasonal affective disorder – SAD – might also be influenced by vitamin D deficiency. According to some conducted studies, vitamin D has a greater effect than light therapy in people with this disorder. Light therapy boxes do not release ultraviolet rays, which are needed for the body to produce vitamin D. The seasonal affective disorder is most frequent during the winter time, when the rays of the sun are very weak.

According to some other studies, people with heart diseases and decreased vitamin D level are more inclined to depressions than people with normal levels. Additionally, older people could be more predisposed to various mood disorders because of vitamin D deficiency. Researches revealed that mothers who failed to get a lot of sun during pregnancy, have children with higher chances to develop schizophrenia at some point in their life, as compared to mothers who spend a great deal of time outdoors.

Many people wonder if it is recommended to take vitamin D supplements. Although the connection between sunlight, vitamin D and depressions is not entirely obvious, people not getting enough vitamin D might not present deficiency symptoms but have instead depressive symptoms. It is important to talk to your doctor before taking supplements as you could get excessive vitamin D, more even if you have kidney disease.

[akosta]

went to a dif psych, have been diagnosed with ADHD and probably dysthemia.

so now i take ritalin but it has interesting effects.

it appears to block me from deep thinking. which is a peculiar drug to give someone, why stop them from thinking and from feeling? only 2 answers in my opinion.

1. im paranoid and batshit insane.

2. im completely sane and the cure for sanity is a drug to make me docile.

methinks i know which one it is... but then again no matter who you were your own personal answer would be the same.

[boudica52]

ADHD linked with 2 Vitamin & Mineral Deficiencies - YouTube

[jimo]

I know of several people who have been helped out of their depression by practicing Chi Kung (Qigong). One of the things about depression is that it causes, or is caused by, a stagnation of the person's energy flow. Chi Kung can get this energy moving again, as well as clearing out all sorts of negative energy from the system and traumatic memories from the unconscious (that are often holding the depression in place).

If this makes sense to you then try going on the "Shaolin Chi Kung" section of this forum:
http://www.wongkiewkit.com/forum/
and asking them what they recommend (You will need to register first). Several members there have used Chi Kung to overcome chronic depression, so they know what they are talking about, and are usually very generous with their responses.

And NEVER doubt that you can, and will, overcome the problem one day, and that you will then be in a position to help others overcome it too.

All the best,
Jimo.

[302bluefog]

As it is well known, vitamin D is necessary for healthy bones, but it might be also helpful in fighting depression and some other mood disorders. Some researchers believe that decreased exposure to sun, resulting in vitamin D deficiency, is in direct connection with depression. Numerous studies also revealed that there is a connection between seasonal affective disorder, severe depression, premenstrual syndrome and vitamin D.

It is considered that vitamin D stimulates the serotonin level of the brain, which could affect the depressive symptoms. Seasonal affective disorder – SAD – might also be influenced by vitamin D deficiency. According to some conducted studies, vitamin D has a greater effect than light therapy in people with this disorder. Light therapy boxes do not release ultraviolet rays, which are needed for the body to produce vitamin D. The seasonal affective disorder is most frequent during the winter time, when the rays of the sun are very weak.

According to some other studies, people with heart diseases and decreased vitamin D level are more inclined to depressions than people with normal levels. Additionally, older people could be more predisposed to various mood disorders because of vitamin D deficiency. Researches revealed that mothers who failed to get a lot of sun during pregnancy, have children with higher chances to develop schizophrenia at some point in their life, as compared to mothers who spend a great deal of time outdoors.

Many people wonder if it is recommended to take vitamin D supplements. Although the connection between sunlight, vitamin D and depressions is not entirely obvious, people not getting enough vitamin D might not present deficiency symptoms but have instead depressive symptoms. It is important to talk to your doctor before taking supplements as you could get excessive vitamin D, more even if you have kidney disease.

I agree that the best cure is a lot of sun...

[thecatsmeow]

went to a dif psych, have been diagnosed with ADHD and probably dysthemia.

so now i take ritalin but it has interesting effects.

it appears to block me from deep thinking. which is a peculiar drug to give someone, why stop them from thinking and from feeling? only 2 answers in my opinion.

