Children Don’t Like School, Says Report

[bicycle]

CHILDREN don’t like going to school and would prefer not to have to do any work at all, according to a major new study of education in Britain.



60% said they would prefer to play computer games with their friends instead of listening to a man with poor personal hygiene reciting the names of the Kings of England.

The other 40% said they would be happy if they never saw another sum and instead got to sit on the sofa all day watching repeats of Balamory with a a bottle of Tizer and a tube of Pringles “as tall as a house”.

Professor Robin McKay, the report’s author, said: “Children do not like travelling to school, they do not like the work they do at school, they do not like being given homework and they do not like sitting tests. They think all these things should stop right now.

“They are also deeply concerned about global warming, terrorism, the gulf between rich and poor and whether that big fat ginger bastard is going to steal all their crisps at lunchtime again. They think we should stop all those things right now too.”

Eight year-old Paul Bates, said: “I want to live in a castle and have a big sword with magical powers and a dragon I could fly around on and I’d like my friends Rob and Alan to come and live with me although obviously I would be the king and everything and they would just be my slaves. And we would not allow no girls.”

But educationalist Professor Henry Brubaker disputed the report’s findings and cited his research which proved that children should just sit down and shut the fuck up for 18 years.

He said: “Tell them to sit down and shut the fuck up.”

[illuminotti]

:):)

[auron]

Lol! Where are you getting these from??? :D:D:D

[pollock]

Funny:D
F

[quester123]

:D
A really good report Bicycle, thanks!

[graflok]

Gosh, you don't suppose that adults don't like to pay taxes do you? :D

[gremlin]

could it also be that the classrooms are to diverse?

[sukyspook]

Whoever said that schooldays are the "best days of your life" was a LIAR

Also, homework is a conspiracy to pit parents against their children - that old chestnut 'divide and conquer' (- or is it conker....)

[gremlin]

Whoever said that schooldays are the "best days of your life" was a LIAR

Also, homework is a conspiracy to pit parents against their children - that old chestnut 'divide and conquer' (- or is it conker....)

i totally agree;)

[knightofthegrail]

"Kids dont like school"

Erm, no shit sherlock! :rolleyes:

[de_shit]

I'm glad I'm out of it. I graduated from high school last June and Ive forgotten everything Ive ever learned in school since then. I took this summer to read Ickes shit and learn real history.

[freedomnonfighter]

Lol... it's amazing that this even needs to be reported!

It was middle school for me that I realized school was complete bullshit, and my religion too... and I just stopped caring for both (society in general). My "grades" (judgment) plummetted and I stopped going to church.

What amazes me is the total unconsciousness of parents these days:
'Oh you don't like school, honey?'
"No school sucks. I can never sit still because it's stupid and boring!"
'Oh, well you just have ADD, here take these pills daily and school will be just fine! These are the best days of your life, sweety!!'

Might as well rename all this ADHD crap to "School Pills"

My parents pulled that shit on me... I hated taking pills every day. I even told my mom I hated doing it because I just wanted to be me. Apparently grades are more important :rolleyes:
They put me on some ADD medicine that made me feel like shit and gave me a shitty attitude, and then gave me more pills to make me feel better! WTF? I just up and quit, I downright refused to take them anymore.

Be a good little drone :rolleyes:

Nobody likes what everything is right now, but everybody likes to keep on doing what they don't like... :confused:

...stupid Fear :)

[gorgeousbutterfly]

Lol... it's amazing that this even needs to be reported!

It was middle school for me that I realized school was complete bullshit, and my religion too... and I just stopped caring for both (society in general). My "grades" (judgment) plummetted and I stopped going to church.

What amazes me is the total unconsciousness of parents these days:
'Oh you don't like school, honey?'
"No school sucks. I can never sit still because it's stupid and boring!"
'Oh, well you just have ADD, here take these pills daily and school will be just fine! These are the best days of your life, sweety!!'

Might as well rename all this ADHD crap to "School Pills"

My parents pulled that shit on me... I hated taking pills every day. I even told my mom I hated doing it because I just wanted to be me. Apparently grades are more important :rolleyes:
They put me on some ADD medicine that made me feel like shit and gave me a shitty attitude, and then gave me more pills to make me feel better! WTF? I just up and quit, I downright refused to take them anymore.

Be a good little drone :rolleyes:

Nobody likes what everything is right now, but everybody likes to keep on doing what they don't like... :confused:

...stupid Fear :)

that happened to me too, not only add pills but anti depressants. they been doing that for many many years. the thing with school i found was that everybody was conforming and nobody questioned anything so i was bored with just accepting everything they told us. i always felt what we were taught was b.s.

[john white]

British satire (which this stonkingly funny article from bicycle most certainly is) doesnt play well across the Atlantic

[freedomnonfighter]

Haha, apparently not... that's just the kind of stuff I'd expect to see in a news paper over here though :o

British Satire = American Reality?? :p

[siliconpsychosis]

I would so love to see a campaign to inform young people about the psychological warfare being inflicted on them by the elite. Imagine the impact if all the young people recognised what was going on and united against the elite. I expect the younger generation would be far more open to the whole conspiracy arena than many adults, since they have not suffered so many years of conditioning and programming than adults.
I understand that, sadly,young people cannot vote in elections. Nevertheless if there was a political movement solely aimed at informing young people about the twisted society we live in, I think a powerful force would emerge. A force that would reject institutionalised programming techniques. The elite would be terrified.

[whitewolf]

All of you who have been given pills, walked out of these institutions for social control (school) can see so easily through the bullshit we've been fed 24/7 etc, etc etc, you've heard of the Indigo children??
If not then start here, http://www.indigochild.com/ cos you all sound like Indigos to me. :D
love and freedom for all
xxx