1. im paranoid and batshit insane.

2. im completely sane and the cure for sanity is a drug to make me docile.

methinks i know which one it is... but then again no matter who you were your own personal answer would be the same.

The problem, I feel, is always with the diagnosis! You are experiencing a psychic awakening and you need to reconnect with nature and with your real self. Not an easy task in this, artificial, environment. I advocate watching some of these videos, the concepts worked wonders for me, perhaps they'll help you? If not, you know you can always come to the forum to vent your feelings :)

Bi-polar or waking up? (5 videos)

Jaques Ellul "The Betrayal by Technology"

[pinkiepie]

akosta i would like to help you.
here is how to cure your problem:
1) get a PET
2) fall in love, even if the girl rejects you
3) get an orgone cupcake, they make help you transmit some bad energies into happyness.
4) share what troubles you with the people you love, parents etc, talk about it be social. you need to GET OUT MORE, you need to spend times with people you love.
5) get a goal in life..you need something to keep you excited about living!
since you see through all the bullshit, why not try to find a way out of the matrix? go read on occult/alchemy/esoterics.

[pinkiepie]

best thing i recommend is a VACATION.
go on some exotic place, go on the bazaar, buy some weird exotic spices perhaps? or a vaze? get a whore! go dip in a roman bath!

[madgoone]

Has anyone mentioned the amino acid tryptophan,this is needed for serotonin/melatonin production along with magnesium(chelated) and the b12 complex vits,if your short on this stuff your going to depressed for ever.Also vit c will lower output of stress hormones:)

[dawkinz]

Things you should look into

Fish oil
Exercise
Lifestyle changes
Hypnosis
Ketamine

[mr_i_disagree]

what if you suffer from agoraphobia?

[tenzingnorgay]

Hello everyone =D

im 19. suffered from depression since i was 12. recently diagnosed with chronic depression. i have already been through councilling, medication and the best psychiatrists money can buy. nothing changes the way i am. im not really looking for a cure, because i am incurable, because if im not broken i cant be fixed, im not diseased so i cant be cured.

ive figured through my life that this is not a sickness, i am not mentally ill. i actually think im completely normal. my problem is that i can see through the bullshit, and have been able to since a very young age, i dont not wish to spend my whole life trapped in slavery like the rest of the population. i cannot understand how the can blisfully go about their lives, thinking themselves free when they are so obviously being controlled and enslaved. i dont understand how people can just live their lives like livestock. everywhere around me i just see the world turning to shit, rape, murder, violence, drugs and worst of all imo is the media fear mongering.

i spent my teenage years surrounded by drugs and violence, but even now that i am free of these things i miss them, because they game me an escape from reality. i find myself unable to keep functioning as a "valuable member of society" even with the drugs, alcohol and violence gone, i simply find my hate for ignorant and naive people becoming worse and worse. upon seeing a psych i have now been placed back onto fluoxitine (sorry bout the spelling) for the second time, however i suspect that like the last time they medicated me, it probably wont work. because my problem isnt really that im depressed, its just that i can see the truth and no way out of it.

on this forum people have more open minds then the brainwashed masses. i used to have dreams of seeing the people revolt in society, and spend much time thinking of how to fix the problems we currently have, but the longer i live the more i realise that 99% of humanity are nothing more than animals. my question is really one of two parts.

am i completely missing the ball here? is everything i have said complete bullshit and am therefore just plain insane and need to snap out of it?

or am i right?

if im right, how am i supposed to deal with this? cause its proving to be a very tiresome thing.

EDIT: being a total moron i posted in the wrong section. i dont suppose a mod could move this to the general health section or something? sorry bout that

I see all the societal problams you do but I'm not depressed about them. Depression has very little to do with what's going ona round you. Depression is about you. The most common cause of depression I'm aware of that is usually undiagnosed is lack of zinc. Take a good zinc supplement for a week. If your problem is zinc deficency you will feel better fast.